"Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them." - Marcus Aurelius
They drove for miles.
It was a rare occasion that Morgan didn't drive, but only Reid knew where they were going. Morgan had known something was wrong, so he'd simply followed Reid to his car, climbed in, and they had stared at each other until Reid switched on the ignition.
Morgan did wonder where they were going as they drove out of the city, but he didn't ask. He had worried his friend was going to do something drastic, although he couldn't fault him for those feelings in the wake of what had happened.
They were far out from the city by the time they stopped, in what seemed like the middle of nowhere, and Reid simply parked and stepped out into the warm night air. Morgan followed the man around to the front of the car, and leant on the bonnet with him.
"I was going to bring Emily here."
Morgan resisted the urge to comment that it was the middle of a field.
Reid tipped his head back, his arms folded tightly around his chest. Morgan looked up too, his own hands braced on the bonnet of the car. Suddenly he understood.
The sky was full of stars.
This far away from the city the light pollution was gone, just a distant gradient on the horizon; here the inky blanket of the sky was dusted with tiny pinpricks of white and gold.
"I thought it would be interesting." He gave a soft bitter laugh. "I thought it would be romantic."
Morgan didn't say anything; without explanation he knew Reid would much rather be here with Emily, their friend, Spencer's lover. At the same time he knew it was a big deal that Reid would share this with him, so he continued to stare into the sky, drinking in the beauty, hoping his awe did justice to the sight and the meaning.
"You know the last conversation we had?" Reid asked. Morgan knew he wasn't meant to answer. "She said, 'Hey, what's that?'" he recalled. "'Ohh, it's the only lead I have so far. What about you? Seaver said you were looking for photos of Doyle's Tuscan villa?'" he spoke quickly, recalling the conversation from memory. "'Couldn't find any stills from the day he was arrested, but there may be some surveillance footage from the Sedans, they generally record everything.' ... And she said 'Yeah?' and I walked away. She was fishing for what we knew about Doyle. That was the last conversation I had with her. No 'I love you's, no 'goodbye's."
He dropped his eyes from the heavens, breathing in through his nose slowly.
"I don't even know why I brought you here."
"Maybe," Morgan said carefully, "keeping this place a secret was too painful. You needed to tell someone, show them what it means."
"Meant. I doesn't mean anything now."
"It means everything now." Morgan disagreed. "She's gone, but you're never going to forget her. Gift and a curse."
Morgan could feel Reid considering him, so he turned his face to him and smiled sadly. He wasn't sure he could give the reassurance he needed to.
"The Karanga people of South Africa believe the stars are the eyes of the dead." He said blankly. "Actually a lot of the stars we can see are already gone, the light takes that many hundreds or thousands or millions of years to reach us. Dead stars that still shine."
Morgan watched as Reid tilted his head back again, a tear running out over his temple and into the shell of his ear.
"Look at all those stars; look at god damn ugly the stars are." – Alkaline Trio: Trouble Breathing