I was recently marathoning through the first half of season 2 on DVD last night when my buddy turned to me and asked, "What do you think insurance would be like to live in Metropolis?" In my head, an idea formed for a short one-shot and this is the result. Bibbo Bibbowski is in the show, but I can't include him as a character so Superman is the only tag.
Enjoy!
DCI Insurance Office
Metropolis
2:27 p.m.
Bo "Bibbo" Bibbowski was not having a good day. It first started with a very irate customer who refused to pay his tab and ran out of the diner. Then Bibbo found his car had a flat tire. By the time he gotten it fixed, Superman and Metallo were going at it yet again in downtown Metropolis. Like the rest of the citizens, Bibbo was evacuated swiftly by the police who had long since perfected their response to Superman's epic brawls. The fight lasted three hours and when Bibbo finally made it back to his diner he found his car had been flattened by the Daily Planet globe and his diner was in flames. And that was yesterday.
Today, Bibbo found himself sitting in an insurance office while the agent reviewed his claim. The agent in charge of the claim was a small man; someone who Bibbo guessed had never done a truly hard day's work in his life. While the man moved his glasses up his nose Bibbo let him know of his growing impatience.
"Look, Mr. Anderson. I've been getting the run around all day. I've sat in four offices just like this one, each telling me that I have the wrong form or I 'm on the wrong floor. And there are hundreds of other people getting the same damn treatment. So what is the goddamn holdup?"
Mr. Anderson put the form down to address Bibbo. "These claims you've filed over the past few years have been raising some very serious eyebrows Mr. Bibbowski. Nine months ago, you said your truck was turned to ash by Atomic Skull. Three weeks later, you claimed that your house was cut in half by one of Toyman's lasers. And there a nearly a dozen claims leading up to those you've filed today. Quite frankly, we are not sure we are going to be able to continue your coverage."
Bibbo's eye twitched as the little man spoke. He really wanted to show this Anderson fool what an old boxer could do with his hands when given the proper motivation, but he restrained himself. Taking a deep breath, he steadied himself to give the Anderson a piece of his mind. "Look, I'm paying over 3,000 in premiums a year to cover things like this. And if you all of a sudden are claiming that your 'superhero insurance plan' won't cover the fallout from guys like Superman, then what's stopping me from suing your ass into oblivion?"
Mr. Anderson paled slightly at the mention of the word 'sue'. He quickly grabbed a stamp marked 'approved' and slammed the paper, leaving the word in red. "Very well, Mr. Bibbowski. Your claim has been approved. You may go."
Bibbo shook his head and nearly thought about ranting a little more, but thought better of it and left the insurance company without further incident. The one thing Bibbo thought as he boarded the bus home as that the world still wasn't able to really handle the fallout from all these superheroes and supervillains, and he doubted it ever really would.
I know it was super short, but I hope you enjoyed it regardless.