A/N: First CF story! Yay, I have more than one story now! Hope you like! Please review, it would mean a lot.
Disclaimer: I do not own Chicago Fire no matter how much I wish I did. A girl can dream...
He was staring out the window, but not actually seeing anything. He was lost in thought, jumbled thoughts at that. At one moment he was thinking about one thing and the next, something completely different. He doesn't know if he should blame it on the fatigue that has been plaguing him for the past few days or the depression that has now settled deep within his bones. He wished he could stop it, but then again, he didn't want it to stop.
Part of him wants to be out there, doing things, planning things, doing anything that was better than sitting there.
The other part wants to stay here and gaze out the aforementioned window, silently wishing that he could stop thinking all together. The jumbled thoughts were all about her. He didn't want to not think about her because that would mean he was forgetting about her. No, he didn't want that. Never wanted that.
He hadn't eaten, slept, or left his house in a few days. No one had stopped by to check on him and he was half grateful for that. Part of him wanted someone here with him, and the other part of didn't want anyone seeing him like this. He was pretty sure he had about forty new text messages and about twenty missed calls, but he had misplaced his phone and had stopped his half-assed search ages ago. He deserved the isolation. All of this was his fault.
He was dressed in an old t-shirt and worn pair of jeans, sitting on the window sill clutching his knees to his chest. Tears were slowly leaking out his red rimmed eyes, trailing over dark circles that stood out against the paleness of his skin.
He held a small black velvet box in one hand.
He looked away from the window and opened it.
His heart clenched and his breath hitched in his chest as he tried to hold back the waterfall of tears.
He pulled the ring out of the slot with a shaking hand and stared at it for a moment.
In his hand he held the evidence.
The evidence that told him he hadn't done everything in his power to save her...
I'm so sorry...
He buried his face into his knees and his shoulders started to shake with the tears streaming freely, only letting up when he had no tears left.
He looked up again.
He was staring out the window, finally seeing he had no way, no way at all, to bring her back into his arms...
A/N: Review? Did you hate it, did you love it? I just felt like writing something sad. Don't ask me why 'cause frankly I do not know why. Love you guys!
-S.A.N.e-but-inS.A.N.e-
P.S. Look at my bunny! ()_()
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