So I found that there aren't basically any fics with Russell and Greg bonding an getting to know each other. I think that's sad. So I wrote this upon impulse. Hope you like it. I just kinda like the idea of Greg being vulnerable and Russell being there to comfort him. Kinda like a father figure cause he's the closest thing we see in the show since Grissom is gone.


A little bonding: a one-shot

D. B. Russell walked into the break room with only the intention of getting another cup of coffee. What he didn't expect was Greg. Greg was passed out on the couch. He was sprawled across both cushions, and his long lithe body hung off the armrests on both ends. He had deep circles under his eyes and looked like he wouldn't wake up if the building was on fire. Russell chuckled. Seeing Greg sleeping here at the lab wasn't unusual, since the young man generally hated going home before a case was finished, but he had already pulled a double shift a couple of days ago and seemed to be working himself much harder than usual. Russell decided to let him sleep rather than send him home. He was about to step forward to pour a cup of coffee when he noticed Greg's sleeve was riding up. It wasn't the sleeve that bothered him, but the pink lines in his wrist that caused him to take a closer look at the kind-hearted younger CSI.

He noticed that Greg was actually looking skinnier than he had just weeks ago and his clothes seemed a little loose fitting. The former DNA technician was lean to begin with so he really couldn't afford to lose weight and stay healthy. Greg moved slightly and let out a whimper in his sleep, telling Russell that he was having a nightmare. Greg had called in sick a few days ago, and now that he thought about it, Russell realized his voice had slurred slightly.

Russell wondered if Greg was having trouble with something. He listed what he had noticed in his head. Self harm, substance abuse, overworking himself, nightmares. He wondered if Greg was depressed, because that's what he was gathering from all of this. He turned away, thinking about what he should do, when Greg shot straight up. Russell looked back at Greg. His breathing was labored and his eyes were wide with terror. He was looking around like he couldn't remember how he got there.

"Greg!" Russell said, putting his hand on the man's shoulder. "It's okay Greg! You're at the lab, everything is fine, it was just a dream!" Greg looked at him like he thought Russell would hit him before shaking his head and putting his face in his hands, bringing his knees up to his chest. He crosses his arms on top of his knees before burying his face in them. He had slowed his breathing down to its normal rate, and it took Russell a moment to realize that Greg was crying. He sat down beside him and put a hand on his back comfortingly. After a few minutes, Greg lifted his head wiping away the tears that remained.

"Sorry." He said softly.

"Don't worry about it. Just tell me, what's bugging you." Russell commented.

"It's nothing." He shook his head. "Really it's stupid. I don't know why I freaked out like that." He shook his head.

"Greg, it's not stupid. Just tell me what you dreamed."

"I was trapped. In like a warehouse or something. And you all came in, and just laughed as I was chained to a wall and then you all just walked out and left me there." He confesses quietly, tears springing back into his eyes at the memory of the dream.

"Greg," Russell started. "You know we would never do that."

"I know, which is why I said it was stupid." He set his feet back on the floor and leaned so that his elbows rested on his knees and his face rested in his hands. Again, the lines on his wrist were showing, but he didn't seem to notice.

"Are you okay, Greg?" Russell asked.

"Yeah." He shrugged. "I'm fine."

"I can see your wrists." He remarked.

"Shit." Greg hastily pulled his sleeves down. The younger man rarely cussed, and the whole team knew that if he was cursing, he was really upset about something.

"Greg, it's okay. You can tell me what's wrong." Russell said gently. Greg looked up at him with fearful hazel eyes. He sighed and looked back at his hands.

"I just feel so...hurt. All the time. And nothing makes it go away. I can't sleep, I can't eat, I feel so alone." He choked out, tears sliding down his face once more. "I can stand in a room full of people, and feel like there's no one else in there. I've tried pills, I've tried booze, I've tried everything I can think of, but this is all that helps." He gestures to the cuts. "I can't remember the last time I was actually happy. I fake a smile everyday and I try so hard to feel better but I can't. And the worst part?" He looked at Russell when he asked the question. "No one even notices how much it hurts. Nobody notices that I'm lying about being happy, or that I've never been this bad. I've been depressed before, and I beat it. I was happy again, but now it seems like no matter what I do, I can't get over this." He was sobbing as he finished confessing to Russell. Russell rubbed his back and said nothing, knowing that Greg needed to get it all out.

"I just can't take it all the time. I wake up and I feel like I want to die. I don't want to be like this, but I'm just so consumed by this feeling. I can barely bring myself to get out of bed. I feel like I'm worthless, and I hate it."

Russell sighed, he didn't know what to say. He pulled Greg into a hug, knowing that he needed someone to be there for him right then. Greg leaned against him and just let everything out. He had been holding in all of his feelings for who knows how long, and it had been slowly killing him inside. Greg had fooled them all. He had never known that something was wrong and he guessed that no one else had noticed either. After a few minutes Greg pulled away and palmed his eyes clearing the rest of the tears in his eyes.

"Sorry." He apologized again.

"You don't have to be sorry, Greg. And I would prefer this than having to get a call out to your place."

"Yeah, I guess." He shrugged, emotionally drained from his explanation.

"Greg, if you ever wanna talk, my door is always open. And I know the others will say the same thing." Russell said to him. "You don't have to go through this alone." He put his hand on Greg's shoulder.

"I know, it's just, anyone else here wouldn't need help cause they wouldn't be in this position in the first place." He said sadly.

"Greg, you lead with your heart in everything you do. It makes sense that your heart is heavy. This doesn't make you weak or anything, this makes you human. All you need is someone to listen to you and to tell you that everything is gonna be just fine. You are gonna be just fine."

Greg gave a bitter laugh, but it was a laugh nonetheless.

"Thanks, Russell. I guess I did need to hear that." He said, giving up a small smile.

"Why don't you go home and try to get some rest." He told the young man. "You'll feel better after a couple of hours of sleep, and a good meal."

"I'll try, but I'm not promising anything." Greg shrugged.

"I guess that's all I can ask." Russell sighed. Greg stood up, and before he made it out the door, he turned around.

"Thanks Russell." He said, his soft hazel eyes catching a sparkle that Russell hadn't seen in a while. He was going to be fine.