Author's Note: So, the theme song I have for my Shichibukai OCs in Sweet Disposition is Optimistic by Radiohead, and listening to that song on repeat warranted this oneshot. This also does have a lot of "What ifs?" in regards to what the Shichibukai might be like after the age of Hancock/Crocodile/Mihawk/Doflamingo/Jinbei/Law/Moria.

Warnings: Sexual slavery, depression, suicide, and self-harm are all mentioned or alluded to. There are also some spoilers to Sweet Disposition.

Disclaimer: One Piece is the property of Eichiiro Oda. Please support the official release.

"This one's optimistic."

Garth "Metastasis" Sheffield

Garth has nobody. While Beal has that enigmatic healer of his, Isabella has her tight-knit group, and Nikolai has his family and all of the other residents of the Aeroflot, Garth has nobody to help him as Shichibukai. His wife is dead, and his daughter is doing God-knows-what.

Sure, he could call Desdemona and ask her for his help ("Call your daughter sometime, Sheffield!" Seven and Beal joke on the regular). But, Desdemona was also the reason he left home. He didn't raid high-profile Marine research bases for chemicals and expensive lab equipment just to impress his science-loving daughter. He only did it just so he could come home.

Home is a foreign concept to a man who steals lab equipment and chemicals to bomb World Government labs as revenge for ruining his own home island beyond repair. Home is a foreign concept to a man whose hometown was ruined by the closing of the Marines' chemical plant on the island and subsequent environmental destruction when the Marines dumped their chemicals into the island's soils and water reservoirs. Desdemona is a foreign concept to a man whose wife died and whose daughter is abandoned in the East Blue.

He tries to be optimistic, but on most days, he just wants to go home.

"This one went to market."

Yvonne "Drag City" Imlay
The Imlay Pirates (formerly a member of the Leo Pirates)

Sawyer Lockyer knows that he needs to watch his back.

Besides Yvonne, he was the only one to survive the Leo Pirates' Purge. And, the details still haunt him - Yvonne caught her captain, Peony, having a liaison with a Marine soldier. And not a high-ranking soldier like Fleet Admiral Lubkin or Commodore Novak; this was an expendable, nameless soldier, as expendable as the meat and fish bought at the market. If the meat were to spoil, you'd throw it away and buy a new cut. Just like meat and fish, Marines could be thrown away if they were no longer of use.

Then, Peony and Yvonne got into an argument, and Yvonne brought up the affair by accident. Peony kicked her out of the crew, but Yvonne came back later to hijack the ship and bring the Leo Pirates to the nearest Marine base. As Yvonne collected a handsome sum of money and prepared to join the Shichibukai, the Leos were executed by firing squad.

Sawyer continues to thank his lucky stars that he was visiting his family when the raid happened. He thanks his lucky stars that after Yvonne found out that he survived the attack, she allowed him to live and be her first mate. He thanks his lucky stars that Lynn, Jessamine, B.J., and Wally are also on the crew.

Sawyer doesn't thank his lucky stars that Yvonne "Drag City" Imlay is his captain.

"This one just came out of the swamp."

Isabella "Gone Girl" Sarutobi
The High Violet Pirates (formerly a member of the Capricorn Pirates)

Isabella is frowned upon not because her old crew is associated with the infamous Dragon Lady, but because of how attractive the High Violets are.

Isabella knows that her crew is attractive in their own ways - Molly's energy, Colin's apathetic, yet wry and intelligent, attitude, Jeffrey's sophistication and class, Lennon's lazy, yet effortless, "boyish" style, Delta's long, feathered, pitch-black hair, Cornell's kindness and humor, Charity's heart-shaped face, and Caleb's youthfulness are some of the prominent features of the crew.

The sayings are right; beauty is only skin deep. Everyone on the crew is using their positive, beautiful traits to hide their negative, ugly traits.

Both Molly and Isabella are in danger should they cross paths with the Capricorns again. To them, even crossing paths with the Dragon Lady is certain death, because the Capricorns will know if their boss crossed paths with Isabella and/or Molly.

Colin is apathetic because he was the one who took his sister to have the abortion that killed her.

Jeffrey is afraid that the Dragon Lady will prostitute him for his good looks, just like his mother. He and Lennon are childhood friends, and they're both scared of being pimped out together.

Lennon has already been prostituted because of his good looks, just like Jeffrey's mother. He and Jeffrey are childhood friends, and they're both scared of being pimped out together.

Delta is no longer speaking to her prim and proper family because of their ties to criminals. She's not as scared of becoming a prostitute, but the danger is very real for her. One false step, and her dad will sell her off to the Dragon Lady.

Cornell is still blaming himself for the death of his mother at the hands of the Dragon Lady. She was so kind, vibrant, and funny, just like him.

Charity is depressed and fears the day that she will have to explain the tears, scars, and bad days to her crew.

Caleb is resentful that his mother gave him up for adoption for his own safety. Mother knows best = Molly knows best. Molly didn't exactly know best when she put Caleb up for adoption to protect him from the Capricorn Pirates and/or the Dragon Lady.

Isabella is thankful that her crew isn't using their good looks for evil like the Capricorns.

"This one drops a payload."

Nikolai "MASSOLIT" Bok-Kirilov
The Bok-Kirilov Family

From an early age, Nikolai knew the importance of money.

When he lived in the run-down, rural cottage with his mother, money was something to be saved. Money meant a choice between new clothes or more food. Money meant a choice between hot water and electricity. Money literally meant life or death.

After his mother died and Nikolai's father brought him onto the Aeroflot, however, money became much more important. Money meant nice clothes to wear, fine, rich foods for dinner, the most expensive vodkas; basically, all of the finer things in life, and even more.

Money in the Bok-Kirilov family also meant other things. On the best days, it meant small bribes and maybe a new watch for Nikolai. On the worst days, it meant that the Bok-Kirilovs would be paid a handsome sum to kill an enemy of the family.

Nikolai is desensitized to the morally gray acts his family commits. He had to learn to get used to it and to suck it up in his early days of living on the Aeroflot. All he can do now is drink a bottle of vodka and pray that the next death isn't messy.

"Fodder for the animals."

Mac "The Chain" Amarcord
The Fleetwood Pirates

Mac knows that his crew is going to implode at any moment.

Stevie and Arachne know that they aren't supposed to sleep with Mac, but they do it anyway.

Doc Jed knows that his age, his drinking habits, drug use, and sex are killing him, but he drinks, does drugs, and has sex anyway. That Stevie girl is pretty, anyway.

Melba knows that Mac is cheating on her with the two new girls with the Southern accents and fashionable, yet tacky, clothes. But, she allows it anyway because she's done with Mac.

Mac and Melba both know that faking their own kidnappings and deaths were wrong, but they didn't want to put Troy in danger.

Someday, Troy will know all of this. He currently doesn't know all this. He's too busy searching for his parents with that Henderson boy and that Kumiko girl and a bunch of other Bohemian types who left their homes.

Or, does Troy know that he's searching for the parents that he used to know?

"Living on an animal farm."

Beal "Death in Heaven" Myles
The Dark Water Pirates

Beal sometimes feels like he is surrounded by animals. The members of the World Government are animals, his fellow Shichibukai are animals, and even the Shichibukai's own crew members are animals.

He tells Llewellyn, Kim, Indie, and Aomame this in private. Especially Aomame. He tells them that the wealthy elite are a bunch of animals, and everyone who sucks up to them - his own co-workers included - are their lapdogs. He hates the system, but is too afraid to change it out of fear of losing his life and the lives of his loved ones.

Beal wishes to go back to the days before he was Shichibukai. Before his family lost their home and were forced to live at a cheap motel. Before he had to kill the five millionaires who ruined his life. And, of course, before the sixth and final assassination, the job that got him hired to the animal farm known as the Shichibukai.

Beal is a slave to the system and he can't do jack shit about it.

"I'd really like to help you, man."

Seven "Lucky Seven" Weintraub
The Lucky Seven Pirates

Robbing a notorious West Blue crime boss isn't helping anybody.

Holding a notorious West Blue crime boss hostage for nearly two days isn't helping anybody.

Killing a notorious West Blue crime boss after the hostage situation never helped Seven. It only helped the World Government find their next Shichibukai.

Seven was only trying to help. All he wanted to do was help his family after his mother was murdered by a notorious West Blue crime boss.

Revenge is helpful, right?

"You can try the best you can. The best you can is good enough."

Fleet Admiral Dounia Lubkin

She's trying her best. Really, she is.

Fleet Admiral Lubkin knows that her last set of Shichibukai had the lowest public approval rating of all time. Those were the days of Nathan "Warden of the Mines" Vu Jr, Shenhua "The Dragon Lady" Jiang, Zander "Chieftain" Leach, Remy "Spider Webb" Webb, Lydia "Legal Eagle" Kroll-Wyandotte, "Top Chef" Quing-Ah Chin, and Vladimir "Cold War" Bok-Kirilov. They never got along, and there was no camaraderie between them.

While their ratings were disappointing with the general public to begin with, they dropped when the aging Quing-Ah retired, citing health problems and wanting to live his final days out worry-free. Then, Remy had a mental breakdown, killing herself and Zander in a very public murder-suicide. The Shichibukai's ratings went down even further, as Zander Leach was the most-liked by the public.

Vladimir then retired, and his son, Nikolai, took his place. The Shichibukai's public ratings didn't really change until Lydia was promoted to Yonkou; with the promotion of the other well-liked Shichibukai, approval ratings dropped to 30%, the lowest Shichibukai public approval rating ever.

Isabella, Beal, Garth, and Seven were all brought in to fill the voids that Quing-Ah, Remy, Zander, and Lydia left behind. Then, the Dragon Lady's position was revoked when she started a war in the Goa Kingdom and Nathan quit; that's when Mac and Yvonne came in to fill in the last two spots.

Every day, Fleet Admiral Lubkin tries her best to make the Shichibukai, widely regarded as the shining emerald in the crown that is the World Government, great again. So far, it seems to be working; there's no bad blood, and things are civil for once during meetings.

After all, the Shichibukai are trying their best as well. It's what they do to survive.