She stared bitter sweetly into a mop of messy black hair flopped onto the floor and nubby horns popping out against lime green carpet, finding yellow eyes buried inside the colors.
"Do you remember?" She asked.
"Remember what, Harley?" The troll sat up and looked at her, his usual annoyed expression melting to curiosity.
She slipped off of her bed and sat beside him, white ears flicking absentmindedly. "How Dave was before I got here. I know you know. You could see our conversations, couldn't you? He wasn't a coolkid. He could open up to me and actually talk. That's the day I met the real Dave."
"Or so you thought." His face reversed itself back into annoyance at the mention of his enemy. This kid hoarded both of his... his crushes. And he hated it with a passion that burned brighter than the Green Sun.
"Exactly. Now that we're together all the time, he's clinging to me in this completely unironic way, even though he denies it. It's like he's showing off to everyone else, and I just add to his act. He tells me every day that I'm his. But that's a thing boyfriends say! He's not my boyfriend, Karkat!" She cradled her head in her hands, elbows digging into the crook of her knees.
His heart skipped a beat; maybe he had a chance with Jade. "And what am I supposed to say to this? Do you want advice or am I just listening?"
"I don't know..! I, do you have any idea what to do?"
"Tell him, stupid. If you don't like being an object and you don't tell him, he won't know and he definitely won't stop."
"But what if I hurt him? What if he thinks we really are dating?"
"That's his problem for falling in love with you, or whatever human flush is." Karkat flopped onto the floor again, resuming his pitiful attempts to become one with the carpet.
"...I guess. But, if I tell him, will I still be able to be his friend? Because I do care about him. I really do love him. It's just... Davesprite wasn't like this," Karkat inwardly cringed at a reminder of Jade's dating history. "I guess he and Dave really are two different people."
"I guess. I mean, he was excited to see you when you got here, so maybe that'll wear off?" What the fuck was he saying?
Jade giggled a little at the thought. "I was gonna hug you, and he pushed you out of the way!"
"You promised me the first hug." This could work. Change the subject. Make her happy.
"I know! I didn't hug him back, though, so it doesn't count!"
"I know. It was worth it." A smug smirk appears.
Eyebrows crease. "Worth what?"
"Not punching John for being a douche." Smug smirks get even more smug.
"Right, I remember you saying tha... Did you punch him anyway, Karkat!?"
Both kids burst into fits of laughter after a moment, rolling on the floor and wiping tears from their eyes.
Later, when the two went to find food, Jade took note of John eating with a black eye, and barely stifled another round of powerful laughter.
—~—
Jade was about to climb into bed to sleep, already in her PJs. She wore them around all the time, anyway. She lifted the sheets with a tired smile until she heard a knock on the door.
Dave entered before she could say anything. "Oh hey, Harley. 'Sup?"
"Uh, not much, really. I was just about to sleep."
"Alright. I was just hoping you could hang?" He said, looking at her almost hopefully.
"Well—"
"Great. Awesome, c'mon." He quickly grabbed her arm and dragged her away. She gazed behind her, to her warm, inviting bed, and frowned.
He dragged her up onto the roof, where he'd set up some movie neither of then gave a shit about on Rose's laptop. Dave must've nabbed it while she wasn't looking. Jade didn't need to be a Seer to know that he'll be in shit about that later.
She had her knees up to her chest, head and arms resting on top, and she was about to doze off. Damn history of narcolepsy. But she snapped wide awake once she felt his arm around her. No, no, no, no, no, no, no nononononononononono... Dave, stop it...
She froze where she was, muscles tense and unmoving. Dave leaned his head down beside hers and smiled. "Hey, no need to be sad. You got me." God, did he really think he was so cool?
She didn't have a chance to respond. He was already leaning down towards her, and she couldn't even react before he was kissing her. She couldn't pull away, she was too terrified, too afraid of hurting him, but she didn't kiss him back. What about Karkat?
Karkat had been coming up the stairs from inside to look for her. He halted once he'd seen the two of them kissing, frozen in his spot. His blood stilled while his thoughts raced, and he could swear his heart broke. He turned on his heels and walked away.
—~—
Dave poked his head into Karkat's wing to find the troll immersed in slime and fast asleep. He didn't care. "Yo Vantas, you seen Terezi?"
Karkat blinked his eyes open, squinting at the light radiating from just outside his door. "Why do you want to know? Aren't you busy with Jade?"
"Well duh, but I can't just leave the matesprit for the girlfriend. Gotta love 'em both." Dave smiled obnoxiously, or so it seemed. Karkat hated it.
"Isn't girlfriend the human version of matesprit?" He asked groggily, knowing he wouldn't enjoy the response.
"Not according to your rants." Look at that; he didn't enjoy the response.
"Yeah, well, you can't have both. It's not fair." Karkat grumbled, wiping stray globs of slime off his chin.
Wait... Girlfriend? Wow, that went right by him.
"To who? You?"
...Jade's not his girlfriend... Dave really does think they're dating.
"Ye— Shut up."
...
Jade wanted to tell Dave on her own.
"You want them? Both? Either or? Tell me more, Karkles." You faintly register him coming inside your respiteblock and closing the door, shrouding you both in darkness.
...Jade wanted to tell him.
Don't. Start. Anything.
"...I'm going back to sleep. Get the fuck out of my room." You decide to avoid conflict. It was probably a smart idea.
The door opens and closes. You slip back underneath the slime and dream.
You remember him saying "Mine." as he left.
—~—
Karkat knocked twice on the library door before entering. Rose and Kanaya were sitting on the couch, each with large books in their laps. Their outer hands turned the pages, and their inner hands disappeared beneath the overlapping book jackets. Ah, left-handed Kanaya.
Or lesbians. Either is possible.
"Rose? Kanaya? Have you seen John?"
Rose calmly replied without looking up from her book. "He's in his bedroom wing I believe, sleeping off the black eye you gave him."
"What? I didn't— ...Never mind. Thanks." Karkat swiftly left the library, leaving the young ladies in peace.
He closed the door behind him, took two steps, and knocked on the one right across the hall. "John? Can I talk to you?"
"Mmmhh... Karkat?" A tired voice and a rustling of sheets came from inside, followed by a gust of wind and the click of a door unlocking. "Yeah, c'mon in..."
Karkat stepped into the dark room, closing the sliver of light behind him, and waited for his eyes to adjust.
"Wha-hhhh..." The boy's sentence was interrupted by a yawn. "What did you need?"
"Just, I guess somebody to talk to, I guess." He plopped down on the floor next to the bed, just as he does with Jade.
"Really, I guess? Okay, I guess, uh, what about?" He could nearly see John sitting up in bed and turning to look at him, smirking lightly. Little fucker's a dick even when he's half asleep. He ignored the fact.
"Well, two things. One's a lot less awkward so I guess I'll start with that... Why does everybody think I punched you? And, how'd you get the black eye?"
"Jade told me you wanted to punch me for whatever reason so I had my glasses off when we were meeting, waiting for it I guess. I walked into a bar sticking out or something. All I know is it hurt."
"I was only joking with her, really. She was saying how you flipped your shit over Con Air and you were a douche to her." He fidgeted uncomfortably. That got out?
"That makes sense. I don't blame you. I kind of am an ass." He yawned again, starting to really wake up. "That answered?"
"Yeah." He was suddenly regretting coming to talk to his crush's brother about his crush. He really didn't want to keep talking, and hoped John forgot...
"What was that other thing?"
Dammit.
"Well... I, uh..."
"Be blunt."
"I'm really close with Terezi and Jade but Dave managed to get both of them with him but Jade isn't his girlfriend even though he thinks she is because Davesprite and time shenanigans and whatever," he pauses to take a breath and think. "What I'm saying is, I like Jade, and I used to like Terezi, but Dave's holding them both like hostages. And, Jade doesn't like it either!"
"Wow."
"Yeah. So... What should I do?"
"I don't know."
"That's really fucking helpful. Thanks, John."
"It's too early for this, Karkat. I'm tired. Beat some sense into Dave or something. I don't care, he laughs at me for the black eye." John flopped back down in his bed, pulling the blankets up around him.
"What a douche. Will do, John. Thanks."
John ignored him like he was already asleep. What a prick.
—~—
"Jade." He raced up to her from behind, where she was in the lounge.
"Jade Jade Jade." He continued when she didn't respond.
"Jade Jade Jade Jade Jade.
Jade!
OH MY GOD, JADE!" That got old quick.
John tapped her shoulder, waved in her face, poked her sides, and ended up flopping across her lap before getting her attention. God, she was either really out of it today or messing around.
"Huh? Oh, hi John. What do you need?" He really hoped she was playing. What if she wasn't? What was on her mind?
"I need to warn you about something. You know Dave and Karkat hate each other?" He rolled off of her lap and sat across from her, blowing hair out of his face to a worried expression.
"Oh geez, are they in the hatey troll thing?" Her face contorted into mock horror.
"This is serious! Listen to me, okay?" The wind around them started to move, making their hair sway gently in the wind.
"Fine, what is it?" She brushed her bangs out of her face smoothly, ears twitching.
"Dave likes you."
"I noticed."
The wind picked up along with his frustration. "Be serious, will you?"
"I am! Just tell me, geez."
John sighed, exhaling a wisp of light blue. Jade cocked an eyebrow, growing impatient. "Karkat likes you too."
"...What?"
"Yeah. It's gonna cause problems. Rose told me how they act, and according to Kanaya it's like the kismay-... Kissmussessee-... The hate one."
"He likes me?"
"Uh, yeah. I thought we moved on from that."
"Right, sorry!"
"Anyway... So it's gonna cause a problem."
"No, no, right. Yeah okay."
"...So then Rose and Kanaya are doing research on whatever they're supposed to be, and I bet you're not even listening, so I'm just saying the most random things to check if you really are, because you're not. Am I right?"
"Right!"
Wow.
"Yeah, okay. Anyway, you like Karkat, don't you?"
"Sure, yep!" She still wasn't listening.
"You totally like Karkat and you want his weird alien bulge. You want it all to yourself, and you're not gonna deny it, are you?"
"Yep yep!"
"Are you even lis—"
"Uh-huh!
"Jade."
"What?"
"Nevermind."
"No, John, tell me." Her expression changed, seeming worried.
"You weren't listening, is all. I'm trying to say they both hate each other and both love you. What are you gonna do?"
Jade's face went blank. "I... I don't know. I mean, Dave is kind of really possessive and all, and Karkat is really sweet to me. I'm not sure if either are acting like their real selves around me. But, I guess if I had to pick..."
"Well?"
"I kind of like Karkat. Just a little..."
"Well, pick Karkat then. Simple, right?"
"I guess. Thanks for telling me, John. You're the best brother I never had before!"
They both burst into giggling fits and moved on to lighter subjects.
—~—
It seemed that over the past few days, Dave and Karkat had been getting more tense. It was bound to break out soon, and they'd be going for each other's throats.
"Soon" turned out to be today.
It happened when nobody else was around. Rose and Kanaya were doing research, John was napping, and God knows where Gamzee or Terezi was. Were? Was? Whatever.
Karkat was back in Jade's room, lying on the floor. Her head was on his stomach, and both stared at the ceiling as she played with the tiny stars and swirled her planets around. They talked about everything, from Alternia to Halley. Soon they fell silent.
"..."
"..."
"So..." She mumbled.
They both knew what was on her mind.
"Did you tell Dave yet?"
"No, I—"
Click.
"Tell me what?" Black shades appeared in the gap the doorway as it slid open.
"Strider! What the fuck, were you listening?" Karkat was on his feet and in Dave's face immediately. Jade was still sitting up.
"Should I have been? What were you guys talking about?" He snapped right back, towering over Karkat.
"Dave, I—" Jade stood helplessly as the two boys faced off.
"No! It's not your fucking business what we talk about, so get your fucking nose out of our business!"
"Kar—" Jade was cut off again.
"I heard my name, so I wanna know whats going on." Dave sneered, nostrils flaring, and stood straight up at his full height, as if to intimidate the small troll.
"That's not your fucking business!" Karkat's hair stood up on end and he bared his teeth, yellow eyes and yellow fangs looking more deadly and menacing than ever before.
"Karkat—" This time, Jade's words died in her throat.
"Is she cheating on me with you?"
Dave barely got the words out of his mouth before the troll had him on the ground with a snarl, claws positioned at his throat and already drawing blood.
"SHE IS NOT CHEATING ON YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT HERS TO CHEAT ON! SHE'S NOT YOURS! YOU'RE NOT HERS! YOU ARE NOT DATING! NOT BOYFRIEND-GIRLFRIEND, NOT MATESPRITS, NOTHING!"
Dave shades were swatted into a wall, revealing wide, bright red eyes that contrasted deathly pale skin. Karkat raised his hand to strike again, but he was pulled away with surprising force. Jade was staring him in the eyes, holding him back with the same levitating force she used on her planets. Their gazes locked intensely for just a moment before he was moving away from Jade and plopped onto her bed. He stayed frozen to his spot, shrinking into his sweater as she turned to face Dave. She knelt down in front of him, skirt settling softly to the ground, and when she looked at him, her gaze was soft and mildly upset. This kept Dave in his place just as Karkat was, being more afraid of her pity than her wrath.
"I do love you, Dave. But I don't want to be treated like an object. I don't want to be with you when you do that to me. I love you, but I'd rather be with... Somebody else... Somebody else who doesn't know it." She turned her head to glance back at Karkat, frozen on her bed. His bloodpusher stopped for much more than the two seconds it would take to cease blood flow and kill him.
Both boys were speechless.
"I really hope we can still be friends after this, Dave," she said, turning back to the blonde. "because I do still like you! It's just... I guess I like Karkat more." She paused for a moment, looking unsure and upset. "Are you gonna be okay..?"
He nodded slowly, stood up more slowly, and left. The door closed behind him with a click.
Karkat blinked. "That... went well."
"Yeah."
There was a moment of awkward silence, as expected.
"So, uh... You like me too?" He asked nervously.
"Yeah..."
He didn't figure she wanted to talk right now, but she would at sometime.
He was surprised.
"John told me." She mumbled.
"I'm not surprised. But I guess it's for the best, right?"
"Yeah."
Another awkward silence.
"So."
Jade sat down softly in her bed beside the troll. "So..."
"Uh... Jade?"
"Mhm?"
"Do you want to, uh, maybe watch a movie with me sometime?" His cheeks lit up brighter than his supposed god tier.
"Sure, when?"
"Why not now?"
"I'd like that."
He rose off the bed and she followed, smiling softly. They made their way from her room to his respiteblock, twining their fingers together along the way.
As soon as his door was closed she stopped, tugging gently on his hand. He turned around to find her face inches from his and getting closer. He froze for half a second, panicking internally, before noticing the determined glint in her eyes. He took a deep breath, closed the distance, and their lips locked.
He'd finally gotten what he wanted, all in one night. He'd gotten the girl he flushed for, he'd gotten Strider off of his back(Dave wasn't interested in a kissmessitude anyway), and he'd helped his friend with her not-quite-relationship problems. And there was almost no violence, as a plus. He could finally relax and be happy, for a change.
They continued to kiss, slowly and sweetly, until Jade started to lean in further, pushing Karkat backwards. He didn't notice, too absorbed in the kiss, until he fell back onto the floor. Jade started to giggle as he turned a bright red, then got down on the floor to face him. He turned towards her, still blushing a bit, but smiled.
"Hey, Jade?" When he spoke, his voice was soft.
"Hmm?" She studied his eyes, how the yellow seemed so soft and inviting when he wasn't angry. It seemed cliche, but she really wanted to stare into them forever and find every way they were beautiful.
"Do you think... Maybe you... Do you want to... Fuck." It took him a few tries to find the right phrase, and to get it out completely. "Will you be my matesprit..?"
Jade smiled sweetly at him. But just to tease his troll vernacular, she asked him on response "Will you be my boyfriend?" The word felt odd on her tongue, but she could get used to saying it more.
"Of course." And then she was smiling and kissing him again, wrapping her arms around his neck.
Things were definitely going to be okay.