"So, they're gone?" I asked between kisses. Raffe paused for a moment to nod, and continued to kiss me.
Raffe hadn't really said anything to me since this morning when he left with his Watchers to see the rest of the angels off nor had he spoken during dinner. Him and his Watchers are now the only angels left on Earth; the angels went back to heaven today, a month after the blood hunt. And by how Raffe had immediately pulled me against him when we got back to our room and started kissing me, he seemed pretty stressed about it.
We were in our hotel room that the Resistance had assigned us after taking over the hotel. It was in San Francisco. It wasn't as extravagant as the hotels the angels had taken over, but it was still bigger than anything I would have stayed in during the World Before. They fed us here, which was one reason why we were still here. Another reason was that I was one of their leaders.
Raffe had his hands under my shirt and on my naked waist. One hand was exploring my back and holding me closer to him, although I don't think it's possible for me to be closer to him. His legs were straddling my hips, him sitting, with me standing. He bent his head and started kissing my neck and jawline.
"Uhm. Raffe? Are you okay?" I asked, my voice faltering. Raffe hasn't exactly been this affectionate lately with our schedules. Raffe stopped kissing me long enough to look up at me with dilated blue eyes. He sighed as if I just asked him to do an algebra problem.
"Yes. Now shush." He said in a low voice before kissing my lips again. I eagerly returned the kiss, our tongues teasing each other. Raffe's hands slipped down to the back of my thighs while he shifted me against him. A low moan escaped his lips as I started to rub my hips against his. Smiling at his reaction, I continued to shift restlessly against him, getting myself off like a middle-schooler. His breathing sped up to match mine.
I opened my eyes as Raffe's hands unbuttoned my jeans, pushing them over my thighs, where they slid off and puddled at my feet. Raffe pulled back from kissing me long enough to look at my naked legs. The way Raffe looked at me made heat rise to my cheeks but it also gave me the confidence to push him down on the bed. He looked up at me surprised, but there was also something else in his eyes. Excitement maybe.
He scooted farther up the bed; his demon wings were spread out around him. I gave him a small smile, hoping I didn't look like a scared child, as I climbed on the bed and straddled his hips. I leaned down and kissed him. His fingers trailed up the side of my thighs until his hands grabbed my hips, guiding me to grind into him.
Even though I was on top of him, Raffe was in control. I don't know what I would have done if he wasn't taking control. I was a level two player when it came to sexual interaction. Maybe a level three if you count right now. My world was a blur of sensations as we kissed wildly. I could feel Raffe rubbing against me through my thin underwear.
Raffe moved his hands from my hips to my breasts once I had a rhythm going. Raffe squeezed them almost to the point of hurting.
I leaned back from kissing him and sat up, starting to pull my shirt off. Raffe quickly sat up and covered my hand with his, stopping me from lifting my shirt anymore. Raffe rested his forehead against mine with one hand on the small of my back, pressing the soft skin of my naked stomach against the hard muscles of his. He closed his eyes and sighed.
"What are you doing?" I asked quietly. He opened his eyes and pressed a rough kiss to my lips and let go of my hand that he was holding.
"Savoring the moment." Raffe said in a low almost-whisper. If I thought his eyes were dilated before, I didn't know what I was talking about. He pressed another rough kiss just below my jawline. I hesitantly pulled my shirt over my head and tossed it to the side. Since I wasn't wearing a bra, my breasts were now exposed to him.
Raffe cupped my breasts and pressed a kiss to each one. His lips trailed up my chest as he kissed the spot between my neck and collarbone. I noticed that one of his wings was twitching slightly behind him and I felt him get harder beneath me. I pushed him back down onto the bed. I paused with our lips a millimeter apart to feel the electric tingle that comes from being that close to him before kissing him.
Raffe's hands moved all over my body, grabbing me in places only he has touched me. My fingers trailed down his chest and down his stomach. His skin felt hot under my touch. I had my hand on his belt when he grabbed my wrist. I pulled back from kissing him and yanked my hand from his grip. I didn't look him in the eyes as I climbed off of him, afraid that he would see the hurt that was most likely showing in my eyes.
This wasn't the first time that Raffe has stopped us from going very far. Last time he stopped us because he was afraid of the hellions going after me. He even spoke to an angel of death to make sure that it wasn't going to happen.
"You have to stop doing that." I said staring up at the dark ceiling. The room was completely dark now without any lights on. I felt Raffe shift in bed next to me until his body was pressed next to mine. He kissed my bare shoulder. It was a sweet and tender gesture that I wasn't in the mood to enjoy.
"Penryn, I'm sorry." He kissed my collarbone. "I shouldn't have done that." Another kiss to my neck. "I just- we don't have any protection." He ran a finger over a faint line of scars that lay in a jagged horizontal line across my abs. "What happened here?"
"We don't have to have sex." I said but even I didn't believe that we could have restrained from it. "And that's from marching band freshman year. I'll tell you about it later."
I sighed and turned my body so that my back was against his chest. I should be freezing right now but against him I felt warm. He pressed a kiss to my cheek and I closed my eyes, already relaxing in his arms.
I'm not sure how long I slept, but it couldn't have been long because a knock on the door woke me up. It was a soft knock that I could barely hear, probably more for Raffe than me. I kept my eyes closed while Raffe carefully got out of bed, trying not to wake me. He covered me up with a blanket up to my shoulders before answering the door. I heard him and whomever it was whispering briefly. I finally opened my eyes as the door shut and Raffe walked back in the room.
"What time do you have to leave tomorrow?" I asked as Raffe got back in bed. I turned around so I was facing him. He sighed.
"Four." He said before kissing my forehead. Lately him and his Watchers have had to leave really early to deal with reconstruction and gangs and such.
I crinkled up my nose. "Ew." That was all I said.
I snuggled closer to him; my hands were on his chest and one of his arms was above my head. I let my legs get tangled up with his. I pressed a single kiss to the center of his chest.
"Goodnight Penryn." He whispered; his breathing was already slowing down. I closed my eyes and listened to his heartbeat for a while. When I couldn't stand to be awake any longer, I matched my breathing with his and let sleep take me away.
I was back in the lab of the first aerie. Paige was standing in front of me; her skin was untouched and perfect. I reached down and caressed her cheek to make sure this was real.
"Ryn Ryn." Paige said in a calm voice, but her eyes were full of fear. She pointed to something behind me. I didn't want to see what it was. I wasn't going to waste time looking at it.
I scooped Paige up in my arms and tried to run but immediately fell. I realized I was wearing those strappy heels that I used to get into the aerie. Not wasting any time, I ripped the shoes off of my feet. I heard a hiss and felt hot breath on my neck. Paige's bloodcurdling scream ripped through me as I ran barefoot through the lab. I heard the low rumble of the Resistance attacks. I had to get out of there. I ran toward the exit trying not to slip on the wet floor- what was that? Blood? -I shook the thought out of my head and kept running from the locusts.
I turned a corner and ran straight into a wall. Wait, not a wall, a person. I recognized the dark chuckle that came from the person as Raffe's. I saw black demon wings poking out behind his back. I pushed his chest, trying to get him to move.
"C'mon. Move! We have to get out of here before the place blows." I said but Raffe just laughed.
"You're so dramatic, Penryn." He said blocking my way. He took Paige out of my arms and put her on the ground. He put his hands on my hips and pulled me against him. His hands were rough as they moved up my body.
"Raffe. I have to get my sister out of here." I punched and slapped his chest trying to get out of his grip. "Let go of me!" I shrieked. Raffe grabbed my wrists and held them above my head, angrily.
"I will break them if you punch me again. Now don't struggle." Raffe said in a low growl. But it wasn't really Raffe. There was a monster in his eyes. I swallowed hard and nodded. I heard another rumble, this one louder than before. I glanced at Paige. I had to get her out of here.
Raffe pressed me against the wall, caging me in with his body. His hands pawed at my body, ripping my clothes off. When the actual Raffe touches me, he's always gentle and respectful. I didn't know what this was. I looked over his shoulder and saw that the locusts had caught up with us. They looked around dumbly, like they didn't know what was going on.
As they looked around, Raffe had his way with me, touching me in places he never has before. I yelled to Paige to run, even though she still had dead legs. A locust picked up Paige as she was crawling away from me. I couldn't hear anything but rumbling now. The building was probably going to explode any second now.
Raffe morphed into someone else -I didn't' recognize the man anymore- and pulled his pants down to his thighs and aligned himself with me. This is it. I was getting raped as a monster sucks my sister's life out. The locust hovered its stinger over Paige's neck, trying to get it in just the right spot.
The man -angel- rammed his dick inside of me in the same moment the monster stung Paige.
This isn't real.
The rumbling became booming as concrete fell over us. I couldn't hear my scream above the noise but my throat was raw.
None of this is real I tried to tell myself. My vision faded to black.
I woke with a start and immediately sat up, hugging my chest. I have never felt this violated before. Raffe was immediately next to me, his arms encircling me. I shrugged his arms off of me, still shaken from my nightmare. He picked up my shirt from last night and handed it to me. I put it on but I didn't feel any better.
"What were the rumbling noises?" I asked and I realized my throat was actually raw. "Was I screaming?"
Raffe put a hand on my shoulder. I glanced at it and back at him. His eyes were full of worry. Using his thumb, he gently wiped tears off of my cheeks.
"It was just thunder from the storm. And yeah, you probably woke the whole floor." Raffe said as he started to hug me again. I grabbed his hands and held them in front of me for a moment before releasing them. "What did I do in your nightmare?" He asked.
I looked down at my hands, not wanting to tell him. "Why do you think you did anything?"
"You were screaming my name and telling me to stop."
"Well, I mean, it wasn't really you. It looked like you and sounded like you but it didn't feel like you. And you turned into someone else at the worst part." I said and looked up at him. "Paige got stung by a locust. I couldn't help her because of you… and then the building was collapsing around us."
Raffe put a hesitant hand on my back and I let him pull me into a hug. I took a shaky breath through the sobs that ripped through my body as I leaned against his chest. I hated crying in front of Raffe. It made me feel weak and he always seemed so helpless when I did.
"Shush. It was just a dream." Raffe said in a soothing voice, his hand was moving through my hair. "I'm sorry for whatever I did in there." He said holding my head against his chest. I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down.
"I just wish I would stop having these nightmares. It's over. My family is safe. Why does my mind have to keep telling me that they're not?" I said, mostly to myself, but I started crying again. Raffe held me there for a while longer, whispering soothing things into my hair. I finally pulled away from his chest so I could lie back down. I faced away from him so I could feel his whole body against mine.
He kissed my cheek before I fell back to sleep.
A/N: I've been playing with this idea for a couple of months and I'm still not sure where the story is going, but this was the first part of it.