"Ow!" I muttered when a box from the top shelf of my closet fell off and hit me in the head. I knew it was mostly my fault for keeping my closet packed full of things that were mostly junk. I then looked down and noticed that the contents of the box had fallen out on the floor. I smiled wistfully when I saw that they were of me, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny in our freshman year. Looking through the pictures, I noticed how thin and depressed Kyle looked in the pictures later in the year. I felt a slight chill go up my spine when I noticed how dead he looked in the picture that was taken right after winter break. I figured that if I had known sooner then maybe I could have helped him, if I wasn't so oblivious I might have seen the signs. I sighed knowing that it wasn't any use to think of the what ifs, it was too late to turn back the clocks and all I was left with was a box full of memories.
One Year Earlier
I finished putting on my shirt and looked at my reflection in the mirror, tired but excited blue eyes stared back at me. Today was my first day of high school, Kyle said that a lot of freshmen get picked on a lot by the upperclassmen, I didn't care though, and I was just excited to be this close to being finished with school completely.
"Your friend is here, Turd!" I heard Shelly call from downstairs; this was her first year since she graduated and she still had no plans for what she wanted to do. I, on the other hand, knew that I wanted to be a veterinarian.
"I'm coming!" I yelled back. I raked my fingers through my short black hair and grabbed my backpack before waking downstairs. When I reached about the middle step, I could see Kyle waiting for me in my living room.
"Where are Kenny and Cartman?" I asked even though I didn't much care were Cartman was.
"We're out here." I heard two voices call in unison. When I got outside, I was shocked at what I saw. Kenny had gained weight, I mean a lot of weight, and he was as big as Cartman.
"Wow Kenny, that year you were living with your grandparents changed you a bit." I blurted out. Luckily, he just chuckled and agreed with me. Last year, Kenny's parents decided to take their kids to live with their grandparents so they could curb their alcoholic addiction and get jobs. Kenny had moved back here with his grandparents not too long ago so I doubted that his parents made any progress.
"We better go so we don't miss the bus." Kyle said. The joys of freshman year, the kids are too young to drive but too old for the bus to wait on them. The bus pulled up just as we reached the bus stop, when I stepped on it, I was surprised to see Butters and Wendy sitting together holding hands. I wasn't jealous or anything, Wendy and I had broken up for good in grade six and we have dated other people between then but it shocked me seeing her with Butters.
"When did you guys get together?" I asked trying to sound casual. Believe it or not, Wendy and I were still pretty good friends.
"This summer; Bebe was dating him because they're both blond and both their names start with B, but then she found out that his real name is really Leopold so she dumped him for Bradley Biggle." Wendy replied.
"Wendy comforted me after that; we ended up really getting to know each other then." Butters added in. He didn't speak in that nervous tone like he used to. He had grown up a lot in body and mind.
"Then we fell for each other." Wendy finished with a light smile pulling at her lips.
"Congrats." I said before going to sit in my normal seat at the back of the bus beside Kyle. Kenny and Cartman were trying to squeeze together in the seat across from us but their large bulks wouldn't allow them to. They then gave up and went to go sit by other people.
"I don't see why they don't get a bigger bus." Kyle grumbled. The high school students were forced to ride the short bus because they figured that most of them drove their own cars, this resulted in us having to double up in seats. After a short bus ride, we finally pulled up in front of the school. This is it, I thought taking a deep breath; I was actually starting high school. I went into the cafeteria and stood in the breakfast line. We were having cereal, a choice between Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Captain Berry Crunch, I chose the Captain Berry Crunch. I noticed that Cartman and Kenny both got two of each kind.
"You should save some for the other students." Kyle lectured them.
"Shut up Jew, there's plenty enough to go around." Cartman retorted. I rolled my eyes and decided not to get into it this time. Just as I was about to go sit at a table near the back of the cafeteria, Token walked up to me,
"Hey man, can I talk to you in private for a sec?"
"Sure." I said with surprise and slight suspicion, Token and I didn't really see eye to eye. When we reached the hallway, I could see how nervous he looked, he kept rubbing his hands on his jeans like they were dirty but he just couldn't get them clean.
"What's up?" I asked.
"Well um, I'm gay." He muttered looking down. This took me by surprise, Token seemed like the least likely person to be gay, and it also shocked me that he was probably going to confess his feelings for me.
"That's cool?" I said; it came out sounding more like a question than a statement though.
"I'm glad you're not freaked out, anyway I was wondering if…"
"Token, I'm sorry but I don't like boys that way." I said cutting him off.
"I don't like you." He replied with a slight eye roll. I knew I should have felt relieved, but to be honest, I felt a bit offended.
"Why not? What's wrong with me?" I demanded.
"Nothing, you're just not my type, I like petite feminine guys with red hair and…"
I narrowed my eyes slightly, it couldn't be…
"Are you talking about Kyle?" I blurted out, interrupting him yet again.
"Yea, I was wondering if you could help us get together like what does he like? What does he dislike?"
"How do you know he's gay?" I asked. As far as I knew, Kyle hadn't told anyone besides me.
"It's obvious, everyone knows it." Token said.
"So, will you help me?" He added.
"Sure, if it makes him happy to be with you then I will definitely help you guys get together." I said.
"Thanks, Man." Token said patting me on the shoulder before turning and walking down the hall. Just as I started to walk back to my cereal, the bell rang to start first hour. Dammit, I thought to myself, Token had made me miss breakfast! I decided to let the cafeteria workers take care of my cereal and I started walking to English class.
"Alright class, open your literature books to page two." Mrs Banks said in a voice that sounded like she was congested.
"Weak! We have to do work on the first day of school?" Cartman grumbled.
"This isn't elementary school; we don't coddle the students here!" Mrs Banks snapped.
"Whateva whateva I do what I want!" Cartman exclaimed.
"Go to the office now Mr Cartman." Mrs Banks said with a scowl going across her slightly wrinkled face.
"Screw you guys, I'm going home." Cartman said before walking out the classroom door. I rolled my eyes; Cartman was still leaving in the middle of class when things weren't going his way. The story we ended up reading was about a coyote and a buffalo, I can't remember the name of it now, and I honestly wasn't paying that much attention. As I was heading for Art class, I accidentally bumped into Kyle which caused him to spill his books all over the hallway.
"Sorry dude." I muttered helping him pick them up.
"No problem." He replied back.
"What class do you have this hour?" I asked.
"I have Art, what about you?"
"Same." I said with a smile, I was glad that I had a class with Kyle this hour. Usually we compare our schedules when we first get them, but I guess we were all too excited about high school to remember to do it this time. As we were walking, I meant to ask Kyle about Token, but I said something completely different instead.
"Why are your parents getting a divorce?"
"You really want to know?" Kyle asked leaning in close. I nodded in reply.
"My mother was cheating on my dad, now she's dating the man she cheated on him with and after the divorce is finalised, she's going to marry him." He whispered.
"That's a little quick." I muttered. Kyle nodded with agreement,
"You should see this guy; he looks like a dweeb who got picked on a lot so he decided to work out a lot."
"Meaning?" I asked with confusion.
"Meaning, he has like a comb over and coke bottle glasses but he also has the body of a body builder, he is ripped."
"Strange combination." I said with a slight laugh. Kyle stifled his laugh as we entered the Art Room. I rolled my eyes when I saw Token look from me to Kyle and back to me when he saw us enter.
"Hey Kyle, can I ask you something?" I asked to stop Token from looking at us like some kind of creeper.
"Sure." Kyle replied.
"Hold on, I'm going to go sit my bag on my desk." He added.
As he was doing that, Token came running up to me with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Read it." He whispered in my ear. I unfolded the paper and snorted a bit when I saw that Token had written a list of questions he wanted me to ask Kyle. I had put the paper back in my pocket just as Kyle came walking back over towards me, for some reason I didn't want him to see the note.
"What did you want to ask me?" He asked.
"Are you seeing anyone?" I asked trying to sound casual, but for some reason my voice struggled to come out and I ended up sounding a bit higher pitched than normal.
"No, why do you ask?"
I shook my head,
"No reason, what would your perfect first date be?"
"Horseback riding."
That shocked me, I didn't see Kyle as the type of person that would want to ride horses on their date; I didn't even know he liked horses.
"You never told me you liked horse riding." I said sounding a little more defensive than I meant to.
"I tried to get you to come with me all the time but you kept blowing me off for some girl." He said tinge of sadness in his eyes. I felt a rush of heat overcome me when I looked into his eyes; it was like I was seeing him through a new light. He wasn't just my best friend that I had known since I could remember anymore; he was an amazing and beautiful person, someone that I never wanted to be without. Before I could stop myself, my lips were already against his in a smooth sweet kiss. It lasted no more than eight seconds before he pulled away; I didn't know whether to smile or cry when I saw that he was blushing furiously.
"Are you okay?" I asked him.
"Yea, I have to go use the restroom." He replied before getting up to go ask the teacher for a hall pass. I found it amusing how as soon as the teacher had entered the room, he just ignored us and started playing on his computer. I heard him grunt a little before handing Kyle a hall pass, as soon as Kyle was out the door, Token walked up to me looking absolutely livid.
"How could you?" He seethed through clenched teeth.
"I'm sorry, it just happened, I'm just as surprised as anyone." I said.
"You really expect me to believe that? Why do you always get everything?" Token growled. That comment angered me a bit, Token lived in a huge house with a rich ass family and I lived with a jerk older sister who would probably be there until she's fifty and my dad who's a nut job.
"How do I get everything?" I demanded.
"Let's see, football team, you got captain and quarterback, baseball team, you got captain and pitcher, hockey team you got captain…"
"So, this is just about sports?" I asked cutting him off.
"No, you got Wendy, as soon as we broke up; she came back to you, and now you're taking Kyle too, do you like stealing my relationships?"
"Excuse me, but Wendy was with me first!" I exclaimed, I didn't see where Token got off on saying I had stolen Wendy from him when it was the other way around.
"Oh and by the way, Kyle was with me first too." I added.
"Kyle's not with you in that sense." Token defended.
"Not yet, but he will be." I said smiling as imagined it.
"You promised you'd help me get with him, I really like him; you can't take him away from me now that you already promised you'd get us together." Token whined.
"Yea dude, you can't go back on a promise." Clyde butted in and pretty soon most of the class was nodding in agreement with him. What a great time to realise you're in love with your best friend. I thought to myself bitterly as I glared at the class.
"Fine." I choked out, trying to keep myself from crying. Even though Kyle and I were never together in that sense, it still felt like my heart was being shattered into a million pieces.
"I knew you'd come around." Token said smugly. I would have hit him in his smug face right then if Kyle hadn't walked in the door right as I was beginning to raise my fist. I quickly uncurled my fingers and waved my hand up to wave at him. He looked at me like I was crazy before waving back.
"We need to talk about the kiss." He whispered when we were sitting back at our table. I wanted to tell him that I loved him and that I wanted to be with him, I wanted to tell him that I had loved him for a while but I was too stupid to realise it.
"I'm sorry about that." I said.
"It's fine, I actually kind of liked it, you know, I've had a crush on you for a long time." Kyle replied blushing. I wanted so badly to kiss him again right then but I remembered Token and the rest of the class.
"I wouldn't get your hopes up." I said.
"Why not?" Kyle asked with his smile drooping slightly.
"That kiss meant nothing," I lied, "Nothing at all."