Bella's Reverie

Description: This is a one-shot about Bella's reaction after Edward leaves her during New Moon. It's my first Fanfic so let me know what I should improve on. Review Please! (Rated T)

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Edward is gone. His love for me is no more. I guess I was too boring and plain to interest him. I should just be happy with the glorious, too-short months I had with him.

I still can't believe it.

Edward is gone. Life seems bleak and meaningless without him. Hanging out with Jacob has helped me finally have the ability to face thinking about him.

I can still remember his heavenly voice saying those harsh words combined with his cold eyes breaking my heart beyond repair.

I'm tired of pretending to be something I'm not, Bella. I am not human. I've let this go on much too long and I'm sorry for that.

Hearing those words so clearly in my head broke open the dam of memories I'd worked so hard to block out.

Memories of the blissful times with Edward washed over me finally ending with us standing at the edge of the forest on that fateful day that changed my life forever.

I promise that this will be the last time you'll see me…It will be as if I never existed.

I could feel my face crumpling into a bottomless bottle of pain that left me breathless. Dizzy, crouching on the floor of my room, I stayed.

Thinking of his beautiful yet alien face…his golden eyes looking upon me with love, his marble-like cold body with its vampiric strength, and that heart-wrenching crooked smile of his that I loved oh so much.

Even if I am able to live through the loss of him, my chosen way of life, and the rest of the Cullens I'd come to love…I know that I will always love him like no other.

The sound of footsteps up the stairs, on that annoyingly loud creaky step jarred me out of my reverie.

"Bella! I'm home."

I sighed. It seems like life really does go on even when one's life has been shattered like the pieces of a priceless vase.

Reluctantly, I went downstairs to warm up the dinner and placed it onto table waiting for Charlie's return.

I spent the next two hours dithering around trying not to fall asleep. I finished my Calculus homework and even did some extra things to waste time. I was that desperate.

Finally, I tore a piece of paper out of my binder and poured my feelings onto it:

Emotions spilling out onto this paper, with this blotted ink, like blood dripping from me. With every printed word, I lose some of me. My life slips by and soaks into yesterday…leaving only tomorrow a faded outline of who I was. Today is my sponge, absorbing all of my colors, all my hues. And so I sleep today into yesterday's abyss…

The glaring red numbers on my digital clock told me that it was 2:30 in the morning. Tired yet satisfied, seeing the words from inside my head on paper, feeling the cool breeze and listening to the fluttering curtains of the once closed window finally led me into a peaceful, oblivious sleep…