Hey. I know I have my newest NaLu, Fueling the Fire, going right now, as well as my GaLe multichaptered fic Blood and Iron, but I couldn't help it. I finally, finally got the idea for the Gruvia fic I've been desperately planning for ages.
So, here goes my fourth attempt at beginning Perpetual Rain.
Enjoy!
*Note*: please read the author's note at the bottom. Thank you!
Juvia Loxar had always been plagued by the rain. She didn't know why and after a while she didn't care to ask because no one knew. The hard, undeniable truth was that the rain simply was. It poured down upon her, drenching her clothes if she didn't carry an umbrella or a parasol. Her precious teru teru bozu doll was the only one that remained after everyone ran from the rain.
Loneliness was a burden of its own kind, and she knew it well. Juvia couldn't escape it because it was everywhere the rain fell. And when the rain fell, she was always in the middle. The wish for friends, though always secretly remaining in her heart, faded from her lips.
The rain was her only comfort…but it was no longer any comfort at all.
Juvia couldn't remember when the rain stopped being a comfort to her. She knew it had been a close companion that she didn't mind when she was younger. It was like a reflection of her loneliness, and she kind of liked that everyone could see it. Maybe, if they could see it, people would come to try to pull her out of the rain and make friends with her. But the days passed and turned to weeks, the weeks to months, and the months turned to long, painful years of being alone.
She didn't want to be alone.
It took a long time for the water mage to realize that she didn't want to be alone anymore. Her longtime friend, the rain, had become a ceaseless enemy—an enemy from which there could be no escape. Her teru teru bozu was becoming old and worn, frayed from how often the rain had drenched it. The weight of the water tore at Juvia, and she wanted an escape. She wanted someone to come find her and drag her from her loneliness.
Maybe she didn't know it, but she had wanted a guild all along.
When Phantom Lord took her on, and when she became a member of Element Four, she thought she'd finally found her home. Even if some of the jobs they took on didn't appeal to her too much, she did them anyway. They helped her to fit in and for that there was no complaint on her behalf.
It was there that she met Gajeel.
He was gruff, crude, rude, but in his own way he was gentle and kind. The red-eyed Gajeel Redfox became the first friend that Juva Loxar had made since before she could remember.
Is this what happiness feels like? She wondered. When she was punished for making a mistake on a job, harshly, she still wondered, this is the place that makes Juvia happiest, right? Juvia is truly happy here, for the first time, so she can't complain about this. It hurts…but otherwise Juvia is happy. She is.
A year in Phantom Lord and she finally had to stop denying it—the only thing here that made her happy was her friendship with Gajeel. He was the only one she could talk to. The other members of Element Four weren't her cup of tea. Everyone in the guild was far crueler than Juvia was, even Gajeel. They talked casually about things like killing the bandits on their last job. They claimed it was okay because the job called for 'dealing with them' or 'kill or capture'. Human life didn't seem to matter as much to them as it did to Juvia, who thought it was precious.
She, who was always alone, wanted gentle, caring human contact. She couldn't get that here.
Forever alone in her thoughts and opinions, the water mage continued her days of solitude. Gajeel could take a slight edge off of the loneliness, but somewhere along the lines it stopped being quite as comforting. He was still her best friend, but when she heard what he'd done to that one mage team from Fairy Tail, she was embarrassed to be his friend.
She was ashamed of herself when she assisted in the capture of Lucy Heartfilia.
Juvia wasn't one of the main people in charge of watching Lucy after they'd taken her to the Phantom Lord base. She and her fellow Element Four members went and patrolled in order to prevent anyone from this Fairy Tail guild entering to try to save the girl. Despite this, she heard stories. Her only friend injured the blonde heiress, and again the water mage felt ashamed of this guild. She knew Gajeel could show a different side, so why didn't he?
The conclusion formed shortly: Phantom Lord was to blame.
If she spent any more time here, would Juvia become so cold and insensitive as well? Was there anywhere that she could go, and take Gajeel with her, that would accept them and help them change back to what they once were? And more than that…could she even go back?
The changes were happening; Juvia could feel them. Already the thought of being harshly beaten for messing up on a job was almost normal—no, it was normal—how else was one to be punished for botching the job? The idea of kidnapping people for the job wasn't so bad anymore…hadn't she done just that when helping to take Lucy Heartfilia captive from Fairy Tail? And more than all of that…what did anyone need friends for? She'd always been alone, and even here in Phantom Lord she remained alone. Did she really need anyone else? She'd made it this far on her own, so what was the rest of her miserable life?
But no…Juvia could no longer accept it. She saw the Fairy Tail mages ready to fight to the death for Lucy and she wondered, Can I ever have something like that?
The rain fell harder than ever before.
And then she met him.
She didn't know what it was about him, but he was frantic and determined and when they encountered each other, she didn't know what to do at first. It became clear rather quickly that he was there to find Lucy, and she had to fight him for that. And then she felt nothing—the familiarity of fighting under Master Jose's orders had become routine to her, and she saw little wrong with it. But…the things that this ice mage said in the midst of their battle got her thinking.
Juvia Loxar of Element Four…she was defeated that day. In the fight but also in her mind. But this man…this Gray Fullbuster, of Fairy Tail…he'd helped her to see much more clearly.
She could see more clearly because the rain was gone.
What was it about this person, and the rest of Fairy Tail, that started to intrigue her after that loss? After Jose was severely punished and Phantom Lord was disbanded, she still wondered about that mysterious mage.
For a while, Juvia just wandered around, pondering her options for the future. Once again, she was all alone in the world, but for the first time she was without the rain. She could still feel the potential for the rain, right on the edge of her magic, but it held in check. The water mage wanted to know why, or how, it had happened…and she decided that the ice mage who had made it cease was the easiest place to start.
At first, it was just curiosity about the end of the rain that caused her to follow him. And then it was the easy camaraderie she saw that he had with the Salamander and many others of their guild.
Eventually, Juvia joined that guild. Fairy Tail became her home. And if only a few trusted her to start with, she soon felt welcome there. And when she started to feel welcome, she realized that there was another out there who would make Fairy Tail feel even more like home to her. She sought out Gajeel and pleaded with him to talk to the Master of Fairy Tail. He said he'd think about it but never gave any indication of his true plans.
Even so, Gajeel soon joined Fairy Tail and then it was home. His relationship with everyone was rocky at first, especially because of all he'd done to Levy and her team, but slowly it started to smooth out. Sure, they had come from a guild that had caused Fairy Tail so much pain, but now they were part of that guild. And something Juvia was realizing a little at a time was that Fairy Tail was very forgiving. Sometimes it took a little time, but one of the first people to soften towards Gajeel was the one he'd harmed the most: Levy McGarden.
The rain stayed away. Juvia could still feel it, just on the edge as if waiting to douse her again when she least expected it, but for now she was happy. And Juvia knew this was true happiness for the first time.
In the beginning, her love confessions to Gray were just a little joke, if that could be believed. She thought that would get her into the guild more easily—she was changed by love at first sight. It seemed like the kind of thing that half of these people would buy, and it seemed to work. Master Makarov had seen right through her, but that was to be expected. At least he'd accepted both she and Gajeel into their midst. But slowly…slowly those joking confessions started to hold some meaning for the water mage.
Juvia wasn't sure when it had happened…but it had. She was really falling for the ice mage that seemed unable to keep his clothes on for any reason.
And it didn't surprise her as much as she thought it should have.
Gray was the one who stopped the rain; she had reason to care for him because of that. But it was also the little things. He was brash and rude but just like Gajeel, he had those sides that redeemed him. His kindness, thoughtfulness, and the fierce protectiveness over what he cared about made her fall just a little more. And it was strange that she could feel so much for one person when she'd never had anyone to care about in that way before now…but Juvia wouldn't change that even if she could.
Falling for him happened a lot slower than she let on, but it still happened nonetheless. The act turned into the truth and Juvia didn't know why it had escalated nor did she care.
As long as she could be near Gray, there was nothing wrong.
When Gray was threatened by Meredy on Terou Island during the exams, Juvia was beyond fury. Her Gray, threatened by this little brat who claimed that Gray had done something to harm Ultear…? It wouldn't do.
Won't forgive…? Juvia remembered saying slowly, in as menacing a voice as she could possibly muster. That's my line.
The sensory link—if she hurt that Meredy girl, it would hurt Gray too. And if Meredy hurt Juvia, it would go to Gray too. Juvia was already in pain, so she knew that Gray must be too. There was simply nothing she could do. She'd have to hurt him to save him, but she didn't want to. He'd saved her, somehow, but here the rain came again, drenching them. She didn't know what it was that caused it—was she that furious or was it the terrible confusion she was in that brought it to be?
Her confusion was too much, and Juvia was outmatched.
He saved her once again.
Really, was there nothing Gray couldn't do? He'd saved her from Phantom Lord and herself all in one go, and now he was there, saving her life. Juvia wouldn't ever be able to pay back the debt she owed to him. And she fell a little more in love.
Time passed on—seven years before they knew it, trapped on Tenrou Island. And upon waking, nothing had changed with any of them. They were more beloved by the guild members they'd left behind because it would hurt to lose them all again…but they all still felt the same. Gajeel perhaps was a little softer on Levy now, and Juvia thought the story of him rescuing her was really sweet—though she wouldn't ever mention that to him.
And Juvia was still falling.
She no longer referred to Gray with any honorifics, two years after their return from Tenrou Island, and she'd slowed her confessions of love to him, but the nineteen year old woman still held firm. She started to believe that it really was love at first sight and she just hadn't realized it yet—why else would the rain have stopped? Or maybe it was because that was the moment when she first thought someone else cared about her.
But two years—technically nine—was a long time to wait, even for the most patient of women.
And so on nights like this, when the rain clouds covered the moon and the entire city was thrown into darkness penetrated only by the light coming from windows for from the magic streetlamps, her rain wouldn't be stopped either. Juvia had just woken from a dream full of her doubts and fears and remembrances of her solitude to find that she was soaked from head to toe and a small storm cloud roiled above her bed.
Juvia stared blankly up at it, then sighed and climbed out of bed. She walked to the bathroom and stepped into the tub to sit down. It would minimize the water damage to her new apartment, after all.
It was a long time to wait, she knew, and still Gray might never return her feelings. But Juvia wasn't willing to stop loving him—not yet. And she wasn't even sure she could if she tried.
The blue-haired water mage leaned her head back and sighed again, letting the water wash over her. Her light blue nightgown was already completely saturated and it wouldn't make any sense to change now that she was here. Her hair stuck to her cheeks and her neck, and her nightgown clung awkwardly in some places, but she wasn't upset. This didn't happen often, and it reminded her why she was happy to have joined Fairy Tail and met everyone in the first place. Especially Gray.
Fifteen minutes had passed but already the rain drew to an end and the water mage stretched a little. Sitting in the tub without the comforting warm bath water to soothe her muscles was rather uncomfortable, and if she didn't get into dry clothes soon and change her bedding, the entire room would smell musty in a few hours. So Juvia stood and stripped off her wet gown in the middle of the bathroom, then her undergarments, before grabbing a soft, fluffy towel from inside the cabinet and heading out into her room.
She could see the faint traces of dawn through her closed curtains, and she could still hear the steady pitter-patter of the rain outside, but that was okay. It didn't rain on her every day anymore, so a little bit of rain didn't hurt her feelings any.
It was the start of a new day.
One more day in the life of Juvia Loxar, a water mage once plagued by never-ending rain but now by her unrequited love…but she was happy.
So…it's a start, I guess. There's pretty much no dialogue which is why I'm cutting it off here. I wanted to get to at least 2500 words and I managed so that's going to be the first chapter. I actually had so many other attempts at a first chapter, and I'm considering editing one of them and making it a second or third chapter...we'll see.
PLEASE READ: I'm a college student, and I shouldn't have started this since I have my newest NaLu fic Fueling the Fire and my GaLe fic Blood and Iron both going right now…but I've wanted to write this for a long time. I have to warn you that updates may be very few and quite far between until at least May, and then I will have to get back into the writing spirit, which could take a few weeks.
Please be patient with me! Telling me to update soon does not help, all right?
Thanks so much for reading and I hope you liked the first chapter, even just a little.