This is a really short and very quick one-shot written for myself mostly. I wrote it really fast, so I'm sorry if there are any errors. It's not beta'd, all mistakes are mine.

I'm so heartbroken right now, I don't know how to explain it.

Well, this is set after the finale, on the plane, "island time".

My condolences to all fellow skaters. Thank god we still have fanfiction.

A Broken Hallelujah

Sawyer leaned his head against the plane seat as he looked out the window. He felt restless, he never thought he would ever get on a plane again, never thought he would ever get off this rock, but here he was on a plane on his way off the island. He had lost count of how many times they had tried and failed getting off so he wouldn't be at all surprised if they crashed now. Or if they went out of fuel again, or if a bird flew into the engine and the whole thing exploded. It wouldn't surprise him one bit, so he decided not to get excited about this until he could feel steady ground under his feet. Until he saw civilization, he wouldn't celebrate.

From the corner of his eye he could see Kate and Claire tense up every time turbulence would hit. They would squeeze each other's hands until their knuckles turned white and whisper words of comfort back and forth.

Miles had promptly fallen asleep, probably to stop thinking about where they were and about what could happen if things went wrong again. Neither of them dared to have too much faith, they had learned long ago not to get their hopes up.

All Sawyer could think off as they flew through the air, were all the empty seats around them. People were missing. They were too few. Jack, Charlie, Hurley, Juliet… Sawyer closed his eyes as his mind presented him the smiling image of Juliet and his hands clenched around the arm leans. And Hurley. Goddamnit, Hurley. They had left the poor bastard around with that bug-eyed Other and a crazy Scottish man.

"You okay?"

He opened his eyes, blinked. Kate's worried face came into view, the telltale frown between her eyebrows.

"Yeah," he said, shaking his head a little to get rid of the images. "Yeah. Just… Does this seem real to you at all?"

Kate smiled that sad little smile of hers. "No." She sighed and took a seat next to him. Sawyer glanced at Claire, finding her asleep against the window. "No, it doesn't."

She was looking down at her clasped hands, her hair falling in front of her face and she tucked it behind her ear.

"We're all going to need major therapy," Sawyer stated, trying to lighten the mood and she actually smiled at that. He felt better instantly.

"No doubt about that."

A silence fell between them and for the first time in a while, it was a relaxed silence.

Eventually, Kate did a small intake of breath. "I'm sorry she died," she said, glancing up at him through her eyelashes before quickly looking away again.

"I'm sorry he did, too."

Kate's lip trembled as she nodded, blinking profusely with a choked, "Yeah."

Sawyer smiled softly and squeezed her knee. "I guess it's you and me now, Freckles."