A/N: A little different. I hope. At least in the pairing.
I seem to have taken a liking for song-based fiction with lyrics in it; if you don't like lyrics, please feel free to ignore them and treat them as scene breaks.
This is an AU piece based on what might have happened if Tonks had actually been in love with Sirius Black. Just me playing a little.
-- -- --
Sirius Black was tired of being alone. Sure he had his old friend Remus back, but that wasn't the same as what his heart truly desired. After a year hiding, recovering his mind and soul as much as his body, it was a harsh trick that he was shoved back into his family home- a home that he despised, feeling the evil and lack of love pour through its very walls to torment him.
That had been what started the drinking and moping. He was at his lowest yet; not even in Azkaban had he felt this discomforted. A shudder passed through him as he sat in the kitchen waiting for the visitor his cousin Andromeda had promised him. When he had contacted the woman to tell her the Order was once again in place, she had declined the offer to rejoin, but did say she had someone who could easily take her place. Unfortunately, Sirius remembered his cousin's sole child- bright eyed girl, wild hair styles. No grace at all. He highly suspected he would take one look at Nymphadora Tonks and decline her as a member; on the other hand, it was nice to have company, even for a short while. The full moon was tonight, leaving him alone with his memories...
Which is what had started him drinking tonight in particular. When the doorbell rang at eight pm, unsteady steps took him towards the door and past the bloody picture that had started screaming about blood-traitors and freaks. Sirius took a moment to shut his mother's form up before opening the door. The sight that greeted him, however, was not what he had suspected.
She had on a simple pair of darkest blue denim jeans and a pristine collared top in deep gray. Her hair was pitch black, hanging just below her ears in a seductively sleek bob. "Sirius?" she asked calmly. "I'm Nym.."
"Dora?" Sirius breathed out gently, stricken back. He'd expected the gangly girl to grow up into a punk and a klutz, not this model of professional aurorism before his eyes.
"Just off work," she explained sheepishly. "Figured I'd come right over instead of changing."
Sirius nodded dumbly at her, a smile still plastered to his face. "I appreciate it."
"Mum said to give her regards when I stopped by," she noted, taking a step in. Sirius moved to the side, allowing her entrance...
Only to catch her as she tripped harshly over the troll-foot umbrella stand. She wiggled under his touch, smiling.
"You ARE still a klutz," Sirius chuckled.
"Guilty." At that, her hair shortened into spikes and changed to bright bubblegum pink. "I'm a metamorphmagus. Kind of goes with the territory. Body always changing and the like."
She'd managed to become an auror, Sirius reminded himself. The least he could do was give her a chance. The Order so desperately needed help...
And something told Sirius that maybe, just maybe, he needed her.
-- - -- --
Sick and Tired of this world
There's no more air
Trippin' over myself
Goin' nowhere
Waiting
Suffocating
No direction
And I took a dive and...
-- -- --
With Tonks' help, Sirius was slowly recovering his prowess with a wand. She was patient with their practice sessions, remembering acutely that he hadn't had a wand in 12 years and was unlikely to remember combat right off. He proved an apt pupil, just as wandplay showed to be much simpler than riding a bike as muggles would put it. It kept them in close quarters, which neither seemed too likely to protest...
"Are you ready?" Tonks whispered. "I mean, I know it is simple, but..."
"I'm ready," Sirius assured. "Only a boggart, after all."
"How did your house get infested with boggarts, Sirius?"
Siri just shrugged, wand at the ready, and the two entered the room where tell-tale thumping thundered. The boggart came to meet them, looking suspiciously like...
"Tonks!" Sirius screamed. But she too was paralyzed at the sight of such a nasty dementor as it advanced on Sirius, howling... it was already brushing against his skin before Tonks managed to get out a breathy "ridikulus."
Sudddenly, the dementor sprouted sunglasses and a pink afro. Sirius burst into laughter, and Tonks let out a sigh of relief as they bound the creature and sent it packing into the night.
"So." Sirius cocked his head oddly at Tonks as they stepped down the stairs. "We have the same fear, then?" When she could only nod, Sirius asked the needed follow-up. "Any reason an auror is afraid of a dementor?"
"I... you..." She could only sigh. "It would put someone I love very much in danger."
Sirius stalled. Dementors putting someone in danger? "Who?"
Tonks turned to him, and her arms found their way around his waist as her lips sought his. The kiss was gentle, tentative, and caressing. Sirius found himself moderately surprised even as she broke off blushing furiously from toe to the edge of her now beet-red hair, a whisper of, "You," on her breath.
Sirius pulled away with a shudder. "Is this where I bring up the fact that we're relatives, the fact that I'm much older than you, or the fact that I'm a wanted criminal?"
Tonks sighed. "I don't care about any of those things."
Sirius let out a sigh, cautiously suggesting "Maybe I do, Dora."
Deflated, Nymphadora Tonks stepped down the stairs alone with a simple "I don't give up" on her lips.
Sirius' eyes followed the young auror down the stairs longingly until a tap on his shoulder brought the last Black back into reality. On the other end of that hand was Remus Lupin; Sirius jumped almost a mile. Remus had a strange smile on his face, sad yet sure...
"If you don't accept that girl's offer," the former professor commented, "I will."
Sirius laughed. "I'm sure you would, Moony."
"At least give it some thought? She sounded very genuine..."
"All the more reason for me to head her off."
"You need something to hold on to Sirius. She's good for you. You realize you haven't dipped a firewhiskey bottle back since you met her?"
Sirius paused. "I haven't?"
"No."
"Hmm."
Sirius had the strange, horrible sensation that his best friend might be onto something. Unwilling to face that, he rushed bak upstairs, locking himself securely in his room. But there the thoughts came at him rapidly, unwilling to dissipate. Tonks. And him. Happy.
It could work.
-- -- --
On the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
On the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held onto you
-- -- --
Tonks had arrived right on time for defense training every week since their uncomfortable exchange on the stariwell, and Sirius was quite moved by her new lessons. She helped him regain his technique now, showing how she carressed and gently moved her wand in just the right ways, and wouldn't he show HER now...
Not to mention the fact t-shirts disappeared now, instead given low-cut tank tops and tighter jeans. More and more she allowed him to see her preferred form: pink hair, short so that nothing could get tangled, and a petite body that could hardly get in anybody's way. And he liked it. A lot.
He had also started showering right after every lesson. Cold showers.
Still, he found her more stubborn than he had thought possible. Even that couldn't stop her working; with the war going, she was proving a very capable auror in the field as well as an Order member, and the stories she told gripped his heart with fear that was more than strictly friendly.
Sirius Black had always enjoyed freedom and women in the past. Freedom was taken away, but the woman...
Tonks meant too much for him to use her infatuation, though. No, not an infatuation... a love. An honest love, that was what he felt from her...
Sirius watched her from across the room as she slept on the couch, her head resting on Remus Lupin's lap. Both had fallen asleep long ago, and Sirius was jealousof his best friend for being so near to the young girl. Even when he reminded himself that he had let her go...
I don't give up easily.
"And I love you for it," Sirius breathed lightly. With that, he felt immediately lighter, happier for just saying it out loud. He had fallen in love with her. It was in the air now, never to return, and that was the best sensation he had ever felt in his lifetime.
-- -- -- -- --
I've been wondering why
It's only me
Have you always been inside
Waiting to breathe
It's alright
Sunlight
On my face
I wake up and yeah
-- -- -- --
The cry could be heard throughout the house: Harry Potter is entering the Ministry. Sirius Black ran to aide, fearful as his name was used to bring his godson into that place, into a battle...
Only to find that a small group was already there. First among them was Tonks, holding on to Remus' hand and squeezing hard as if it were a lifeline. Sirius found his heart skip lightly, and a strong desire to tell her everything. Unfortunately, there was no time as the battle started and everyone was forced to choose their opponents.
Sirius had been prepared for his cousin in his mind, feeling he was owed much by the black witch Bellatrix. Yet it was Tonks who arrived first, who raised her wand to the female in preparation, battling to the end as if her life fully depended on the outcome. And as Sirius thought about it, it was indeed Tonks that Bella would have the most grudge with of the Order, even above himself.
Dueling his own Death Eater, Sirius kept only a single ear out for any calamity. It happened long after he had been prepared for, in the form of a pathetic squeel from Tonks. Sirius turned to see her slip down a stair, quickly using an apparate in spite of the danger of being caught...
He caught her, steadying the young auror so that she took just a short tumble- less than when she tripped on the umbrella stand even. Bellatrix cackled gleefully at the new development.
"A mudblood and a blood-traitor. I'm so lucky!"
"Just hold on to me," Sirius whispered into the ear beside him. Tonks nodded shortly, stretching her aching muscles and letting Sirius slip in front of her. Just as he did, whispering a spell, a glimmer of light shot from Bellatrix's wand. Tonsk shuddered, but felt nothing from whatever her aunt had thrown at the duo before her. Slowly, she backed down the step, guiding Sirius so that he could follow without breaking the protection from Bella's curse.
It was when they reached the bottom they flanked her, one after another; grudgingly, Sirius had to admit some respect for his cousin's fighting style. Even if it was dirty and evil.
Bella managed to shove them further and further from safety until they had backed up to the stand where the veil stood. Tonks chose not to be afraid, at least not until the green streak came by...
Sirius dodged, but backward. He began to trip completely, falling into the veil...
Tonks' pull was stronger. She shoved him out of the way, closer to herself. With a scream, Bellatrix felt the sting of a curse shoot behind her as more activity began. Sirius, however, stilled, looking at his unusal saving grace: an auror with pink hair, who was looking at him with a gentle smile and determination behind her eyes.
"No time to chat," she whispered.
For once, Sirius could immediately agree she was right.
-- -- -- -- -- -- --
I'm alive
'cause on the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
On the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held onto you
-- -- --
Sirius found himself in a unique position when the battle was over, and the ministry again cleared up. He was in front of Fudge, out in the open, as Dumbledore explained how a fugitive such as himself wound up part of the Order of the Phoenix. He was not, however, standing there uncomfortably. Instead he was laying on the floor, his head resting lightly on Tonks' lap. She ran fingers through his hair, relishing the straggly curls as they brushed against her fingers. She sighed contentedly, and Sirius felt his heart leap in delight at her sigh.
"Sirius," she whispered, "I think they're going to let you be."
Sirius smiled a puppy grin. "Glad to hear."
"You know, I owe you one for the stairs."
Sirius couldn't even be frightened or mad anymore about what had happened. It had given him a reason, an opening, to tell her, "Thank you as well. Without you, who knows where I'd have ended up."
"On... the other side of the veil." Tonks had such a catch in her voice that the proud Black knew she would forever have a new boggart.
"Not just that," he explained. "Everything. Dora... I love you. And without you I would have crashed long ago."
Tonks let a light enter her eyes. "Do you mean it?"
Sirius stood. "Excuse me, everyone?" A few turned towards him. "I am Sirius Black, and I love Nymphadora Tonks."
A few laughs, some hesitant others just gentle out of respect, and no shortage of grumbling eyes turned toward the two as Sirius sat back down and reclined onto her supportive shoulder.
It was only moments later, while Tonks was still squeezing him close and whsipering into his ear, that the minister came forward and offered his sincere apologies for everything that Sirius had been through. "You are a free man, Mister Black."
It was the second best words either Tonks or Sirius had ever heard.
-- -- -- --
I was so afraid
Of going under
But now
The weight of the world
Feels like nothing, no, nothing
-- -- --
It would go down as perhaps the hardest year either Tonks or Sirius had ever known. They were happy, and in love, and yet so far apart. Both had agreed that their work with the Order was more important than anything else; due to this, Tonks moved to Hogsmeade to take over sweeps of the area, both as an auror and an Order ember. Sirius, on the other had, found himself retaining the planning and strategy that he always had within the fighters. It was tricky, and he was alone much of the time...
Leaving him to train himself to go against Bellatrix again. She had escaped during the battle, disappearing without a trace; he wanted to be ready when she once again came for him. And Tonks. When he wasn't practicing, he was reading up on spells to defeat her. The dedication level was impressive.
Tonks would use some of her days off to come to him, laughing and resting and kissing. They were happiest together. In time, Tonks even noticed her own heart thrown into upheaval, her joy causing her patronus to change ton a gentle black dog that nuzzled her before rushing off to do what was needed. Because every happy thought was Sirius, everything that she fought for was in him.
And Sirius found it yet another reason to love her.
It was a lonely year, but both came out of it ready... prepared. And leaning on each other, they came out whole.
-- -- -- --
Down, down, down
You're all I wanted
Down, down, down
You're all I needed
Down, down, down
You're all I wanted
You're all I needed
-- -- --
"He was so happy we were together," Tonks lamented, her usual pink hair subdued somewhat, her arms around Sirius' waist.
"He always enjoyed seeing there was more love in the world." Sirius kissed her forehead lightly, feeling her cheer in his hold.
"I can't believe he's gone," Remus noted from behind the couple, a sad look in his eye.
"It was inevitable. Always knew Snape was a baddy."
Tonks listened, nodding- but not committing to the answer. It didn't feel right, though she might never know why. And at that, it hardly mattered. Dumbledore was dead, and Snape had caused that in the end. Yet love prevailed. She still felt light, free...
As Sirius squeezed her tighter, she knew that was all she would ever need.
-- --
And I won't forget the way you loved me
All that I wanted
All that I needed
-- -- --
"Harry asked you to what?"
Sirius blushed. "He was given a secret errand by Dumbledore. He needs a place to be, and I offered him Grimmauld. And myself."
Tonks sighed. "You believe Harry needs you more than I do?"
"Yes."
The answer came quickly, but whispered- an admittance he didn't want to make. Sirius loved her deeply, but this...this was for the good of the entire world. "I can't be selfish," Tonks decided out loud. "I have to let you go."
"Where will you..?"
"My mother will need protection. I will see to it, my love."
Sirius kissed her passionately, deeply, tears lighting his eyes. "I..."
"You aren't sorry," Tonks assured. "Sad, but not sorry. We WILL meet again, or I swear I will hunt you down!"
Sirius laughed, wiping the water from his eyes. "You be careful as well."
Gently, Tonks scratched behind his ear and brushed his cheek. "I love you."
"I love you, too."
-- --
On the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
On the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held onto you
-- -- --
"Where's Sirius?"
"Last I saw, he was dueling Bellatrix. But I'm sure..."
Tonks' feet flew as her wand shot spells to allow her safe passage, her hunt continuing. No need to know where she was going; Bella's cruel laughter and a set of screams would tell her where to be. She was ready, too; Sirius had been looking up a lot of information and funneling it to her. They were both prepared, but Tonks knew her aunt was no witch to be fighting alone.
She found them in the furthest halls of Hogwarts, Sirius shielding a cruciatus as Bellatrix cackled maniacally. The defense was about to break, and Tonks knew that she had to act very quickly. With a deep breath, she prepared herself...
"Picking on a pup, aunty?"
Sirius paused at the voice, and Bellatrix turned her attentions away. "Ah, my little niece. Decided to be the dog's bitch I see?"
Tonks let her cheeks go red, her hair changing to a pitch black. "You can't goad me, Bella. I already want to see you defeated more than anything."
Bellatrix laughed. "Show me what you have then, auror."
Sirius had closed his eyes, disappointed that Tonks had cut in to hte fight and put herself in danger, but the pink-haired witch ignored his displeasure and focused on sending out a spell before Bella could catch her off guard with one of her own. It hit just short of the mark, tripping Bellatrix up instead of knocking her flat.
It was enough of an opening.
Sirius slid behind the death eater, wand at the ready. Together, he and Tonks bound Bellatrix tightly until the screams were not in ecstasy but desperate calls for aide from her allies. Sadly, all Death Eaters were quite busy.
"We did it," Tonks sighed happily, seeing her aunt struggling against her bonds. "How did you..?"
"I heard her when she... Tonks, she killed Fred Weasley."
The young girl bowed her head. "Fine young fellow, too," she lamented.
Sirius hugged her close, and the two looked over their captive. "That was a bit of a strain," Sirius noted.
"We should help the others," Tonks noted. "Still plenty of fighting to be done."
Sirius nodded. "I have a question for you first, Dora. If we both make it out of this, want to get married?"
"Is this really the time?"
Even as Tonks' words left, a cry went up from the Great Hall. "Harry did it! He won! Voldemort is defeated!"
Bellatrix screamed out painfully, harshly; Tonks found it among her favorite sounds- even as Sirius whispered into her ear, "I think it's the perfect time, my love."
-- -- -- - --
Down, down, down
But I held onto you
Down, down, down
But I held onto you