Dear Aliens

Author's Foreword:

I was really bored one day and started randomly thinking about Sunstreaker ... then I started role-playing him ... and then I came up with this ...

Dear Aliens,

We don't really care who or what you are or your name and why you came to Earth but if you don't stop with all of this domination stuff, we are going to be rather quite pissed! I mean it was one thing to enslave humans -that happens to them every other week, actually- but it is unacceptable to blow up entire cities, no matter if they are abandoned! I was planning to make New Jersey into a little haven for myself, but no thanks to your unfabulous dark plasma cannon thingies, I have to pick another location! Do you have any idea how long that will take? I have to figure out the right temperature, the right humidity, amount of sunlight, distance to headquarters, population density, popularity of the region, car service professionalism, like, a million other things!

In any case, yes, chill out or I will get Warpath to bombard you with cryoshots and then I will get someone to serve you as the cube of ice in my high-grade!

Another thing! What is it with you, alien races, and enslavement of the humans? I get that you want power and resources, but for crying out loud, there are tons of other more developed and less dumbaft races out there! I mean, look at the human media called The Internet! That thing sent my circuits scrambling and I am still having trouble sorting out my databanks! Just read some fanfiction and you will see what I am talking about, and if you really want to get scarred for life just watch that video about a cup and two girls! It has been years and I still can't eat chocolate or any ice-cream to that matter!

You think you can conquer Earth? Let's say you get past their defenses (which are just as easy to penetrate as Firestar or Tracks), then you will need to face us. Take a very close look at Megatron. How many times has he won against us? Zero. Let's compare you and him, all right?

You tried to our disrupt energy supply and failed. Megatron stole a lot of energy and undermines our attempts to make better sources of energy and is partially successful. You started your invasion two days ago and you haven't even taken over a single city, while Megatron sent us towards the sun at eleven in the morning and had energon tea served to him by heads of United Nations by noon. You brought your fleet; Megatron brought a planet over. You got multiple arms; Soundwave has tentacles. You planted a few trees here and there; Megatron tried turning all of Earth into metal. You tried biological weaponry; Megatron brought the cosmic rust. You are green little things; Megatron is a big aft robot that would squish you and not even notice.

Look, if you came before the nineteen eighties when we were awakened, we wouldn't mind, but since you are blowing things up right now, I have to break away from some very serious business (I got a dent no thanks to Sideswipe trying out the nun-chucks) and devote my precious time to beating the scrap out of you. Urgh, just knowing that these scratches are there is already driving me crazy!

Don't make me crazy, you won't like me when I am crazy.

So yes, leave and stop wasting my time! I don't exactly have self-waxing plating!

Hate you all,

Sunstreaker.

P.S. Frag you.

P.P.S. Frag you again.

Author's Notes:

Those aliens got some mail to read~!

Hope you guys liked!

Don't be shy and leave a review!