Chapter one
His laugh arose through the noises of happy villagers, it was heard all the way to the booth where the somewhat more calm teachers both had taken a place. Iruka had heard it too and chuckled.
"I'd tell him to calm down, but I can't bring myself. What he did today was fantastic. He has the right to be a little loud and obnoxious."
Kakashi mumbled something, looked down on the smooth surface of the table, worn down from hundreds and hundreds of plates and hands and glasses and wishes and elbows that took the weight of heads heavy with despair. He felt a little tug at his consciousness, Iruka eyed him, now concerned.
"Are you alright?"
He felt the need to respond, to make out an excuse that seemed somewhat credible.
"I'm just a little tired. I guess I'm getting old..." and smiled a humble smile as if to say that he didn't believe it himself but he wouldn't mind if the other man agreed. Iruka smiled too, knowingly, that neither believed it, went along with the ploy for the sake of simplicity, didn't want to burst the bubble by inquiring.
"I can't believe how much of his father he has become. He has grown so much." Iruka paused, as if to test the friendly ice between them, to see if it would hold before he continued. Kakashi didn't add to the conversation, felt the control over his thoughts slowly diminish, knew that if he opened his mouth right now he'd surely regret it in one way or another.
Another glance in his direction told him that Iruka thought he was acting strange, he didn't care, at least pretended not to. He could think whatever he wanted.
"You know, you should be proud. He looks up to you a great deal. Of course he'd never say so himself, but I know he does. I can see it. He listens to you."
Kakashi snorted.
"Well not always, but most of the time anyway."
He looked away, had nothing to say, clenched his jaw, wished Iruka could get to the bloody point so he could go home without being rude. He had no intention of making this a night out. He wanted to get back to his bed, to the calm and silence.
"You practically raised him. As I said, you should be proud."
Was he drunk? He might be. He counted the glasses next to him. Three. Hm. Whatever he said next was the important thing, he knew him so well, could sense it on him like the scent of spring one sudden winter day.
"I think he-"
"Iruka-sensei!"
Damn it, you… He didn't need to look up to know who it was that had joined them, he would have known the presence anywhere, was so acutely aware of him. Naruto never seemed to acknowledge the elephant in the room, probably because nine times out of ten, he was the elephant.
"Iruka-sensei" he repeated, just like a child who wanted to be sure that their parents were listening. The other man grinned, was so proud, if he had been annoyed to get interrupted he did his best not to show it.
"I heard that was quite some battle out there."
"Yeah, I wasn't sure I could do it at first. They were quite strong."
Kakashi had been looking up politely, like it was expected of him, their eyes met for a while.
Please don't-
"Kakashi helped as well."
Don't.
This was embarrassing.
"Oh, I barely did anything. You deserve all the honour."
Naruto looked disgruntled, about to argue, his usual expression. By now he knew them so well...
"I'm a little worn out from running around all day." An obvious lie. "I think I'll call it a night."
"But-"
He got up quickly, Iruka stayed seated while Naruto took a step away, gave him space.
"Talk to you tomorrow."
He knew his tone was short, couldn't help it, forced it not to leak any warmth in his direction. He turned around, hadn't gone more than half a meter when someone said his name.
"Kakashi."
Not Iruka. He didn't stop walking, stop leaving. He wondered when he'd stopped calling him "-sensei". When he'd become so damn close. He had to tell him off, had to be a little cold. He knew the conversations around them had stopped, it was quiet in their corner.
"Watch your language, Naruto-kun."
The evening air felt good against his skin, he hated to put him in place, during all these years he'd done it maybe once or twice. He hated being harsh but it was better to play it of like he was a scatter-brained kid who didn't know better. True, he was hardly a kid any more, but it still felt as if he was, he could never see him as eighteen or nineteen or even twenty, he was still small and fragile and wanted to become hokage so bad that it was all he could think about.
Damn it.
He had surpassed him a long time ago, his strength ridiculous in comparison. And yet he treated Kakashi as if he was still able to teach him anything.
I haven't been able to teach you anything. Why are you still being friendly?
Don't waste your time on me.
Don't you know a lost cause when you see one?