My heart almost stopped beating when I lost sight of the one thing that's important to me…
Axel heaved a heavy sigh and rolled a foot away from his desk as he stretched, looking out the window and realizing that it was already dark outside. It had been a long day. Looking at the clock on his computer, he realized that it was nine already. He reached over to grab his phone, turning it on to look at the notification. 5 missed calls from Roxas. He heaved yet another sigh. "He really needs to stop calling me during my work hours…" he said in annoyance.
Maybe it was the exhaustion, maybe it was the stress and the burn out, maybe it was because they have lived together for so long… But he had found that Roxas had become really needy lately and it became increasingly… annoying. He knew he shouldn't feel that way. He still loved his blond unconditionally. Deep down, he knew that. But deeper down, there was a feeling of annoyance and he just wanted some time alone to himself. He opted to text his lover instead of calling him back. "Hey Rox. Sorry. Busy the whole day today. I'm coming home in probably an hour or so. So head to bed without me and don't wait up."
He started packing up, putting his laptop into his backpack and the charger along with it. He also packed up printouts of important wireframes and designs. He just needed to finish everything and there would be no more working late. He made a trip a trip to the restroom before finally turning off the lights of the office and heading out to the lonely parking garage. He was the last one out of the office building again.
His car beeped alive as he pressed a button and at the same moment, he heard a chime from his phone. A reply from Roxas. "Hey. Drive safe. I'm waiting up. You'll come home to warm food. :)"
Axel paused, feeling a tinge of guilt for the things that the blond did for him when he was acting like an asshole. "It will be late, Roxy."
"I don't care. I wanna wait up."
A slight smile formed on his face. "Alright then. I'll see you, love."
And the redhead climbed inside his sedan, loosened up his tie, and drove home.
Roxas didn't know what he did wrong. He wasn't dumb. He knew that Axel had been nothing but distant and cold. And the only reason he can come up with was that Axel fell out of love with him.
They had been sweethearts since high school and that was 7 years ago. They were childhood friends and when Axel turned 19 and Roxas was 17, Axel confessed. Roxas was confused at first, but soon came to realize that he did have romantic feelings for his best friend. He couldn't imagine living a life without Axel.
And so, after dating for 3 years, they decided to move in together. To a small one bedroom that they share. They had been living together for four years now. However, it seemed like the honeymoon period was over and they grew apart from each other. Axel started to become busy with his new project and Roxas… Well, nothing much was going on with Roxas' life. As a 24 year old, he worked as a waiter in a restaurant. He had dropped out of high school whilst Axel was pursuing a college degree.
And Axel had told him that he would do his best to earn enough for the both of them so Roxas didn't have to worry about anything. That was the dream back then, but Roxas didn't know if it still held through. He knew he was being a burden to the redhead. He earned just enough to cover half of the rent and he knew he wasn't helping much in relieving Axel's stress.
He heaved a sigh. Axel would be better off without him. He had called Axel five times that day and the redhead didn't answer a single one of his calls and instead texted him. The lovey dovey feeling that they had years ago was now gone.
Roxas never imagined a life where they would fall out of love. The blond still loved Axel immensely and he was trying his hardest to patch things up. Perhaps he wasn't doing enough. Perhaps he should call more. Perhaps staying up and preparing meals for Axel would mend their relationships. Perhaps…
Flipping through the channels on the tv, the small blond hugged his knees close, feeling alone and cold. He missed the time when Axel would watch tv with him, hold him close, and kept him warm. How long ago since they did something like that? Now, Axel worked day and night and they barely ever spend time with each other.
Roxas perked up when he heard the clicking of the doorknob. He stood up and walked over to the door to open it, forcing a smile. "Welcome home!"
"Ah hey, Rox. You really didn't have to stay up."
The blond reached over to grab Axel's bag and took it, putting it in the living room. "Well, I want to. Go take a shower and I'll warm up your food."
"I'm just going to head straight to bed. I'm tired, Rox. You should head to bed too."
"Have you eaten?"
"I'm not hungry."
"You really should eat."
"I said I'm not hungry, Roxas. I'm fine." The redhead raised his voice.
Roxas shrunk and took in a deep breath. "... That's alright then… Good night, Axel."
"... I need to finish up some work tonight. So don't wait up."
"... I can sleep in the living room. So you can work in the bedroom." Roxas walked off to their room and grabbed his pillow and a spare blanket before Axel could say anything else. He then plopped down on their large sofa, making himself comfortable and closed his eyes, listening to Axel's dissipating footsteps to the bathroom.
That was… unpleasant…
Axel sighed again as he felt the hot water running down his skin. How did things get like that between them? How did they grow so distant? Just one more week. One more week until he finally saved up enough money for a ring. But at this rate, would Roxas even accept his proposal?
He washed his face. Was he the one who drew that large cliff between them? He just wanted to be left alone after a long and tiring day. Why couldn't Roxas understand? Well… no… the blond did understand and he did leave him alone.
"Goddammit…" he groaned softly. When did it become so hard to communicate with Roxas?
Roxas couldn't sleep. He could hear the shower running and he could also hear the tick tocking of the wall clock. He stared at the clock. He should just disappear. Axel didn't want him anymore. "He's been taking a shower for 5 minutes now… he'll be in there for another 10 minutes…"
He sat up and his feet took him to their bedroom. He took a rather large bag and start getting his clothes out of the wardrobe and shoving them into said bag. He had decided to leave. He hesitated, stopping completely midway. What was he doing? Was he giving up?
Before he knew it, he was now standing in front of the bathroom. He turned the knob and stepped inside. "Axel…"
Hearing the sound of his blond, the redhead turned off the shower and opened the shower door, completely naked. "Roxas? You shoulda just let me know if you need the shower."
"No… I… I'm leaving."
"Leaving? To where? It's late."
"Anywhere. Away from here. Away from you." Cerulean eyes stared into jade.
"Excuse me?"
"... If it's so hard to come home and see my face, Axel. I might as well just leave."
"What the hell gave you that idea? Look. Can I just dry up, wear some clothes, and we can talk?" The redhead panicked when he saw the tear filled eyes of his blond and the bag that the blond was holding.
"We don't need to talk. We both know what's going on, Ax. You'd be better off without me around. So I'll leave."
The redhead frowned, feeling hurt and angry at the same time. "Well, you tell me what the hell is going on because I don't have a goddamn idea. Where are you running off to? Do you have someone else you'd rather be with? Have you been fucking cheating on me?!" Axel wasn't even sure why he said things like that. He knew very well that Roxas would never cheat on me.
"Cheating?" the blond hissed out. "What…?"
"I…"
"I've been doing nothing but be loyal to you. Waiting for you every night when you obviously avoid me. Doing what I can to patch out relationship back together. But it's obvious you want me out of your life. If that's what you want, Axel. That's what you're going to get. Fuck you," the blond said spitefully and ran out of the house.
"Oh my god. What have I done?!" Axel decided to give chase, but soon realized that he was fully naked. He quickly pulled on some pants and when he went back to chase after the blond, he had disappeared into the darkness of the night.
Axel searched every corner of the streets, but found no sight of his lover. He tried calling Roxas' phone, but soon realized that the blond didn't even bring his phone with him. Goddammit, Rox. No. That's not what I want. I'm just tired and stressed out and I… I took it out on you. Oh god… I screwed up bad.
A week later.
"Axel looked like shit without you, Roxas. You should really go home."
Roxas looked over at his best friend, Xion. "I don't have a home anymore."
"C'mon, Roxas. You know Axel still loves you. He just does stupid things sometimes. Couples fight all the time, it's normal. Do you still love him? If you do, you really should go back and hear out what he has to say."
"What does he have to say? He doesn't need me and I need to learn to not need him. He thinks I'm cheating on him. What the hell…"
"Well, go and talk to him. Give him a good punch or slap. Do something rather than hiding out here."
"No. I'm done. We're done," the blond say, not giving much more room to the conversation as he walked out of his best friend's apartment to go to work.
Axel had called everyone he and Roxas knew, Xion included to find out the whereabouts of Roxas, but he found nothing. "It has been a week. Where did he go? Is he okay? Oh god. Roxas… please… come back home… Is this what it feels like to be ignored? To be waiting all the time? What have I done? I'm so stupid…"
The redhead stood in front of a jewelry store. He finally saved up enough money to buy a decent ring for his beloved. He didn't even care of Roxas wasn't even going to be there to see the ring. He bought the ring anyway. "The price of this ring is our relationship. How much more stupid can I get?"
He walked out of the jewelry store, feeling defeated, staring at the white diamond wedding band. He shoved the ring into his pocket. He needed to find his love. Where would Roxas be hiding? It was then he realized that he could check their credit card bill to find out Roxas' whereabouts. And then he found the recent purchases that Roxas had made. It was near Xion's house.
Oh of course! That damn Xion!
The redhead then sprinted to the raven haired girl's house.
Roxas had quitted his job and asked to be transferred to another branch of the restaurant that happened to be near Xion's place. After his afternoon shift, he walked home, exhausted, smelling like food and oil, feeling gross. He was about to enter the apartment complex, but he came to a sudden halt when he saw the familiar redhead waiting outside.
Their eyes met before Roxas could even start running away. The redhead immediately ran over and grabbed the blond's wrist, preventing any means of escape. "Roxas. Oh god. You're here," Axel said, relieved.
"Let go. Or I'll scream rape."
"Oh c'mon, Roxas. Please… just hear me out. I know I've been an asshole."
"No. You've been more than an asshole and I want you to stay the fuck away from me," the blond said, already hurt beyond words. "I don't want to return to a place where both of us are miserable. I'm done with that."
"No. Just… hear me out."
"There's nothing to hear out. We're done! You're done with me and I'm done with you. We can both move out with…"
The blond was paused as Axel's lips pressed forcefully against his. His breath hitched and he took in a shaky breath, finally calming down against the kiss. Slowly, he kissed the redhead back, standing on tiptoes, wrapping his arm around the tall and lanky man's neck. He pulled away before the kiss could get passionate, looking into the jade green eyes.
The redhead then knelt down on one knee without a single word and pulled out a black box. He opened it, revealing the diamond wedding band, looking up at the blond. "Roxas, I know I've been an asshole. But would you marry me and spend the rest of your life with me? I promise I'll try my damndest to make you happy. I won't guarantee that we won't fight. But if we do, you can take my word that I'll find you to the ends of the earth to get you back. I can be stupid sometimes… a lot of the time… but I don't know what to do without you."
"You ask me to marry you after accusing me of cheating?"
"I was stupid, Roxas. I shouldn't have said anything like that."
Roxas took in a deep breath. "I… I really don't know," he backed away. Of course he wants to marry Axel. That had been what he wanted for the last four years. But now? He wasn't sure anymore.
"Roxas, I have been under a lot of pressure at work. And I admit that I have been feeling really stressed and burned out and I took it out on you. I'm really sorry. Please forgive me."
"..." There was an awkward silence before the blond nodded. "I love you, Axel. … Took you long enough, stupid."
Axel grinned his signature grin and took the blond's left hand and slipped the wedding band to his lover's ring finger. He then stood up and pulled the blond in for a hug. "I'm really sorry and I love you. Please come home with me?"
Roxas smiled for the first time in four months. "Yeah. I'm gross and I want a shower."
"Of course. I'll prepare the bath for you."
"And my legs are sore and I'm hungry."
"I'll give you my best massage and I'll cook something good for you," the redhead grinned happily.
"And I want to sleep with you and I don't want to be cold."
"I'll sleep beside you and hold you close and keep you warm."
"And I…"
"I'll wake up early in the morning and wake you up with the smell of delicious breakfast. I'll make bacon, hash brown, and sunny side up eggs. Your favorite."
"Hmmm… sounds good."
"I love you, my Roxas."
"I love you too."
Three months later, the two lovebirds walked out of the church with their wedding certificate in hand. It was a small wedding in the church because Roxas didn't want to do anything extravagant. He'd rather that they save up for a decent house. "Well, we're married now," the redhead grinned after they've been congratulated by all their friends and family as they were heading back to their apartment.
Roxas chuckled. "So, what will change?"
Axel hummed. "Hmmm… Let's not worry about that. We have our honeymoon to go to."
"Oh? You actually planned a honeymoon for us?"
Axel laughed. "Of course! You're mine, Roxas. And I wanna spend all my time with you for a month and then we can go back to our boring old routine."
"Hmmm. Okay. Sounds good. Surprise me."
"And surprised, you will."
The redhead pulled the blond close and kissed his forehead lovingly, lips formed into a big smile. "I love you, Rox," he whispered softly.
I promise I won't do anything stupid that will make you run away from me ever again. We'll grow old together. I will always be by your side and you will always be by my side. The day you die is also the day that I'll join you in the grave.
Hey everyone, been a long while. A little AkuRoku drama, I guess? I haven't written a long while 'cause of all the life stuff that's been happening. Well, I hope you enjoyed this at least. Have a good day!