Curled up in a ball
Laying on my bedroom floor
The blade slips from my hand
While the pills take me to Neverland
I am leaving today
But I'll be back by yesterday
Don't worry love I'll remember
That you're leaving in December
That's five months away
Because it's the middle of May
The cannons boom
And the lions roar
I'm lying in my room
Dying slowly on the floor
Fifteen year old Avery lies on her bed in the room of the rehab, Peaceful Minds. It's located in on the outskirts of Seattle, Washington. Peaceful Minds was just about a two and a half hour drive from Vancouver, Canada. It was just about a twenty-four hour walk.
The only reason Avery was stuck there at Peaceful Minds was because she was a so-called 'substance abuser' and 'self-injurer.' All she had ever done was get addicted to heroin, coke, and cut…a lot.
Because of her long-term use of heroin and coke she had dark circles under her eyes and she became extremely thin (most of the nurses confused her with one of the food issue girls, as if!). Her arms, as well as her legs, were lined in scars from various razors, saws, knives, among other things.
Avery's former roommate and best friend, Vera, had left Peaceful Minds because she had been 'cured.' Five weeks after leaving, Vera died from a heroin overdose. But that had been a year ago. Avery had been locked up in this place since she was thirteen. She had started using when she was ten. A year later she started cutting. She and Vera would have gotten away with everything if that son of a bitch, James, hadn't ratted them out.
She remembered that day clearly; one Thursday afternoon after lunch her and Vera decided to skip class and just smoke some pot under a bridge a mile or two away from the school. Little did they know that the goody-goody James had followed them with his camera. They skipped the pot and went straight for the coke. James took pictures and turned them into the principal. Later that day, after her parents had yelled at her, Avery rushed into her room and grabbed the first sharp thing that she could find, the razorblade friendship necklace Vera had given her. She ripped it off her neck and let the sharp point pierce the skin on her thigh, just a few inches above her left knee. Her parents had walked in on it and freaked out. Next thing she knew, her ass was landed in Peaceful Minds.
Avery's new roommate was supposed to arrive that very day. She really didn't care but the nurses there told her to look 'presentable' (whatever the hell that meant) so she slipped into a white, lacy skirt that stopped just above her knees and a blue and white striped tank-top. Although her arms and shoulders were bare, she felt comfortable. So what if I'm covered in scars? If people stare, then they really need to get used to rehab, she thought to herself.
She placed a blue headband over her ebony black hair and let her side bangs fall in place blocking one of her startling, ice blue eyes. Around her eyes was a thick layer of black eyeliner and on her lashes was a two coats of mascara. To complete her look she threw on a dab of bubblegum pink lipgloss.
As she took a final glance at herself in a mirror, there was a knock on the door. She let out a sigh and went to let whoever in. When she opened the door, her eyes fell upon a tall, handsome stranger. He had wavy, midnight black hair, green-blue eyes, a rough face, and through his slightly tight, plain white tee, a chiseled body was slightly visible. He had pale pink lips that Avery wanted to just reach out and run her fingers over.
"Miss Avery, meet your new roommate, Brendan Parker," the nurse announced before walking away. Brendan set his bag down on the floor to the right of him and let out a hand. She took it firmly and shook it.
"Nice to meet you," Avery said and flashed him a smile.
"Nice to meet you too," Brendan said before breaking their grip and picking up his bag again. Avery moved out of the doorframe to let him in. He went to the empty bed and set his navy blue bag down. She rubbed her arm nervously, hoping this gorgeous stranger hadn't noticed the scars running up and down her forearms and shoulders.
"Not to be nosy or anything, but what're you in here for?" Brendan's deep voice startled her. She jumped in surprise before replying.
"I'm a druggie and…I cut," she said the last part so softly he barely heard it. But he did manage to hear it somehow. She didn't know why, but all of a sudden it seemed so stupid and embarrassing. Her cheeks flushed bright pink and she bit her lip.
"What're you in here for?" She asked in a soft voice.
"Sex addict," he replied with a wink and a broad grin. She let out a laugh, surprising because she hadn't laughed since the week before Vera left Peaceful Minds. It took her a minute to realize that he was joking (or was he?).
"I'm kidding. Actually I'm in here for bipolarness. I have no clue what it's actually called," he chuckled.
Brendan got up and stretched. Before he left the room he cupped his hand beneath her chin and his gaze penetrated her eyes.
"You have such a beautiful smile, don't hide it," he whispered softly. And with that he was gone. Just after he left Avery realized she was holding her breath and she let out a tiny gasp.