Hello radical humans! I'm baaack! Gosh I started this story in summer last year, I think, and I've been too lazy to complete it... until now. Hahaha this is just a little something something for all the people in the A&A fandom (it'll be hard seeing this show go whew). Happy Holidays you guys! :D
I seriously hope you guys bear with my formatting of the timelines (AND MY TENSES) because I suck at them. I'm really sorry if you guys get confused with the dates, the bolds, italics, etc. (I'm such a messy writer lol)
So uh, read and review?
Disclaimer: I do not own Austin and Ally, Ross and Laura, Photograph (by the amazingly talented Ed Sheeran), or anything else you might recognize.
Loving can hurt
Loving can hurt sometimes,
but it's the only thing that I know
They knew things would get hard between them. Well, what did they expect? Both of them were 'in the biz' as the paparazzi would say, every single thing they did had a major impact on their careers. They also had to face the fact that, no, they weren't going to be a normal couple, and that their careers would always come before their relationship.
But with that in mind, they continued to push through and put everything on the line.
Because after all, love is everything.
2011- Spring, 2015
When it gets hard,
You know it can get hard sometimes,
It is the only thing that makes us feel alive
Laura remembers the first time they dated, she had received thousands of tweets after the announcement. Most of them were happy and encouraging like: "You'll do great as a girlfriend!" or "Oh my God! I've dreamt of this since the first episode! #RAURAFTW!", but some tweets, whew, they were a whole lot different.
"Why didn't you tell me?" He said with a clipped tone, obviously pissed.
She bit her lip, she was never good at hiding her feelings, but she thought that she could have this one under control.
"What are you talking about?"
"The tweets, Laura. Did you really think you could keep them away from me?" He let out a laugh, although it was anything but humorous.
"No." She quivered, "but I thought I could keep it to myself until it died down, you know?"
He ran an irritated hand through his hair, and cut her off. "Laura, why do you think we're dating?"
"Because we love each other." she said in a weak tone.
"Exactly. And because you and I know that we'll always have each other's back." His exhaled loudly, letting all the frustration out. He then proceeded to look at her with the most pained expression his eyes could ever muster, and pulled her into a tight embrace.
"You could've told me Laura," He said softly. "I could've been there for you, you know?" He started to stroke her hair gently, inhaling the scent of vanilla.
"I know. And I'm sorry, you were busy with the album, I didn't want to bother you with my tiny problems." She whimpered, nose buried against his chest. "You probably wouldn't have understood them anyway.", she muttered to herself.
"Your problems are never too small for me, you're my girlfriend. And I do understand, I get hate everyday, remember?" He kissed her hair and let his lips linger there.
Laura nodded in contentment and understanding. "Thank you, for putting up with me."
"Yeah yeah, I'm the greatest boyfriend ever." He said , earning a punch from his girlfriend.
"You know, your fans really shouldn't treat you that way. They are called fans for a reason." She added, a few moments later.
"Yeah, I know. But that doesn't bother me at all, I have you, don't I?"
We keep this love in a photograph
We make these memories for ourselves
Where our eyes are never closing,
Hearts were never broken,
And time's forever frozen still
"Smile!"
The brunette looked startled at the sudden outburst. She turned around to see who was the obstructor of her peace, a blond wearing wearing a red flannel shirt with a camera dangling from his neck.
"Ross! I'm working on a song. What do you want?" She said exasperated.
"I want you to, let me take your picture, baby." He sang, beautifully at that.
Great, now he's singing, she thought. "Roooss, please, you know I can't resist you when you're singing." He rolled his eyes, doesn't she know that she's cuter when she's whiny?
"I'll save it for a rainy day, I don't need much I guess I'm just-"
She cut him off before he could finish the lyric. "Why do you want a picture of me so badly? I see you everyday."
"Because, when we're older, we're going to look back at this, and I'll get to see your pretty face on my camera." She rolled her eyes, cheesy, that's Ross.
"Fine, you can take a picture of me, just one. But I won't smile." Ross raised his hands up in victory, and positioned the camera towards his face.
"1, 2, 3, Smile!"
He doesn't understand why he remembers that at all. All he did was take a picture of her, he's done that plenty of times. Maybe it's because she looked extremely adorable that day, or because that simple moment reminded him of everything they used to be. Then again, maybe it's because that picture's been boring a hole on his jeans for months now.
Ross sighs. Whatever the real reason is (although he was pretty sure it was the latter), he wishes that he could stay in that moment forever, where he hadn't fucked things up with Laura.
So you can keep me,
Inside the pocket of your ripped jeans
Holdin' me closer til' our eyes meet
You won't ever be alone
Ross still has the photo safely tucked with him wherever he goes. He has it in every concert, every bus ride, every flight, basically everywhere. It makes him remember who he is, and it makes him feel less lonely (which is weird because as a photo, it's inanimate). He doesn't think that he could function properly without it.
"Riker, have you seen anyone get close to my bag in the past 24 hours?" God, he sounded so paranoid, but it's Laura's picture, his girlfriend, surely he's allowed to be crazy, right?
"Umm no? Why, did you lose something?" His older brother questioned.
"Yeah, kinda... it's no big deal. It's just a picture." But it is a big deal, it's Laura for God's sake.
Riker looked confused, but he dismissed it right away. "Well, I hope you find it then."
"I will. Thanks for your help."
"Rydel, have you seen anyone get near my bag?" "No, sorry."
"Ell, have you seen a photo taken from my bag?" "Sorry dude, haven't seen anyone near your bag all day."
"Rocky, have you seen anyone sneak into my bag and take something?"
"Is the something a picture of Ms. Laura Marano?" He smiled coyly. He is so dead, he thought.
He glared at Rocky fiercely, which would totally be out of line if it wasn't for Laura. "Where are you hiding it?"
"Relax, I have it here. And it's just a prank, don't be all bitchy about it." He reached inside his pocket, pulling out a mildly creased photo of Laura, his Laura.
Ross grabbed the photo before Rocky could say another word. He muttered 'fuck off', and walked out of the room.
He inspects the photo again after 5 months of not looking at it. Her face still looks as radiant as the day he took the photo. His heart swells, 'how could I have let her go?', he thinks.
He stuffs the picture back in his bag just as quickly as he grabbed it. He can't handle that much pain right now.
And if you hurt me,
That's okay baby,
Only words bleed
Inside these pages you just hold me,
And I won't ever let you go
Ross can remember the fight with no problem, it was the last time they talked in over three months, he'd probably still remember it even if he had amnesia. You see, Laura got booked for a tour, and didn't tell him until the day before it started.
"But we talked about this!" He said, almost like a whiny child.
"I know we did, but I still just feel insecure about your fans." Insecure? That's why they're breaking up? Not gonna happen.
"It doesn't matter what they think! We love each other, how do you not get that?" He said, slightly irritated.
"Yeah..." He raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to carry on with her sentence. When she didn't, he spoke up his own thoughts.
"Laura, why are you really breaking up me? Is there another guy or something?" She didn't answer, which pissed Ross off (Rocky says it's because he has temper issues -but he'd never believe him-). "Goddammit Laura, tell me!"
"I'm going on tour, okay!" She screamed, and the room became still. Tour? Laura's going on tour? 'What the fuck.', he thought.
After a few moments, Laura piped up softly. "I leave tomorrow."
His head quickly snapped back to Laura. "Jesus, you're breaking up with me because you're going on tour? Oh, and you're telling me this the day before it starts. Genius, really."
Laura rolled her eyes at his sarcasm, of course he would take it like this. That was the main reason why she didn't tell him up until this moment. "Ross, this isn't some kind of joke. And yes, I am breaking up with you because I know that a long distance relationship will never work betwe-"
"Bullshit!" He shouted, making Laura jump in surprise. "You're the one thinking like this, like we don't even have a chance at long distance! I love you, and you love me, can't you understand that?"
"I'm breaking up with you because I love you! I can't bear to see us drift apart because of this damn tour!" She was in tears, but Ross didn't care, or understand at that matter. He was supposed to be the one crying, she's the one leaving him, but it's going the other way around.
For a moment, only heavy pants were heard in the room, they were too much in shock and in disbelief of what they had uttered.
"Laura" he said, sounding like a father talking to his child. "We won't be like the others, we love each other too much. And you don't know what you're talking about, you leaving on tour isn't the end of the world." Ross was trying to lighten up the mood, but Laura just looked more angry after what he said.
"And do you know what you're talking about? I don't want us breaking up because we can't be together physically anymore, I'd rather be your best friend forever than be your girlfriend who you're just going to just fall out of love with, okay? " She said sternly. Okay, he thought, this is what you want?
"Whatever, have an awesome tour. I'm leaving." He drawled, before slamming the door, leaving her all alone.
Ross takes another swig of beer. He's been at this bar for two hours now, leaving his band right after their show. He knows he's been thinking shit (he's been doing that for the past few months now), but he doesn't care.
Laura's gone. She fucking hates him. He doesn't know if he should be sad or angry at himself. God, it's all his fault, he was the one that got mad at her, he didn't even allow her to explain. But maybe it's not his fault, maybe it's Laura's? She was the one who left him.
He's just so confused and mad (at Laura and himself). He didn't know how to think straight, much less act straight in public (which is probably why the public hates him).
"FUCK." He slams his glass on the counter, it's not like he startled anyone, the bar's empty anyway.
'Ross Lynch found drinking in a sloppy bar' What would the media think? Somehow, he finds himself laughing at the circumstance.
Oh you can fit me,
Inside the necklace you got when you were 16,
Next to your heartbeat,
Where I should be
Keep it deep within your soul
It was her 16th birthday, and she was spending it at work. Can you believe that? Her most special day of the year, and she didn't even get a day-off. But ehh, she didn't really mind it much. She loved the people she worked with, and they returned that love to her as well.
She loved that year especially, because of the gift that she had received from her mother. It was a silver circular-shaped locket, etched with the words "Always and Forever" and her initials, L.M.M. Inside was her mother's photo, looking radiant and bright as the sun - like her -.
She didn't love it because of the design though, she loved it because of the things that it represented. It made her think of innocence, of trust, and of her once whole heart.
"Mom?"
"Hmm?" Her mother was currently preparing her 'Birthday Banquet' (yes, Banquet) that consisted of different kinds of Italian food - cooked by her dad - and presents from her cast and fans.
"Thank you for the locket, it's beautiful."
Ellen beamed at her daughter who, after all her fame, didn't lose her humility. "Oh, you saw it on set?", she asked nonchalantly.
Laura walked over to her mom, embracing her from behind. "Yeah, how could I not? It was wrapped in red cloth, which you absolutely know is my weakness."
"That's why I chose it, honey."
"Mmhmm. You're the best mom ever."
"No need to remind me dear. After all, I did give birth to a wonderful child."
Laura considered the locker as her sorta good luck charm (her mom gave it to her - nothing could be luckier than that -)
Laura decides to replace the content of her locket three years after that moment, in the middle of her tour (and a month after her messy break up). It was in New York, the place she considers most important to her and Ross. They practically had their first official date there ("We've had plenty of dates before!" "Yeah, as Austin and Ally.").
Maybe it was how Central Park makes her recall the time when Ross dropped his pretzel on the grass, or how the Empire State Building reminds her of the lights that gleamed during her first real kiss with him.
She has this weird mindset that yes, she would have her mother forever - she was sure of that -, but Ross was… difficult. She's still uneasy about the breakup that occurred months ago and even though she was the one who broke up with him, she kinda sorta wants him back.
Oh, who is she kidding? She regrets that wretched decision the second he walked out of the room.
She wants, no, needs him back so bad, but she isn't very confident that he wants her back as well. So in the meantime, she deludes herself with his presence in the form of a photograph.
Summer, 2015
When I'm away,
I will remember how you kissed me,
Under the lamppost back in sixth street
Hearing you whisper through the phone
It was never supposed to happen, and Laura was a hundred percent sure that she shouldn't have been there, but it's Ross, and Ross always comes first.
Laura didn't know what she was doing, she wasn't supposed to be here, she broke up with him, no, practically left him heartbroken the day before her tour. She had no business to be here. And she was fairly certain that Ross wasn't supposed to be here too - he's leaving for Europe in an hour -.
But she thought, 'this could be my ticket in ending this, once and for all.'
Oh she was so damn wrong.
"Ross, why are we here?"
"Umm, hey Laura, I wanted to talk to you, in private." Was he nervous? Heck yeah, this was his last and only chance in making things right with Laura.
"What about? You do know you're going on tour in an hour right?" In fact, he did know. That was why he chose a spot near to the airport because if this doesn't work out... (he's praying that it will)
He stood there, staring at her for more than what constituted as 'normal', not able to find words on how he was going to explain his predicament.
Well, here goes nothing.
"I still love you."
Her eyes became wide, deeply searching his for any sign of doubt. He must be kidding right? She left him, and he allowed her to leave him. If he was, well, normal, his feelings would've left with him when he walked out the door.
"What?!" She asked maybe a little too sharply, because a millisecond later, she saw Ross cringe slightly.
He looked at her solemnly, eyes sad and tired like he didn't sleep all week (which was probably true considering the fact that she had seen him in that state multiple times). He just looked so so helpless, and it was killing her that she was the cause of all this.
"I still love you."
Okay, this was not supposed to be the way that this going. Ross should not be standing with a pained expression, and she shouldn't be there gaping like a fish.
Goodbye. Closure. End. Goodbye. Closure. End. It was like a mantra to him.
Ross continued to look at her, mind racing too fast. He knew it was dumb admitting his feelings literally minutes before the biggest tour of his life, but if this was going to be the last time he saw her, then this risk would be worth everything he worked for.
The only teensy weensy problem is that she wouldn't react. How would he know if she felt the same? If she felt intimidated? Angry? She was literally giving him the blankest of faces.
Should he just leave? Maybe she didn't want him here.
As he started to turn his heel and walk away, she shouted squeakily at him. "Wait! I love you too!" He immediately turned around, heart beating erratically at this point.
"What?" He said, out of breath.
"I love you." She was surprised that her voice didn't crack while saying that. She put her head down and waited for him to respond.
When Laura noticed that he hadn't talked in awhile, she became afraid that maybe he had left her in her train of thought (she could be very unobservant at times). She panicked, no no no no, not this again.
She looked up, finally losing her patience, and saw that he was smiling. No, grinning. Grinning at her while she was trying to compose herself. "Look Ross,-"
Before she could finish her sentence, a pair of lips captured hers, Ross' lips in particular.
They were kissing. Kissing like nothing in the past mattered, like their relationship - even more so their friendship - wasn't on the line.
When they pulled back, Ross had a goofy smile plastered on his face, and she couldn't help but laugh at the unexpected outcome of their talk.
"Oh my god, you're leaving for tour-", she said while gasping for breath. "-I just kissed you, and now we're laughing! What happened?" More snorts escaped her mouth (or nose? He wasn't sure.)
"I honestly don't know." He was leaving for Pete's sake, and instead of heading to the airport and settling down, he was here, kissing a girl he had supposedly broken up with.
She flung her slim arms around his neck. Gosh, how she missed holding him tight. She had a rough couple of months without him constantly reassuring her that everything was okay.
"I thought you hated me Laur laur.", he said as he ran fingers through her smooth hair.
"I'm an actress, it's my job to make people believe what I do." He nodded in understanding, "Yeah, you're right."
They probably would've stayed like that for an hour if not for Ross' phone ringing wildly. "Crap. Umm, I think that's Riker checking up on me. May I?"
She released her hands from his neck, allowing him to reach his phone. "Sure.", she didn't like to admit it, but she kinda wished his arms were wrapped around her again.
He cast an apologetic glance at her before answering his phone. "Hey Riker... Uhuh... Yeah?... I'll be there in 20... See you then... Wait, no!"
He turned around, bright pink from the recently concluded phone call. "Uhh, Laura... Riker kinda guessed that I'm with you, and he said that he was going to 'kick my ass' if I didn't come to the tour bus right now."
"So I guess I'll see you in 5 months?" She gave a sad smile, and his heart broke all over again.
"No, don't say that. I'll be back before you know it." He pulled her
"Laura, I-I think I gotta go. The guys have been looking for me since morning." If Ross used his heart in making his decisions, he would have given up tour in a, well, heartbeat. Seeing Laura's face all sad and disappointed made him want to hug her tightly and never let her go.
But he had a band, and despite all his personal wants, it always had to come first.
"So I guess this is goodbye." The fact that she quoted Ally crushed him. He knew he wasn't good in memorizing titles, lyrics, or anything that involved Austin and Ally, but he never forgot this one for some reason.
"I'll be back before you know it." Tears were threatening to spill from his eyes, and he could not allow that. Be a man and get a grip.
So he kissed her again. He kissed her because it was either that, or him crying his eyes out. She responded quickly, wrapping her arms around his neck tightly like her life depended on it. Pretty soon, her hands began to grab his hair, tugging his blond locks as if it would make him stay.
Well that escalated quickly.
"I wish things weren't like this." She said in between breaths.
"Me too, Laur laur. " He breathed out. "You have no idea."
"You'll be the first to know when I come back, I swear.", he mumbled right after they broke their passionate lip-lock.
"Mmm okay." She snuggled closer to him, pointing her toes so she could drape her head on his neck. He took in her familiar vanilla scent greedily for he knew that he wouldn't get a chance to do so once he left for tour.
"Laura?" He nudged the brunette and she pulled away from him. "I've got to go, the uh, the band's waiting for me at the airport."
"Yeeeah, you better catch the plane or else they might leave ya!", she affirmed with fake enthusiasm, although he could clearly spot her change in expression. He didn't say anything afterwards, he knew that if he did, he would immediately break down, and he didn't want to embarrass himself in front of Laura (or miss his flight).
He gave her one last squeeze before walking off to the airport.
Winter, 2015
She gets a call three months later at the ungodly hour of 4:38 AM, and strangely enough, she knows it's him.
"Laura, I'm-"
"Back." She finishes for him, smiling widely like she just won the lottery.
Oh wait, what's happening now, is so much better than the lottery.
Wait for me to come home.