Unleash your imagination
Zoro was enjoying himself with a bottle of sake and wandering around the streets of a city. This was probably his best day in a very long time. Nothing was ordered by that witch, he didn't have to accompany anyone for anything and neither some one was along with him to bug his brains out and there weren't many people in streets either…actually there weren't any, not even a single one. Well the last part was a little bit suspicious but still, it didn't matter to him. Zoro was just gulping down his booze when he noticed a boy wearing a red shirt blue shorts and strawhat was running towards him in full speed…
Zoro: huh? Luffy? OI LUFFY! (Waving from the distance) WHAT'S THE MATTER? DON'T TELL ME YOU HAVE MARINES ON YOUR TAIL AGAIN…
Luffy noticed Zoro and started waving with his usual wide grin but quickly afterwards remembering something his expression turned to a very serious one. On arriving close to Zoro, Luffy quickly grabbed him by arm and dragged along…
Luffy: Zoro! Trust me…it's not my fault…I don't understand myself what's happening…
Zoro: (now both were running together) but at-least tell me what's going on? Are there marines?
Luffy: no, not the marines, this is way more troublesome than that…and probably you are in same danger as me. Two of us are in most danger right now…
Zoro: wow! I'm surprised that you are scared of something…more importantly…aren't you thinking too hard for yourself?
Luffy: this is no time for jokes Zoro! We are in real trouble…
Zoro: what could it be that even Luffy is scared of?
Just then Zoro heard some screams from behind, first they weren't much audible but slowly became clear…
Luffy: OH SHIT! WE HAVE TO RUN FASTER THEY HAVE CAUGHT UP ALREADY…
Zoro looked behind while running and saw a horde of…girls chasing them? Surprisingly enough there were some familiar faces too…
Zoro: what the hell is going on? OI LUFFY EXPLAIN…
Luffy: I don't know anything…they just started chasing me without any reason…
Zoro: it can't be without a reason… (Pointing to the horde) AND WHY IN THE WORLD THEY ARE IN THEM?
Vivi, Alvida, Conis, Margeret, almost everyone from amazon lily and many other unknown girls were in the crowd…
Luffy: (Almost whining) I told you I don't know anything…
Crowd: ~Luffy please stop we won't hurt you~
Zoro: argh…what the hell is going on? This isn't making any sense…how in the world they all gathered here in the first place? Well… I think they are after you so it doesn't matter to me…
Zoro was about to stop when Luffy suddenly grabbed his arm and forced him to run along…
Luffy: Zoro don't stop…
Zoro: oi! Let me go
Luffy: I told you already…you are in same trouble as me…
Just then a big horde of more girls were standing before them blocking the path…Luffy and Zoro stopped abruptly…
Luffy: OH SHIT! WE ARE SURROUNDED…
Zoro: what the hell?
Luffy: THIS IS THE GROUP AFTER YOU…
Zoro: YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME…
This group consisted of Tashigi, Perona, Bonney and many other unknown girls… crowd was almost as big as the one after Luffy…Zoro and Luffy jumped up on a building's rooftop and landed in another street…
Luffy: DON'T STOP! KEEP RUNNING…
Zoro: WILL YOU PLEASE TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON?
Luffy: oh well! Let's see…hmm…where should I start? Ok then…I was just sitting in a restaurant eating all I could eat buffet…well! For some reason owner was giving me free food…
Zoro: that's because you are a pirate with 400 MILLION BOUNTY…
Luffy: (cleaning his ears) I got it man! Chill out…well then...where was i? Oh yeah! I was eating when a strange girl came and sat beside me and suddenly grabbed my arm…I said to let me go I wanna eat meat but then another girl came and grabbed my other arm too…then in just short time big number of those strange girls came rushing in and jumped at me…I was lucky to get out of there somehow…and everyone else was out there too and before I could ask anything they all jumped at me at same time…
Zoro was looking at Luffy's face with dull eye
Luffy: I'M NOT JOKING, IT'S TRUE
Zoro: ok! Ok! Keep talking…
Luffy: oh yeah! I had no choice but to run and then from behind I heard some girls saying "Zoro is that way! I won't give him to anyone else" and other things like that and then a lot of girls started to run in a different direction…
Zoro: (with dull eyes) I don't know what in the bloody hell author is thinking but this is going to be the lamest idea anyone could think of…
Luffy: I also want to know why he is doing this…
Zoro: why don't you ask him yourself?
Luffy: yeah! I thought of that but he is totally cracked up to answer anything (scene is turned to the author and…)
Author: MUHAHAHAHAHA…HAHAHA…MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA… (Back to running Luffy and Zoro)
Zoro: well…!... (dull eyes and major sweat drop)…whatever…but still! Why we are the only ones?
Suddenly they heard a familiar scream and Luffy and Zoro crashed in Sanji incoming from adjacent street…probably Sanji was running on his full speed too…They noticed closing up danger and quickly got back on run again…
Zoro: (talking to Sanji) I'm surprised that you are running from them
Sanji: what do you mean?
Luffy: yeah! You are always running after them, shouldn't you be happy?
Sanji: SHUT UP YOU MORONS! YOU TRYING TO MAKE FUN OF ME? I NEVER RAN AFTER THEM…I WAS ALWAYS RUNNING AWAY FROM THEM AND EVEN NOW…
Surprised a little bit all of them looked behind and all of them were shocked as hell…
Ivanko: HEEHAW! AFTER HIM MY CANDY BOYS! HEEHAW!
Vivi: ~Luffy! Why are you running away, stop~
Tashigi: stop running Roronoa
Luffy, Zoro and Sanji in unison: WHAT THE HELL?
Luffy: WHAT IS IVA-CHAN AND ALL THOSE PEOPLE FROM IMPEL DOWN DOING HERE?
Sanji: they are after me…and by the way (Sanji started spinning at same speed) ~~is Vivi-chwan, Conis-chwan, that mysterious beauty from logue town and other ladies after me too?~~
Luffy: nope! They are after me…
Sanji: WHAT?...and that cutie-chan from thriller bark and that pretty marine lady and other girls?
Zoro: they are after me…
Sanji: WHAT THE HELL? (Sanji got in his burning mode) YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. WHY YOU TWO ALWAYS GET THE GIRLS WHILE THERE ARE ONLY THOSE MONSTERS FOR ME?
Zoro: we don't know the reason why they are after us so just stop babbling…you are pissing me off …
Sanji: (flames got even more intense) EH? I'M THE ONE WHO IS PISSED HERE… (With dark clouds on his head) all of my angels… *sob* (wiping his eyes) it's ok! I just know that Nami-swan and Robin-chwan loves me and only me…
Zoro: this one is even more cracked-up than the author…
Luffy: I think I agree…
After a while they turned to an alley and there was a dead end…everyone's jaws dropped in horror but before this nightmare could come true
Sanji: SHUT UP YOU RETARD! THIS IS A NIGHTMARE ONLY FOR ME…
…anyway a window of nearby building opened…
Nami: Luffy, Zoro, Sanji-kun…hurry up this way…
Nami, Robin, Chopper and Ussop were in the building…
Sanji: ~SEE THAT? NAMI-SWAN AND ROBIN-CHWAN HAS COME TO SAVE ME~
Nami: Yes! Yes! Now hurry up before they see us…
All of them jumped in the building and they closed the window properly went inside to another room and Brook and Franky were sitting there drinking tea casually…
Zoro: what is this place?
Nami: just an abandoned house…
Luffy: Does anyone know what's going on?
Nami: yes! And chopper will explain it…
Everyone looked at Chopper…
Chopper: Well! I have already explained everything except you three…
Nami: It wouldn't hurt to explain once again…
Chopper: *sigh* well! This is too lame …I feel like an idiot while just explaining…
Nami: and that's why no one else wants to do it…
Chopper: I guess I have no choice…ok! Listen carefully. Everyone outside chasing after you is infected by a virus, due to its nature of working I think we should call it 'fan-girl virus'…
A massive and stupid awkwardness and even more awkward silence filled the room…Zoro's only useable eye was twitching, Sanji's mouth was wide open and luffy was just confused…
Chopper: precisely saying they are all your fan-girls and since there are only girls I guess the virus attacks only girls and is controlling their minds to get ones they like with force…
Zoro: I knew it, this was the lamest idea anyone would ever come up with…ARE YOU KIDDING ME? IS THIS GINTAMA? HOW IN THE FUCKING WORLD THAT SORT OF VIRUS CAN EXIST?
Sanji had fallen on the floor with very thick clouds of depression…
Sanji: why? Why this happens to me? does that mean all those girls out there are luffy and zoro's fan-girls? and why only okama's are after me? (Bursting in flames again) I DON'T ACCEPT THAT EXPLANATION, WHAT ABOUT THOSE MONSTERS WHO ARE AFTER ME? THEY ARE NOT GIRLS…
Robin: it is said that they have maiden hearts
Sanji: (anime tears) ~Robin-chwaaaaan! Not you toooooo…~
Luffy: I don't get it…
They didn't had enough time cause Elizabeth found them inside the building…
Elizabeth: Everyone! They are in here…
Zoro: oh shit!
Everyone jumped out of another window which opened in Main Street and they started running again followed by the horde while Franky, Ussop and Brook were still calmly sipping their tea…
Franky: ah! Freshness, by the way there is no one chasing after us…it's ok right?
Brook: ah! Yes there is no one…
Ussop: well! Its better that we are safe…
Franky: yes! It's better (taking another sip suddenly he sent the table before him flying) LIKE HELL ITS OK! WHY THE 'SUPA' ME HAVE NO FAN-GIRLS?
Brook: (he was also angry) YES! WHY? SOUL KING WANT TO SEE PANTIES…
Ussop: wow! *sigh* you guys are not any better…
Except the three inside everyone else is running from the crowd of crazy fan-girls…
Zoro: still! 'Fan-girl virus'? This is too lame…
Chopper: well! It isn't happened to any man yet so it got to be for females only…
Nami: *sigh* I'm relieved it wasn't a 'fan-boy virus'…other wise we had to run from a horde of boys
Sanji: ANYONE TRY TO DO THAT WILL FACE MY WRATH
Zoro: shut up already…
Robin: I know it sounds idiotic but you are not the only ones…
Zoro: what do you mean?
Robin: some time ago I received the information that Trafalgar Law, Juracle Mihawk, Eustass Kidd, Marco, Smoker and some others are in same problem…and most of them have already been caught
Sanji: and…what happened to them?
Nami: imagine one and only piece of a giant teddy bear in a shop and many little girls want it, they all jump at it same time…what would be the result?
Luffy, Zoro, Sanji: *GULP*
Luffy: good thing Ace is already dead…
Chopper: I think that happened to Beppo…but he's still in one piece though… I would have ended the same way but I was saved…
Luffy: what? They were after you too?
Chopper: actually…the ones after me were all mixed up…I mean old, young, good looking, not so good looking… all of them…
Nami: but I still don't get one thing…
Sanji: what's that Nami-san?
Nami: if it's about girls who like someone then aren't we missing someone who should be here running after Luffy?
Sanji: who?
Nami: Hancock you bonehead, Boa Hancock…
Sanji: oh I forgot! SHE LIKES LUFFY TOO? I'M GONNA KILL THIS SHITTY RUBBER-MAN
Just then they noticed a dead end approaching…
Luffy: oh no we are trapped…
Zoro: use your gear third idiot…
Luffy: oh yeah…
Before he could do anything cracks started to appear in the wall and it crumbled to pieces and after a moment later an angelic figure of a women with 'long flowing hair, blue eyes with depth of an ocean, and beauty at par to a goddess's' appeared…!...whatever...
Sanji: ~MELLORINE~
Sanji was turned to stone and Nami and Robin were surprised while Luffy, Zoro and Chopper had no effect at all…
Nami: oh no! This is bad…this will be a big problem
Robin: Well! She is a Sichibukai after all
Hancock: ~Luffy~ hurry up keep running…
Everyone: WHAT?
Nami: Aren't you after Luffy?
Hancock: what do you mean? Why I have to run after my own husband?
Nami: HE'S NOT YOUR HUSBAND
Hancock: anyway…I know everything and I'm not infected just keep moving now…
Chopper: (Sanji was still stoned) Sanji! You can't afford it at this time…
After Sanji's recovery everyone started running again
Luffy: wow! Hancock you saved me once again, you always appear to help me one way or other, I'm so thankful
Hancock: (blushing and turning her eyes away) it was nothing Luffy, I'll do anything for you…(wondering) was that a proposal for marriage?
Nami: NO IT WASN'T…*sigh* anyway…why aren't you infected?
Hancock: its because I'm not a fan of luffy…I love him
Nami: lame…doesn't make any sense
Luffy: oi Hancock! I said that I don't want to get married yet…
Hancock: ~oh Luffy! I love this indifferent attitude of yours~
Sanji was running at the end of the group with thick gloomy clouds
Zoro: they are all idiots…whatever!So Chopper! How were you saved? I mean what is the cure?
Everyone's attention turned to little reindeer…well he was in his Reindeer form so he wasn't little anymore
Chopper: Well! …I was running too when Doctorine found me and she just kissed me in front of every one then something came out of their mouths and they fell unconscious then she explained everything to me…I know it sounds too stupid but this is true…
Zoro: and…what does…that mean?
Chopper: well…*blink**blink*… you have to kiss a girl who is not infected in front of everyone…
AFTER ANOTHER 'A LITTLE BIT LONG' AWKWARD SILENCE…
Zoro: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS AUTHOR? HE'S JUST PLAYING WITH US, ISN'T HE?
Robin: We can't blame him "unleash your imagination" is motto of this site, so he is doing whatever is popping up in his mind
Zoro: TOTALLY CRACKED UP MIND…AND BECAUSE OF THAT STUPID MOTTO WE ARE BEING SCREWED OVER AND OVER BY THOUSANDS OF WRITERS, I'M GONNA CUT THIS EXCUSE FOR AN AUTHOR TO MILLION PIECES
Luffy: calm down Zoro we just have to kiss right?
Zoro: WHAT?
Luffy: and I think one is better than hundreds
Zoro: …you're right at that one…BUT STILL… IT'S TOO LAME…
Sanji: ~Mellorine! You are great mister author now Nami-swan and Robin-chwan will kiss me to save me from those monsters~
Nami: (punching Sanji) no we won't
Robin: there is one more thing, Chopper please explain that too…
Chopper: *sigh* in my case there were women of all ages and types so even an old woman like Doctorine was good enough…
Sanji: what are you trying to say?
Chopper: for example, in your case Sanji! Ones who are chasing you are okamas, so you have to kiss an okama who isn't infected…
Nightmare, this finally somewhat happy feeling dream turned to a nightmare for Sanji and light which felt like brightness of heaven turned to electrical discharges and hot fire of hell
Sanji: arrrgh…WHY ME? WHY THIS HAS TO HAPPEN TO ME? WHAT DID I EVER DO TO HIM TO END UP THIS WAY? YOU STUPID AUTHOR, WHAT KIND OF SHITTY, BASELESS, IDIOTIC, LAME AND UNIMAGINATIVE IDEA IS THIS? OI ZORO JUST THIS ONCE I'M WITH YOU TO CUT THIS BASTARD IN PIECES WITH MY NEW KITCHEN KNIVES AND MAKE SUSHI OUT OF HIM…(instead of a positive response Sanji was shocked to see Zoro's reaction)
Zoro: HAHAHAHA! THIS IS TOO MUCH! SERVES YA RIGHT YOU PERVERTED LOVE-COOK, HAHAHAHAHA…
Sanji: SHUT UP YOU BASTARD…
Ignoring the idiots…
Hancock: (blushing heavily) L-Luffy…! S-shall I k-kiss you?
Luffy: well! That's the only way so…ok
Nami: no you won't…
Everyone was looking at Nami now…
Nami: I'm the one who will kiss Luffy…
Everyone was shocked to hear this
Sanji: Nami-swan…why? YOU SHITTY GOMU…
Hancock: what are you saying? I'm the one who love Luffy and I'm not giving him to anyone else
Nami: well I'm his navigator and I'm not giving my one piece to anyone else…
Zoro: So that's what you are after?
Nami: SHUT UP! Besides I am with him for a very long time than you…
Hancock: that doesn't matter at all! You just want treasure, I don't care for treasure I just want Luffy…
Nami: no! I want treasure and Luffy…
Zoro: you are being too greedy as always
Nami: YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH!
Chopper: I'm surprised why they aren't infected yet…
Raobin: maybe they already have…
Chopper: …O.O(wondering) no! no! they aren't…
By now Hancock was pulling luffy by his left and Nami was pulling him by his right arm while still running from crowd and Luffy was being dragged on road
Luffy: this isn't any better you know…I have an idea...
Nami: what kind of idea could possibly you come up with?
Luffy: that was rude Nami! Anyway… how about you both kiss me… and we will wait till the end of manga to decide who I should marry…
Sanji: YOU SHITTY BASTARD I'LL KILL YOU…
Only reason why Sanji couldn't do anything right now was those monsters chasing him and he didn't had enough time to jump at Luffy and strangle him to death…
Nami: I think I agree
Zoro: THAT'S IT WITH THE FIGHT?
Hancock: just this once, otherwise Luffy is mine and just mine…
Nami: we will see about that…
Then they stopped running and Nami and Hancock quickly kissed luffy on either of his cheeks and surprisingly enough horde after Luffy stopped chasing him and just like Chopper said they fell unconscious after something jumped out of there mouths…
Zoro: IT REALLY WORKED?
Sanji: I'LL KILL THAT BASTARD WITH MY OWN HANDS…JUST YOU WAIT YOU DICKHEAD…
Now only Zoro, Sanji, Chopper and Robin were running being pursued by Zoro's group and okamas…Zoro turned his face forward and started sweating heavily…
Zoro: damn! This isn't good, this stupid cracked up author is pulling me in this situation on purpose…do I really have no other choice? Damn it!
Chopper: come on Zoro! We already know what's next…
Sanji: DON'T YOU DARE MARIMO OR I'LL HAUNT YOU EVEN AFTER MY DEATH…
Zoro: I DON'T HAVE OTHER CHOICE IDIOT *GULP* R-Robin…
Robin: yes?
Sanji: NO ROBIN-CHAN, YOU CAN'T BETRAY MY LOVE…
Chopper: SHUT UP! YOU ARE NOT MAKING ANY SENSE…YOU HAVE YOUR OWN PROBLEMS TO WORRY ABOUT…
Zoro: DAMN! THIS IDIOT IS SURELY ANNOYING AS HELL…*sigh* Robin…you know already, don't try to play dumb…
Robin: what could you possibly mean by that?
Zoro: arrgh…this woman is playing with me now…SAVE MY LIFE DAMMIT
Robin: (with a smirk) and how can I do that?
Zoro: aaaaaarrrrrrrghhhh…I can clearly see that smirk and that cunning look…alright! Have it your way…ROBIN…KISS ME…
She didn't expect this kind of reaction…
Robin: (turning her eyes away and forming a cute smile) oh Zoro! You are so bold
Zoro: (with wide eyes) THIS IS NO TIME FOR JOKES…
Robin: very well!
Then they stopped running and kissed passionately and kept kissing until all the girls chasing Zoro fell unconscious and now only Sanji was running because Chopper was tired now
Sanji: WHAT THE HELL BASTARD! IT COULD'VE BEEN JUST A PECK ON CHEEK…YOU PERVERTED MARIMO…
Zoro: yeah! Yeah whatever! (Robin just giggled still in Zoro's embrace)
Sanji: I SWEAR IF I EVER GET OUT OF THIS MESS I'LL KILL FOUR MEN FOR SURE…LUFFY, YOU, STUPID AUTHOR OF THIS LAME FANFIC AND ODA…
Just then Sanji tripped over a piece of stone and fell down
Sanji: oh poop!
All okamas jumped at him and Sanji's screams could be heard almost in whole city and just when Sanji was about to be butt-rapped by okamas a bubble popped and Zoro abruptly got up and was sitting on Sunny's deck while breathing heavily…
Zoro: …weird! Creepy! Scary! This was the creepiest dream I ever had…that stupid love-cook must have mixed something in my alcohol again…
Robin: are you okay Zoro?
Zoro: huh? Oh yeah! I'm fine…
Robin: you don't look so good to me
Zoro: I told you I'm fine…
Robin: oh! Well then…I wanted to talk about something
Zoro's only useable eye started twitching again and he asked in an awkward manner
Zoro: what?
Robin sat beside him
Robin: I was wondering that we had so many unique moments…I mean like when Enel electrocuted me and you caught me and when you saved me from Aokiji and at Enies Lobby it was your key which saved me and then I was the only one beside Sanji and Brook who knew about Thriller Bark incident and I tried to save you from Kizaru at Shaboandy but I couldn't and then after two years again you saved me from Hyouzou …(Robin turned her eyes to Zoro who was looking at her awkwardly) what?
Zoro: aren't you speaking too much then usual?
Robin: I'm being forced
Zoro: by whom?
Robin: isn't it obvious?
Zoro: (dull eye) oh yeah! I finally realized…that cracked up author…oh wait a minute, no! What's going on?
Something happened to Zoro and he started speaking again…
Zoro: you know why I did all those things?
Robin: because you love me?
Zoro: exactly
And then they started kissing and making out intensively on Sunny's deck. Nami was standing in lawn and looking at them with wide eyes when Luffy placed his straw hat on Nami's head…
Nami: oh! Luffy? Does this mean you love me?
Luffy: (shrugging) I guess so…
Nami: does it mean that you love Vivi too?
Luffy: (shrugging again) I guess so…
Nami: does it mean Shanks love you too?
Luffy: O.O *blink**blink*…
Nami: does it mean Gol D. Roger loved Shanks too?
Luffy: *blink**blink**blink*…
Nami: does it also mean you love that rock where you placed your hat for two years?
Luffy: ok Nami! You can stop now! This is getting too weird…
Then they also started kissing and making out on Sunny's lawn and suddenly a bubble popped and Sanji shot open his eyes while gasping and shaking heavily
Sanji: damn! What was that? That was even scarier than the two years I spent in that hell. I bet it's because of all those LuffyxNami and ZoroxRobin fanfics I read earlier today. Damn! Why are they more popular than me? I swear if it ever happened I'll quit one piece
Just then another bubble popped and a man opened up his eyes
Oda: weird! That was too weird…I think I should stop giving hints of ZoroxRobin I usually do…I better look out for Sanji…I'm sure he's really pissed…Well! Whatever…
With this Oda went back to sleep again. And that's why there won't be any real pairings on One Piece until they are close to end BUT WHO THE HELL AM I TO SPEAK? I'M A GIGANTIC FAN OF LUFFYXHANCOCK AND ZOROXROBIN MYSELF…HAHAHAHA…JUST UNLEASH YOUR IMAGINATION, DON'T THINK WHAT OTHERS WILL THINK ABOUT YOUR FANFIC BECAUSE HERE, AS LONG AS WE DON'T ABUSE OTHERS WE ARE FREE TO THINK AND WRITE WHATEVER WE WANT…HAHAHAHAHAHAHA…*beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*…(Author is again cracked up so we should take our leave now. Thank you for enduring this idiot's idioticity)