A/N: It is I! Back from the depths of writer's block and severe self-consciousness about my writing! I've decided to go with something a little different this time. It's still going to be gay, sorry cannon lovers, and it's not going to be my typical Vampire Knight fanfiction (holy shit hell hath frozen over!). I know it's shocking but the reality is I've always wanted to write for this fandom but never felt I could fully encompass the characters personalities to do them relative justice. With some self-esteem help and a break from my normal college load, I've come to the decision to post this. Is it going to be the best -Man fic out there? No, not at all. In fact, it's probably not even going to make it on the list of my best fics and that's a short ass list as is. Anyway, I realize I'm biased and very critical of my own work but I hope you guys like it! Constructive criticism as always is appreciated, flames shall be saved for Natsu if you please. As usual, if you don't like it then don't read it (common sense hoomans) and if you do like it don't be afraid to leave a review and/or a follow/favorite behind. They always make writers feel better, trust me. As I said I will do my best managing this and my other fics as well as college but I give no promises (education first guys I'm sorry T.T) so updates will likely be slow. Other than that ~Keep Calm and Fanfiction On~ please enjoy! ~Len-kun

49th

How hard did Kanda have to fall in order to become accepting of the idea that the person he loved would never be his nor would they ever be their true self? Too hard, way too hard, and he was reminded of this every time he saw that oh so joyful smile or heard the playful tone in the way "Yuu-chan" was said to him time and time again no matter how negatively he responded. It hurt so much to be near him and yet without that idiot there the world seemed to drain of all its life for Kanda. Sure Lenalee and the baka Moyashi were there, even when the Usagi wasn't and they helped but only slightly. Lenalee was too pure, too sweet to everyone, both of them just cared so much about lives. About people, strangers or not they were always too nice. But for Kanda, and for him, people were just that; people. There were few that mattered and even less they admired. If they died then they died, there wasn't much more to think about. He wasn't going to cry or pray for their souls, nor was he killing Akuma to set them free, he was killing Akuma because that was his job, they were in a war and you fight your enemies until one of you dies. The only other one to seem to understand that concept was him and Kanda would run himself through with Mugen before he went to that idiot. "Kanda, Komui wants to see us in his office." Lenalee smiled as she stood at the end of the table where the samurai was still muddling over his thoughts.

"When." It was a question but said as a statement, Kanda didn't ask questions after all.

"Right now, Allen is already there and I'm going to get Lavi from the library, I guess we're going on a mission together and from the sound of it there's going to be quite a bit of trouble waiting for us." She answered, not giving Kanda a chance to argue before she walked off to fetch the same idiot Kanda had been thinking about before he was interrupted. Looking down at his unfinished soba the Japanese native wondered how long he could avoid the baka usagi if they were assigned on a mission together.

"BaKanda, we've been waiting for you for like ten minutes, are you coming or not?" Allen shouted from the entrance to the mess hall. Kanda growled and glared at the short teen as he walked passed him down to Komui's office. The place where paper came in masses and never left.

"Ah Kanda! Glad you could make it too, now that you're all here I have a very important assignment for you four. You'll be leaving as soon as possible to head to a town in India. It has come to my attention that there is a rapidly growing number of Akuma in this town and you're being sent there to kill them all. I do not know if there is innocence there or not but if there is then do your best to collect it and bring it back here safely. Of course, don't forget to enjoy yourselves!" Komui smiled cheerfully as he sipped at his coffee cup.

"India huh? Interesting, hey Lavi didn't you say you were originally from India?" Allen questioned turning to the redhead who smiled and nodded in return. There was something off about his expression though, it was carefully guarded and Kanda only noticed because he was staring at the emerald eye usually so full of expression that he had no choice but to believe whatever Lavi said.

'I wonder what's going on with the Baka Usagi this time.' He questioned with narrowed eyes but said nothing, after all, it wasn't like Lavi would come to him with something that was troubling him. They weren't really friends even if the idiot had said they were from day one. 'Idiot. Shouldn't say things he doesn't mean.' The ravenette grumbled to himself as the four left the room and headed to pack. Kanda and Lavi ended up walking with each other in a comfortable silence since their rooms were fairly close. It was strange to not hear the usually talkative rabbit say nothing, Kanda supposed he was lost in thought so he didn't break the silence but that didn't change how strange it was from their norm.

'We're going to India...does Jii-san know about this? Would he approve of me going back there if it was for an assignment? There was a reason...I wasn't supposed to go back there but what was it? Why am I not supposed to go there?' Lavi questioned, his memory was the only thing he took pride in about himself and even that was full of holes and flaws when it came to trying to remember personal details and instructions. A hazy memory was pulled up of a dry landscape and a person standing a few yards in front of him. Their hand was held out towards him but Lavi remembered he refused it. 'Who was that? What happened? Is that person why I'm not supposed to go back to India?' There were so many questions in his head Lavi didn't even recognize where he was by the time he pulled out of flipping through his fogged memories. Kanda was saying something to him, but he couldn't fully make out what it was. His head also hurt, but he didn't remember doing anything aside from thinking.

"Usagi! Are you back from your daze yet?" Kanda growled at the taller male who was seemingly trying to focus on his surroundings. 'What the hell just happened to you.' Kanda wanted to ask but refrained from doing so in order to not sound as worried as he felt.

"Huh? Kanda? Yeah, yeah I'm here. What was happening? Why does my head hurt?" Lavi questioned bringing a hand up to massage a just noticeable bump on his head under his bandana.

"You were so out of it you walked directly into the wall Baka Usagi." Kanda stated flatly, he had watched the whole thing happen, he didn't do anything about it but how could he? That would have ruined his image.

"I walked into the wall? Huh. Oh well, we should get packed so we can meet Allen-kun and Lenalee-chan downstairs before they come up here and start yelling at us ne?" Lavi tried to put up a convincing grin but Kanda could see it didn't reach his eyes. He gave Lavi his signature 'che' before walking off to his own room and leaving the rabbit to sort himself out as he packed for their mission. 'I'll have to be more careful while we're in India, and keep an eye out for whoever that was in my memories.' He sighed as he packed books and journals, some clothing and more things he would need to get done for the panda while he was there. Upon turning back to face the door he caught the eyes of Bookman.

"Lavi, I have been informed that you are headed to India is that correct?" The old man questioned his apprentice with a critical gaze.

"Yeah, Komui wanted us on a mission there I guess, somethin' about Akuma running the place to the ground and possible innocence." Came the response, Lavi knew better than to lie to the old man after all; that was suicide.

"I want you to remember this while you're there: Do not stray into the town of Sirsi. That is all you need to know, am I understood, Lavi?" Bookman questioned, Lavi could tell the man was dead serious and in an effort to be real he nodded instead of giving a verbal confirmation. Bookman nodded back before he left and Lavi headed down to meet the others. New questions popping into his mind that kept him from noticing how unsocial he had suddenly become.

'What happened in Sirsi?' He couldn't help but wonder, he was a Bookman in training after all, why he was told not to go there. There was something he needed to know, even if it meant risking everything in a brand new way.

A/N: And there we have it, the first installment of 49th! So far I'm fairly certain I will be able to keep this fiction afloat with new ideas. Sirsi is a real town in India btw and I will be pulling legitimate facts from there whenever it's needed since I don't really like giving fake information even if it is in fanfiction. Thanks to everyone who read this I hope it wasn't too bland, obviously this will be multi-chapter. I hope to see you all again soon! (Also pray for me I have a Japanese exam today and tomorrow *dies on the inside because I need to sleep but fanfiction*) Thanks again! ~Len-kun