- tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] at 16:21 -
TT: Dave.
TT: First of all, I want to congratulate you on finishing off the 11th grade. I would have done so today, in person, but it seems you had decided not to stick around school for any longer than necessary and left before I was given the chance.
TT: Regardless, I would appreciate it if you would celebrate with me our new "grad" status.
- tentacleTherapist [TT] sent turntechGodhead [TG] file -
TT: I've just sent you your invitation. My mother, generous as she is, has agreed to let me have the house this Friday through Saturday. She all but encouraged the presence of alcohol, too, going as far as purchasing several crates full of booze for our consumption. I've created an open event on facebook, as well as sent out a mass message to all of our friends. I fully intend on providing us all with the authentic high school party experience.
TT: See you there.
- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] -
In retrospect, you shouldn't have been surprised that the summer before your last year of high school started out the way it did. In all honesty, though your cousin didn't seem the social type, it wasn't all that out of character for Rose to throw a giant party celebrating the end of the school year. She was all about the "authentic high school experience", as she called it. Rose definitely had the means of pulling this off, as well - a big house, a pool in the backyard, and a mother who would not only condone teen drinking, but buy them all the alcohol they could need and more.
Besides, you were pretty sure Rose was hoping someone would break her mother's wizard figurines and statues and maybe also have gross sex in her bed. Actually, that may very well have been one of Rose's main goals.
The only rule Mom Lalonde had put in place was marking her wine cellar as out of bounds. Apparently, the stuff she kept down there was "fucking expensive".
Costly booze aside (and you were sure that Rose was planning on stealing some, anyway), it did not take much to convince you to go. Unlike your cousin, you aren't really a party kind of guy. You don't have too many friends and you don't enjoy interacting with strangers. Attending a big party like this was the last thing you wanted to do.
But then Rose pointed out that, when she said she invited "everyone", she meant everyone. And that meant Karkat would be there.
You could almost see her smirk when you messaged her to say you were planning on showing up.
So here you are, sitting on the bus, on your way to Rose's place. Your eyes are hidden behind a pair of shades, and you're wearing what you consider to be your most flattering clothes. Your hair, too, is perfectly styled. You spent an assload of time on your appearance today, as if it even mattered what you looked like tonight. Karkat sees you every day at school, anyway, and has for the past three years. You show up looking like utter shit on a regular basis. Nothing you do now is going to change that. The effort you put in today was basically a giant waste of time.
You crack your knuckles - a nervous habit. Except you've got no reason to be nervous. None at all, hahahaha. Like you said: you see Karkat every day. Interacting with him at a party should be no different from interacting with him anywhere else, right?
And it isn't any different, you think to yourself. It isn't any different at all, because whenever you see him - school, party, whatever - you're always nervous. You find yourself running your mouth, catch yourself staring, and your breath hitches at the smallest amount of contact. Being around him is exciting, and you can never get enough of it.
It's pretty ridiculous how gay you are for your best friend.
Rose's house is a short walk from the bus stop, and you make it there quickly. Instead of showing up an hour after the scheduled time like you usually would, you're only twenty minutes late, mostly because you're an eager fuck when it comes to spending time with Vantas.
The party's barely started and there's very few people in the house, but the first thing you notice when you walk through the front door is that Rose is already half wasted. You take one look at her expression and head straight for the table in the living room, which is covered in bottles of alcohol, including a box full of those tiny shot-sized bottles of vodka that are stupidly overpriced and basically pointless. You grab a handful and down three, shoving the rest in your pockets. You feel slightly more prepared to handle your cousin.
"Hey, Dave!"
You turn around at the voice, coming face to face with none other than John Egbert. You don't doubt for a second that he was here perfectly on time. Because he's a nerd.
"Hey, what's up?"
"Nothing much! Hey, I didn't get to see you on the last day of school, man. You left too quickly," John pouted.
"Sorry about that, bro. Just eager to go home and not think about education for two months, ya feel?"
"Haha, yeah, I guess. Crazy, though, right? We're grads now! Only got a year left of high school and then we're done!"
"Yeah, it's crazy all right," you say. "But to be completely honest, I'd rather not think about that right now."
John nods at you, "Of course, dude." He grins, and you're joined by Rose and Kanaya, Rose hanging off the other's arm.
"Dave, take this, I made it for you," Rose says, handing you a stereotypically red party cup filled with what you assume is a margarita (Rose has been fond of those lately).
"Thanks," you say, taking a sip. Kudos to Rose - it actually tastes pretty good.
"No problem," Rose said, looking distracted. From the corner of your eye, you notice that John looks vaguely uncomfortable. Your gaze falls to your cousin's hands, and - yes, she's definitely groping Maryam's ass. Kanaya, while not reciprocating the gesture, is also not doing anything at all to stop it. You suddenly realize that you're done here.
You clear your throat and ask, attempting a neutral tone, "Has anyone seen Karkat?"
That was casual, right? Yeah, totally casual. Just looking to hang out with a platonic bro. Nothing to see here, folks. See that yellow tape? Notice how it says "NO HOMO" on it repetitively. One hundred percent heterosexual, yep.
Rose is smirking at you and you glare at her from behind your shades.
"No, sorry," John says. His eyes flicker towards Rose and Kanaya again, and he leaves quickly, muttering something about going to look for Vriska.
"Karkat should be here soon," Kanaya tells you.
You nod in thanks, but your eyes are still trained on Rose. You can tell that she knows… and you can tell that she knows that you know that she knows. And, frankly, it's obnoxious as hell.
You don't really know any of the guests that have arrived so far, and exhausting though dealing with Rose may be, you'd rather hang out with her than stand around alone. So the moment you spot Terezi's ginger hair from across the room, you abscond the hell out of there and head in her direction.
"Hey, TZ!" you call out to her. Terezi turns to face you, a grin stretched across her face.
"What's up, cool kid?"
You smile back at her. You're relieved that you've found her here. Terezi is one of your closest friends, right after John and Karkat himself. You feel incredibly comfortable and at ease around her, and conversation flows with barely any effort at all. You like her shitty jokes and chalk drawings, and she appreciates your sense of humour. Hell, you even dated for a few months back in 10th grade. In the end, the both of you decided that your relationship didn't work as a romantic one. You're pretty sure neither of you even had feelings for eachother in that way, either. Actually, looking back, you think you may have had a thing for Karkat even throughout your relationship with Terezi - and you're even more sure that she suspected it at the time, too. Regardless, Terezi and you ended your "relationship" on good terms. Though, to be honest, the only thing that really changed was that you stopped making out all the time.
The entire time you're talking to Terezi, you find your gaze wandering towards to open front door behind her. You're sure that Karkat should be here soon, and you don't want to miss him.
Around your 60th glance, Karkat appears in the doorway. His eyes sweep the house nervously, and you wave at him to catch his attention. Karkat's eyes brighten when he spots you, and he makes a beeline towards where you're standing.
You crush the nervous excitement that's bubbling in your chest at the sight of him.
"Karkat, you made it!"
Karkat looks mildly annoyed, an expression he adopts often. His eyebrows are drawn together slightly, and his mouth turns down in a small frown. It's adorable.
"Whoopity-fucking-doo," he says. "Yes, I'm here. The next task on my never-ending to-do-list is to figure out how long I have to stay, because apparently, leaving this shitfest too early would be 'rude'. Although, if I had it my way, I wouldn't even fucking be here in the first place."
You raise an eyebrow. "Not feeling too enthusiastic today, are we?"
"Of course not, you idiot. You should know me well enough to know that I don't do parties! I'm only here because Kanaya really wanted me to come, and our friendship means a lot to me or whatever." Karkat huffs and looks away, his arms folded across his chest.
It takes all of your willpower not to kiss his stupid pouting mouth right there and then.
… You may be a little more buzzed than you thought. Absentmindedly, you glance down at the cup Rose had given you. Unsurprisingly enough, it's empty.
You turn around and head towards the kitchen, Karkat by your side. Taking advantage of your intoxicated state, you accidentally-on-purpose trip over your own feet, falling in Karkat's direction. He catches you before you can land flat on your face, hands gripping your upper arms.
"Jesus shit, are you drunk already?" he hisses at you.
"No, just buzzed. Don't worry about me, Karkat," you say, very aware of how close his face is to yours just about now. You can't help but feel disappointed when Karkat lets go of you with a "Whatever you say, shithead" and continues on your path to the kitchen.
Behind the counter, Rose is busy whipping up four more margaritas. She glances up at you when you walk in and smiles slyly, looking between you and Karkat and wiggling her eyebrows the slightest bit. Karkat looks at you in confusion, but you ignore him and throw your empty cup in the trash with a little more force than strictly necessary.
Rose wordlessly hands you a margarita each, then leaves the kitchen, dragging Kanaya behind her.
"What was that about?" Karkat asks you, sniffing his drink suspiciously. He takes a small sip and his face twists into one of disgust. "What the fuck is in this?"
"Tequila," you say, ignoring his first question.
Karkat doesn't seem to notice and shrugs his shoulders, taking another drink. "Huh, I guess it's not as bad the second time."
"Yeah, that's how things go with booze," you say. The alcohol is starting to get to your head, now, and you seem to be having trouble listening to what Karkat is saying instead of staring at his mouth as he talks.
Someone (you guess Rose) turns on some music in the living room next door. You can feel the bass traveling through the floor, into your feet and up your spine. You can't make out the song, but you're sure it's some pop fuckery that Rose chose especially for her Great High School Party. In fact, there is no doubt in your mind that she spent valuable time putting together a shitty top 50 playlist, one that was long enough to last the entire night.
It dawns on you that Karkat's trying to yell over the music, but you can't hear for shit so you grab his hand and drag him upstairs with you. Karkat yelps at the movement, but comes along quietly.
Upstairs, the music is softer, but you can still feel the bass line through to your core. You look at Karkat, considering your options.
"Wanna go on the roof?" you ask.
"What, and watch you fall to your ungraceful death? No thanks, dude. Maybe when you're not drunk," Karkat shakes his head at you.
"Come on, bro! I'm telling you, I'm fine. I can walk a straight line, officer, I swear!"
You demonstrate this ability and walk quickly down the hall, putting one foot in front of the other, heel to toe, heel to toe.
Karkat raises an eyebrow at you and sighs in exasperation. "Fine. You've convinced me."
You punch the air with your fist and give a celebratory whoop. "All right!"
Karkat just pushes you down the hall.
You make your way into Mom Lalonde's room, onto her balcony, and using the railings as leverage, up onto the roof. You sit down, leaning against the chimney, Karkat beside you. You look out at the view - Rose's backyard sure is huge. It's a typical Rich White People backyard (save for the wizard statues), complete with a giant pool. Karkat and you fall into a comfortable silence, and you finish off your margaritas.
You take Karkat's empty party cup and stack it on your own, then, standing up, you chuck them both in the direction of the conveniently placed garbage bag on Rose's deck. The wind pushes the cups off course and they land in the pool with a faint plop.
"Wow," Karkat says from behind you. You ignore him.
You sit down again, this time a lot closer to Karkat than you probably should. This isn't how platonic friends sit, you tell yourself, but his thigh is touching yours and you feel all warm and tingly. You want to hold his hand, but these aren't thoughts that platonic friends have about each other, either. You shove your hands in your pockets instead, and your fingers curl around two small bottles. You take out the vodka shots that you had forgotten you had, and hand one to Karkat.
"Here, take a shot with me."
Karkat stares at the tiny bottle in your hand, considering. After a few a beats, his hand snatches the shot from your grasp and he's unscrewing the cap and downing the whole thing in one go.
You quickly follow suite, throwing your bottle down into the backyard without bothering to aim. Karkat follows your lead and you lean back against the chimney, head turned in Karkat's direction.
Looking at him, you wonder idly when it all started. You can't really pinpoint the exact moment you thought, "oh shit, Karkat's hot" for the first time. Or the moment you realized that you might not mind hooking up with him, either. Like, at all. Preferably more than once.
Because weird gay feelings aside, Karkat really is hot. Your eyes rake over his face, lingering on his bright, shining eyes, framed by long, thick eyelashes. His eyebrows are big and dark, and, for once, not drawn together in annoyance. His skin is a light brown, and looks soft to the hair is a dark mess on his head, curls pointing in every which way. He looks like an angel, you think, and even though it's terribly cliched you mean it unironically. Karkat is fucking pretty. Your gaze falls to his lips, wondering what it would be like to kiss them. Your heart accelerates slightly in your chest at the mere thought, and you feel yourself leaning forward the tiniest bit. For God's sake, you're alone with him on the roof at a party, would it really be so bad to…?
You suddenly realize that you have passed on from the "I'm just buzzed" zone and into the "okay, I'm fairly drunk right now" zone. Karkat, on the other hand, hasn't had that much to drink and - yea, he's definitely looking at you strangely. You had been staring (again) and didn't even notice his shift in attention.
You should probably move back. You're way too close to him. Your hands start to sweat in your pockets.
Karkat's eyes are wide, and his lips are parted just the tiniest bit. A few seconds drag by, but he doesn't stop staring at you.
Suddenly, you lose all of your restraint and move the rest of the distance towards Karkat, your body twisted in an uncomfortable position on the roof. Your hands move out of your pockets; one supporting you with your palm flat on the shingles, the other threading its fingers into his unruly hair, pulling him closer.
You tilt his face to yours and kiss him lightly. Your lips linger over his, barely touching, and you wait for him to respond.
But he doesn't. Karkat is frozen, unmoving.
Oh, fuck.
You are suddenly panicking. What the hell did you just do? What response did you expect? Your mouth opens to apologize, but no sound comes out. What are you supposed to say? You stay there, frozen, held in place by the shocked expression on Karkat's face.
The spell breaks a moment later and you scramble backwards, head hung low. Your foot slips on the roof and there's a moment of complete terror where you almost tumble off completely, before Karkat grabs your arm and saves your ass for the second time that day.
"All right, buddy, let's go inside," he says. "You're clearly in no state to be up here."
You stand, avoiding eye contact, and follow Karkat off the roof. Your entire body feels numb as you jump down onto the balcony, your hands back in your pockets. You should have just kept them there in the first place. In fact, you shouldn't have come to this damn party at all.
You walk into Mom Lalonde's room. It's a lot hotter in here, and your head instantly feels more whoozy. You sit down on the bed and wait for the feeling to pass.
You feel Karkat sit down beside you, but you still can't make yourself look him in the eye.
Though, in all honesty, you're surprised he hasn't ditched you yet.
A silence settles over the room, and oh god is it awkward as shit. You can feel the discomfort eating away at your soul, slowly chipping away at it with icy hands. You're starting to wish you'd just disappear when Karkat speaks.
"Dave, you're drunk."
You hesitate, and then nod, slightly. "I guess so."
Karkat sighs, turning his head to face you. Your eyes remain locked on the floor, feigning interest in the patterned carpet.
"Look, Dave," Karkat pauses. "You… you just took me by surprise. I was one hundred percent not expecting that at all. And, I don't know, maybe in a different situation I would have kissed you back, but, we've been drinking, and I'm just not sure…" his voice trails off.
You raise your head slowly, meeting his gaze. "What?"
Karkat blushes. "I guess I'm asking you what you meant by… doing that."
You blink. He's looking at you expectantly, his nervousness clearly etched into every line on his face. His eyes are wide and anxious and oh god you're going to have to tell him how you feel.
"And for fuck's sake, take those off," Karkat grumbles, reaching up and sliding your shades off of your face. You let him without complaint.
"Well," you start, but your voice is hoarse and the sound that just came out of your mouth sounds more like a five thousand year old mummy coming back to life without realizing the state of its gross corpse standard vocal chords, than a teenage boy (who is both drunk and gay) about to totally woo his best friend.
You clear your throat and try again. "Well, uh."
Nice one! Keep 'em coming. Karkat will be reciprocating your feelings any time now.
You laugh nervously. "Man, look at us, playing right into Lalonde's authentic high school experience agenda. It's like one of those fucking movies about the high school girl who continuously fucks things up for herself all year until it reaches one giant fucking dumbassery shitpile and explodes into big climax fireworks of extreme hormonal stupidity. All of her friends hate her now and it's her own damn fault. Didn't she know you're not supposed to spring your stupid gay feelings on your best friend like that? Man, she done fucked up now. All she can do is wait out the last twenty minutes of the movie for the inevitable gooey end, where there is an abnormal rate of happy endings for every character and she is totally making out with that love interest that was introduced in the beginning, as her snarky cousin looks on from her spot on the minor gay character sidelines, idly groping her girlfriend's ass just to piss people off. The credits are rolling now but it's impossible to get that smug fucking face out of your head."
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Karkat stops you mid-rant. "And why do you refer to your cousin by her last name, that's fucking weird."
You sigh, ignoring his comment about Rose. "Look, Karkat. If you're asking me if I kissed you because I'm drunk and you're cute, then no, that's not why I did it. I kissed you because I'm drunk and you're cute, and I'm gay as hell. For you. Like, for a while now."
You are actually pretty proud of yourself that you managed to maintain eye contact throughout that whole thing.
"Oh," Karkat says. "Oh, okay."
You chew on your lip nervously. Karkat's eyes are drawn to the movement.
"Okay," he says again, eyes still trained on your mouth. You are very aware of this fact. You're also not sure what to think.
Karkat lays his hands on your shoulders. He tilts his head up and kisses you, hesitantly, and you can feel the heat radiating off his cheeks.
You are okay with this.
You smile, threading your hands into his hair for the second time that night. You lean back, dragging him with you, until you're lying on your back on the bed and Karkat is on top of you. You kiss him, this time harder, and yeah, you are definitely okay with this.
You're not really sure how it happened but suddenly Karkat's tongue is in your mouth and you're moaning into his, your breathing coming in pants and on of your hands moving to rest on Karkat's ass. You squeeze gently, and Karkat gasps, his mouth leaving yours for a split second. You take advantage of this and move your face further down, kissing his jaw and neck. Karkat's breathing is heavy in your ear, and his hips buck forward when you bite gently at skin between his between his neck and his collarbone. You groan at the sudden contact and your fingers tighten in his hair, pulling him back up to kiss you again.
Karkat places a hand on your chest and pushes himself up a bit, looking at you with half-lidded eyes.
"Look, we have to stop," he breathes.
You nod almost imperceptibly. "Uh, yeah, sure."
"I've got all the same gay feelings for you that you do for me, and all.." He's blushing. Aw, he's so cute. "But you're still pretty drunk. And I'm not exactly sober, either. So…"
"Yeah, you have a point," you say. You scramble out for underneath Karkat and move backwards a bit to lean on the pillows arranged behind you. Karkat follows suite, lying down beside you and curling into your side.
"All the same gay feelings, huh?" you ask, teasing.
"Yeah, whatever, dickshit," Karkat grumbles into your shirt.
You chuckle and run a hand through his hair. You can feel the alcohol starting to tug you in the direction of unconsciousness, and your eyes drift close. You fall asleep with a smile still on your face.
Your snarky cousin stands smirking in the doorway.