DISCALIMER: I don't own CSI Miami and i don't make any money from it

The Absinth look

The Absinth look!

Calleigh was sitting at home in her apartment sadly looking at a bottle of absinth she had bought years ago but never touched.

Before she had went home from work that day she had removed her name from the message board. After watching Hagen kill himself in front of her in her lab, and then later her brain mass had dripped down on h lab coat it was just to much. She had decided never to go back, it would just be to hard. She removed the cork and put the bottle to her mouth and took a sip. It tasted a little bit different than she expected, but not bad at all.

Horatio that had just waved his family away had just parked the car and walked into the lab. On his way he had heard the terrible news and he wanted to check on Calleigh, so he went down to her firearms lab, but he couldn't find her anywhere.

Then he saw her name was removed from the message board, it had never happened before.

"This is not good, not good at all" he thought and run upstairs.

Calleigh looked at the three pictures at her table. The first on was of Speddle. A tear run down her check. "Dear Speddle, you were one of my best friends, no actually you were more than that. I knew how you forgot to clean your gun the first time, so why didn't I check your gun more often so I could have prevented it from ever happen. It was all my fault, I hope you can forgive me since I will see you again soon" she thought.

The second picture was of John. "My dear John, why didn't you come to me sooner, why didn't you tell me what was really wrong, why did you have to take the easy way out. How could you do that to me" she thought.

She took up the last picture it was of Horatio. Then she put it back on the table, let the tears come and put the bottle back to her mouth and continued to drink. By now she didn't even feel the taste.

Horatio had reached the reception and asked Paula "Do you know where Calleigh went?"

"No sir, but she left this for you, she said it was important" said Paula and handed him an envelope.

Horatio tore it open, inside it was a note that said: Horatio. Even if I love this job, it is just to much. I just feel so sad and alone. I hope you can forgive me for what I'm about to do. BG.

"Oh shit" Horatio said and run out to his hummer in a hurry. He couldn't believe that his favorite girl was going to commit suicide. He steeped hard on the gas and only hoped he would get there in time.

Horatio knocked on the door, but got no answer, and figured the only way to get in was to run down the door and so he did. He found Calleigh on the floor in front of the coach. Her eyes closed and her long blond hair surrounding her head. In her right hand was a bottle of absinth, but no most of what was left was on the floor. Horatio kneeled down beside her to check her pulse, it was weak, but she was still alive.

Horatio sighed relived and called an ambulance. Then he stroke her face gently and said: Calleigh, angel, please don't die, I don't know how I would survive it since I love you so much.

Then a single tear fell from his eve down on her check and her eyes slowly opened. She looked into his blue eyes and saw the concerned look on his face and understood what she had done was the biggest mistake she'd ever made and could have cost her her life and she started to cry. How could she ever have wanted to leave this wonderful man that cared so much about her.

Horatio looked at her and saw the sorrow and regret in her eyes. He stroke her hair gently again and said: My angel please don't cry, since I hate to see you sad. Everything is going to be ok I promise. I'm here for you now, and I'm not going anywhere sweetheart.

Then the paramedics came through the door and took her to the hospital.

An hour later Calleigh wake up in the hospital bed, still a bit under the influence of the absinth so she didn't see totally clear or think that clearly either. She almost felt like she had on beer goggles. She let her eyes glide slowly around the room to try to get her mind focused on what she was seeing. Then she saw Horatio sitting on a chair next to her. His eyes looked something between sad, worried and tired. His face was grimy, so she figured he must have been crying. She instantly felt sorry for him. He was looking down in the ground an looked lost in his own thought.

"Horatio" Calleigh said a bit tired, but could not recognize her own voice.

Horatio looked at her, she looked a bit tired and disorientated, so he asked: Calleigh, sweetheart are you ok?

"Dunno, depends on how you look at it I guess" She replied realizing she was getting her normal voice back.

"Calleigh you really scared me, I really thought I was going to loose you for good. What if I hadn't gotten your note in time? Why did you do that" he asked.

Calleigh could hear by his voice how scared and worried he was.

Her own voice was shaking when she replied: If you hadn't gotten there in time I would be with Speddle and John right now. I really miss him Horatio, it was all my fault, I should've checked his gun, the he would still be alive. And John I shouldn't have been so harsh with him. I feel so guilty.

Horatio felt sorry for her, she sounded and looked so unbelievably sad, so he couldn't help him self. He got up, sat down on the side of her bed, put his arms around her and held her closely to comfort her as the way he did when Speddle died.

Then he said: Sweetheart, listen to me, noon of those things was your fault. And you couldn't have done anything to prevent them. And if it helps I also blame my self when it comes to Speddle. Just promise me you won't do anything like this again. You really scared me.

Calleigh was overwhelmed by his action and said: I won't but Horatio I don't think I can go back there for a while.

"Don't worry about it, just go back when you are ready ok" he said softly still holding her.

"I don't think I ever can" she said sadly and released her self from him.

He smiled kindly at her and said: Of course you will, it's in your nature. You can't keep your self away for to long.

"How can you be so sure?" she asked. She hoped desperately that he was right, because right now she didn't feel like getting anywhere near the lab.

"I'm sure bulletgirl" Horatio said and kissed her softly on the check. She didn't know if it was the rest of the absinth or something else, but she bent forward and kissed him. He returned the kiss. Her lips were so soft.

Then Horatio broke away and Calleigh blushed and smiled shyly. She was so cute.

"I'm glad to see you got your beautiful smile back" Horatio said and smiled at her.

Calleigh blushed again and said: What made you become so sweet all of a sudden?

"I dunno, it must be you, my angel" He said and kissed her soft lips again.

Once again she blushed and whispered in his ear "I love you handsome".

"I know, and I love you to Calleigh, I always have and I always will" he said and kissed her lips once more. She tasted delicious. The broke free and she yawned.

"Are you tired? I can leave so you can get some sleep" he said concerned.

"A bit, but if you don't mind I'd really like you to stay, so I won't feel so alone when I wake up" she said and looked at him with her green eyes.

"Then I'll stay, just go to sleep beautiful" he said.

Calleigh closed her eyes and was soon in another world. Horatio sat watching, glad he had gotten to her in time.

Three mounts later.

Calleigh had just fired a gun and smiled pleased with her results.

Horatio walked up beside her and said: I told you so. Felt good, didn't it?

"I know. It felt really good, I can't believe I stayed away for so long. I really love this place, it's my home" she said and smiled at him.

"I know beautiful. I'm so home you're back at the gun range" Horatio said and kissed her softly.

So am I handsome, but now I gotta work, see ya later" Calleigh asked.

"Always. I leave you to the love of your life them" he chuckled and left her.

Calleigh fired the gun and smiled happily, it felt so good. "I'm finally home again, and about time to" she thought and went to compare the bullets.