A/n: I had a few funny conversations going in my head so I decided to kidnap the characters of Junjou Romantica to make them happen. Enjoy!
Warning: Sorry but there's going to be A LOT of inappropriate stuff being said here so if you're under the age limit, then...please turn back now.
Misaki: Wait...aren't you under-aged as well?
Me: Shush, Misaki. You speak of strange things.
Misaki: Like the truth?
Me: Shush!
Usagi-san: Why are we here again?
Me: To satisfy my craving for some SEXY HOT MANSEX!
Usagi-san and Misaki back away slowly.
Me: What?
Usagi-san:...
Misaki:...
Me: What?!
Usagi-san:...
Misaki:...
Me: GODDAMMIT! JUST SPIT IT OUT ALREADY!
Misaki: Shojen12 does not own Junjou Romantica or anything related to it.
I smack my forehead and faint.
Usagi-san: I think that went pretty well.
Misaki smacks his forehead as well.
Misaki: Why are we here again?
Me: Misaki, weren't you paying attention earlier?
Misaki: Unfortunately yes.
Usagi-san: Shojen, tell us why we are here otherwise we'll leave.
Me:...Fine. (takes a deep breath) Iwantedtoarandomconversionse rieswithasmanyanimeseriesIkn owstartingwithJunjouRomantic a.
Misaki: Slow down. Try again.
Me: I wanted to a random conversion series with as many anime series I know starting with Junjou Romantica.
Usagi-san: Oh, why didn't you say so? (pulls out pad and pen)
Misaki: Usagi-san, what are you doing?
Usagi-san: Taking notes for my next Junai novel.
Misaki: What makes you think-(remembers earlier conversation) SHOJEN!
Me: Yes?
Misaki: DON'T GIVE HIM ANY IDEAS!
Me(innocently): I don't have the slightest clue on what you're talking about.
Misaki: Aye aye aye.
Me: Oh that poor kid in Mexico.
Usagi-san and Misaki: Huh?
Me: Yeah didn't you hear about that kid in Mexico born with three eyes- aye aye aye.
Usagi-san and Misaki face-palm.
Hiro-san: Oy, Shoj. Cut the crap and let us go.
Nowaki: Hiro-san, be nice to her.
Hiro-san(scoffs): Why should I?
Me: Oh, you know. You wouldn't want a certain tape floating around online for us fangirls to see now do you? (holds up tape)
Hiro-san: Eep! ...WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?!
He turns to Miyagi.
Hiro-san: YOU! YOU GAVE IT HER DIDN'T YOU?!
Miyagi(holds up hands in defense): It wasn't me. Besides the library doesn't have cameras.
Hiro-san: Aha! So the tape's fake!
Me: No. I installed a hidden camera in the library and recorded the whole thing. See.
I play the tape.
Usagi-san(while taking notes): Thank you Shojen for the material for my next Junai Egoist novel.
Me: No problem. Just make sure I get dibs on a copy when it comes out, kay?
Usag-san: Deal.
We shake on it.
Misaki(major blush on his face): Sssshojen, w-w-hy are you p-playing this?!
Me: To prove the tape's legit. Why? Is it giving you a hard-on?
Misaki: N-NO!
Hiro-san: SHOJENNNN! TURN IT OFF RIGHT NOW!
Me: Fine.
I turn it off.
Hiro-san: Now have it over.
I reluctantly, RELUCTANTLY, hand it over.
Me: Here. Now go deal with your "problem."
Hiro-san: I don't have a-(realizes I wasn't talking to him)
He turns to Nowaki and looks down.
Hiro-san(while shaking him): NOWAKI YOU BAKA! THIS ISN'T THE TIME TO BEING HAVING A HARD-ON!
Nowaki(smiling): I'm sorry Hiro-san. Watching the video made me want you.
Hiro-san: Well too bad. You're just gonna have to wait.
Me: Or you guys can use my basement.
Everyone: Huh?
Me: Yeah, I had it remodeled just for this story.
Nowaki: Show me where it is please.
Me: It's right across the hall, the last door to your left.
Nowaki: Thank you.
He grabs Hiro-san's hand and half guides, half drags him there.
Me: Don't worry the walls are soundproof. So go as loud as you want.
Hiro-san: SHOJEN!
They leave the room.
Me(thoughts): Now for the real fun.
I go over to my computer and turn on the cameras in the basement.
The computer shows Nowaki and Hiro-san in the basement.
Misaki: Shojen, what are you doing?
Me: Oh, nothing. (giggles)
Misaki comes over and tries to look at my computer screen.
I close the laptop.
Misaki: Shojen, show me.
Me: No.
He grabs the laptop.
He opens it.
Misaki: What is this shit?!
Me: It's called video feed via cameras in the basement.
Usagi-san, Misaki and Miyagi look at me with surprised faces.
Usagi-san starts taking notes.
Misaki:USAGI-SAN! DON'T TAKE NOTES! IT ISN'T RIGHT!
Misaki turns to me.
Misaki: WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU RECORDING THIS SHIT?!
Me: Because I love the Egoist couple and this makes up for the tape Hiro-san took from me.
Misaki: Can't you just watch the episode online?
Me: Yes, but Japanese law prohibits showing unmarried couple having sex on TV, hence the "censors". We fans only get a taste of it, unlike the manga. However, with the tape I had, I got the full enchilada. Unfortunately Hiro-san confiscated the tape. So now I'm replacing it.
Misaki: you're just as bad as Usagi-san.
Me: Why thank you!
Misaki face-palms.
Me: Now, if you'll excuse me, the fun part is starting.
I grab my laptop bavk from Misaki and watch the screen.
Screen Hiro-san: Ah...ah...y-yes...right there...fuck...yes...fuck me...Nowaki.
Me(grabs tissue): This is even better than I've imagined!
I continue watching the screen.
Screen Nowaki: Ah...H-Hiro-san...Oooh...you're so tight...
Screen Hiro-san: Nowaki...I-I'm c-coming...
Screen Nowaki: Same here, Hiro-san.
Screen Hiro-san: NOWAKI!
Screen Nowaki: HIRO-SAN!
Me(nosebleed): YES! THIS IS EVEN BETTER THAN THE ACTUAL EPISODE!
Usagi-san(puts down pen and pad): Indeed.
Nowaki and Hiro-san enter the room.
I save the video and close my laptop.
Me: So, how'd it go?
Nowaki: Excellent.
Hiro-san: NOWAKI!
Me: I'll bet.
Hiro-san: Huh?
Me: Nothing.
Misaki: When are you ending this madness?!
Me: Now.
Misaki: Phew.
Me: In the next episode of-
Misaki: What?! I thought you ending the madness?!
Me: I meant the chapter.
Misaki: No!
Me: Oh c'mon Misaki. This is nothing, I mean NOTHING, compared to my Death Note one.(remembers all the Light bashing) Ah, good times, good times.
Me(clears throat): ON THE NEXT OURAN!...No I'm joking. But I promise the next chapter will be a BLAST!
Me: Shinobu, will you do the honors?
Shinobu(reads from card): Please review at the bottom...and no there will be no threat against the Junjou cast. Why do you have that written on the card.
Me:...No reason...Bye!
