Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot. The characters are owned by Tamora Pierce and her publishers, and the song is owned by N*SYNC and their producers.
A/N: Just to let you all know, I think Alanna and Jon are made for each other. Moving on--this is dedicated to Lexi, my friend and muse, who is in love with George Cooper ~ Juanita Songfalls aka the Moose Mistress aka Gish Hew
This I Promise You
One last kiss. That was what it came to. He was married, and this was her wedding day. But he would never stop loving her, and all his passion was poured into that one last kiss.
When the visions around you
Bring tears to your eyes
Jon pulled back. Alanna gave him a wry smiled. "This is it. Wish me luck."
"You don't need luck," Jon told her. "You have love. You have everything you've ever wanted."
Alanna looked up at him. "Not quite," she said softly.
And all that surrounds you
Are secrets and lies
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"By the time I was ready to marry, you had someone else. But before then, I wasn't ready to be Queen. Now I wonder if I should have done it. I'll be the first to tell anyone I've made mistakes in my life. But what if the life I've chosen is a mistake? And it's to late to turn back now."
I'll be your strength
I'll give you hope
Keeping' your faith when it's gone
"You and I both know we couldn't have been together in this lifetime. I had to marry someone the people of Tortall could except, and you have to marry someone who will let you roam, and still loves you like I do. George is that person."
"When I found out you were marrying Thayet, I was happy, but I also felt something I'd never felt before. It was like I was loosing something I always took for granted. Your love. I lost your love. You wouldn't always be there for me. There was someone if front of me in line, and she wasn't ever going anywhere. She was never moving on."
The one you should call
Was standing here all along
Jonathan leaned in and kissed her with all the passion of his earlier kiss. "I'll never stop loving you. Not now, or in a hundred thousand years. Someday, in some life, we'll be together. Some day, you will be accepted for who you are. Someday, I'll be King no longer. When that day comes, I swear by Minthros we'll be together."
And I will take
You in my arms
And hold you right where you belong
Alanna put her arms tightly around Jon's neck and gave him on last peck on the cheek. "'Til then," she murmured under her breath. "I'll never forget this day. Promised to two men within the time of just one hour." She laughed.
She loosened her grip, finally pulling away. Alanna straightened her white skirts, then twirled around. She was a vision of beauty, and in that second, as she spun, that beauty was unmatchable, not even by Thayet. At least, she was so in Jon's eyes.
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you
This I promise you
"It's time for us to go back to those we're sworn to love," he told her.
"I miss being able to do what I want when I want," she said. "I guess giving that up was the first step I took toward really growing up." She looked at him with a reminiscent smile on her face.
"You really love him, don't you?"
"I do."
Her red locks, which ended just above her shoulders, framed her face. She had just a tiny bit of makeup on her face. A bit to add color to her cheeks, and some to deepen the color of her lips. She looked like a china doll. Jon wondered how he could have ever thought her unfeminine.
I loved you forever
In lifetimes before
Mistress Eleni Cooper of Olau walked in to the room, her eyes teary. Jon knew she had been like a mother to Alanna, and now truly was, since Myles had been wed to her. On top of that, it was her son Alanna would be marrying that day. George Cooper was on of the few that had always excepted her for who she was.
"'Tis time you were gettin' to the chapel," she said, her voice cracking slightly.
Alanna gave Jonathan a brief hug, whispering, "I'll see you there," in his ear, and then followed Eleni out of the room.
And I promise you never
Will you hurt anymore
Jon walked down to the chapel and he took a seat beside Thayet.
She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Where've you been?" she asked.
"Visiting the bride," he told her.
"How is she?"
"Calmer than you were,"
Thayet shoved him playfully. Then soft music began to play.
I give you my word
I give you my heart
This is a battle we've won
All eyes were focused on the back of the chapel. Alanna walked slowly down the center of the room, between the rows chairs. Her even steps matched the beat of the music. All her afternoons in the town market with Mistress Cooper, practicing lady-like behavior had finally paid off. Everything about the way she stood, and walked, and moved was perfect.
Her hair was longer than it had been in a long time, dancing on her shoulders, playing the music and dim sunlight. Her white dress showed off some of her 'more feminine' features, and contrasted beautifully with the dark tan she had gotten in the desert. She was holding a bundle of vibrant purple flowers that accented her eyes and the dark red of the paint on her lips.
And with this vow
Forever has now begun
She reached George, and they held hands. The ritual of marriage was preformed in front of all their friends and important people Tortall. They promised to love one another forever, and to put each other first in their hearts.
It almost tore Jon apart to hear the words, but they had both moved on. He loved Thayet more than anything, didn't he? Until today he had been sure.
Just close your eyes
Each loving day
And know this feeling won't go away
There was dancing in a palace ball room after. It was the same room where Jon had forced 'Alan' to dance with Lady Delia just a few years ago. So much had changed since then. He hadn't fallen in love twice then. He hadn't had his life fall apart yet. He hadn't realized he couldn't have the one he first loved. He hadn't grown up. He hadn't lived.
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you
This I promise you
A dance here, a dance there. Most with Thayet, but some with others. A few duchesses, a lady or two, a princess from a near-by country. Then he found that there were none left. No woman he hadn't danced with, although there were many wanting to dance again with 'the king'. But he was feeling lonely. He needed someone who would be with him for him, and not just to say, "I danced with the King." Thayet was the only one like that . . . besides Alanna. He had hardly seen her. But, of course, it was her wedding.
Over and over I fall
When I hear you call
"Hello King," said a gentle, pleasantly familiar, voice. He groaned inwardly, thinking about having to dance with one more royal woman. As he turned around, he saw who stood there. Alanna.
"Hello the now married Sir Alanna," he said jokingly. "Care to dance?"
"Of course. I stopped turning down dances when I became a knight."
Without you in my life, baby
I just wouldn't be living at all
They whisked off onto the dance floor. Spinning around and around to the slow, steady, music, Jonathan saw no one but Alanna.
"Having fun?" he asked.
"Yes. I never like balls, but this one has been the exception. I haven't seen George since the first dance, but other than that, I guess I've had a good time."
"Had to dance with every noble man in existence, did you?"
"Seemed that way. This is one of the few dances I've really enjoyed all night."
"Me too."
And I will take
You in my arms
And hold you right where you belong
If they had not both been happily married, no doubt they would have started kissing right there on the dance floor in front of everyone. They would have mad a spectacle of themselves, before everyone who meant anything to them. Jon was already holding her far to close to be just friendly.
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you, baby
But facts remain. They were both happily married, no matter how recently, and their sense of honor was strong. Neither moved closer, although the smallest move would have had their lips meeting.
Alanna looked into Jon's clear blue eyes, as he stared into her amethyst ones, just as they had so many times before. Not another word passed between them until the song ended, and Jon whispered in her ear, "Good-bye."
Till the day my life is through
This I promise you, baby
"Not good-bye. Not even farewell, though I hope you do. There's another life, another time, another universe, and we'll be together. Never forget. Promise," she told him
"This I promise you with all my heart and soul, some day, we'll be together. I'll make sure of it." And slowly Jon let go of Alanna, kissed her hand, and let their eyes meet for the last time that night. She smiled, and walked away, each step possessing the grace only fairy tale heroines can ever have.
Just close your eyes
Each loving day
And know this feeling won't go away
"She's really something, isn't she?" Thayet asked him.
Jon jumped, then gave a weak laugh. "Yeah. But after all these years, I still can't figure out what."
Thayet giggled. "Let's dance."
Jonathan returned to the floor, this time with the other woman he loved, his wife, and his queen.
Every word I say is true
This I promise you
"Second dance today," Alanna said to George as they danced past a couple not moving at all, just staring into each other's eyes like lovesick puppies. "Sad really, a bride can only dance with the groom twice on her wedding day." She looked back at the couple again. "If we ever look like that, I hope someone slaps us."
George smiled, and kissed her. They slowly stopped dancing, and stood in the middle of the floor holding each other tightly. Alanna kissed him a way Jon had longed to be kissed by her just a few moments earlier. He watched with a pang of envy, which he did not let show.
"Someday," he muttered under his breath.
"What was that Jon?" Thayet asked.
Every word I say is true
This I promise you
I promise you
"Nothing," he told her, and lead her out onto the dance floor once again.