17 Things Emmett Is Not Allowed to do
Disclaimer: I own the ideas, not Twilight. :D
So, I writing a Language Arts paper, right? Right. And I decided it was extremely boring, putting aside the fact that writing is my life (besides Zuko, Howl, Haku, Ashitaka, Edward, Gerard Way, Gaspard Ulliel, Dougie Potyner, music, My Chemical Romance, Paramore, Twilight, books, reading, drawing, annoying the crap out of people, acting drunk in public...) So, I asked myself this question, "I wonder if the '17...' series fans would enjoy a fic about 17 things Emmett isn't allowed to do?" And then I thought, "Well, GEE. I think I'll write it!"
That was how this was born. Enjoy, my dears!
One: Crash his jeep in Edward's, Bella's, Rosalie's, Alice's, or Carlisle's precious babies (cars.) Jacob's is a-okay.
Two: Steal the Cullen women's undergarments. But for Rose, there is an exception.
Three: Steal Charlie's police cruiser, and go around Forks arresting people.
Four: Cook.
Five: Using any of Esme's furniture as surfaces for any special activities he may partake in with Rosalie.
Six: Sing all together. Especially "I Kissed a Girl," and anything by Hannah Montana.
Seven: Crash his jeep into the house altogether.
Eight: Think dirty thoughts about Edward.
Nine: Feel very excited around Jasper, successfully freaking Jazzy-poo out.
Ten: Poke Edward all the while thinking, "Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke."
Eleven: Congratulate Jessica about her pregnancy, and how he wants to be the Godfather of the bouncing baby boy.
Twelve: Congratulate Mike about his pregnancy, and ask how he accomplished getting pregnant in the first place.
Thirteen: Buy clowns on eBay, and then giving them to Jasper for his birthday, seeing as clowns are scary, and whenever Jasper is feeling something, everyone else is feeling that thing.
Fourteen: Watching the movie "Thirteen" and saying, "Geez, Rose. That Evie character really should play you in that movie Twilight they're making about us and Bella. Because she is hot." (A/N: Evie in "Thirteen" is Nikki Reed and Nikki Reed does play Rose in the movie.)
Fifteen: Walk up to random, unsuspecting pedestrians and sniffing their hair.
Sixteen: Eating muffins named Mannford (A/N: See, I was drawing muffins and then I decided to give them mouths, and then eyes, and then arms, and then feet, and so Mannford the muffin and his family were born. Heh...)
Seventeen: Say, "No, thank you" to a...special moment with Rosalie. Alone. In their room. With the door locked (like that'd do any good.)
Okay. This isn't as great as the other ones, but I hope you enjoyed it all the same! Reviews are most welcomed, and flames the opposite. If anyone has any ideas for this series, please tell me! Of course, you get credit.
So, review please! :D