Stop and Stare
I think I'm moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I've become what I can't be, oh
Stop and Stare
You start to wonder why you're here not there
And you'd give anything to get what's fair
But fair ain't what you really need
Oh, can you see what I see?

Chapter One – Stop and Stare

It was a normal morning in the year 2026. The birds were out and chirping, the blue sky was cloudless and the air was crisp. A wind began to pick up, blowing some leaves across the street in downtown London. People were hustling and bustling about, dashing to get a present for that forgotten cousin, or ingredient that missed your list. The shops were open only a few hours in the afternoon, and then they packed up, shut it down, and headed home to their families on this Christmas Eve.

Arianna walked out of the mansion she lived in with her grandparents and zipped up her jacket. It was a ten minute walk from her home to the home of her best friend Isabella. She hummed a little tune to herself as she walked to keep herself occupied.

Well, slightly occupied. Her brain was too big to be completely occupied by a simple tune.

Halfway to Isabella's she started to pat the rhythm of the song on her leg and silently sang the song, focusing on the beat on one hand and pretending to strum the rhythm on the other hand. The wind began to pick up and she shivered a bit and instead shoved her hands deep into her pockets.

"I've been gone for so long now, chasing everything that's new. And I've forgotten how I got here, but I've not forgotten you. We were just children but our eyes opened and you were all that I could see. You came close enough to hear my hearts beat but still not close enough for me…" Arianna murmured to herself, getting louder for the chorus. "Through the good times and the bad, you were the best I never had, the only chance I wish I had to take. But there was no writing on the wall, no warning signs to follow, I know now and I just can't forget…You're the best I never had. Na na na, mmm…"

*.*.*.*.*

"There are five of us now...Mum, Dad, Mickey and…the baby."

"You're not…"

…

"No, Mum is; she's three months gone."

Those words echoed in the Doctor's head inside the TARDIS as tears dripped down his cheeks.

A baby.

The baby.

No, certainly not. Not his baby at least. Just because he let himself finally give into the woman he resisted for so long doesn't mean that he was the one to knock up Rose. He didn't even knock anybody up. Pete did that to Jackie.

Wait…that didn't make any sense. They hadn't been there that long. Not three months anyway. He checked the time circuits on the control panel. No, it said it was Christmas Eve, 2006. So it had to be Christmas Eve in the parallel universe too. The war happened five weeks ago…

The TARDIS jumped to life suddenly and he heard the most beautiful voice singing his favorite melody from Gallifrey, but in English! The TARDIS whirred and the Doctor grabbed onto the rail so he didn't fall over. It was in English, English! He hadn't heard the song in so many years, who was singing it?

Apparently the TARDIS decided to take a little trip. The blue box shook with energy and spun like a top, throwing the Doctor every which way. The voice got stronger and louder and the TARDIS shook a bit more violently.

"What are you?" The Doctor shouted to the voice but it didn't respond. "Who are you?"

Suddenly, all went quiet. The TARDIS stopped shaking and the voice stopped. Before letting go of the rail, the Doctor glanced from one side of the control room to the other through his peripheral vision. No one was with him.

He was alone.

However. He heard giggling from outside the TARDIS and some more singing, but not as beautiful.

"Dreams. That's where I hafta go to see your beautiful face anymore. I stare at a picture of you and listen to the radio. Hope! Hope there's a conversation. We both admit we had it good. But until then its alienation I know that much is understood. And I realize…" Isabella burst out of her house and joined Arianna and handed her a headphone, laughing.

"If you ask me how I'm doing, I would say I'm doing just fine. I would lie and say that you're not on my mind. But I go out, and I sit down at a table set for two, and finally I'm forced to face the truth. No matter what I say I'm…not over you. Not over you…"Arianna joined in with her and the Doctor stuck his head out the TARDIS and saw the two girls walking away from the TARDIS and was glad they didn't notice the blue police box from the 1960s.

"Damn! Damn girl you do it well, and I thought you were innocent." This was the voice, the voice the Doctor heard inside the TARDIS. It wasn't the blonde girl, it was the brunette. "Took this heart and put it through hell, but still your magnificent. I, I'm a boomerang, doesn't matter how you throw me. I turn around and I'm back in the game, even better than the old me. But I'm not even close without you…" It was the exact same (completely redundant, scratch the same, the Doctor thought to himself). It was the exact voice he had heard in the TARDIS. What did that mean? Who was she?

"If you ask me how I'm doing, I would say I'm doing just fine. I would lie and say that you're not on my mind. But I go out, and I sit down at a table set for two, and finally I'm forced to face the truth. No matter what I say I'm...not over you…" Arianna continued to sing, completely oblivious to the man staring at them from the blue box.

At this point, Isabella joined her and the two finished the song together. "And if I had the chance to re-new…You know there isn't a thing I wouldn't do. I could get back, on the right track, but only if you'd be convinced, so until then.. If you ask me how I'm doing, I would say I'm doing just fine. I would lie and say that you're not on my mind. But I go out, and I sit down at a table set for two, and finally I'm forced to face the truth. No matter what I say I'm…not over you. Not over you…Not over you…Not over you…" The finished in a fit of giggles.

"Good mornin' Ari!" Isabella told her friend, using her nickname.

"Good mornin' Isa." Arianna returned the favor by using her nickname, and laughed. "Oh! Dandelion!" The brunette darted from next to her friend and yanked the weed out of the ground, closed her eyes and blew. Isabella rolled her eyes at her friend and continued to walk without her.

"Hey!" Arianna shouted and sprinted to her friend. "C'mon Isa, it's what I do. I've been doin' it since I was seven years old and Mum died. I always –"

"Wish for the same thing. Yes I know, Arianna." Isabella finished for her. "You're nineteen years old, don't you think it's time to move on?"

"You wouldn't understand Isabella. You have two perfect parents. I'm stuck with Nana and Granddad. My mum died when I was seven! I never knew my dad. I only have a name. Barely!" Arianna said, exasperated. "I've never seen a picture, I've never heard his voice, I don't even know what he looks like! I've only heard stories."

"Are you sure that he wasn't just like…a sperm donor?"

Arianna laughed at her friend's silliness. "No, no, I've heard too many stories, you've heard too many stories. (Isabella shrugged, knowing it was true). I know my mum loved the bloke and I suppose…he loved her too. Nana always told me that he adored her."

"You suppose? I've heard your Nana talk about him and her like they were Romeo and Juliet. Forbidden, but so much in love. Everyone against it, but everyone seein' how much they were in love." Isabella sighed, twirling a lock of her shiny blonde hair in her perfectly manicured left hand. "Why can't I have my Romeo?"

"Excuse me, where's my Romeo?" Arianna countered.

"Oh please, you have your Romeo. He's just…"

"On the other side of the planet?"

"California!" She shouted indignantly. "But…I suppose he's kinda on the other side of the planet." She muttered under her breath.

The two girls walked in silence for a bit, the headphones sending music into Isabella's right ear and Arianna's left ear. The Doctor still trailed behind them, close enough to hear their conversation. His hearts went out to her, knowing how bad it felt being completely alone, even feeling all alone hurts too.

His thoughts drifted back to Rose. His Rose. (Woah.) When did he become possessive? When he admitted everything to her? When he lost her to another universe? Speaking of alternate universes, what year was it? Obviously it was Earth, but where? London? Probably. Sounds right according to the two ahead of him. He looked up and saw the Zeplins. No, that's not possible. He closed the breach. He just did that, nothing would ever make him forget that, forget Rose. How was he in a different universe…again?

"In this motel, well past midnight…" Arianna started to sing and took out the headphone in her ear. "And I'm bluer than a bruise. You come drifting in through the half-light, in your funny yellow shoes. And I hope that's you standing at my doorway, and that's the scratching of your key. And I hope this song I'm singing someday finds you, my letter to Elise…

"Mmmm…Through the good times and the bad, you're the best I never had. The only chance I wish I had to take. There was no writing on the walls, no warning signs to follow. I know now, I just can't forget. You're the best I never had. Nana nanana, best I never had. Nana nanana mmm, best I never had nana nanana." Arianna sang softly.

"Every time you sing that, I swear, I get goose bumps. It's so beautiful." Isabella praised. "Where did you find that?"

"Sometimes it's good to read." Arianna smiled her tongue in teeth grin, the same one she got from her mother. "You never know whatcha gonna find."

"I'm not the type that lays in her bed and reads books about alien planets and stuff like that! That's you. Just be glad we haven't seen in alien since…" Isabella trailed off, biting her lip forgetting what happened that day.

"Twelve years ago. We haven't seen an alien in twelve years and my mother was right there, protecting me." Arianna sniffed and pulled a purple daisy out the bush on her left. She smelled it and smiled slightly, then put it in her hair, making it stay between her sunglasses and her skull. Arianna sniffed again and Isabella gave her a one armed hug.

"Hey now. You are probably the strongest person I have ever met. And I don't doubt for a moment that you won't find your father, trust me. I just don't want you to get hurt like your mother did. And I'm pretty sure that's why they haven't told you anythin'." Isabella tried to console her upset friend.

"I know!" Arianna cried, turning left suddenly and taking off down the street.

"Oh no… Arianna Rose Tyler! You know what happened the last time you went there." Isabella called after her but Arianna didn't stop, she kept running. "Oh I cannot believe you are making me run in these shoes." Isabella muttered and then ran after her. The Doctor sped up his pace to keep up with them slightly, his feet taking over while his brain froze. Arianna Rose Tyler. Arianna. Rose. Tyler.

No…

Oh God, he did knock up Rose Tyler.

His feet carried him inside the gated area the two girls went into and he didn't bother to read the sign. Something inside told him where he was.

Maybe it was the sudden chill in the air.

Maybe it was the smell of wet cement.

Maybe it was all the tombstones.

Nah, definitely not the tombstones.

The Doctor watched from the shadows as Arianna slumped to her knees in front of a grave and traced the letters in the cement and mouthed the words etched into it. He couldn't bear to see the tears dripping down her face. She must've removed her sunglasses when she went down and with a shaking hand, she placed the purple daisy into the soil. He watched her friend, Isabella, bend down and pull her up into a hug. They let go and arm-in-arm they left the graveyard. The Doctor made sure they were gone before stepping out of the shadows and up to the grave.

RIP Rose Jacqueline Tyler

Born: November 18, 1986

Died: May 2, 2014

Protecting the Earth till the very end.

Now it was his turn to fall to the ground on his knees. It was his turn to trace the letters on the tombstone. It was his turn to have some tears running down his face as he did so. The flower Arianna placed was drooping a bit and he attempted to fix it, or at least, make it straighter. His attempts were futile and he just laid it right against the tombstone and he lost it. The Doctor, the most not human thing on the (parallel universe) Earth, was crying – no – he was sobbing with the loss of someone he loved so much and he couldn't do a thing about it. The Doctor pressed his forehead against the cool, slightly damp cement of his lover's tombstone, his tears watering the solitary flower at her grave.