Unperfect
"We are coming to you live from the Spectre recognition ceremony where, in just a few short minutes, the council will begin promoting the best of the best N7 soldiers who put everything on the line in the fight against the reapers. Such illustrious names as Justicar Vida and Warlord Kameer rub shoulders with relative unknowns, who have proved themselves worthy on the field of combat. It is only fitting that this occasion takes place on the anniversary of V-day, the final day of the reaper wars where the Human Spectre Commander Sheperd gave their life to end the war….it appears our first guest is arriving and it looks like the Vorcha rep….." The screen shut off with a blink.
"Relative Unknown!?" Exclaimed the woman in blood red armour, stroking her golden hair from her glistening blue eyes, "Bet that bitch has never been to Omega" She shot a piercing crystal stare at her Quarian comrade.
"I think there are enough bitches on Omega already" The Quarian replied staring into the darkness on the screen, fidgeting with the rim of her purple hood. "And all of them are better known than you" The blonde woman smirked, before leaning forward and rapping her fingers on the dark glass barrier in front of them.
"Hey Driver" The barrier faded to reveal the Turian sat at the wheel paying intense concentration to the way ahead. "I'm hungry"
"There is a minibar available, Miss Minnows"
"I don't want any of that fancy low dextro crap, I want meat, Varren"
"I'm sorry Miss Minnows but I have orders to take you straight to the ceremony"
"Fine, let's get this over with, I'm fucking starving"
"You doo realise you're being made a spectre, you could treat it with a little more respect" The Quarian interjected stealing a pack of sweets from the minibar and tucking them into her suit. "You deserve it after Thessia"
"You were there aswell, so what about you?"
"I didn't punch a Reaper"
"To death" The woman grinned slouching back into her chair and flicking the television back on with her omni-tool.
"You Viscount Krhar of the Vorcha, ahem, empire are hereby honoured with Spectre status. Your duty will be to the council above all else, you will answer to us and us alone, and may take any measures deemed necessary to get the job done." The Turian councillor spoke with a grimace, his hands placed firmly behind his back, apart from the air quotes of course.
"This is indeed an honour and you are the first of your kind to bear it" The Salarian councillor added enthusiastically.
"Perhaps we'll soon see another saviour of the Galaxy" Joked the Asari councillor, glancing over at the human Councillor Hackett.
"Please report to the Citadels restricted docks where a new ship and crew will be waiting for you" Hackett added professionally
"You honour me your majesties" Krhar hissed spinning on his heels, his ceremonial cape twirling as he did.
"Why do we need to make one of his 'race' a Spectre" The Turian lamented when Krhar was firmly out of earshot.
"Because it shows we are a progressive council, we honour each of the races that participated in the Reaper wars, it's called politics you should be aware of it" Hackett spoke wryly with a slight grin upon his face.
"I understand giving this status to citadel races even the Krogan deserve one or two but but them?"
"Would you rather have them on the council?"
"The next person in here better not be a Rachni"
"She's human, one of our finest, she used to be a member of the Talon Mercenary Group on Omega"
"A 'Criminal'"
"She managed to take down a reaper destroyer with only a Quarian, Krogan and an Elcor. If there is anyone who truly deserves to become a Spectre today, it's her"
"Well then I guess nobody 'deserves' to become a Spectre then" The Turian councillor hissed.
"Am I interrupting?" Minnows shouted as she skipped up the steps into the council chambers, "I can come back later if you want, after all how often does a once in a lifetime opportunity come around"
"No Miss Minnows you're quite welcome" Hackett responded proudly.
"Please, call me the Bitch"
"I'd rather not" The Asari councillor promptly protested.
"Why would we ever call you 'The Bitch'" The Turian councillor asked, making use of his fondly loved air quotes.
"Same reason you're making me a Spectre, I punched a Reaper to death" The councillors took pause, even Hackett appeared in disbelief.
"You punched a Reaper..."
"To death"
"You mean your punched a vital component causing the reaper to malfunction?" The Salarian councillor added attempting to make sense of what he had just heard.
"Nope, just ran up and..." The Bitch made a clicking sound with the corner of her mouth as she mimed her heroic actions.
"Very well" Councillor Hackett declared interrupting the silence. "We hereby grant you Spectre status, you will answer to this council and this council alone, and you are permitted to whatever means necessary to get the job done"
"You may report to the Citadel's restricted docks where a new ship and crew will be waiting for you" The Asari councillor explained.
"I'll provide my own field squad but I'll take the rest of that shit" The Bitch claimed. The Salarian councillor cleared his throat.
"Very well, from this day forth you, Jessica Minnows AKA...The Bitch, shall be a Spectre. Your ship is waiting for you"
"Thanks but there's a little detour I need to make first"
"Make it snappy, you'll recieve your first assignment when you get to your ship" Hackett commanded as The Bitch merrily skipped down the stairs.
"She 'punched' a Reaper?"
"To Death"
"Yeah, sure she did buddy" The Salarian C-Sec officer taunted as he forced the Krogan into the holding cell.
"Yuh-Huh, and she just became a Spectre, so she'll show up any minute to bust me out"
"Well my daddy just built a Reaper, so if you go anywhere it'll blast you" the Human officer mocked as he sat at his desk.
"Yeah, and she'll punch it to death" The Krogan barked hopping onto his bunk
"You guys have got to hear this" Shouted the Turian officer as he marched a struggling Quarian into the prison block. "Caught this one stealing Cerberus technology from a secure vault"
"Quarians"
"Guess what she told me?"
"What?"
"Her friend and CO just became a Spectre...for punching a Reaper"
"To death?"
"Yeah, how'd you know?" The human officer simply pointed at the Krogan in the cell.
"Hey M.T" The Quarian shouted.
"Sup" Replied the Krogan with a curt nod.
"She'll be down here in no time, just you wait" The Quarian declared aas she stumbled into the cell. "So M.T, did you already tell them?"
"Yeah but for some reason they don't believe me"
"Sceptics"
"Alright!" the Human officer shouted jumping from his chair "You two better stop talking about this mutual friend, who might I add will never bust you out, before I fudge this paperwork and lock you up for life"
"Hey Human what's that phrase, speak of the Devil and She appears?" the Krogan muttered.
"So I'm the Devil now am I?" The Bitch cried jumping to the bottom of the stairs.
"And we your humble demons" M.T responded, a wide grin lighting his face.
"So you're the Spectre that punched a Reaper?" The Salarian asked sarcastically.
"To death" The Bitch added "It's always more impressive when you add to death"
"I'll keep that in mind"
"To death" The Turian said, invoking laughter in his colleagues.
"These two are mine, M.T and Holi."
"These two aren't going anywhere, unless you can post their bail, and even then I'm not so sure"
"But I'm a Spectre"
""Please stand in front of the scannner and we'll see if that's true" The Human officer said gesturing to the DNA scanner on his desk. The Bitch strolled past the Turian and Salarian and their imposing glares, and hopped into place in front of the scanner. "OK, Jessica Minnows"
"Call me The Bitch"
"No, Jessica Minnows, 36, Blonde hair, Blue eyes yadda yadda oh...Shit"
"Hmmm" The Bitch grinned slyly
"Spectre status recognised" The human officer leant back in his chair, stroked his hands through his short black hair, sighed deeply and closed his eyes regretfully. "Free the prisoners"
"Free my field squad" The human officer nodded to his colleagues, who quickly ushered Holi and M.T from their cells.
"Where's your daddy now?" M.T mocked as he followed his commander up the stairs, away from the cell block. The Turian officer approached his co-workers at the desk.
"Do you Really think She punched a Reaper to death?"
The Bitch stepped into the elevator followed closely by her newly freed crew.
"So Holi what was it this time?"
"Cerberus turret"
"Do you still have it?"
"The parts I wanted"
"M.T"
"Hmm"
"What did you do?"
"I'll give you one guess"
"Starting a fight?"
"More like finishing it"