The Darkness of the Day
Sarah learns what it means to say goodbye...
A girl lay on a stranger's bed, her dark hair splayed about the pillow. Lost in a deep, deep sleep. Trapped within the boundaries of an impossible dream. He watched her closely, eyes never leaving the form of her on his bed, noting the movements of her face. He saw how it would break into a slight smile, how her brow would crease, or how her lips would part slightly, all in a single moment. He could get so close to her, it was frightening, he once bent over her, head hovering inches from her face. But he couldn't. He loved her too much for that.
When Sarah woke, it was strangely dark, her room was a sunny bright place, the first light always shone radiantly through the film of the curtains, but this morning was different. The room was shrouded in a morbid, oppressive darkness. She sat up puzzled, confused, thinking she must of woke in the depth of the night, she reached out for her alarm clock, but found nothing there. Just yet more quilted covers. It was then that she began to get scared, when a notion of fear possessed her. What's going on? She shuffled from under the covers, and it was then that she realised this wasn't her bed. She wasn't even in her room, there were no teddies or books positioned regimentally in their alcoves, she was far, far from home. Walls of stone and ancient tattered drapes were hanging from a high ceiling, the room felt skeletal and bare, it was cold, so very cold, and how Sarah shivered. She found the most frightening aspect of the room in that it was possessed of no marks of it's owner, a dead room. She looked down – and became aware that she was fully dressed. Wearing exactly the same blouse, waistcoat and jeans she had worn when running the Labyrinth. When looking for Toby.
It all came back to her in a ghastly rush, the time. Oh God, have I got any time left? Where am I? How did I get here? Her head was in a spin, she ran to the door, crying out her brother's name, but stopped short when she saw him, veiled by the shadows, observing each of her moves with a fervent intensity.
"You! Where's by brother, where's Toby?" She ran towards him in confrontation, prepared to do anything to reclaim her brother, she still had time, she was sure of it. Such a childish certainty. A certainty dashed by Jareth giving her a slight, wicked, smile. Her heart sank, heavy with a hideous sense of foreboding.
"It's all over now Sarah. Your time is gone, look," he waved his hand towards the horribly familiar clock face. The time read just past the thirteenth hour. She began shaking her head in disbelief, over and over and over. No, no, no, no.
"Your lying. You must be, y-your trying to trick me!" Her voice wavered in the disbelief, the awful surge of guilt. He moved closer to her, as she took a step back.
"I may manipulate, I may be cruel, but I do not lie. The time you see before you is the truth. You've lost little girl." Her body was still shaking furiously, mouth motioning noiselessly.
"Tell me where Toby is!" She had to know, even if the truth was as awful as she anticipated, he stayed silent, deterring his response for stifling seconds, "for pity's sake tell me!"
"The baby is perfectly safe, lower your tone."
"You mean he's still human? You haven't made him a Goblin?"
"No." She stared at him in wondrous disbelief. What on earth is he doing? Making some bizarre show of compassion?
"But you said you were going to turn him into a Goblin!" She paused, thinking it over furiously, "unless...unless you can't...you can't can you? That's why!" Her enthusiasm was pitiable, Jareth's face remained the same in it's certainty, strong and sure. Not a trace of defeat.
"Your making assertions. Assumptions with no grounding. You have no idea of my reasons, if you wish to know my motivations, ask me."
"Why? Tell me why." He held back his answer once more, seeming to gain a twisted amusement from her discomfort, as her eyes grew wider. "Please?"
"Now you're asking the right questions. I have not turned him into one of my own so as to offer you the chance to return him home."
"You'll set him free? You really meant it? What do you want, I don't have much, but my dad has, he'll..." she stopped herself. She had no idea what her father would do if she returned home claiming Toby had been kidnapped by the Goblin King. He'll probably think I've gone insane...
"Oh you have plenty. You see, it's you that I want." She froze.
"What did you say?"
"You. I want you. Stay here, with me, and your brother will be returned safely." He spoke as if his request was reasonable, the most natural thing in the world. He took another step closer.
"What on earth could you want with me? Turn me into a Goblin? I guess if that's what it takes...I'd never get over it if I went free by giving Toby in exchange for my freedom..." She had never had to make such a painful decision, she was close to tears at the thought of just how much she was loosing. It scared her to think of being turned into one of those hideous beasts, but at least she would not be riddled with guilt for Toby. Toby would still have his future. She'd turned from him, staring blankly at the wall, she couldn't believe what it had come to. Poor little Sarah, already overcome by the prospect of such a future, totally unprepared for the proposition of another. Jareth approached her silently from behind, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist, twisting her around to face him.
"You truly do not understand do you my darling? Look into my eyes, so you shall have no reason to dismiss my words as lies or trickery. I love you. Why do you think I answered your pleas, danced with you in my arms, brought you here to my bed? Love." She stared up at him for a moment, terror illuminating her eyes, vision swimming. It was all too much, all far too much too soon. She felt so useless after, fainting, loosing all awareness. Just dropping limply in his arms, he'd lifted her up and sat with her on the bed, just treasuring each desperate moment of closeness.
She'd woken and screamed, cried and wept. Fury and passion incarnate. She was terrified of him. Terror of a villain is understandable, for cruelty inspires fear, but loose fear of love from the villain is so twisted. So very wrong. It took time for her to regain her composure, for him to shake some sense of reason into her, to briefly overcome the all encompassing hate. She began questioning him once more, her back pressed against a corner, so he could not take her from behind.
"Why me? Why out of everyone did you have to choose me?" The tears were fast returning. She just couldn't understand. He was the villain of the piece, he shouldn't love her, it was tearing her in two with her desperate attempts to understand. Hate for her, lust for her even, would be infinitely preferable to his love. For either would give her utter terror of him grounding.
"Love and the reasons behind it can not be expressed in words, calm yourself. There are things we must discuss."
"What things?"
"Well, primarily our marriage. You do not believe you are to stay here, unmarried? You are to be my wife, my queen, by my side for always." The dizziness returned, but she held her senses, as Jareth edged closer sensing her weakness, a failing she was determined not to allow to overpower her.
"And I don't have a choice? No choice at all?" There was such a strain in her voice, trying desperately to restrain herself from the tears that were rising so steadily.
"Not unless you wish for your poor, innocent babe of a brother to be turned into a repulsive Goblin. No, you do not."
"What about my family? Won't I even be able to see them?" Sarah thought of them all at home. All times of such happiness, such frivolous joy. She remembered her father, the way he called her his 'baby,' and the way she'd protest at such childish endearments whilst retaining that buzz of warmth from the show of such immense love. He had to let her see him again, he had to have some sense of pity.
"You won't need them, my angel, for you shall have me." That's a no then. Her heart sank yet further. She remained silent for a while, quietly thinking of how to deny the inevitable for just a little while longer. Going through what else she needed to know.
"How did I get here Jareth? The last thing I remember was eating that peach, but that was in the woods. How did I get here?" She waved about the room that her presence in was so utterly wrong. Her eyes lingered on the bed awhile, transfixed by what she knew was to become her bridal bed. He looked awkward, for a brief moment his sureness vanished. She however, insisted on his answer, "tell me!"
"I brought you. Do not chide me Sarah, nor do I wish for you to repeat your signature cry, life is not fair my fairy, and that is a lesson you badly need to learn."
"You cheated! If it wasn't for you I would of won! I would of beaten you, but you couldn't bear that could you!" She could hardly believe her own foolishness. Stupid, stupid, Sarah! She hated herself, for her human desires, for ever being tempted by that damned peach. Such a little thing meant her future being snatched from her, meant her becoming some kind of bizarre adornment to Jareth's victory.
"I would of made certain you were not triumphant. You stood little chance. Now, I grant you a final question of me, then you will do as I say."
She stood thinking. Thinking of what she wanted most of all. Thinking of her last expression of freedom. "If Toby's still here, I want to see him, take me to him."
"A wise request. And one that I can comply to, take my hand," he held out his gloved hand to her and hesitantly she placed her shaking fingers within his palm. He immediately gripped hold of it with a horrifying intensity. He was so strong, she could of whimpered from the crushing pain. But she was not going to reward him with any more displays of frivolous passion. He was not deserving of them.
He led her swiftly from the chamber through a series of hopelessly complicated passageways. If she were to run from him, she would be more lost than she already was. There were portraits scattered about the desolate halls, some of girls not that much older than herself, she noted how all their faces were adorned with a stony seriousness, none gave a whisper of a smile. Some of them, to her horror, had infants swaddled in their arms. The prospect of such a fate terrified Sarah, she couldn't bear to think of it. She could not stop herself from asking if they had ever felt her fear, her awful sense of loss. I wonder if they ever felt what I feel now?
They moved silently, the King occasionally chancing to take a look upon his soon to be bride, as if to reassure himself she had not been snatched from him, to loose himself in the ecstasy of her being so very near. Her face was held low, or turned from him to look at the misty eyed portraits that lined the walls. All he wished for now was for her to look at him, for her to love him as he loved her. He came close to seizing hold of her slender pallid neck and twisting her face to look upon him, but he needed no such ferocity now. For he had time.
Toby was in the throne room, sat at the feet of the dais, he looked up curiously as Sarah came running, held out his chubby arms in anticipation of an embrace. She picked him up and held him tightly as she planted incessant kisses on his scalp. "I'm so sorry Toby, I love you. I really do, I love you, I love you, I love you." He seemed to be aware of the solemnity of the situation, Sarah's tears drew wails of his own. She remained with him for an hour of more, continuing to coddle the child, playing silly childish games with him, snatching at chances that before she had always rejected.
She shuddered when Jareth came behind her and rested his hands heavy on her shoulders, "It's time to bid farewell to your past Sarah." She shook her head one last time, continuing her defiance of her impossible reality.
"If you truly loved me, you wouldn't be making me do this," he stayed silent. For he had no answer. He reached out his arms for Toby, face silent and forbidding. Sarah refused him, drawing the baby yet closer to her breast. "I don't trust you. Show your love for me Jareth, show it's sincerity, by letting me take Toby back. At least that way I'll know for certain I haven't submitted to you for nothing."
"As you wish," he beckoned her close and she strode eyes closed to her place besides him. With the muttering of a few words, and a flourish of his cloak, all were returned to Sarah's parent's chamber.
It was raining outside. The blows drumming heavy on the windowpane. All was just as it had been left, Lancelot still lay discarded on the bed, Toby's crib remained eerily empty, beckoning to it's owner. She gave Toby a final kiss before returning him to his cushioned crib, he refused to settle, and Sarah's chided him mechanically for being the instigator of such discord. When he finally went quiet she cried softly for the loss of such earthly mundaneity. She gazed, eyes empty about the room, sighting everything she knew so painfully well for one final time. She heard her parent's voices chatting absently in the hall below, she felt like screaming for help, running to her father's ready arms, clinging to him in utter despondency. But knew it was far, far too late for that now.
"Will they remember me?" Jareth approached her, taking her hand in his, there was no pain now, he was impossibly gentle, as if restraining his power. All for her.
"No. It would be...problematic to allow you to remain as a ghost in their memories, distressing, and you wouldn't want that for them would you my sweetheart?" He lent his face into her hair, such a blissful closeness for him. So very terrible for her.
With a flash of lightening, both were gone. Toby's face was illuminated by the glare, wailing uncontrollably.
Now, this is my first piece of mega dramatic, trying-desperately-hard-not-include-comedy piece, I think it worked okay. I hope you all enjoy reading it! This was, of all places, written in the car during a long, long journey to the shopping centre, I got bored and so whilst listening to angsty music on my MP3 player wrote this.
This piece is trying very hard to be intense, bleak, melachony etc.which is why I'm rating it T to be safe. This is a one shot. And in case anyone's interessted, the various endearments Jareth refers to Sarah by are nearly all taken from what Mr Rochester says to the title charecter in Jane Eyre, as you might guess, I'm something of a Bronte fan!
Oh yes, I will be taking a break from all writng except Simplicity's diary, the next chapter of which is finished and will be posted tomorrow.
I only find out how well it worked and whether people enjoyed it or not through reviews (and this is very experiemntal so reviews are important to me with this one), so please let me know what you think!