What's up everybody? I hope your day is going good.
Because mine could definitely better. In case you haven't read the summary, I made this to the people who have made my childhood (technically I am still a child, 15 isn't too old) a living hell. You know who I am talking about.
The people who keep sexualizing my favorite cartoon characters. Like stop. Stop it, get some help.
I have a list of movies and video games that have been ruined because some people just couldn't keep it in their heads.
So in order to address this probably, I will have Diante sing about our frustrations.
Also if you want a better idea of what I am talking about, look up "Quackity horrible fandoms". Quackity is a Youtube and he has made a music video that is much like this one. He is great.
Rated M for references. Just to be on the safe side.
And Diante is my OC from my Rio 3 Remastered story. He is a red and green macaw who happens to be Blu's brother so I'm just putting that out there (*cough shameless advertising)
Diante takes the stage with a guitar in his wings. He doesn't talk to the audience. He merely starts playing the guitar. After a while he sings.
"One day I was looking up fanfiction for my favorite things
When I came across some art that showed me… a lot of things
Now I can't watch the movie without questioning if I'm turning gay
So I came up with this song to saaaaaay!
Why did you write that?
Why did you draw that?
Why did you have to create that?
No one likes YAOI
No likes Hentai
I think I might need a lifeline
Why did you write that?
Why did you draw that?
Why did you have to create that?
No one likes YAOI
No likes Hentai
I think I might need a lifeline
I don't know why I try
I must take out my eyes
Why did you write that?
Why did you make that?
Please. Just tell me. I need a answer. Now I am just sad.
These are the movies that I grew up watching
These are the TV shows I loved and adored.
now I can't watch it forever more.
You make me sick to the coooooore!
The audience have now starting to clap and sing along with Diante
Now everytime I watch Shrek, I think of a sexy ogre (I'm not gay!)
I think this stinks, like putrid body odor.
I can't watch HTTYD without thinking of bestiality (I'm not demented!)
So I ask you people, where is your humanity?
I hope you find it. Because if you don't, this world will suck. Like a lot. You can't do this.
Why did you write that?
Why did you draw that?
Why did you have to create that?
No one likes YAOI
No likes Hentai
I think I might need a lifeline
Why did you write that?
Why did you draw that?
Why did you have to create that?
No one likes YAOI
No likes Hentai
I think I might need a lifeline
I don't know why I try
I must take out my eyes
Why did you write that?
How to train your dragon fans! Make some noise if your movie was ruined by these people!
Audience screams out loud
Okay, that's a lot of people.
Rio fans, make some noise if your movie was ruined!
Screaming and shouting, people waving their hands in the air.
O-okay. Zootopia-
REEEEEEEEEEEE!
Wow, that is a lot of people. Ice age?
SCREEEEEAAAM
Alright. God almighty. I didn't even know…
Now for the next part of our song.
No ( Blu x Nigel)
No (Jewel x Nico)
No (Hiccup x Toothless)
No (Blu x Roberto)
No ( Judy hops x Nick)
No (Elsa x Olaf)
No (Stormfly x Astrid)
No (Anime fans can fill the rest in. I am sure they know a lot)
Noooooo!
No
No
No
No
No
No
No
No
No
Noooooo!
Why did you write that?
Why did you draw that?
Why did you have to create that?
No one likes YAOI
No likes Hentai
I think I might need a lifeline
Why did you write that?
Why did you draw that?
Why did you have to create that?
No one likes YAOI
No likes Hentai
I think I might need a lifeline
I don't know why I try
I must take out my eyes
Why did you write that?
Why did you make that."
Diante finishes. The audience bursts in a fit of tears of joy. He looks at his phone.
"WHAT? CARS? HOW? HOOOOOOW!? WHY, I am so sad."
# Make Fandoms Great Again
This is just a joke Don't take anything seriously. Except for this next line:
Don't sexualize characters made for kids. Just stop it. It isn't cool.
The reason why this hit so close to home for me is because I joined the Fanfiction site when I was eleven. I happened to stumble upon it after I was looking for Rio 3. I am 15 now. Think of the kids who could be on the site, and you ruined the movie for them.
Now thankfully, being a pretty happy-go-lucky 11 year old boy, I saw that stuff but it didn't make me dislike the movie. I understood that whatever they drew was that, and the movie was different. But there are other people out there who might not understand. And plus, they're just kids.
So please. Stop.