I.
The first time Hayner and Seifer ever fought was when they were both five years old, and their mothers introduced them, hoping for them to be best friends, or something close. But their plan failed, because from the moment they exchanged their first words, it would seem that they hated each other. It all started with the clash of Seifer's insensitive words and Hayner's short fuse.
"You look like a girl." The taller of the two laughs patronisingly at the other.
"I do not!" The other replies loudly.
"Do too!"
This quickly escalated and soon, their mothers come over to see what is wrong. After blaming Seifer for insulting him, Hayner temporarily superior, starting the crack in whatever friendship could be created. But they were just kids, who don't think about the past or the future – just the moral injustice of the present, and the happiness when something goes their way.
II.
The day that Hayner saw his father leave was the day he learnt of Seifer's inability to feel any sympathy. They were both 9 years old, too young to physically fight, yet old enough to insult, not that the latter couldn't do as much damage.
Being the good friends they were, Hayner's mum frantically told Seifer's mum the news, who sought to comfort her long-time friend. And naturally, she would invite her son, not knowing the strength of the relationship between the younger two.
The absence of a father couldn't stop their bickering, as they argued and argued just far enough for their parents not to hear. But as soon as the dispute started, it was ended at the peak of insults.
"Hey, at least I still have a dad!" Seifer exclaims, rudely – as if it's all some competition – and Hayner stands there, not knowing what to say for once. Instead, he storms off to his room, relying on the hope that their parents won't notice. And without realising it, he had just learnt the rules the hard way.
Hayner could have imagined his world being complete; having his whole family there, plus who he wished could be is best friend, Seifer – his idol, his enemy, and what seemed to be the centre of his world. But it's just fatherless Hayner and perfect Seifer, making their little worlds go round.
III.
Over the years to come, their relationship has developed into a competitive one. They fight every opportunity they get, and it's strange how Hayner gets some sort of thrill every time he does it. They pummel each other, they verse each other in Struggle, and 70% of the time, Hayner loses. But that doesn't faze him – he loves the adrenaline flowing through his body, and on the off chance that he does win, he makes it well known to the other.
He has made other friends to hang out with – Roxas, his best friend, Pence, his pudgy friend, and Olette, his female friend. They click together – unexpectedly, as they all have different personalities – and have gotten to know each other so well. But no one has to think too hard to guess where the bruises are coming from.
He only really bothers hiding the bruises from his mother, who is already disappointed at the number of calls from school she is getting about his endless fighting.
But they were at a stage in life, where the world could be summed up with one word: whatever. So he told this word to his mother, his friends, his school principle, and anyone else to lecture him on his behaviour, and didn't bother caring for the repercussions.
IV.
Soon, Hayner starts to get tired of the pain involved when fighting him, the disappointed looks from his mother, and the eye-rolling and worried sighs of his friends.
His friends aren't much of a help either; Pence is too passive to give him much help, Roxas usually just gets angry himself, and Olette just confuses him when she giggles and asks, "how else is all the sexual tension between you two going to be released?"
He always thinks to himself that he's going to just walk away, but when Seifer calls out to him, trying to provoke him, he really doesn't think he has any choice.
He waits for the irritation to spark him and the anger to fill him, but it doesn't, and tiredly waits for the stronger of the two to approach him. When the other insults him some more, he sighs and stands up straighter, because he doesn't want to lose another fight to Seifer, especially if it seems like their manliness is being tested.
V.
When Hayner reaches 11th grade, he makes what would probably be the most reckless decision in his life; a split decision that even his friends wouldn't anticipate.
He's so tired of his fights with Seifer, and the only resolution he can figure out is to make a new life, failing to realise that, at such a young age and without a job, it's pretty much impossible. But he doesn't bother with this; he just wants to get away from Seifer and his gang and everything else to do with him.
So he packs his bags when everyone was asleep and calls Roxas, who tries his hardest to convince him otherwise. However, during all his angry ramblings, Hayner mentions the town he's most likely to go to, and his best friend thinks of a plan.
When Hayner had gathers all his savings – a measly $200 – he drives with the second-hand car his parents had recently bought him and drives to the next city, stopping overnight at the first hotel he can find. In the morning when he goes to eat at the small restaurant inside the hotel, he panics when he spots a familiar blonde with a beanie waiting in the lobby. He tries to walk through the lobby as subtly as he can, but ends up walking into a pillar when he keeps staring at the other.
Seifer has already seen him, looking angry at the sight of him, and grabbs him by the elbow, dragging him outside. Hayner braces himself for a punch or something equally painful, but instead, Seifer merely talks harshly but not loud enough for anyone else to hear.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing, lamer?"
"Me? What about you? What are you doing here?" Hayner's irritation is sparked, and he goes into defensive mode.
"You idiot! You've got no job, you're 17, and you're friends are worried about you!" Seifer tries to reason with him with narrowed eyes.
"Then why are you here?" He's shouting now, unable to control his frustration.
"I came here to get you the fuck back home! Your little boyfriend told me your stupid plan, blaming me for whatever made you come here."
"Bullshit, and he's not my boyfriend, fuckwit." Hayner spits.
"You're coming with me whether you like it or not." Seifer states, matter-of-factly.
"No I'm not." He replies stubbornly, but after coming all this way, Seifer isn't about to give up – not that he ever would.
"Anyway, I've got no car, so either you come back or I'm stealing your car." He has that signature smirk on again, and Hayner knows he won't win this.
"Douche." Hayner huffs, but then curiosity gets the better of him. "How'd you find me, anyway?"
"Saw your car, asked around, and waited." He shrugs, as if it took no effort at all.
"Oh." They've got nothing else to say, and as a result of this experience, Hayner stupidly thinks that this is the start of a better phase in their relationship.
VI.
A few weeks later, Hayner feels like Seifer's trying to imprint his face into the concrete, trying to burst his stomach with all the kicks and punches being thrown at him. And the whole time, Hayner can't help almost scolding himself about how useless he is, if he can't even put up a good fight, and how sure he is that Seifer deserves a better opponent.
He doesn't even know what he did to deserve him – but with Seifer, he never knows, and he's not quite in a situation where he can concentrate.
The one-sided fight is over almost as suddenly as it began, with no words spoken between them, and Hayner regrets his decision to stay, instead of running away like he tried. He doesn't quite know why he stayed, and when the thought strikes him that it might just be love, he almost feels sick.
So he shakily stands up, and wobbles his way to Roxas's house, knowing the way so well that he doesn't even have to think about it anymore. He tries to hold onto his senses, capturing the blurring street lights and the hard pavement against his shoes, but when he finally collapses on the porch, his best friend doesn't even have to ask what happened.
VII.
Hayner had always liked routine – it was easy, and he knew what would happen next. But there were times where that routine was annoyingly varied, and the worst and most memorable of these would have to be in 12th grade, where the strong hands of Seifer are replaced – just this once – by those of Rai.
He's insulting him, calling him the trademark name – "Chickenwuss" – and it's just so wrong, because that should be Seifer's voice calling out to him, not that of another man's. Those should be Seifer's hands grabbing him so harshly, Seifer's bluish-green eyes he stares into when he hears those words. There should be a scar to focus on, on the bridge of his nose, and there should definitely be no mention of "y'know", at all.
But he's saved from this tedious punishment when the voice he has been waiting for shouts out to his friend.
"Rai, what the fuck are you doing?" Seifer's rough voice is layered with confusion and anger.
"Just giving him a beating, the usual, y'know" Rai replies, as if trying to reason with Seifer.
"Well fucking quit it!"
"Why?" Rai exclaims, and Hayner waits for the answer, hoping it is one of protectiveness.
"Because he's mine" the blonde's voice is full of authority, and no one – not even Rai or Fuu – would dare cross him. "I'm the only one allowed to hurt him." He continues, ruining the previous statement. Hayner's pretty sure he'd prefer an answer more like, 'Because I love him'.
What irritates him the most is how misleading and confusing the words, 'he's mine' are, and even more so, the different circumstances it could be used in.
But Seifer's a pretty stoic – yet cryptic – man, and if anyone's figured this out, it's Hayner. Instead of dwelling on it, he just tries to tell himself that there's still a chance, because he knows it's easier to lie to himself than to accept the truth, and he's always been the stubborn one of the two, anyway.
VIII.
A few months later, Hayner figures out that, although he's never liked the fights him and Seifer engage in, the ignoring might just be even worse.
It would almost appear as if they had never known each other, were it not for the fleeting glances they exchange, like an awkward pair hiding a secret. Their eyes flicker between each other, shifting after realising the other can notice. But Hayner thinks he's finally going crazy; he could've sworn there was guilt in those eyes. But he knows it isn't in Seifer's nature to regret anything.
He's surprised at just how much he's associated with him. The sky, the sea, manliness, brutality, and anything else that resembles any of his features.
He's just so confused about the whole situation, but he knows he has to be careful. So he does the only thing he sees as rational – consult Olette. Because, as Hayner sees it, she's a girl, and girls have feelings. Therefore she can solve anything.
"Olette, he's ignoring me. Again." He sighs, shamelessly staring at the other man.
"I know. You've told me enough times already." She says, bluntly.
"But Olette! I don't know what to do!" He whines now, holding his head in his hands out of frustration.
"The way I see it, you're obsessed. I'm sure he'll come around." She almost rolls her eyes at Hayner's frantic state, but swiftly changes the conversation. Not that every fourth sentence Hayner says isn't about Seifer, but Olette just ignores it.
He still tries to convince himself not to care, that it's just Seifer – his enemy – but without his fellow Struggler, it seems there's nothing for his life to revolve around like it did before.
IX.
For months they don't talk or fight at all, just exchanging the same glances – but they're awkward and momentary and embarrassing and definitely not enough to last Hayner for the rest of his life, he thinks. So, when he decides he can't take anymore of being ignored, he decides to something.
He "accidentally" trips into the other, and then apologises, hoping it would spark a reaction out of the other. And it's successful – though not entirely original.
"Ugh, in the way as always" Seifer spits angrily at him, and he could've sworn he heard him mumble, "fucking useless."
"I'm sorry, okay? Jeez. I get it. I'm sorry I have to always ruin your life." He scowls at the other, even though he told himself he wouldn't get angry.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get so angry like that. I didn't mean it, I swear." Seifer sighs tiredly, surprising Hayner so much that all he can do is nod at the other and walk away.
He's still worried about what the other said – he doesn't always get in the way, and it's not his fault that Seifer's always so angry towards him. But where there's smoke, there's fire, and it still nags at his mind.
X.
When Hayner and Seifer met in the Sandlot, Hayner didn't even have enough energy to get frustrated. The other looked worried about something, and that usually wasn't a good sign. So he braced himself for one more fight, because he didn't have enough energy to really try. He didn't care what the other would think, and he didn't even care if he died.
But instead, Seifer stood awkwardly and said, "There's something I want to show you."
"It isn't an axe that you're going to chop my head off with or something, is it?" Hayner tries to joke sarcastically, while hoping it's something cheesy and that he's declaring his love for him or something. Something cheesy that would never happen, he thinks.
"Uhh, no. Follow me." And with that, Hayner is lead to a hill that he used to visit with Roxas, Pence and Olette, where the sunset is even prettier. When they get there, Seifer just says, "isn't it nice?"
"Yeah... why are we here?" Hayner asks, completely confused.
"I wanted to apologise for being such an asshole to you."
"Oh... why."
"Because, you know... you're not half bad." And Seifer's hand is holding his, and his eyes are so sincere that it's as if they're making an agreement by eye contact, and he thinks he can accept it."
"Watch it with me. Please." Seifer asks him, and Hayner's so happy that he could burst, so he stays with the other, because this is what he's been waiting for.
And watching the sunset, they feel the stress of the past years being blown away by the slight breeze. They lay to their hearts' content, because they've never been together like this before, and it's more than they could have ever hoped for.