Also not to sure about ratings yet but I think it will be an Fiction Rating M
P.S this isn't a one shot ( obviously ) hoping to have chapter 2 up soon! Please R&R
Disclaimer: please don't sue me I am just borrowing you creations for mine, and hopefully others, enjoyment. I own nothing especially JA/Alec : (
Like a Pheonix
Chapter one
"I just, I can't do this anymore Logan. Constantly be around you knowing that I could kill you if I sneeze in the wrong direction or trip onto you."
"Well really Max how often do you trip"
Logan was trying to add a little lightness to the conversation, Max new it, but this was not the right time at all. She was serious about this and had to make him see that this is what was for the best for him. But there was a small part of her that was doing this for herself too, I mean how long can a girl subject herself to a doomed relationship filled with heartache, angst and guilt. It was just too much for her to keep going on with, she couldn't take it anymore.
She didn't, however, want to tell Logan that because it wasn't his fault that everything had gotten so screwed up but if he knew how she really felt she knew he would take it that way. But it seemed, with the way he just wasn't getting this that she may have to eventually tell him, but not until she knew she had no choice. For now she would keep trying to get through to him.
Logan, this is serious and you know it, why can't you just let go. I leave, tell you we're over and you call or I end up back here and we go back right where we started, with you in danger." He looked hurt at that, and she realised that the way she had said that made it seem like she was blaming him.
"Logan I didn't mean it that way, this isn't your fault it's just how am I supposed to walk away if you don't let me go?"
"Max, I can"t just let you walk away, let you give up like this, we will find the cure and then we can be together" The look on his face gave no question as to the fact that he truly believed in what he was saying. 'arggh , well you knew this wasn't going to be easy!' she thought to herself.
"I'm not giving up on anything. If we found the cure that would be amazing we could have dates, and dance and kiss and all the things a 'normal' couple gets to do" she said, emphasising the world normal "but until then we aren't a normal couple are we? If we ever find the cure then I will get it, I'll risk my life for it, but - until then - do we really keep doing this, being around each other knowing what could happen. Knowing that we can't have what it is that we really want, putting your life in danger?"
"Max..." Logan started, but she cut in.
"All the pain and the guilt and frustration of not being able to touch without you keeling over on me. It isn't fair Logan, not to you and not to me!"
He looked at her then with a face that made her want to just run right outta there, sighed and said "Well I'm sorry that I've been such a burden to you" and looked away, back towards his computers.
At that she snapped "OH FOR GODS SAKE LOGAN" His head turned back around to her with a look of pure surprise at her outburst but she didn't have the willpower left to feel bad about startling him. This needed to be said, now!
"This isn't just about you" She said, aware that she was shouting at a volume that was not necessary given that he was about two meters from her, but continued non the less "I get that this is hard for you , I do and I'm sorry but it's hard on me too why can't you see that. You may be willing to risk dying but I am not willing to risk being the one that kills you. If you loved me at all then you would let me do this, let me leave and spare me all of this pain!" and with that she turned and walked away, out of the penthouse.
She had left for three reasons, one, she didn't want to see that hurt look in his eyes, two she didn't want him to see the tears brimming in her eyes and three she had to leave now if she wanted some time on the needle ( desperately needed time ) before she had to go meet the guys at crash like she had promised. So she hopped on her baby and headed towards the edge of sector three, towards the space needle, towards peace of mind.
Reviews welcome!!!!!!!!!!!