We can act like come out of this world and leave the real one far behind.

"Hello, I'm Kurt Hummel. I'm gay and dead."

A sentence he never thought he'd say; a sentence no one thinks they'll ever say. Not that Lady Gaga - who he just confessed his position to – cared let alone knew he was there.

"Death is easy, just so you know," Kurt stated quietly turning to the microphone Gaga had left open, "It only takes a second, but... being dead is a whole other thing all together."

Stepping down from the stage, he marched down the aisle before stopping in front of Justin Bieber and looking him in the eye,

"You give people with high voices a bad name, get fucked."

Satisfied that his mission -appropriately titled 'Storming the VMA Awards'- was a success; if only people could see him so he could relish in what would be his fifteen minutes of fame, he began his walk back to Lima. If ghosts could fly he obviously hadn't figured it out yet, hell, he was still having trouble phasing through walls.

Boy, would Tina's obsession with death be handy.

"Come on Vanilla" Kurt called quietly to the dog sitting by the entrance as he exited the building. The giant mutt quickly followed, brushing against Kurt's right leg the entire way back to Lima as the crow flies, phasing though anyone or anything in their path.

-:-

"Does everything taste like broccoli to you?" Kurt asked, tilting his head to look Vanilla in the eyes. The dog was giving him a look which was clearly read as 'That's because all you eat is broccoli, dickhead'.

Kurt let out a deep sigh as he threw the stem of broccoli on the road. Vanilla was right; all he'd eaten was the dreaded green vegetable. Why? He didn't know; that's just how it was.

'Three frickin months of living on broccoli? What the fuck is up with that Hummel?' he'd imagine Puck saying before smacking him hard on the back and start laughing like a nut-job.

"What would I put on my résumé for my age? Sixteen years old or sixteen year living, three months dead?"

These kinds of questions kept circling each other in his trail of thought every day. Today, they decided to make a point of appearing as he lent against the brick wall of the coffee shop Mike worked at as he watched people rudely and unknowingly trample on his legs, with the occasional mild fumble when Kurt let his guard down and went solid for a split second.

"I'm bored, screw Mike. Come on Nilla."

Vanilla, aka Nilla when not in trouble or when Kurt wasn't in a mood, was dead dog. A mix of every breed known to man; but an awesome friend to Kurt none the less. Nilla followed Kurt everywhere and followed every order given and was an excellent source for a warm hug – for a ghost.

"Finn had a big history test yesterday... should we check if he passed it?" Kurt asked as he dodged the mess on people walking towards him. He'd gotten the hang of his phasing ability, but being solid was natural to him and he had yet to master his ability; knocking someone on the footpath and not have them know how it happened wasn't really an option, he hated the thought of sending someone mad if they obsessed over it.

Nilla gave a nod of approval whilst dodging the living; while the dog did everything Kurt said he still passed judgement on whether or not something was a bad idea.

Kurt's house hadn't changed much in three months. Sure, inside was a little messier but that was only due to Kurt's absence. Magazines weren't always neatly stacked, and the contents of the kitchen drawers weren't in a neat order; a system of if the drawers full dump it in the one underneath had developed. While there were plenty of other things a mess, those were the two that annoyed Kurt the most. After all the times Kurt went over the drawer set up with Carole and scolded Finn and his dad for throwing magazines any which way on the coffee table, he felt a little offend that they were so quick to forget.

But then again, they probably only remembered because he was constantly retelling them.

"Finn!" Kurt called uselessly as he phased through the front door, "Come on Nilla, you can come in."

With a nervous Nilla in tow, Kurt made his way to the basement. Yes, Finn had his own room but Kurt's room was bigger, and a better study space. If Finn wasn't sleeping, eating or out of the house he'd be in Kurt's room.

"Finn, how'd you go on the history test?" Kurt asked as he phased through his bedroom door. When he reached the bottom of the stairs he took in the sight before him.

The Glee Club sat around the room watching some movie on the TV.

"Is this for a Glee assignment?" Kurt asked cheerfully, stepping over his friends to get a view of the TV.

His heart stopped... or, at least, it would've if it could.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show, a guilty pleasure of his, was blaring at them.

Kurt was torn; turn the TV off or watch the rest. Kurt was favouring turning it off, seeing as how they were almost at the scene where Frank gives Brad head and there were really only two songs that were good for a laugh –the main reason Kurt loves it so much, it's a laugh... and Brad's hot and Tim Curry is awesome, otherwise the end is a bit of a drag... pun not intended- so there wasn't really any point to watch what was left. Plus, Kurt really didn't want them to know of his secret obsession, but it was a little late of the cover up now wasn't it?

"This was Finn's idea wasn't it? Or at least an idea upon an idea given by Rachel to dedicate a week's assignment to me before singing some ballad... and I missed the fall out for the VMAs? Damn, now it's gonna annoy me all week. What song do you think she sung Nilla?"

Kurt turned his head to find Nilla hadn't followed him down, he doubted that the dog had followed him very far past the kitchen. He hated being around Kurt's friends and family.

"And there it is, Hummel's reason for the obsession" stated Santana, bring Kurt's attention back to the movie.

"You actually told them I was obsessed!" Kurt shrieked at Finn, taking his eyes off the gay head job going down on screen.

"Actually, most of the time when he watched it, he'd skip the talking and go straight to the music" Finn mumbled nervously, eyes on the floor and a mouth full of popcorn.

Kurt stepped over his friends and sat on his bed. Staring at his friends, the circle of stupid questions returned.

"If ghosts have sex do you think they can get pregnant? Or catch STDs?"

A smash of glass and a yelp brought Kurt out of circle; only the glass caught his friend's attentions.

"What the hell was that?" asked Quinn.

"It was glass... silly Quinn" mumbled Kurt as he calmly got up and made his way up stairs.

"Shit, what do we do?" was the last thing Kurt heard before phasing through his bedroom door.

"Nilla? What'd you do?"

Nothing apparently. Nilla sat by the front door looking at Kurt, 'Yeah, something goes smash and it's my fault. Thanks of the sense of trust dick-weed.'

"I'm sorry that was me."

Kurt jumped as he turned to face a brunette woman in a white spaghetti strap dress. It's not like he hadn't meet any other ghosts, he even had the pleasure of meeting a few zombies, but he could always sense them and they wouldn't just walk randomly into his house!

"Who are you?"

"Elisa, and you are Kurt, yes?"

"Yeah?"

"Hi, I'm your guide."

"For what?"

"Being dead, well, being a ghost exactly. There's no guide to being dead, how can you mess that up?"

"How can you mess up being a ghost? No, look I've been dead three months isn't this a little late?"

Before Elisa could answer, Puck, Finn, Sam and Mike stormed out of the basement carrying various things to use as weapons.

"Why the hell was there a baseball bat in my room?" Kurt muttered, "And isn't Mike meant to be a work?"

Kurt turned to Nilla for an answer, 'We must have missed him leave.'

"Different. Look come with me, I'll talk you through it all. Don't worry I won't hurt you."

"I'm already dead, what could you possibly do to me now?"

"I like the way you think Kurt."