Hi. So, I've been obsessed with Grey's Anatomy for the last decade but I never really had a chance to write anything on this particular line of drama. You must know that I know nothing at all about being a Doctor but what I've learnt on this show. This is my attempt to re-write everything with a Faberry touch into it.
I want to give you a heads up to what you might find in here as well. All the medical trails are from the show since –like I said before- I know nothing about medicine but I'll try to focus more on the relationship than the medicine anyway. You also might find dialogues that are from the show as well but that won't always be the case.
That said and hoping that you like this new fic while I figure out what to do with the rest, I say, enjoy.
…
New Beginnings
This town is not so bad after all. I've always wanted to visit here but I've never had the chance to until recently, very recently. I've been only eight hours here but I've already accomplished more than I thought possible.
Seattle might not be the Capital of the World but it can surely be my home from now on.
"A scotch, please" the bartender smiles friendly before popping a glass with ice out of nowhere and handing me my ordered drink and I immediately like him. I have a thing for efficient people.
"New in town?" he asks with a deep voice and a knowing nod of his shaved head.
"I got here this morning"
"Then you chose the right place for your first drink" I eye the liquor suspiciously and he laughs a loud contagious laugh. I quirk my lips in amusement.
"I'll be the judge of that" he laughs harder and I finally sip my scotch. I can't pinpoint the brand but the taste is exquisite. "Not bad for a first drink"
"Told you. Welcome to town" he winks and saunters away to serve the next hopeless soul waiting to be served.
The bar is small, a cozy environment that invites you to get comfortable and wasted, surrounded by the usual customers. It feels like home in a very bohemian and lonely way. I down the scotch and a girl immediately serves me another one before doing the same with the rest of the people who is sitting at the bar.
It's probably not a good idea to be drinking before my first day in my new job, in a city that I don't know that well but I don't see myself going through this night without alcohol. I guess a part of me still finds it hard to believe everything that's happened in the last twenty four hours. I'd probably never believe it completely to be honest, another part of me just wants to forget and ignore that the last couple of years ever happened at all, and a much bigger part is just happy to be doing what I feel like doing for the first time in a long time.
"Is this seat taken?" I turn my head to the right where a smiling brunette girl is standing. She is beautiful and it's the first thing I notice about her but then of course there is the half flirty smile she flashes and her smiling eyes that just make me smile back.
"No, it's all yours" she throws her hair back her shoulder and smiles fuller at me. She orders a beer and downs half of it before her eyes find mine in amusement. She is really thirsty or dying to get wasted, I can't decide. Either way it makes me smile the way she drinks.
"I'm Rachel" she says, turning around and offering me her hand to shake, which I take.
"Quinn"
"Nice to meet you" she says as she takes her hand back and lifts her almost empty bottle in the air. The girl from before comes closer and Rachel orders a second beer before her eyes find mine again. "What are you having?"
She orders me another scotch and internally I laugh at this girl's attitude. She amuses me in a way that no one has in a long time. She looks younger than me, freer and more alive, and I become instantly attracted to her. I wasn't looking for anything like this but I won't shut out any possibilities. I'm starting again and if this is the way of faith to give me a clean slate then I'll take it.
Two hours later I invite her back to my room in a nearby hotel and she accepts to come along. The way her mood shifts once we're behind closed doors endears me to her greatly and when I kiss her for the first time I can practically feel the air leaving her body. This is something she's not used to. She's shy and nervous but I don't let it affect me because she still wants this and her hands pull me closer every time I pull back showing me how much. My head spins each time that her tongue licks a new inch of my skin and I barely manage to stay conscious after the first orgasm. She is in no better state but we both still manage to go again and again, and even when we're almost passed out from exhaustion we find the strength to go one last time.
…
I wake up to the sound of my alarm and reach out blindly to the nightstand on my right to turn off my phone. It's five fifteen and a woman lays naked snuggled next to my side. The last thing I remember is her body sliding deliciously on top of mine. Reaching out I move the hair from her face and watch her sleep peacefully for a few seconds.
She truly is beautiful and she could mean a new beginning that I'm willing to take.
I get out of the bed and head into the shower. I still can't wrap my mind around everything that's happened and I don't want to think about it anymore so I push it to the back of my head and get out to find Rachel fully dressed and frantically looking for her other shoe under the bed.
"Good morning" I greet and she barely acknowledges me by popping her head from under the bed and a moment later she comes out with both shoes in her hands looking triumphal.
"Got'em!" she announces. "I have to run, I'm already late"
"Late for what?" I ask, amused by her attitude once again.
"First day at work. If they notice I'm not there yet I might get kicked out and I can't get kicked out in my first day" I smile despise the sinking feeling in my chest and stomach at remembering once again why I'm here.
"Want to grab some breakfast before you go?"
"I can't" she smiles apologetically and finally snaps both shoes into her gorgeous tiny feet.
"Lunch?"
"I can't" she flies me the same sad smile.
"Dinner?" now I'm playing and she laughs. I get it if she doesn't want to see me again, this can be a one night stand, I'd be okay with that.
"I'm sorry. I don't know when I'm gonna be free and I really have to go now"
"It's alright" I calmly let her know, glad that at least I came out of the shower dressed in jeans and a shirt. "Last night was fun"
"Really fun" she smiles knowingly and then she's kissing my cheek. "Good bye…" she trails off and I realize that she's forgotten my name.
"Quinn" I smile even though that's the last thing I want to do right now.
"Right" she says loudly. "Good bye, Quinn"
"Good bye, Rachel."
With the sinking feeling of knowing that a girl had forgotten my name after we had had sex the entire previous night I go to work.
I stand outside of my new workplace for a few seconds, if only to admire the view. Well, hello Seattle Grace Hospital.
The building is magnificent, the colors soothing but I don't linger long to admire any of it as I walk right inside the front doors. I spot Doctor Thomas speaking to a group of nervous kids but as soon as he sees me he excuses himself and comes to meet me.
"Doctor Fabray" he shakes my hand. "I was afraid you might have gone back to the big apple" he laughs.
"Why would I do that?" I follow him to the elevator, passing a nurse station and the general reception area. It seems to be a busy day.
"Whatever reason brought you to us" he turns to face me with a sincere and grateful smile flashing. "We are very happy to have you here."
"I'm very happy to be here, sir. Thank you."
He squeezes my shoulder, I can tell he wants to say more, probably ask a few personal questions for whatever reason but he refrains from it and we're off the elevator and walking down a long corridor that has an extraordinary view of the City limits to a side. I could like this view. I could like everything about this place.
"The ORs are down to the right, oxygen room, administrative area" he gives me a fast tour of the floor, although I'll have to wander around a lot by myself to get comfortable. And soon enough he's opening the door to his office where a middle age woman smiles kindly from the center of the room, she holds a folder close to her chest and reading glasses on top of her red head.
"Good morning. Doctor Fabray"
"Good morning" I shake her offered hand.
"This is Natasha, my right hand around this hospital" Dr. Thomas says from behind his desk.
"The reason you're still sane I'd say" she teases him.
"Nice to meet you Natasha" I smile at her and she winks back. I already love the working environment here. The chief doesn't have a stick up his ass and his right hand doesn't seem to believe she is the boss of him. Improvement right there.
"The pleasure is mine, Dr."
We go over the extends of my contract one final time before I sign it and Dr. Thomas shakes my hand one last time before Natasha shows me the way to the lockers and assigns me one before giving me my brand new pager.
I quickly get changed and then, I'm on my way.
It's easy to forget about what I left behind a few days ago once I start working. There is no time to think about personal bullshit when you're trying to save lives and having your heart broken doesn't compare to having a malfunctioning heart inside of someone's chest that desperately needs your attention.
Today there is a newborn that's having problems with breathing and the intern I get running his labs turns sadder by the second as we both read the results. His lungs are too small to survive a surgery and his heart beat gets weaker by the hour. The boy is only a week old and he hasn't left the hospital since he was born and now, he never will.
"So what do we do now?" the intern asks me.
"What's your name Doctor?"
"Rose, Marley Rose" she quickly answers but the sad look in her eyes remains. I've seen interns like her come and go far too quickly in New York. You can't get attached to patients, especially not when their odds for survival are minimal. It sounds heartless and cold, but can you imagine what it would be like if we hung up to every single one of the patients that we can't save?
"Doctor Rose, we have to tell Jacob's mother that he's not going to make it through the night"
"But can't you operate? I've heard you're one of the best in the country" I smile softly at her and place Jacob's chart down. I don't like teaching, I don't like to tell these kids that they can't feel like this but I have to.
"Dr. Rose. You saw the results, you know that this baby is going to have a few painful last hours if we wake him up. His lungs are too small and his heart too deteriorated. Now, do you want to tell his mother to come and be with her child for his last few hours in peace or do you want to submit him to an operation that won't be successful or professionally advised?"
Dr. Rose stares at me with down casted eyes and nods her head twice. When she speaks her voice sounds broken. "Do you want me to tell the mother?"
"No, I'll do it."
For a first day she's handling it alright. On my first day of my internship I saw several colleagues cry, a girl I met passed out when a patient's hand fell from his arm and I threw up my lunch after I scrubbed in to watch my first surgery from up close.
I'd thought I knew it all. We all practice before we become interns, we all practice as much as we can but nothing compares to seeing actual people dying around you every day.
It's never easy to deliver bad news and personally I've never come around to work out a particular way to avoid heartbreak each time. But this is my job, this is my life and this is what I love to do, deliver bad news it's just an occupational hazard and something that needs to be done. Call it whatever you want.
As expected Mrs. Johnson starts sobbing as soon as I tell her what I found out. She hasn't been discharged yet and her room is filled with blue balloons and other gifts from friends and family. Her husband holds her but she's beyond herself and I hate to admit it but this isn't the worst reaction I've witness of a parent losing a child till this moment.
I leave the room. Dr. Rose is in charge of calling the baby's death when the time comes.
"Dr. Fabray?"
"Yeah?" a short angry looking Doctor is staring at me and for some reason I find her extremely adorable that her hard demeanor doesn't affect me at all.
"I need a consult, do you think you can accompany me?"
"Of course. Talk to me" I take the chart from her hands as she eyes me from head to toe. I chuckle at her lack of tact but don't comment on it. She doesn't seem like the kind of woman one would want to mess with.
"Thirty eight year old woman who thought it would be a great idea to eat fifty hot-dogs with mayo in every single one of them" I shiver involuntarily as I check her labs and then I wonder to myself, how can people care so little for their health?
"Cholesterol is high, sugar off the charts. This woman is a diabetic patient and she ate fifty hot dogs? Fifty? How could she…?"
"That's right" the Doctor confirms as she opens the room just in time to see the patient throw up all over the floor. Two interns that have been following the Doctor by my side down the hallway look like they're a second or two from throwing up themselves and I almost chuckle at the sight.
With time one learns to control the effect vomit has on most people, with time one sees all the bodily fluids we have on the inside and vomit is not the worst. I don't even find it gross anymore. It's just another symptom that can help save a life and as a Doctor I've learnt to be alert to all the symptoms that I can see.
"I'm Doctor Jones" the Doctor finally tells me her name and I smile back. "Welcome to town" she whispers as we both step aside.
"Mrs. Carl" I enter the room as two nurses hurry the clean up the mess and one last intern comes running with a cup of coffee in her hands.
Her eyes meet mine and I almost voice her name. Rachel stares at me with wide eyes as Dr. Jones takes the coffee from her hands and passes it to a man sitting on the corner of the room. I take a second look at Rachel and then I smile.
This could definitely be a new beginning.
"I told her not to eat the hot dogs. It was a bad idea. I told her but she didn't listen" the man informs me.
"I'm Doctor Fabray" I shake his hand.
"She didn't listen" he repeats.
"It's okay, we're going to find the way to clear the mess, alright. No worries"
"You look young" Mrs. Carl says from the bed and I smile at her.
"And I don't go eating more than one hot dog per week" I joke and luckily she laughs with the interns. Rachel isn't laughing though, in fact she is starting to look a little pale.
After explaining Mr. and Mrs. Carl that coronary arteries are very tricky to mess with they accept to have the surgery and I leave the room feeling lighter than I did before.
"Lopez, get me the test results for Mr. Brown" Dr. Lopez runs down the hall, eager to take directions from Dr. Jones and I can already tell she's the kind of girl that would do anything to get into an OR. "Puckerman, give a hand to Anderson in the ER" the shaved boy winks at her before taking off. I patiently wait for Dr. Jones to give direction to two more of her interns before she calls her name. "Berry" Rachel looks up.
"Dr. Jones, I'm in need of an extra pain of hands today. Can I burrow one of your interns?" Dr. Jones looks me over before turning.
"Dr. Berry, you're with Dr. Fabray today" she finally says before leaving us. Rachel immediately gives me a look that I find incredibly endearing and instead of her following me I'm the one following her down the hall. Looking both ways and making sure no one is looking I grab her hand and pull her into the locker room which is the closest to us.
"Dr. Fabray, we can't do this" she rushes in a harsh whisper.
"We can't do what? And it's Quinn" I smile at her and I watch as she makes a show of stomping her feet on the ground before pacing back and forth three times before coming to stand in front of me again.
"We can't…"
"You are adorable" I cut her off and her eyes widen before pointing a finger to my chest.
"You can't be my boss" she frowns.
"I'm just Quinn" I shrug.
"And I'm no longer your one night stand. I'm your intern! We should be professionals about this"
"Who said you were a one night stand?" her eyes widen comically and then she gets to study my smiling and calm face with scrutiny.
"We should forget last night ever happened" she reasons and I have to say that her morals impress me and for whatever reason I want to get to know her better.
"And forget all the things we did?" her mouths opens in shock and I don't have to say that I'm enjoying this too much. "I'd rather not. Now that we both know we'll be seeing a lot of each other, how about that lunch date?"
"No!" she shrieks and then pulls up her hair in a tight pony before taking deep breaths and then her big chocolate eyes find mine. "I can't go out with you because I can't be that intern"
"What intern?"
"The intern that's sleeping with her attending"
"Good things could come to the intern that's sleeping with the attending" I reason back and she frowns before growling –actually growling- under her breath but even as she does it I can see the smile on her lips that tells me that she is enjoying this as much as I am.
"I can't" she says looking apologetic.
"But you will."
I open the door and start down the hall, hurried footsteps behind me tell me that she's following close and before I enter my patient's room I look back at her again. She smiles despise herself.
"Dr. Berry" I call out loud to let her know that she won't be that intern, I won't let her become that intern and she smiles bashfully before looking up.
"Yes, Dr. Fabray"
"There are some labs I need as soon as they're ready. Please wait for them and bring them to me"
"Yes, Dr."
I watch her go but she doesn't look back. Perhaps I won't hate teaching so much this year, perhaps I'll even enjoy it.
I finally turn the handle and let Mr. Henry know that his appendectomy will be performed in a few hours.
When I walk out of his room I'm still having problems believing that Rachel is an intern in the hospital I started to work today, it's unreal but a nice surprise nonetheless. I understand her point of why I should stay away and keep things professional. The competition is insane between interns and everything goes down to whom is liked best by the attending Doctors and their natural ability to learn of course. But no one wants to be on the receiving end of jealousy, ever.
She finds me in the nurse station changing my pager's battery. "Here are the labs you ordered Dr. Fabray."
"Thank you, Dr. Berry."
As I study the results in my hands I sent Rachel off to lunch. Mr. Henry is all good to go under the scalpel and I finally sit down with a cup of coffee and a pen in my hands. If there is one thing I don't like about being a surgeon that is the paper work. Everything needs to be filed for future references and legal affairs. It's an annoying and very important necessity.
The Operation board shows a full and busy day and I realize that this will be an incredible first day before I go to the cafeteria to look for my intern.
I spot her laughing in a table with three other interns whose names I don't know yet.
"Good afternoon" I greet them and it's almost amusing the way all of them sit up straight and chew faster to greet back. What can I say? I enjoy the power that comes with position, although I'm opposed to abuse it in any way.
"Dr. Fabray, can we help you?" Dr. Lopez asks and I remember her name because it reminds me of my once best friend. She is too eager but this is the right profession for her I must say. Rachel is avoiding looking at me at all costs and I also find that endearing.
"I'm sure you're all aware that at the first day one of the interns is chosen to assist on a minor surgery for the first time"
"One of us gets to scrub in?" Lopes interrupts me a little too enthusiastic.
"Yes, one of you do" the suspense kills them as I stop talking and wait until Rachel finally looks up. "Dr. Berry, you can prepare Mr. Henry for surgery and after that I'll meet you in the OR."
I walk away but not before seeing her eyes widen one last time.
Dating an attending can be a terrible idea but it can also help a great deal. In Rachel's case it can be the latest. I have a lot to teach and she has a lot to learn if she's interested and smart, which I think she really is.
Come what may, I find her in the scrub room washing her hands.
"You shouldn't have done that" she shakes her head.
"What?" I smile and pour sob.
"You don't even know me, I could be a terrible Doctor" she has a point.
"Are you?" she immediately frowns and gasps in indignation.
"I am certainly not" she denies.
"Well then, come on in."
As expected, the majority of the interns are watching form the gallery. It's an old tradition to watch the first one to hold a scalpel and then it comes the eternal glory or eternal mockery for the chosen one.
Rachel was right, I don't know what kind of Doctor she is but I intend to find that out right now.
"Ladies and gentleman" I call the attention of my team for the day. I meet each pair of eyes in the room and smile at them. "Let's hit the road."
To my right Rachel is mumbling something under her breath nonstop.
"Dr. Berry, this is where you go in." Her eyes meet mine, beautiful and full with fear but when she speaks her voice doesn't falter.
"Scalpel" she asks and I watch as she takes it before the entire gallery comes to life and the interns watching clap their hands as Rachel takes the scalpel in her hands. I can still remember the first time I held one in a real OR and in a way I'm glad to be present for Rachel's first time. This is something that she'll never forget and now because of her, neither will I.
"Put pressure on it. Dig in with care" she nods her head at my direction and her incision ends up being flawless. I watch with an impressed smile as she requests for the picks ups and the clamp. She's in and the peritoneum is open for surgery.
"What do you do next?" I ask softly.
"Scalpel" she asks again and then I watch as she removes the appendix successfully. An incredible tactic, incredible hands.
"The appendix is out" she announces and I don't have to see her face to know that she's smiling, although her eyes are very expressive as she looks at me.
"Excellent work, Dr. Berry"
"Thank you."
"What comes next, Dr. Berry?" I clear my throat to remove the thundering feeling her eyes have provoke.
"Invert the stump into the cecum. Pull up on the per strings" she answers quickly.
"Exactly, but you have to be careful to do it simultaneously and to not break the…" blood starts pooling quickly, her eyes wide in horror.
"Focus, Dr. Berry" I speak comfortably, calmly. "You ripped the cecum. How do you proceed now?" she shakes her head, searching for an answer as the blood pools quickly.
"I…um…"
"Think, Dr. Berry"
"Bps dropping" a Doctor announces and Rachel's eyes finally look up to meet mine again. I nod at her and watch in amazement as she gains focus back.
"Suction" she orders and moves fast.
"What else do you do?" I focus on her work and what she's doing but she's alert as well.
"I have to dig for the per strings before she bleeds out. Clamp."
They hand her the clamp quickly as the heart monitor starts to beat rapidly but as soon as it comes, it goes and Rachel has controlled the bleeding and tied up the per strings.
"Excellent" I smile one last time before I close Mr. Henry myself with Rachel right by my side. I can feel her eyes on my hands until I sew the last stitch.
"Thank you very much everyone. We've arrived successfully."
After washing up I find Rachel leaning outside of the door and the smile on her face is blinding. It warms me from within and I don't know why but I want to find out.
"You aren't terrible" I tell her and she laughs softly, her cheeks tainting red at the hidden compliment.
"I have a great teacher" she smiles and then she remembers that she shouldn't be smiling at me and frowns instead. I laugh, amused by her attitude.
"About that lunch?" I prompt.
"It's not happening" she starts walking backwards and smiles wider. "Stop harassing me" she teases.
"You love it"
"You wish"
"I do" I smile charmingly and she huffs before looking over her shoulder to make sure that she's not about to run into someone or fall backwards perhaps.
"You are incorrigible."
As she smiles, enjoying our little banter I realize that I actually love the way she does it and I chose to keep trying until she gives me a real chance, no matter what the consequences might be for me.
"I'll see you around, Dr. Berry" she nods, probably understanding that this isn't me letting go but just letting it go for now.
"I'll see you around, Dr. Fabray."
….
I hope you enjoyed. Any thoughts will be appreciated.