Who am I?
Am I just what people see me to be? This giggling, smile, happy front. Or am I the person who hides the behind a shield I made? Is there even a shield, in which for me to hide behind? Have I turned into the person, people just believe me to be?
I don't know.
I smile when I need to. I laugh when I need to. But is that me, or is that who I pretend to be? I almost wish I knew. But at the same time, I'm glad I don't. I fear what I'll find if I look behind the shield. I'm scared of the fearful snivelling child I'll found if I look. Because I know, deep-down inside, that that's what I'll find if I look. Or maybe I won't and that's what I fear most, that I'll find nothing. Maybe I am nothing, maybe I feel nothing, but just think otherwise. Because I know that I'll be seen as even more of a freak if I walk around with a blank look.
I don't know.
But in the mean time I'll smile blankly, and cry without a sound. When I'm alone in my room.