"How do I know you're not a member of HYDRA?" Fitz asked in an exhausted voice. It had been less than 24 hours since SHIELD had been taken over by HYDRA, and Fitz was starting to feel crushed by the weight of the whole situation.
"Wha-Fitz? How could you even ask something like that?!" Simmons responded in a hurt tone.
"Well it's just... I feel I can't trust anyone. Nick Fury assassinated? SHIELD in pieces? And then there's Garrett. He was Ward's S.O. A good friend of Coulson, trained under Nick Fury himself. Who knows how many more could've joined? If Coulson couldn't see that his own friend was actually a traitor..." Fitz trailed off with water-brimmed eyes. He looked up at Simmons with a dismal expression on his face.
"Fitz," Simmons answered in a consoling tone, placing her arm on his shoulder, "Coulson hadn't seen his friend in years. Of course he wasn't able to see that change occurring. You and me, we're lucky, we get the chance to see our best friend every day. I'm sure if anything suspicious was going on between us, we would notice instantly." She gave him a comforting smile, but it quickly melted into a frown, "And honestly, if you're asking these questions, how can you think it's any different for me? How can I be sure this isn't all some act? How can I possibly be certain that you aren't HYDRA?" A deafening silence filled the room for a long moment. The cloud of depression and uncertainty hanging over them was almost tangible.
Fitz broke the silence, meeting her eyes, "Jemma, I'm sorry. It's just I...I almost died back there. We've been in plenty of dangerous situations before, but this...this was different," Fitz bit his lip, his eyes accumulating a bit more moisture than usual before he continued, "It was just so crazy Simmons. Facing death that closely. And what made it worse... they didn't just want to kill me. They wanted me to join them. They wanted me to...to become their new Zola, that freak, irresponsible scientist from HYDRA in World War II," Fitz let out a long breath, burying his face in his hands before continuing, "And of course I said no. I told them they were going to pay. But no one should be forced to make a choice between life and death, Simmons. No one. And I truly thought those were going to be my last words. The feeling that it is indeed the end... it's indescribable. And you know what? In that last moment, when I closed my eyes, I was worried that I had failed you. Failed to find you, failed to save you. And now that I'm finally with you again, why do these have to be the thoughts that are crossing my mind? I'm so sorry I'm having this conversation with you, Jemma. I'm so sorry. Deep down I do trust you, but I keep having these paranoid feelings..." Fitz stopped talking and just sat there looking completely lost.
Simmons let her arm slip from his shoulder, and instead grabbed his hand, "Fitz. I had a very similar experience back at the Hub. Multiple times, actually. I was in a lab room with Triplett when a message came in from our old friend Agent Weaver. She warned me not to trust anyone, that I needed to protect myself. So Triplett and I locked the door to keep rogue agents out. But I couldn't help this sinking feeling in my stomach. I've always trusted Triplett, Fitz, but during those moments…" It was Simmons' turn to have liquid threatening to slip from her eyes, "I was walking a very scary line, Fitz. I wanted to trust Triplett, but I had this fear deep down that he was going to turn on me any minute. I mean, he even gave me a knife to defend myself with, but..." Simmons sighed, and Fitz squeezed her hand in response. "And then Hand broke into the room with a group of agents. They were all armed, and they tried to make us swear our allegiance to HYDRA. They said if we didn't promise our unwavering devotion, they would kill us on the spot." Simmons let a single tear escape her eye before pressing on, "I kept my mouth shut Fitz. Didn't say a word. I feared that was going to be the end. I would go out with a silent protest. So I bit my lip tighter, hard enough to draw a bead of blood, bracing myself. Then Triplett sprang up and attacked them. I felt so stupid for my fears from earlier, was glad that he was defending me. Before he had took any of their lives; though, Hand admitted she was just testing us to make sure we weren't HYDRA. She said we passed. I was relieved, but in a way it almost made everything feel worse, Fitz. If she was that good at playing an evil HYDRA agent, why couldn't everyone else around us be playing friendly SHIELD? We can't trust anyone. And you're right, Fitz. That includes each other."
They passed a moment in silence, and the building water finally poured out of their tear-ducts. They squeezed each others' hands alternately for comfort. Then Simmons wiped her eyes and said, "New Zola, huh? In a way, that's quite the compliment Fitz. They really have faith in you."
"Which means I could be just as great of a weapon against them," Fitz said with a sideways smile, "And I cannot blame you for believing Hand was HYDRA. I mean, she tends to be quite the buzzkill in all situations. And she had HYDRA hair, for goodness sake."
They shared a laugh before Fitz jumped up and said, "You know what Simmons? Distrust is what tears teams apart. We've been with each other for quite a while. And I'm not just talking about you and me, Jemma, I'm talking about everyone on the bus. By this point we're all practically family. I wouldn't say that we shouldn't trust anyone, I would just say, 'Let's watch our backs.' "
Simmons smiled, and pulled Fitz into a hug. When she pulled away, she was grinning, and he was returning the grin. The only traces of the somber mood from before were the drying tears upon their cheeks.
"Go SHIELD!" Fitz said energetically.
Simmons gave Fitz a mischievous grin, along with a slight eye roll, "Doesn't quite have the same ring as HYDRA's slogan, but it works well enough. We need a way to smack them in the face anyways, might as well start small with a slogan of our own. 'Go SHIELD!' " she called out.
And with that they parted ways, as though nothing had come between them.