"Hurry up Harry! We're leaving without you!" Hermione called up the stairs of the boys dorm, jerking Harry from his cat nap effectively. He heard the common room door slam shut and the queit grating on his nerves. He hadn't been able to stand dead silence for a good three weeks, since he defeated Voldemort. When it was queit he had to remember, remember those that lost their lives in the war and remember the night he had killed the self-proclaimed Dark Lord. The last battle had happened over the Christmas Hols of Harry's 7th year at Hogwarts. This would be his first day back to classes since.

He had been distinsing himself from others, most everyone except for Sirius, who he asked to call Dad and had been told yes with a watery hug, ever since the start of the new school year. Ron and Hermione were starting to really worry. Harry's eyes had taken on a pained, haunted look. He had thrown himself into his studies. The only time the rest of the school saw him was at meals. He mostly spent his time outside or in his dorms.

Flinging himself off the bed he checked the clock. It told him he was 20 minutes late for dinner already. Grabbing his trainers off the floor, and totally forgeting his robes (perves, he's got jeans and a t-shirt on!) he sprinted out of the tower and towards the Great Hall, all the while trying to get his shoes on. As he rounded the corner to the hall he didn't notice the silence that the usually noise-filled hall had surrounding it. He finally got his shoes on just as he walked through the already open doors.

Only noticing too late that there was someone standing in the doorway. Undoubtably he walked right into said person, effectively knocking both of them onto the floor.

The hall was in a hush of silence as they watched as Harry Potter knocked over the man who looked remarkably familiar. Albus Dumbledore stood at the head of the teachers table, a pensive, if wary, look on his face.

"Oomph." The man that Harry knocked into said as he feel. Harry started scrambling to get back on his feet and held out his hand to help the stranger up. The man grabbed Harry's hand and hauled himself up, just not looking at who knocked him over. Wide brown eyes locked with confused green ones. Harry, for his part looked quite calm, if not slightly confused.

"Why am I not suprised?" He muttered to himself as he turned away from James Potter toward Dumbledore. "Proffesor, am I going insane, or is he really standing there?" His voice was calm, with only a hint of urgency. The whole hall looked at him in astonishment. They were all wondering how he could be so calm when it's his suposedly dead father he ran into.

"Yes, dear boy, he is really standing there. You might want to introduce yourself. He might not know who you are. Though, looking at your face James you undoubtably recognize your son." Dumbldore's voice held amusment and there was a knowing smile on his face. James looked at the young man before him, the haunted green eyes, seeker's build and unruly black hair, trying to place him as the pudgy baby he had held 15 years ago. His son had grown to be a handsome young man, he concluded.

"You know what Albus?" Harry said as he walked calmly over to the Gryffindor table, grabbed an apple and a sandwhich before turning around and heading toward the Head Table until he was three feet infront of the headmaster. His voice was cold, distant. One that outed even Malfoy's voice, a smirk on his face. The ceiling was swathed in black clods and lightning was the only sound to be heard. "I don't think I will. I am going to go get Dad from your office and then go for a stroll. You can deal with him," At this point Harry jerked his thumb over his shoulder towards where his father stood in unbelieving silence, "because I am not in the mood. Have fun!" He chirped in a low, dangerous voice that sent chills down even Snape's back. He turned and strode to the door, nodded once to his father before stalking in a very Snapish manor towards the Head masters office. "Dad." He said once he stepped inside the office. He hadn't even noticed the tears that were running down his face and the sobs that were racking his frame.

Sirius Black turned his head away from Fawkes at the sound of his godson's distressed voice, only to discover he was shaking like a leaf and sobbing like there was no tomorrow. He quickly strode across the room and gathered the young man in a tight embrace. Harry gripped tightly to his robes, and sunk to the floor. Sirius went with him and rocked Harry back and forth, trying to calm the boy. He was starting to wonder why Harry was like this when Dumbldore, Snape, Mcgonagal, and a man with black hair entered the office.

It was the last man that had Sirius's attention. They all turned to look at the two of them on the floor. One man sobbing, the other gently rocking and trying to soothe the distraut one.

"Siri?" The black haired man asked astounished. James had not thought about Sirius being in the castle when he set out for it. The only thought in his head had been about finding Dumbldore and then his son. He finally noticed the sobbing figure in Sirius's arms and his heart ached to see his son like this.

"James?" Sirius whispered. He could feal his eye's tearing up and quickly blinked. James collapsed on an armchair, staring at the two on the floor. Harry hadn't noticed he others enter he room and started talking to Sirius, his head still bent in the older mans robes.

"Sorry Dad. It's just, he was there. Right there. After 16 years. My Father was standing right in front of me and I...I couln't take it. Everyone want's me to be strong. Everyone wants me to be the hero. And I can't. I can't be strong anymore. Voldemort may be dead but it's not over. It'll never be over. I just want to die." The desperation in the boy's voice brought tears to everyones eyes. The boy they had all taken for granted had finally broken under the strain. He laughed bitterly. "I might as well tell you all my secret's now, huh? Did you know that the Dursley's beat me? Starved me? Locked me in a cupboard for 10 years of my life?" All of the adult's that had been standing previously sunk into chairs at the boy's confession. "The worst part is that I told Dumbldore. I told him that it wasn't anymore safe for me there than at The Burrow. Yeah, I've got the Blood Protection. That doesn't protect me from those bastards. It only got worse this summer, Siri. So much worse. He raped me. That basard I call my uncle raped me. And it was my fault. All the beatings, the abuse, the rape. All of it was my fault. I deserved it. Look at all the people that've died because of me. Cedric, Remus, Mum. All of them. I deserved it." He finally broke down and sobbed into his hands, pulling back from Sirius's limp arms. He looked at his godfather's face in pain and acceptance. All Sirius could do was stare in shock. "And now you know. Now you know how broken and dirty and revolting I am. And you hate me. Look at you. All you can do is stare at me in shock. I'm sorry. I'm so bloody sorry I couldn't be the perfect hero. I quit. I quit because I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to live, I don't want to have to fight anymore." He hauled himself off the floor. He looked in horror at all the adults that were staring at him.

Dumbldore looked old, tired. The twinkle in his eyes gone. Snape was watching him in astonishment, a new respect in his eyes. Mcgonagal had tears streaming down her cheeks, her shoulders shaking slightly. James Potter was furious. He was mad a Vernon Dursley for doing that to his son. His fury showed on his face in all it's glory. He didn't know that the fury he showed would be interpreted differently by his son, like he was mad at him and not Dursley.

"I know what you're thinking, Potter. Look at what a failure your son is. Mum must have been lucky to have died all those years ago. She didn't have to watch me kill people and die a little each time. Now's your chance, take Dad and get outta here. I don't hold any responsibility to you. I took care of myself for 16 years, I can do it again. What Dad, or you, would want to watch a failure. Just take Dad and get him out of here, keep him safe until I can catch Pettigrew. Then you're both free to live whatever lives you care to. I don't think I'm gonna live through tonight, so I don't matter. Just keep Dad safe Potter, keep him from coming for me. He gets hurt tonight I'm holding you responsible. I don't care what you have to do, keep him safe. It ends tonight. There's only one death eater left, Bellateix. Bella baby, here I come." He stated grimly. He left the adults then, all of them still trying to catch up with what he had said. Sirius suddenly jumped up from his spot on the floor and raced toward the door.

"Stupify." James Potter cursed his childhood friend. Everyone looked at him, curious as to why he just stopped his friend from stopping his son from walking to his possible death. "I haven't been there for him, the least I can do is respect his possible last wishes. And those were to keep Sirius safe. If any of what I've heard tonight is true, he'll survive. Gryffindor stupidity, we don't know when to just die." He tried to joke but anyone could see the agony in his eyes.

If anyone had looked at that moment they would have seen Harry Potter crying silently at the Gargoyle to the headmasters office, waiting for his godfather or father to come after him. To tell him it's too dangerous, to tell him they love him. When no one came his heart broke. No one loved him. No one didn't want him to go. No one.

If Harry had looked around he would have seen the blond boy standing about 6 feet from where he was, watching in confusion as Harry stood there for a good ten minutes, looking like he was waiting for someone to come from the office above. As he started to cry silently Draco's alarm rose, he had never seen Harry look this heartbroken and hopeless. Then Harry's face changed. It hardened into a stone mask of grim determination. It scared Draco. It looked like Harry had just given up all hope of a happy life, like Dementors were surrounding him. Totally Desolate and totally welcoming to death.

Draco marched up the still open steps to the Headmasters office. When he entered the office he was taken aback by the man sitting in front of the fire, James Potter. Pieces seemed to click together in his head. He knew what had happened.

"He went off to fight Him didn't he?" He knew the answer but Severus still nodded. "No one went after him when he walked out of here after his big speech did you?" He gritted out. Everyones heads snapped up at his question. James shook his head, Severus questioned him with his eyes.

"Why?" Sirius asked, even more confused than before. Draco stared at them like they were idiots.

"I just watched him stand at the bottom of those stairs for ten minutes as if he were waiting for someone. Then he looked heartbroken and started to cry. He then looked as if there were dementors surrounding him as he walked out of the hallway." He hinted. None of them seemed to get it except Severus.

"Were idiots." Stated blandly. Draco nodded.

"Why?" Sirius repeated his earlier question.

"We just let a boy, who didn't think anybody cared about him, walk out of here to his possible death. And nobody tried to stop him. He expected someone to. He expected Sirius here to try to talk him out of it. To prove that someone loved him, accepted him as he was. But we just let him walk out of here. To his possible death." James seemed to catch on next.

"What do we do now?" Draco asked. Dumbldore asnwered him in a whispered voice.

"We wait. And hope."

All occupants of the headmasters office, Severus, James, Sirius, and Draco, looked up when the door creaked open 3 hours later. In walked a ragged and pained looking Harry Potter. His robes were torn and bloody, most of it not his, and his hair was matted and sweaty. HIs wand was still gripped tightly in a white knuckled hand.

"It's done." That small admission was the only sound in the silent room. His expression hadn't changed from the grim look, but you could see the pain and lonliness in his eyes. He didn't seem to see anyone but Sirius, looking at him him with half hopeful eyes. Sirius knew what to do, he had taken care of this boy enough to know what he needed was to be held and rocked gently, words of comfort whispered in his ear. He sprung off his chair and wrapped his arms around the standing figure. Harry fought back weakly, trying not to break down again that night. He soon gave up and clung to Sirius as if his life depended on it. His soft cries, such a mournful sound it broke everyones heart, echoed around the room.

"I'm sorry Harry, so sorry. I should have tried to stop you. But I know how stubborn you are. Would you have really not gone if I had asked you and said I loved you?" Sirius looked down into the truthful and totally open eyes of his godson. He could see the answer there but waited for the confirmation.

"Yes." His voice was so honest no one would have not believed him. It broke Sirius's heart to know that he could have stopped his godson from hurting like this, that if he had just been able to go after him he could have prevented him such heartache. He glared over Harry's head at James, who looked torn between regret and relief that his son was okay. Harry burrowed his head into Sirius's neck, his voice slightly muffled when he spoke. "I'm sorry I thought you didn't love me. I was just scared, it's not everyday you learn that your dead father his alive and has showed up at your school. And the look on his face...furious." His voice cracked and he yawned. Sirius could tell he was wiped out physically and emotionally.

"Come on Harry." He said as he steered the groggy boy towards the door. James stood to take Harry but Sirius gave him a look. "You can't help. He doesn't trust you. He doesn't trust easily and you hurt him. For which I will have a few words for you when I get back. Come on, you can stay in my rooms tonight. You seem to spend all your time there anyway." He teased lightly. It was true, since Sirius got his own private rooms at Hogwarts that's were you could find Harry, curled up on the couch reading or working on homework. The others watched as Sirius led Harry out of the room, talking to him softly.

"He's a good dad." Severus intoned quietly. James seemed to remember something he wanted to ask before.

"He calls Siri 'Dad'?" His voice was curious, no jealousy tainted it as one might think. The other two men in the room looked at James, both wondering what was going to happen next.