Not Mine
Summary:
Soubi
is not really Ritsuka's. He belongs to Seimei. Ritsuka knows this
but he can't stop the feelings he has for his brother's fighter.
SoubiXRitsuka. One-shot. Rated Teen for Shonen-Ai to light Yaoi.
Please review. Constructive criticism is fine, but no flames.
Disclaimer:
I do
not own Loveless or the characters. The only thing I claim is the
plot for this story, so please don't take it or I will have to send
my evil cat Ysabella out to get you. Believe me she is EVIL! LOL.
Oh by the way, thoughts are in italics. That's all for now. Read on.
"Why are you guys here?" Ritsuka asked.
He had spotted the 'Zero' boys on the way to the cafeteria. He now walked with them down an empty hall.
"We need to talk to you." Natsuo said.
"Can't it wait? I'm in school now if you hadn't noticed." Ritsuka said annoyed.
"I guess that's for you to decide." Youji said.
"We just thought you would want to know as soon as possible." Natsuo said.
"Since it is about your brother, Seimei…" Youji started.
"…And your boyfriend, Soubi." Natsuo finished.
"Soubi and Seimei? OK tell me, but I have to be back to class in a few minutes." Ritsuka said.
"Soubi and Seimei are secretly meeting once a week." Youji said.
"We have followed him the past few times…" Natsuo said.
Every word was torture to Ritsuka. He hated that Soubi never told him anything.
"…But we did not dare get close enough to hear what they were saying." Youji said.
"Thanks guys." Ritsuka said as he turned to leave.
He didn't want to hear anymore of what they had to say.
"Hey, Ritsuka. One more thing." Natsuo said.
"Yea?" Ritsuka said as he turned back to face them.
"It's just a hunch, but we believe…" Youji said but was cut off by the bell.
"I've got to get to class. Can we finish talking after school?" Ritsuka said, grateful for the bell.
"Sure. Meet us in the park." Natsuo said.
"OK." Ritsuka said as he dashed off.
(Ritsuka's POV)
The rest of the day went by agonizingly slow. I could not concentrate. I just stared out the window. My mind kept drifting to what Youji and Natsuo had told me.
Why didn't he tell me? He never tells me anything so why start now. He promised to tell me the truth, yet he always lies. He says 'I love you.' but he never means it. Why do I care? He's not mine anyways. He belongs to Seimei. He's only doing this because Seimei told him to. Soubi will never be mine. Of course I know this, so why does my heart ache so much. It's not because he went behind my back. He does that all the time, and it hurts but not like this. No, this pain is much, much worse. I feel as if my heart was torn in two. Is this what it's like to be in love? That's it. I'm in love. I'm in love with Soubi. That's why it hurt so much to hear that Soubi is seeing Seimei. I love Soubi, but he's not min. I know we can never be together, and that hurts more than anything. But I won't give up. Not just yet. I know it won't make any difference, but I want him to know how I feel. After school, I'll do it after school today. I resolved.
The last bell finally rang. I ran to my locker and was out the door before most kids had even left their classrooms. There he was, leaning against the gate smoking. I knocked the cigarette onto the ground and smashed it with my foot. I hate smoking. I think he just does it to annoy me. He looked down at me and smiled.
"I saw the 'Zero' boys earlier. They told me that they were going to meet you after school, but I asked them not to." He said as he reached a hand up to my face.
I pushed it away. Who does he think he is fooling with all his 'kind' gestures?
"Why did you do that? I needed to talk with them." I said, but secretly I was relieved.
I had completely forgotten that I said I would meet them. All my thoughts were on him.
"Why not talk with me?" He said.
The way he said it made me want to reach up and kiss his soft gentle lips.
"OK, but we should leave before Yuiko and Yayoi see us." I said, amazed I could speak.
'Gladly.' was all he said before he grabbed me and dragged me along.
"Where are we going?" I asked as if I didn't know.
"To my apartment. You want to talk. Right?" he said.
"Yea." I said as we neared his apartment.
"Ritsuka, are you coming in?" He asked as he held the door open for me.
I nodded and walked in. I heard him close the door behind me and I heard his foot steps following me. He had no need to lead. I knew where I was going. I opened the door to his room and sat down on his bed. He sat down next to me. Everything was silent. Neither of us wanted to be the first one to talk. It was too quiet. I could not stand it any longer. Just as I opened my mouth to speak I heard his voice. It was soft, barley above a whisper.
"I love you." He said.
There they were again. Those three little words that he always said but never meant. After all, how could he? I am 'Loveless'. 'Loveless'- one with out love. You see, I could never be loved, especially by him. Soubi. 'Beloved'- to be loved. Our names are the total opposite. It is not that I can't love, rather that I am destined to never be loved.
"Stop saying that! Just-Just stop!" I said.
I felt the bed move as he scooted closer to me. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close to him.
"You've been seeing Seimei again. Natsou and Youji told me. They followed you a few times they said." I told him as I tried to sit back up.
He would not let me. Man he was annoying sometimes.
"I'm sorry, Ritsuka. You can punish me if you like. Please punish me. I deserve it." He almost begged.
"It's OK. I don't mind. You're Seimei's after all, not mine. You don't have to get my permission to see him." I said.
I tried to say it cheerfully, but he saw through me.
"Ritsuka, I've never belonged to Seimei. I have always been yours." He said, still holding on to me.
"What do you mean? You and Soubi share the name 'Beloved'." I said.
"Well kinda, but it was not always that way. He made me his. This name..." He said.
His words faded as he touched the bandage on his neck.
"This name was never meant to be mine. He carved this wretched name onto me ane made me his. I was never meant for him." He said with hate.
I jerked away from him. I was scared. I had never seen him like that and he scared me. I never wanted to see him like that agian.
"Soubi, if your real name is not Beloved then what is it?" I asked looking right at Soubi for the first time that day.
"Isn't it obvious, Ritsuka. We share a special bond." He said.
"A special bond? Soubi, do you mean..." I said
"Yes, Ritsuka. A bond that only a fighter and sacrifice who share a name can have. Seimei knew I was rightfully yours, but he stole me from you. But now, here I am with you where I belong. Do with me as you please. Make me yours, and yours alone. I love you more than anything." He said as he looked at me with those beautiful deep purple eyes.
For once I could see the truth in his eyes. He actually meant every word he said. Those eyes, those words just made my heart melt. I was confused, though.
"But how? I am 'Loveless'- one with out love. How can I be loved?" I said.
"Ritsuka, you misunderstood it. 'Loveless' does not mean one with out love. It simply means to not know love. As 'Loveless', we can still have love and be loved." He said as he got off my bed and kneeled in front of me.
I was speechless, so I did the only thing I could. I reached out and pulled his face up to mine. I pressed my lips against his and kissed him. He kissed me back. When we could last no longer we pulled back. In desperate need of air we settled for looking into each others eyes.
(Soubi's POV)
When we had caught our breath, Ritsuka lifted his hand up to my face. He caressed my cheek then pulled me in so our lips almost touched.
"I love you, Soubi." He said and I could feel his warm breath on my face.
It was amazing how four words could reduce someone like me into a frozen statue of a man. I had waited so long to hear him say those words, yet I could not move or speak. I guess love and spell battles are alike in a way. Words are power. I finally regained my composure. I stood up. Ritsuka just gave me an adorable sad look. I picked him up and laied him down on the bed. I carefully sat on top of him so I did not squish him. He had such a cute look in his normally stoic eyes.
"S-S-So-oubi?" Ritsuka said.
I could tell he was very confused. I leaned sown so my mouth was right next to his ear.
"Make me your's, Ritsuka." I whispered and I felt the fragile body under me shiver.
"B-But, your ears." He managed to squeak.
I propped myself up so I could look into his eyes. It was so like Ritsuka to bring something like that up at such a time. Luckily, I was prepared to answer that question.
"Ritsuka-kun, I did not give them away. They were taken. Besides, you don't need my ears to make me yours. Make me your first, Ritsuka. Make me your's so you will not have to suffer like I did." I said.
All Ritsuka could manage was a weak nod, but it was enough for me. I gently reached down and began to pull his shirt up. I stopped suddenly when I heard a small laugh. I knew who it was before I even looked up. Kio stood at the doorway to my room with an amused look. I glared at him.
"Don't stop on my account. I enjoy watching." Kio said with a playful smirk on his face.
I looked back down at the boy that lay under me. He was sound asleep. I carefully got off him. I did not want to wake him up. Once I stood on the ground, I reached back down to cover him up. Something caught my eye. A little piece of gauze stuck out from under his slightly lifted shirt. I immediately knew what it was. I lifted his shirt more to find a two inch strip of gauze wrapped around his waist. It was tied in the back but I could not reach it.
"Kio, go grab a pair of scissors." I said quiet but firm.
When he came back, he handed me the scissors and stood beside me. I lifted the gauze a little and carefully cut it. What I found sickened me. A deep gash stretched across most of the front of his waist. Kio gasped.
"Did his mother do that?" Kio asked shocked.
"No doubt." I said as I put the gauze back down over th wound.
I could not stand it any longer. My anger level was at its maximum.
She went way too far this time. I will never let this happen to you again, Ritsuka. I silently swore.
With that, I covered him up and headed for the door.
"What a shame." Kio said as he gave Ritsuka a sympathetic glance and shook his head.
Then he followed me out, closing the door quietly be hin him.
"We should let him sleep." I said as I calmed myself down.
"What are you going to do? You're not going to let him stay there are you?" Kio said.
I wanted to start screaming. I wanted to say, 'I'd die before I let him go back to that house, and face that woman again.' But I kept calm.
"Well ultimately it's his choice, but I have been wanting him to get out of there ever since I met him. I can't stand to see him like this." I admitted.
"Those 'Zero' boys left, so why not invite him to move in with you?" Kio asked.
"I'm going to, but I don't know if he will accept the offer. He, for some reason, feels... sympathy for his mother or something like that. I don't really understand it." I said with a sigh.
A few hours later, Ritsuka woke up. I saw his sleepy figure appear from my bedroom. He was so cute rubbing his eyes and stretching.
"Did you have a nice nap?" I asked from the kitchen.
"Yea. Your bed is comfy." He said as he walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table.
He yawned. It was so cute. I guess I find everything he does cute.
"Would you like something to eat? Kio dropped by and left us some soup." I said as I pointed to the pot sitting on the burner.
"Sure, that sounds good." He said.
I got out two bowls and poured some soup into them. I grabbed two spoon and set the food on the table. Then I grabbed two cans of pop out of the fridge and set them on the table as well. I sat down, across from Ritsuka and we started eating.
"Um, Soubi." Ritsuka said as he looked up at me.
"Yes, Ritsuka." I said as our eyes met.
"I-I'm sorry for falling asleep." He said as he looked away sheepishly.
He had obviously fallen asleep before he had a chance to notice Kio.
"Ritsuka-kun, don't worry. It's OK. It was obviously too much for you, especially in the state you are in." I said as his eyes shot back up and met my gaze once again.
"You noticed?" He asked me.
"How could I not, Ritsuka?" I said.
"It was an accident. She didn't mean to. It really looks worse than it is. I'm fine. I promise." He said almost franticly.
"Ritsuka, how much longer are you going to cover for her? I can't stand by and watch this go on any longer. You need to get out of there." I said firmly.
Ritsuka bowed his head.
"You're right, Soubi, but I have no where to go." He said as a tear rolled down his cheek.
I walked over to him. I tilted his head up and wiped off the tear. Then I gave him a short kiss and stood in front of him.
"If you would like, Ritsuka, you can move in with me." I said.
"Really?" He said as his eyes grew wide.
"Yea. Only if you want. You do not have to." I said.
"I do want to, Soubi. I'd love that, but..." he said.
His words faded as he reached up and touched his cat ears.
"Ritsuka, I will be yours with or with out your cat ears. Those can wait as long as you need. What is important is that you are here, safe with me. I will protect you." I said.
Ritsuka stood up and hugged me.
"Thank you, Soubi. I love you." He said.
That night Ritsuka slept at my house and the next day we moved all his things from his mom's house. The 'Loveless' team together, under one roof. Just how it was meant to be.
The End
Author's Notes:
Oh my gosh. I am so proud of myself. This is my first Loveless fan fic and my first oneshot. I had so much inspiration for this fan fic that I wrote the whole thing in one afternoon. I just thought of the idea for this sitting in church. Kinda odd I know, but I think I did a pretty good job on it. Just a reminder this is a oneshot. Please review. Constructive criticism is fine, but no flames. I know my grammar and spelling stinks, and I'm sorry. Please feel free to check out my other stories and I am planing on writing more Loveless fan fics in the future. Thanks a lot.
Bye, Bri-Chan
