DISCLAIMER: This manga/anime and all its original contents and characters are not mine.

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A/N: Inspired by "Suck My Kiss" [Red Hot Chili Peppers] Also, Ryuk is human in this story, though there aren't any physical descriptions of him.

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Summary: AU. Yagami Light, a yakuza underboss, was intrigued by the legend of a class A prostitute known by the alias L. He was pretty expensive that, after a night of ecstasy, Light found himself buried in a billion-dollar debt.

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NIRVANA

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"Hey, Light!"

The addressee of the little interjection turned his attention away from the magazine he was reading. This is it, he thought preparing himself for the long speech he was going to hear again. Anyone would think that he must have been used to it by now, Ryuk's occasional talkativeness. Unfortunately, he still wasn't. "What is it, Ryuk?" he said glancing briefly a the huge bulk of the man who had been his bodyguard since he was a child before boring his eyes once more on the page of the sweet graphic novel where the protagonist was beheading some monster.

Panting heavily from all the running he had done, Ryuk settled beside his young boss and grinned. "Hey, does the little oyabun [capo] know the big E for today?"

"No. Care to tell me?" he asked obligingly. It was one of his many responsibilities as the Family's underboss, to stay informed at all times. Snort. Being born within the yakuza, and the son of the big boss at that, was always regarded by him as a blessing, though right now, to him, it was utterly frustrating. With his rank, he could get classified information giving away the goings-on of the underworld but he couldn't get his hands on the blood he wanted to spill so much in his life. He would push said thoughts afterward, he knew the moment he takes over he could have all the action he had been craving for.

Ryuk took a fairly large bite of the deliciously red apple in his hand, chewed for a while, and grinned, a little suggestive this time. "Hehe. Europe's on frenzy right now. L's on for the bidding today."

Light turned a page. The information this time was completely unclassified though he couldn't deceive himself into thinking that he wasn't in any way interested. "So?" he said, his voice sounding completely apathetic. "What am I supposed to do about that?"

"I thought you might want to spend some money out there," he munched on the apple again and talked on with a muffled voice, "though you won't be spending any since you won't be the highest bidder anyway."

It was almost an insult but Light's anger wasn't roused in any way, his bodyguard was just being honest.

"But Light, I really want to see how the auction looks like."

Light readied himself for the long rant that was supposed to follow [so it counts as him being a little familiar to Ryuk's talkativeness, right? But he'd still say he wasn't used to it at all.], like how pretty the "Casa" might look like, how hot the girls [and guys] on bid must be, how L would look like. He would be pretty right? He was, after all, equivalent to a Tayuu [highest ranked courtesan] though he'd probably be taken again by some billionaire or an internationally renowned mafia don perhaps.

Yagami thought Ryuk looked almost cute, the way he chattered in between the munching, how he raised his revolver in the air many times all the while not noticing it. It showed pretty much how excited he was about the whole ordeal, though he could only fantasize about it. Well actually, the seventeen-year-old underboss was just as as excited as his bodyguard but he simply wouldn't show it. He couldn't allow himself to show interest about some prostitute no matter how famous he was on his trade. After all, a future boss must stay dignified at all times. However, without his converser noticing, his head had flown far-off asking why those billionaires and dons would spend so much for a single night of screwing. Was L really that good?

Ryuk continued chewing on the remnants of the fruit he had been eating. "It's pretty interesting to note that L rose to his rank seven years ago and managed to maintain it without falling all the while. He's so amazing. Don't tell anyone, baby boss, but I think I'd want to screw him." 'Baby boss' was flustered at the last statement and he was too flustered he didn't say anything. "Well, I'm telling you this 'cause I'm leaving today. I've already prepared my passport." He waved the said passport at 'baby boss' ' face.

"What?" Still wearing the indifferent mask on his face Light left the gory manga and stared incredulously at Ryuk's large eyes. He could see the serious look therein and he at once began to doubt the man's sanity. "Weren't you the one who said even I wouldn't be able to afford him?"

"Aw, I was just joking, you know. Our family could rival the best in the world in strength and in wealth, that much I know. Anyway," said the bodyguard with a sigh, "I knew I would never be able to get laid but I'd really want to see him, just once. That'd be a nice fulfillment of an old man's dying wish, ne, baby boss?"

A long silence followed. At last, looking pretty disgusted, Light sighed. "Really, Ryuk. Go, get lost for all I care."

Another silence followed. Light looked thoroughly annoyed by now. "What now?"

A pair of fingers twirled nervously at the grip of the sleek revolver recklessly laid down on the tatami mat. "Well, you see, Light-kun," Yagami knew that when Ryuk calls him that there would be something in store for him, "this old man can't get out of the country without your dad's permission so..."

He knew it. Hiding a smile, he closed his eyes for a while. This was one of the many blessings he had, having Ryuk as his bodyguard. He knew that the man was pretty interested about the Casa and its main attraction so Light would let him be and listen to his rantings. Light also knew that the said attraction would be auctioned afterwards and that Ryuk, being a person who would do everything to obtain his desires, would naturally want to go to the auction and concoct some alibi that would allow him to go. And he, Yagami Light, would be the alibi.

"...I'd really appreciate it if you tell your dad that I'd be accompanying you. I'd serve you till I die, you know."

He seemed to consider his bodyguard's words for a moment and then he sighed. With a smile he looked at the older man's face. "Well, I wanted to say no, but really, I couldn't bring myself to refuse you, Ryuk."

"Yatta!"

"Tell our men to prepare the plane. We'd be flying to England this afternoon." As expected, Ryuk was ecstatic, hugging his boss happily for putting up with his crazy whims. Inwardly, Light snickered. As usual, everything goes according to plan.

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to be continued.

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(^_^)

Please review, reader-sama. Onegaishimasu!