Road to fatherhood

by cielo2018

Shikamaru's brain is troublesome, and is having a hard time accepting his wife's pregnancy. (ShikaTema main, with mentions of NaruHina, SasuSaku, InoSai, Chorui, and all their respective progeny). Contains meddlesome friends and some angst.

Road to Fatherhood

She just stated it bluntly, like it was nothing, or more precisely, like it was something bound to happen. And truthfully he wanted to scream. How come she could just say something like that?

As if it wasn't the end of the world as he knew it.

A fucking apocalipse.

"Uh" he uttered, not knowing what to say, but knowing that he had to say something, or he would be in serious shit "Uh...congratulations". As soon as the words slipped out of his mouth he understood his mistake. He braved a glance at his wife and the utter disbelief at his statement was plain in her face.

Suddenly Shikamaru wanted to get out, he needed to smoke and cool down and analyze this whole thing properly.

Like the adult he wasn't.

He fondled his pockets searching for cigarretess and found them, but before taking one right there, he noticed he couldn't smoke in the house, not in front of her, not now and probably not for a lot of years to come.

He wasn't ready to face that particular truth as of yet, so he decided to go for the easy road.

And lie.

"Uh, I need to buy more, I'll go to the store" He looked at his wife and the absolute surprise of his whole behaviour was so evident in her face that she seemed to be truly shocked. Not wanting that to turn in one of her Tessen attacks, he went up to her, halfheartedly hugged her "I'll be right back", he said, and promptly shot out of the door of his house.

He waited until he was out of the Nara compound to actually light up a cigarette, and inhale sharply on it until his lungs burned. The chilling sound of silence started to make his head hurt. Slowly, he started to walk, always finding somehow comforting how his slow pace could bring some serenity to this mind.

Because you see, the mind of a genius doesn't work like everybody else, and isn't that the understatement of the year. But actually, it really really didn't.

A mind of a genius was for lack of a better word, complex. It normally analysed and fixed problems like everybody's else, the difference was the speed of the process, and while a normal mind would categorise about, let's say, ten different outcomes for a particular issue, the mind of a genius would come up with ten thousand, also with a speed that would normally give the brightest normal folk a headache so grand that the poor soul would faint in less than a minute.

Hence his problem.

Because, normally when one wife sprouts the three word news every normal guy wants to hear, a genius would come with ten thousand problems to said words.

"I am pregnant"

The blunt statement of Tamari resonated in his mind repeatedly, he could remember her eyes, and how she looked so vulnerable, scared and exited at the same time. Happy. And he went and pulled this number on her. Great, now he didn't only have to worry about the ten thousand scenario but also the guilt of being the crappy husband he was.

His feet apparently took him to Ichiraku's. It opened 24 hours a day now, and it seemed like a good place to stop and catch a break. He entered the store and took a seat in one of the booths, the one in the far corner were no one would see him, while telling the nice old man his order in a somewhat subdued manner.

While he waited, he started thinking why is it that Temari's pregnancy bothers him so much.

At the top of his mind, comes the issue of being twenty and being married for about a year only. A year and a month to be exact. Actually, a year and a month twenty two days and seven hours. He came aware of this last tidbit by glancing at the clock that marks 12 am. He sighed.

And it has been a fantastic year.

When he first realised that he loved her it was actually at Naruto's wedding. Sure, he knew he liked her well before that. But that deep assurance of this is it, came to him that night. He was glancing casually at some girls taking pictures while thinking how they were so loud and annoying, and thinking that Temari wasn't like that. She was mature, and beautiful and reliable and everything a girl should be. Unfortunately for the whole world's male population, girls like that don't come easily. And when Temari arrived and got clearly jealous about him supposedly checking other girls, he couldn't help to chuckle and be amazed by her innocent and simple assumption. Temari in all her wonderfulness, understood him better than anyone. Probably because she was also a genius on her own right, more on the rough side and definitely ruthless, which only made her even more perfect. But truth was, that even if she understood him better than anyone, there still were some aspects of the way his mind worked that probably no one would ever really unravel.

Her expression at his wondering eyes, made her seem so cute, that he couldn't help himself and he actually took her hand and didn't remove it for the rest of the night. She was beautiful and intelligent and he wanted her to be his. That's why Naruto's wedding has, till this day, so much of an importance in his relationship. It was the first time he realised how no one, ever, was going to be as perfect as Tamari for him.

His proposal wasn't long after that. He heard thanks to Kakashi that some elders in Suna were trying to find acceptable suitors for Temari, Kankuro and Gaara. They wanted to marry them off, sooner rather than later.

When this piece of information reached his ears, he had to admit, he gave and indignifigned yell, and promptly asked Kakashi what the hell was he talking about. He didn't process the fact that he was actually in the Hokage's office, or that there were other people in the room, such as Naruto, Tsunade and Shizune. All he cared about was the ten thousand escenarios were Temari was married to someone else, and how he will be all alone dying inside everyday by imagining some other son of a bitch touching her. Two years later, a marriage and now a very pregnant Temari that was clearly his, and still those thoughts gave him the creeps and made his insides want to crowl out of his skin.

Kakashi had some mercy on his soul, god bless him, and told him the whole thing. Apparently the Kazekage had shared this information with him last they saw each other. Shikamaru asked in a surprised voice if the elders didn't know that he was dating Temari, with what right were they making that decision? At which statement Kakashi promptly answered that Shikamaru hadn't made a formal proposal, so in the eyes of the world she was as single as a year ago.

Shikamaru wanted to puke. But then, in a truly manifestation of his genius, he started to work on said proposal, he would be damn if he allowed her to marry anyone else that wasn't him.

It took him a year, and a lot of grovelling but when he finally said I do, he truly was the happiest man on earth.

Or so he thought until they spend their first night together, and man, wasn't that enlightening. Because, never in all of his genius, he would've thought that something so basic and animal could be that good.

Being with Tamari turned his so called genius into putty, and he normally wouldn't catch a proper thought well after he finished. Well he did use his genius and his quick study capabilities to give her mind blowing orgasms. Since that very first time together, keeping her satisfied was the very only goal his lazy self truly had.

He sighed. He glanced at the table he was sitting at, noticing that, without him realising it, the food was already in the table. The ramen getting colder and colder and the bottle of sake getting emptier and emptier.

He sighed once more and rested is head in his hand. He lighted up another cigarette and his mind continued his rambling.

Pregnant...

How...

Just How...

How in the world did it even happend?

And yes, thank you, the mechanics were quite clear, but as far as he could tell they had been very careful, always using protection. He couldn't remember a time were he had actually being with his wife without a condom.

Fucking wonderful.

All that care, for the damn things to fail him.

One year, only one year he had had her. And now, he was loosing her.

It wasn't fair.

The door of the ramen shop suddenly opened and a loud happy yell reached his ears.

"Ten orders of Ramen, please!" Naruto said, and Ichiraku happily complied. Shikamaru prayed to all that was holy that Naruto didn't see him. But well this day, was bound to be the worst day of his life, as it has proven so far, "Shikamaru! Shikamaru! Is that you!?"

And people wondered why Shikamaru found people annoying really.

He cursed under his breath but politely replied "Hello Naruto"

"Whatcha doing here man?" Naruto asked him and promptly proceded to seat in front of him in the booth. Wasn't the point of seating this far to be anonymous? Shikamaru asked himself.

"Uh. Went for a walk" He glanced at the window hoping his attitude would dissuade Naruto to leave him alone. No such luck.

"What has you in this mood Shikamaru?" He looked at Naruto, and saw his face completely serious, apparently his own vibe was giving away more that what he was expecting. Fucking Perfect.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, trying once again to pry Naruto's questions out of him.

"Oh! Hinata's got a craving for ramen" He answered happily, giving one of his goofy smiles "You know how it is" he said, and Shikamaru wanted to scream. No, he didn't know how it was, but apparently he was going to find out. Soon.

"I am pregnant"

Temari's voice once again assaulted him and he wanted to yell again. He turned off his cigarette and grabbed another. With half a mind, he realized he had smoked ten cigarettes in less than an hour. He felt horrible, inside and out. Which might have been pretty obvious since Naruto all serious business asked in a voice that Shikamaru was starting to categorise as his Hokage voice,

"What's wrong Shikamaru?" And he was so serious and upfront about it, that even if he wasn't the Hokage yet, the command almost made him talk.

Almost.

"Did you have a fight with Temari?" Naruto suddenly asked. He looked at him and he was so worried that Shikamaru entertained the thought of telling him. But he couldn't right? After all, Naruto was his friend but not his best friend. He should be talking about this with Choji and maybe Ino. Fuck. Thinking about those two made him feel even worse. They were going to kill him, he was sure of it.

He felt a hand waving in front of his face, trying to make him come back from his thoughts.

"No, of course not" He answered. And it was the truth. Temari and he, never fought. They bickered and bantered and maybe he received some punches here and there, but they were always about stupid mundane things. He didn't remember, not even once, a time were he and Temari had a serious fight.

They were made for each other, there really wasn't anything to fight about. And when they discovered the wonders of sex, every time they were annoyed with each other they blowed some steam under the sheets. Or the bathroom. Or the Kitchen's counter. Or the couch. Or any surface he managed to reach before that overwhelming need to have her got him.

No wonder she got pregnant.

Damn it!

He sighed for the hundred time, and dared a glance at Naruto, who was looking more and more preoccupied by the minute. He rested his head in his hand once more and closed his eyes. When he opened them again, he saw Naruto texting in the phone. Perfect. He was probably telling Hinnatta he was going to be late because he had encountered a troubled Shikamaru. And wasn't that the cherry at the top of a cake of a perfect day? He was now sure, Naruto would nag him until he told what the hell was wrong with him.

And what the hell was wrong with him anyways?

It was just a pregnancy, it wasn't like anyone died right?

Fuck, it was just that. The more he thought about it, the more he hated it. He didn't want kids. He wanted Tamari for himself, and only himself. He knew how women were when they had kids. All they cared about was them, and their husbands be damned.

He gulped more sake.

It wasn't like he could run away anyways. Gaara would follow him to the end of the world to bring his merry ass back, just to give Temari the pleasure of killing him in person. Probably, they would lock him in Kankuro's room full of those creepy puppets, just to make his final hours more awful.

And who was he kidding? Even if he felt like running to the North Pole, at the end of the day he would come back, because nothing was worth a day without his wife in his arms. Not even a snotty brat.

FUCK!

He was getting more upset by the minute.

He heard the bell of the shop ring again, he didn't pay attention and looked through the window. No clouds. Obviously. It was one in the frigging morning. The stars were nice though.

When he came about his surroundings anew, he saw Naruto and Sakura chatting quietly in front of him. Where in the world did she come from?

"What are you doing here?" He asked, because really, didn't these people realize he wanted to be left alone?

"Late night shift in the hospital. I am taking a break because I was starving" Sakura stated, and he suddenly noticed that Naruto was also eating ramen. Quite loudly and with no manners whatsoever. He didn't understand how someone as sweet, pure and well mannered as Hinnatta had given this baboon the time of the day. He was way out of her league.

Shikamaru was also way out of Temari's league and nevertheless she chose him, didn't she? She chose his lazy ass to spend the rest of her life with, and he paid her with a congratulations.

Some genius he was.

He took the bottle of sake trying to refill his glass, just to discover it was empty, he asked for another one, all the while ignoring the two in front of him giving him calculating looks.

"So she told you uh?" Sakura asked him and he instantly wanted to die. Of course she knew. She was a fucking nin medic. Naruto had a perplexed look in his face, that was reassuring.

He also noticed that Naruto was dying of curiosity, he may as well tell the news, they would spread like wildfire in some days anyways.

"Temari's pregnant" He said to Naruto's inquiring eyes, and saw him getting surprised first, only to frown just after. As if he didn't understand why this news was so upsetting for Shikamaru. Because a baby was fucking wonderful wasn't it? He thought bitterly.

"Is it because of the Ino/Shika/Cho thing?" Sakura enquired, and Shikamaru looked at her shocked, sometimes it did surprised him when an average brain came to an enlightening conclusion.

"Not the top of my worries, but concerning anyways, yes" he answered.

"Man, you should be happy about this, this is great news!" Naruto excitedly said "I bet Ino and Choji would be on board anyways, don't worry"

"As I said..." He started glaring at Naruto "Not my main concern"

They looked at him, clearly breaking their brains trying to figure out why was he so fucking depressed. And suddenly he really wanted to talk with Choji. He understood him, he was the best of friends, also, just two months into his new married life that Shikamaru was about to ruin forever. Some friend he was.

"Shikamaru, what is it then? We are your friends, you can trust us with anything, if you need anything I can help with, I will be there for you. You are a very precious friend to me and I hate to see you this way. I mean, you cannot see yourself obviously. But you are smoking and drinking non stop for something that should have you screaming from the rooftop from happiness" Naruto blurted with a serious face and Shikamaru wanted to bolt once again.

"It doesn't really matter how he feels, what's important is that you are here wallowing in whatever your brain has come up with, while your wife is probably in tears in your house because you left her there, some man you are." Sakura annoyedly pointed out, and she looked like she was going to punch him.

They just didn't understand.

"Whatever, you wouldn't understand anyway" Shikamaru bluntly stated, turned off his cigarette, emptied his second bottle of sake and stood up. "Later" he said with a wave, and left Naruto and Sakura there, gapping at him. He did trust they wouldn't go around telling everybody how fucking upset he was of having his wife become pregnant. He truly could't deal with people right now.

He continued walking not really seeing where he was going. His feet took him to his house. They always did that.

Before he married they would take him to the gates of Konoha, as if waiting for some miraculous appearance of Tamari. His body always went were she was, like magnet. It would follow her wherever she was, point in the direction of Sunagakure without a second thought. Like gravity.

Temari was gravity.

A force of nature that would keep him grounded and attached to this world.

Your wife is probably in tears in your house because you left her there.

That was what Sakura had said, wasn't it? As if. Temari didn't cry. She was fortitude personified, she wasn't the type of woman that would fall into tears for anything. She was strong, damn, she was so strong. Somedays he wondered how in the hell did he landed such a rare treasure.

He entered his house, took off his shoes and glanced at the clock in the living room. It was 3am. He quietly walked to his bedroom to find Temari silently asleep. He grabbed some underwear and went to the bathroom, not the one in the master bedroom but the other one in the house so as to not wake her. He showered throughly since he knew she hated the smell of alcohol and cigarette, he washed his teeth and clawed only in his boxers finally made it to his and Temari's bed.

He sat and with astonishment, he saw his wife surrounded by used napkins, as if she had been blowing her nose in them. That surprised him and he decided to take a closer inspection. He examined her more closely and noticed the path of dried tears in her face. Some still lingering in her eyelashes.

He closed his eyes and pure unadulterated shame washed over him. Sighing resignedly, he lifted the covers and got himself inside. He hugged his wife tightly and also felt like crying.

He decided right then and there, that his feelings didn't matter.

He was going to suck it up, and pretend he was okay with this pregnancy thing for his wife's sake. He would be damn, if he was the one to bring tears to his wife beautiful eyes.

That was good, that was a good plan right? He could pretend. How hard could it be anyways?

With that last train of thought, his tiredness won and he finally fell asleep.

---

It turns out maintaining a facade with someone that knows you as well as the palm of her hand it isn't as easy as he predicted to be.

The problem was, that Temari knew he was very unhappy with this news, and apparently the rest of his friends and probably half of the town as well. It started with Ino and Choji promptly knocking on his office door and ushering him to lunch. There they very calmly told him that he shouldn't worry about it, that they have talked it through with their respective partners and they were already in the baby making process.

Ugh.

And wasn't it disgusting when you combined the thought of your friends, who might as well be your heart siblings, and sex? It was for him at least.

Then they happily proceeded to tell him he should be very happy now, that they were on board, so he could stop with the moping.

Shikamaru, politely and somehow coldly told them thank you, stood up and left the restaurant they were in. Leaving them stunned in silence screaming at him to come back.

The hell he would come back, they were actually approving of this insanity, of having some brat stealing the only thing that was truly his. He hated the snotty brat. He didn't want him to be inside his wife. He was the only one allowed to be inside her. He was the only one she should love the most no matter what. Now there was some usurper growing inside his beautiful wife threatening everything he held most dear and they wanted him to be fucking happy about it?

The fuck he was.

The second assault he suffered was from Naruto, Hinata and Sakura. They cornered him in his office, Sakura promptly showing a bunch of brochures about pregnancy and babling on and on and on about his new duties and how he should properly take care about a pregnant woman. Naruto probably thinking he was very helpful told him about the wonders of hormones horniness and that was when Shikamaru really wanted to throw up. Because the image of Hinata and supposedly dickless, according to Sai, going at it wasn't his cup of tea in the least.

Finally to make matters worse, Hinata, had the audacity of asking him how the baby was. And that was when he registered that he had absolutely no idea. He had been avoiding having the baby talk with his wife, because if there was something Temari knew how to do was to crack him. And he really didn't want her to know the monster she had married.

Because yes, he was aware, his brain was helpful like that, specially in telling him quite precisely how much of a douchbag he was.

It was just...he hated the idea of sharing her. He didn't want to. He had planned for a kid in some years, when this fire and need for her wasn't this fierce.

Shikamaru was a bright kid... man... well...something in the middle. And he knew that the bottom of the problem was his love for Temari. It had reached such depth that now it seemed impossible for him to live without her or to live with half of her. The issue was that kids needed attention. Tones of it. And his very calculating brain was telling him that his days of enjoying her fully were numbered.

No more fucking in every surface available.

No more scalp massages when they went cloud watching.

No more sleep.

No more dates.

No more freedom.

It was as if his life really was ending.

And the snotty brat was taking away the best thing that had ever happened to him.

He wished they had married sooner, maybe he wouldn't feel so bad about this whole ordeal if he had had more time with her. Who was he kidding? No amount of years were going to make his need for his wife completely satisfied. He was always going to hate the idea of a kid. He just thought he was going to have more time to fully make his mind about it.

He realized he had been ten minutes without speaking to Naruto, Sakura and Hinata. He decided he didn't have time for this, so he politely told them that this was a workplace and bringing up such personal matters was completely out of line, and would they please vacate his office. They gapped at him.

He was trully getting tired of watching his friends gapping at him. He knew he was being unreasonable but why couldn't they just leave him the hell alone?

Not such luck.

Kakashi was the next one to corner him, asking him if he was upset because he was working too much and he wasn't going to be able to care for his wife and baby properly. Shikamaru was so dumbfound that the news had travelled to the damn Hokage for fucks sake, to actually answer. To which Kakashi, told him that from now on, he was to work only from Monday to Friday from 8am to 8pm and Saturdays from 8am to 1pm. Then he dismissed him from the office bringing Shikamaru a whole new set of problems, since he was actually using work to go home as late as possible.

Now, to compensate his free time, he would star watch in the Nara forest until he was absolutely certain his wife was asleep. He would go back home, take a shower, sleep and in the mornings talk with his wife about silly unimportant things or work, make and have breakfast and go back again to work. Saturdays and Sundays, were now a pain, since cloud watching on the hard soil had a limited number of hours until his back ache like hell.

It was a fucking nightmare.

By the second week of this behaviour, which apparently was very uncalled for according to half the fucking town. The help for his friends, much to Shikamaru's chagrin, came in the form of his in laws.

Yep.

He was cloud watching in the Nara forest hoping to be undisturbed, when he suddenly felt the presence of Gaara and Kankuro. He couldn't really believe his eyes when they approached him, like these lands weren't absolutely forbidden to anyone that wasn't a Nara. Hidan didn't really count, since he was chopped in pices in different parts of the forest. Shikamaru was the one gaping now.

"How in the world are you allowed in here?" He asked in bewilderment, because really, he was the head of the fucking Naras, this was outrageous.

His brothers, proceded to tell him, that they had being allowed there by Yoshino San as familiar proxies. Which had Nakamaru spluttering in disbelief as his own mother, hell, his own clan, allowing something like this to happen. Not even the Akamichis and Yamanakas were allowed there, it must have been the first time in centuries someone not of Nara blood or marriage to set a foot in there.

They ignored him as predicted and proceded to ask him if he was upset because the baby was of Kazekage's blood meaning a rightful prince or princess and the first in line of succession after Gaara.

He really wanted to scream. What was it with all these people bothering him about things he already knew but they weren't the real reason of his fucking depression.

Gauging his expression, Gaara told him not to worry, that they have talked it through with Kankuro, and they were now actively trying to find wives to procreate. And wasn't Gaara a delight when it came to expressing the birds and the bees?

Risking his own neck, and possibly the possibility of any further progeny, he told them as the head of the Naras that he was revoking whatever permission Yoshino gave, and told them she didn't have authorisation to do something like that, and that they would please vacate the forest if they didn't want an international invasion accusation on their hands.

They gapped at him.

Shikamaru was really annoyed at that expression.

Recalling all the previous interactions, meaning, all the medling people in his life, he realised that they were all actually bringing solutions to him. He asked himself if he should act this way more often, just so people would actually solve their own problems, instead of asking him to fix everything.

Finally the fifth person to approach him was predictably his mother. He wondered what took her so long. He was launching near a tree when a shadow blocked his view, that's when he saw her. This was going to be a drag.

"Ok, spill it out, what is it really about?" Yoshino asked him. He was truly pissed by now. He didn't appreciate the incapability of the people in his life to le him be on his merry way. It was like he wasn't allowed a fucking minute for himself. Damn them all.

"What do you want mother?"

"Is that the way to speak to your mother?"

He didn't answered, he figured that being as upset he was, talking would end up in him saying too much.

"I didn't raise you to be this much of a coward. What the hell is wrong with you?"

That had Shikamaru seething. How dare she, how dare she say he was a coward? He was still there wasn't he? He had lived through wars, battles and he still kissed his wife every fucking morning to go to work, for her, and now also por the snotty brat and to provide for them. He hadn't run away from his responsibilities. He wasn't emotionally invested, but he was no coward. He was still fucking doing everything he was supposed to. Just because he wasn't screaming in joy didn't mean he was running away.

He was fucking processing.

Why couldn't they give him a fucking break!?

"How dare you telling me that! I am doing everything I am supposed to, including working my ass off to provide for them. Don't you dare disrespecting me this way, don't forget I am the head of this clan alright. Know your limits!"

After his diatribe, he feared he was truly going to die. The face of his mother was beyond description, the fury in her was so grand, that Shikamaru involuntarily took a step back.

Some clan head he was, afraid of his own mother.

Then quickly as the fierce rage came to her, the fight left her in a resigned manner, then more calmly she asked him.

"What is going on with you son? Please, we need to know. Everybody is worrying sick about you, nobody understands a thing and, even if she doesn't want to show it, Temari is very sad. I beg you. What is going on?"

The name of his wife angered him further, specially knowing that she was suffering because of him. Clearly his plan of pretending wasn't going too well. But he thought that he only needed to pretend in front of her, not to everybody. Not that he did a good job in any of those fronts.

"You want to know what's wrong?" He asked angrily "This is what is wrong" he answered and pointed at each other in a manner of a example "Why is everybody meddling in my life like this, don't I deserve to catch a breath? And you coming here accusing me of being a coward when I am doing every..."

"You are not doing everything!" His mother interrupted him "you are neglecting your wife! Just because you are physically here and providing financially it doesn't mean that you are doing everything you should be doing."

"What in the world are you talking about? I talk to her, I kiss her every day, I have even given her foot massages, I have cooked! In which way I am neglecting her!?" Shikamaru asked outraged. Because actually, he was there for her. Totally avoiding the baby talk, sure he admitted that, but he did everything like almost everyday before this nightmare started. He did avoid her at nights though, and just because he knew she would crack his charade then.

"Ok, you are not neglecting your wife, I apologise, you are also not a coward. I am sorry" Shikamaru was actually startled when hearing that, it was the first time he heard Yoshino Nara apologising for anything. "You are neglecting your baby"

Shikamaru closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. That part was one hundred percent true, and so what? He loved his wife, he didn't want anything to do with the snotty brat, what's more he was going to avoid the issue for as long as he could.

"Please son, talk to me" Yoshino begged with such force, such mother force that he couldn't help but cave in.

"You know, this is actually the very problem itself ain't it? I don't recall, not even once, a time were you didn't ignore father in favor of me. Because after all, you love me don't you? You love more than anyone else in the world. No one steps up in the middle of that, am I right?" He said sardocanily, and looked at his mother straight in the eyes. Yoshino had her eyes wide open and was gulping forcibly.

After that he was drained. He turned around lighted up a cigarette and went home. Early. Fuck. He heard his mother at his back screaming at him to please come back, but he didn't have intentions of doing so. Seeing her, was the very image of what awaited him, and he was too depressed to deal with it now. Or ever.

When he reached his house he saw his wife preparing dinner. He entered the kitchen and hugged her, kissing her in the forehead in the process. Temari looked at him with those beautiful eyes and tightened her embrace.

Shikamaru felt his heart breaking.

God, this was awful.

His mind didn't leave him alone, not even for one bit. It was all day and half the night rambling about the horrible ten thousand escenarios that awaited him once the snotty brat made his merry appearance in the world. Shattering his life in pieces in the process.

He finished eating his dinner and realized that he had been spacing out the whole time. He dared a look at his wife who was looking at him. She probably knew or half knew what was this all about. The problem was that she didn't know how to adress the issue. After all, none of them thought of having a problem like this one when they got married.

Sure, they had talked kids, but they were such an abstract notion, that Shikamaru really didn't think he thought it through. Very surprising considering that he always thought everything through. But as he stated earlier, his mind truly was putty when he was near her. So when the topic of babies came, he was so desperate to have her and feel her on their wedding night, that the only thought of babies that crossed his mind was how to avoid them.

His wife tonight was looking beautiful as always. She had a purple kimono that was really loose and short and left her long legs to display. She truly was any man's fantasy, and he wanted her so damn much that his mouth got dry just by looking at her legs. She threw a knowing smile at him and proceded to clean the table and told him to go shower.

Shikamaru not thinking twice escaped to the bathroom, where he tried to calm his breathing. This is why he was avoiding coming home at night so early. In their marriage routine, the only time they had to actually be intimate with each other was at nights. During the morning of the afternoons it was unlikely. Mornings because of the rush to get to work, and in the afternoon because he was at work.

How many days since he hadn't made love to her?

Two weeks.

Two weeks, five days and twelve hours or so, more precisely. Fuck his brain.

Which was a record come to think of it. The thing was, that since they got married they were like bunnies, almost going at it every day. He had to be truly dead to not want to make love to her.

Hence the problem.

He knew he was going to crack if they were together, there was this moment in the heist of it, were he knew she was going to get her answers.

Sometimes he hated how weak he was to her.

He didn't want her to know, because then she would realize that she married a selfish unworthy bastard that was, after all, a kid. An inmature kid, that didn't want to share his wife with anyone.

Because let's be honest here, it's not like she didn't dedicate time to her brothers and friends, and didn't have freedom, on the contrary, she did. And she was so independent that he loved that about her. But this was different, this baby was going to be her outmost priority from now on, leaving Shikamaru in the shadow of a life he didn't have enough time to enjoy.

He truly was a selfish bastard.

He left the bathroom and sighing resignedly went to his bedroom. His wife was already there, and damn, what a sight she was. All perfect curves and pale skin. Her hair loose and her eyes looking at him, so bright green and exotic.

Naked.

His breath caught and he felt his body moving. That was her power. Like a magnet, like gravity itself, pulling at him inevitably, since day one.

He reached the bed and with a shaking hand he caressed her face. He really wanted to but at the same time he didn't want to. Such was his turmoil that Temari caught on fast, his princess was very bright alright, and decided to take matters on her own hands and don't give him the opportunity to back out.

As if.

He just wasn't strong enough.

You don't really say no to a woman like Temari.

That was just imposible. Because you see, Temari was fire itself. Everything she did, she did it with such passion and intensity, that it was unthinkable for a poor in love soul like his to actually do anything but surrender. And so, she crushed her mouth against his in such a possessive way that Shikamaru felt his already hard cock swell in his boxers. She proceded to straddle him and sat in his lap, rubbing herself on his hard on. They both moaned and she took the oportunity to assault his mouth with her tongue, making a dance they knew well and drove them to the edge. They were so worked up just by that, that it was clearly not going to last long, they had missed each other too much. Two weeks was too long and they both knew it.

His hands wondered south reaching her breasts. He pinched the nipples and attacked her neck when she took a breath from the ravishing kiss to moan. He kept kissing and bitting the pulse of her neck, just the way she liked it, while his hand kept going down until they reached her most intimate area. She was so fucking wet that Shikamaru felt his cock jump, ordering him to move and to get there right fucking now.

He lifted her up changing the position so now he was on top of her. Temari forcibly took his boxers off by shoving them down his hips in a desperate manner that had Shikamaru trembling on top of her. Then she put her arms around his neck, opened her legs invitingly and looked at him.

God, Shikamaru wasn't strong enough to deny her much longer. He crushed her mouth against her and shoved his cock inside in one swift move. Tamari's moans got lost in Shikamaru's kisses while he kept penetrating her. Hard and Deep. Relentlessly. It wasn't fast, but it was so hard and so deep that left them breathless, to the point they just couldn't kiss anymore, and had to breathe and growl or scream instead.

Fuck it was so good.

It was always so damn good.

How long would it last if she was pregnant? The thought crossed his mind but his body had a will on his own, and it kept making love to her, in a merciless pace that had both reaching their peaks with gutural growls.

That was exactly the moment Shikamaru wanted to avoid. That perfect moment where he was so deep inside her that all he wanted to do was to bury himself and empty his seed deep inside her.

Man, wasn't that what brought him to the current situation?

He half consciously recognised that this particular endeavour of theirs had felt a tad different and certainly out of this world, and then it sank on him that it was the first time he had made love to his wife without a condom. It wasn't any point of them now was it?

He looked at his wife, while the after shakes of their orgasms made them tremble in each others arms. And when she looked at him. He felt it. Cracking his will.

The problem of the thing his prodigious mind told him, were Temari's eyes. They were so exotic and beautiful and once you got to know her, they contained everything she didn't say. Temari wasn't a woman who used pointless words. She didn't beat around the bush nor wasted time with words that didn't get to the heart of things. He loved that about her. Then you also had a lot of the things she wouldn't say because she didn't see the point, or because she was shy, or afraid. Her eyes, did the job her mouth didn't, and they were amazing.

Sometimes, Shikamaru truly felt a slave of those eyes, he could be lost in them, more so than his beloved clouds. And wasn't that something?

Temari looked at him, inquiring, wanting to know, wanting her answer. And he tried, he truly tried, to come up with ten thousand different excuses but in the end he couldn't really lie to those eyes. He felt his own sting a little when he finally uttered subduedly "I don't want to lose you...us"

Temari's eyes, widened and her breath caught. She looked at him with profound bewilderment and then she understood. And that look...

Shikamaru couldn't stand.

He untangled himself from her, he kissed her in the forehead, Temari spluttered confused at his sudden retreat, but he really couldn't see the disappointment in his wife's eyes, and if he stayed one second more there, she was really going to have a reason to call him crybaby.

He entered the bathroom, and turn on the shower. He got inside and felt himself relax a little bit with the water. But there still was this feeling in the pit of his stomach, this unrelenting fear that didn't leave him alone since he first knew about the pregnancy.

His tears got lost with the pouring water of the shower. He was so distracted wallowing in his own self pity that he didn't notice he wasn't alone. A pair of strong feminine arms embraced him from behind holding him tightly. He felt Temari kiss his wet back and with a firmness in her voice that left no space for doubts she stated "Never" while peppering his back with kisses "Never, you hear me?" She affirmed with confidence.

Shikamaru lifted his arms back, and embraced her. Still facing the wall and the pouring water, not daring to look at her.

"You can't promise that" he answered, and it was as sincere as her own words.

Wasn't it a curse sometimes? When someone understood you, really understood you, better than anyone?

Now the truth of his true feelings were out, and there wasn't anything she could do about it.

---

He remembered Temari telling him, after the whole Gengo ordeal, that anytime he lost himself she was going to punch him as many times were needed until he reacted. Surprisingly enough, this time around she didn't. Mainly because she knew that this situation wasn't going to fix itself like that. He needed to fix it on his own.

Two months passed and Temari reached her fifth month into the pregnancy.

During those months, people started to tiptoe around the subject of the imminent snotty brat arrival. So they just asked him how Temari was, and that question he could answer easily. He loved his wife and cared for her deeply. It was that simple.

So he cared about her, pampered her, took her to Sakura's appointments and even went with her to see the snotty brat getting its first picture. When he first looked at the ecosonogram he marvelled at how something so little and intangible could make his life so troublesome and plain difficult. Mostly he just kept carrying on preoccupying himself about Temari and Temari only.

The baby talk was a big no no in any conversation he was involved. Thankfully, everybody respected his wishes, probably because he showed love for his wife, ask the right questions about her health and treated her like the princess she really was, as he always had.

His genius did come handy once in a while. Besides loving Temari was as easy as breathing so it truly wasn't troublesome for him. It was troublesome to avoid the damn baby talk like the plague though.

He just refused to talk, think or even entertain any thoughts concerning the parasite that was ruining his life. He decided he was going to enjoy the time he had left with her as much as he could. He was at home all he could, took her to dates, made love to her wherever he could and it was fantastic. It was as if the snotty brat wasn't even there.

Except...now it was making its presence known. It would kick her belly and his wife would yelp and then smile. That smile that was only for him before, was now for the brat also. He absolutely hated it. Specially when, after smiling at it, she would turn and smile at Shikamaru and urge him to feel the brat too. With trembling hands and a halfhearted smile he usually complied. Just to not make her unhappy, not because he cared about the baby at all. Unsurprisingly, the baby didn't kick his hand through her belly, not even once. It was as if it hated Shikamaru already. Ugh two can play that game.

She also started to glow, in a way that made her even more beautiful of how she already was. Everybody commented her on how pretty she was, and that she had that special glow. To which Temari would smile. She smiled a lot these days. Not because of him obviously, or at least not only because of him.

So that's how it starts uh?

The wake up call to his self acknowledged rotten attitude came when his wife was almost six months pregnant. They were sleeping late into the night and he was embracing Temari like always. He would put his right arm around her middle and hug her tightly through the night. This particular night something woke him though.

He felt his hand being pushed by something through his wife belly. And finally... finally, he realised que couldn't keep up with the denial. The snotty brat was there to stay and there was nothing he could do about it. He sighed and tried to think in a million strategies were he could make this thing work. At least to not lose his wife, because Temari was Temari and she was clearly giving him time to get used to the baby, but she wasn't going to put up with his attitude for the rest of her life. Shikamaru was pretty sure that at some point it would stint their love to a point of no repair. She wasn't going to stand him not loving her baby. He knew that much already. His very helpful brain provided such scenario, in which the snotty brat took Temari with him to fucking Suna to be the next Kazekage.

Shikamaru really hated his brain sometimes.

At least that scenario was better than the expanded version of it, where she leaves him, remarries and has someone else's baby. Shikamaru didn't like the parasite in his wife but at least it was his parasite, and he would be damn before he lets another man take what's his. Snotty brat included.

Plus, it could certainly happen. Temari was beautiful, sexy, with royal blood and with a personality that had most men drooling. Even now pregnant as she was, he could see the looks some men gave her. It happened before they were even a couple and it bothered him then. Now he absolutely hated it.

Yep, Temari was the type of woman that needed to be cherished and demanded such thing from her partner. Nowadays, such cherishing included the snotty brat in her equation. If he ever were to fail in that front, she would kick his ass and go on about her life. To make a new life for herself without him and she would include the snotty brat in that backup plan. Suitors would never fail to crawl under the rocks, waiting for him to make a mistake. Like the one he was making right now...In the meantime, he would die alone because if he was honest with himself, he didn't even recall so much as looking in other woman's direction. Not even when he was single. It had always been her, and it will be like that until he left this world for sure.

Even so, with all this mess, he didn't understand how come he hadn't received a Tessen attack lately. She must love him more than he thought for her to be so patient. And he had never really seen his wife being particularly patient. With anyone.

He was really stretching the lines thin here.

He sighed dejectedly and felt another kick, and then another. What surprised him about that is how his wife kept sleeping. He wondered how could she sleep with that ruckus inside her.

"Temari...Temari...wake up...don't you feel that?" He asked seriously curious. His wife, however didn't answer. When he touched her face, he noticed perspiration in her forehead, and that's when he started to worry.

He threw the covers off himself to better see his wife. After doing that, he saw some dampness on the sheets that were very dark. He ran to the light switch and when the bedroom was fully illuminated he saw his wife resting in a pool of blood.

Saying he panicked is putting it out mildly.

He ran to her and tried to wake her, to no avail. He covered her in blankets and carried her out of the house. Some of his clansmen were already out having heard his yelling. He ran with her to the hospital not caring about anyone he saw. He ran like his life depended on it, and it truly was, because there was no life without Temari. That was much of a truth as the sky is blue.

When he reached the hospital screaming at the top of his lungs for help. He was informed that neither Sakura nor Tsunade where there. He left Temari in what he hoped were the capable hands of a nurse nin and ran barefoot as he was, half naked only clad in his pyjama pants to find them. He went to Sakura's house first, and if he wasn't panicking out of his mind he would've been surprised at seeing a half naked Sasuke opening the door at his insistent loud knocks.

"What the fuck you think you are doing?" Sasuke asked him, and Shikamaru didn't feel like dealing with the traitorous mother fucker right now. Or with anyone that wasn't his wife's medics for that matter.

"I don't have time for this" He pushed Sasuke out of the way and started to scream Sakura's name. He went as far as climbing the stairs to find the bedroom were Sakura was, she screamed at him to get the hell out when he entered with Sasuke nowhere in sight.

"What are you doing!? Get out! Get out! Get out!" Sakura yelled at him, covering herself with her blankets, Shikamaru in his crazed estate, came to be aware of the fact that she was actually naked under the blankets. Truthfully, he couldn't care less, his eyes wondered around the room until he saw a kimono. He shoved it at her unceremoniously and only said one word.

"Temari"

Luckily it was enough to get her moving, afterwards he went downstairs and ran looking now for Tsunade, seeing Sasuke was trapped in a shadow jutsu he didn't even remember doing.

He knew to search for Tsunade in a bar, she was out of her mind drunk, but he grabbed her and told her in no nice words to use her healing jutsu to get sober and come to the hospital immediately. He used the firm tone of voice he used at work to make people do what he needed. And fortunately she did.

Both Sakura and Tsunade complied so willingly probably because of how crazy he must have looked. He knew that. But for the life of him, if they didn't save his wife there was going to be hell to pay, because at least one of them should have taken the night shift at the hospital, and he was going to destroy their careers if they didn't get to work. Like yesterday. One of them fucking and the other drinking, he was not going to let that go.

The following hours were, truth to be told, a blur in Shikamaru's mind.

He knew that there were people around him, asking him stuff but he was in a catatonic estate. His mind wasn't really working. The only thing that was clear to him was that he was going to die if he lost Temari.

There was this horrible ache in his chest that barely allowed him to breath. He felt numb and a blind chilling sound in his ears. At some point someone gave him something. Or more precisely, they forcefully grabbed his head back, shoved some pills and water in his throat and proceded to pat him uncermonously on his back when he coughed.

He felt kind of funny after that. Like he was walking on cotton. Like his head was cotton. And his body was cotton. He was cotton.

When he became more focused, there was someone in front of him.

"Come with me" Tsunade said, and without thinking he followed. They reached a door, she opened it and allowed him in. She pointed at the chair in front of her desk urging him to take a seat. When some minutes of silence passed Tsunade asked him "Are you alright?"

Shikamaru laughed. That are you fucking kidding me? Kind of laugh.

"She is going to be alright" He jerked his head up at that. And he felt the knot in his throat somehow reduce its size.

"And the..." He couldn't bring himself to ask about the baby. He realized with surprise that the thought of also losing the baby was crushing. Maybe not totally because he truly cared but because he knew Temari would be devastated. And that's a pain he didn't want her to go through. Ever. His heart beat speeded up waiting for her answer. Tsunade just seated there gauging his question, looking at him and analysing his actions.

"There was a complication. The baby's chacra is not compatible with hers, probably because she has a wind chakra, while yours is a shadow one, the baby is a Nara through and through. He will be a shadow jutsu ninja. It was a close call though, for both of them" she answered and he felt the air he didn't know he was catching leave him at once.

A sense of profound relief possessed him. They were ok. He repeated that over and over again, until his brain felt more like itself not so full of cotton.

"Can I see her?" He asked, because he truly just wanted to see her, and cry his relief in peace. To feel her heartbeat and don't leave her out of his sight again. He wasn't even going to sleep anymore. He should've realised sooner what was happening. If it wasn't for those kicks he would've kept sleeping like the lazy ass he was, and his wife would be dead by now.

With a sense of total bewilderment, he realized that his unborn son had saved his mother's life, with whatever little strength he had, he had pushed through into his hand, just to tell his father that it and his mother needed help.

His unborn son.

His son.

He was going to be a father.

The numbness and the headache came to him at full force once again. Making his heart ache and pound painfully fast in his ribcage. Not even once since the fatidic day where Temari told him she was pregnant did he think of the baby as his son.

It was it, the parasite, the snotty brat, the usurper, it was hers...but never, not even once, did he fully comprehend that it was his baby too. A part of him and Temari. Of both.

His head was killing him, intuitively Tsunade touched his forehead with strong yet gentle fingers, using some healing jutsu, and he suddenly felt clearer and without the pain. Tsunade closed her eyes, sighed, and Shikamaru knew he was going to get lectured.

Troublesome.

"Shikamaru, I am going to talk, and you are not going to interrupt, nor you are going to find the one million meanings of what I am about to say, like your mind normally does." She paused for effect "You are the most brilliant man that I have ever met. I have seen you grow up since you were a little gennin until what you are today. Your future is bright and promising. You have a beautiful wife, a kid on the way, family and amazing friends that care deeply for you. You have nevertheless, make all of them suffer these last few months with your attitude. You have alienated yourself instead of talking and getting help" Shikamaru lifted his head wanting to interrupt her and tell her that he certainly didn't need any help with his baby problem, because he knew what she was talking about alright, he was everything but stupid. Tsunade raised her hand warning him off and that made him close his mouth "You are not alone. What you are feeling, is very common and a lot of men go through it, in different degrees of course, yours has been one of the worse cases I have ever seen, but it is not abnormal, you are not a monster for feeling the way you feel about your baby and it certainly doesn't mean you cannot talk about it because you think people will judge you for it."

Shikamaru let it sank in, he dropped his head in his hands defeated and tried in vain to make the lump in his throat go away. This was probably the worse night of his life.

"The problem as I see it" Tsunade continued "Is your own brilliance, your mind goes to a speed that I cannot fully imagine, bringing you a whole set of problems people normally don't worry about, making you more and more anxious about the whole thing when it really is the most simple thing in the world. You are going to be a father, and he will need you and love you and cherish you, the same way you did your own father. What would you think you would do if you knew Shikaku had the same feelings for you as you have for your baby?" Shikamaru's head snap up and looked at her incredulously. That was a low blow. Absolutely truthful and logical but brutal nevertheless. "Or if you knew that Asuma felt like that for Mirai?" Okay, now he was feeling like the worst scum in the face of the earth "The more intelligent you are, the more socially awkward, that's a universal truth. Meaning that sometimes you are trapped into your own head. So much so, that you don't know how to deal with your feelings in a healthy way because your mind gets in the way. Your father was a little depressed when Yoshino became pregnant, I remember quite clearly. He actually called you the cockblocker way further your second birthday"

Shikamaru felt his eyes widen in horror, and heard himself splutter trying to form a coherent sentence, but Tsunade wasn't ready to finish "You have Paternal Jealousy Syndrome"

"Okay, you just made that up" Shikamaru couldn't help but chuckle at the gall of Tsunade to be making jokes in this situation, about this topic. She laughed out laud good naturally.

"Yeah I did. But anyways, the point is that you are jealous of your baby, most men are, normally they go through that not as strongly but again, it probably is because of your own intelligence. I bet you calculate the probabilities of everything and how he is going to affect your life with Temari. You need to step up Shikamaru, or you are going to lose everything. If tonight wasn't your wake up call I don't know what will, because now you know what it would feel like if you lose both of them"

And it really just came to that didn't it?

"Don't feel bad," Tsunade carried on "This happens a lot, and the fact that you are an only child, not used to sharing isn't making things better. But you need to stop seeing him as an invader and start seeing him as an addition. He is an addition to the family and you had an amazing father to show you how a father should love his child. Do not ruin this kid" she finished with a menacing drawl.

Tsunade was right, but he couldn't shake his fears out of him. It was beyond him. This whole thing was. And all what she was saying he knew already, that's why he felt so fucking guilty and rotten all the time. Since all this started. His doubts must have shown in his face because the ex Hokage sighed once again.

"I want you here for therapy once a week. And you will also accompany your wife to her labor exercises" She stated and didn't gave him the opportunity to object. She stood up "come with me" she said, and he knew she was going to take him to see his wife.

Temari was lying motionless with her big belly rounding the blankets. She looked very fragile and weak.

That scared the shit out of him. He looked at Tsunade for help. She patted his back and said "She is sleeping, will for a while. She needs to replenish strength and every night it would be good if you touched her belly and infuse chakra on the baby, that way he will take yours and not drain Temari's"

His fast brain finally catching up in his turmoil of thoughts, he noticed that all the time, they have been talking about a baby and a he.

"Is the baby a boy?" He humbly asked for confirmation, Tsunade smiled and nodded.

A boy.

A baby boy.

A shadow nin baby boy.

He managed a shaky breath somehow still numb about the whole ordeal. He went to seat next to his wife and took her hand and grabbing it tightly. He peppered her face with light kisses somewhat reverently. She was his sun after all.

Hours like this passed. People, doctors, came and went but he never let go of her hand nor paid them any mind. He kept thinking about everything.

Was he really wrong for feeling this way about his son?

Damn it!

A son.

Wow, just wow. He just couldn't get the awe out of his mind. He still felt lost and scared, but now. It was a tad different. Before tonight he never really thought about the baby as a person, or as his. But it was, it really was, a future shinobi with his blood, to keep on going on generations and generations of traditions and legacy. And it was his. His and Temari's.

Shikamaru wanted to love it, as much as Tamari did, so he could be happy about it as she was.

Now that he saw it a bit differently, his always, helpful brain came up with an idea. He realized that he had always felt somehow detached of the baby. He caressed his wife belly infusing some chakra in it and he felt a kick in response. That made him smile. He tried to imagine his son, how would he look like. If he was a Nara, chances were that he was going to look just like him. So he tried to imagine a miniature Shikamaru running around with Tamari following him around.

That image wasn't scary at all.

If anything it was rather cute.

Heart pounding heavily in his chest. He started to pull different strategies. He always felt better when he could plan and see things in a logical sort of way. So, he figured he needed to humanise the baby and give that abstract being, that wasn't that abstract at all, judging by the enthusiastic kicking his hand was receiving, a name.

A name that wasn't snotty brat.

Thank God he never really talked about it with anyone, he seriously doubted people would keep liking him if they knew he called his own son parasite. He shivered guiltily at his own stupidity. Tsunade was right about the socially awkward thing. He was so painfully awkward. Always hiding in that air of nonchalance, and laziness, well he really was lazy. Like all Naras.

He wondered if his baby boy was going to be lazy like him.

Another smile.

But yeah. Awkward...

It had always been that way, he still didn't fully comprehend how he managed to make friends through his life, least of all, landed himself a gorgeous sex bomb as a wife either. For Shikamaru, the brain and the heart didn't never really get along. And mostly all he did, his brain decided. Except for a select few of people who could actually make his heart warm in one way or another. Temari at the top of the list, who actually got the prize for being the only one of turning his brain into mushy pudding ad pulling his heart's strings like no one else.

That's the moment his wife stirred and moved, coming into consciousness, his heart pounded erratically and happy to see her finally waking up. He stood up, never letting her hand go, and kissed her forehead. He felt the tears he had been suppressing the whole night finally come out. Temari blinked and stared at him, asking with her eyes if their baby was ok. Shikamaru let a shaky breath mix with his tears. He smiled at her and told her,

"What do you think of Shikadai as his name?"

Temari's eyes welled up with tears, and started fully crying. She understood, of course she did. She always did. She got with just that, all that he went through, that their baby was ok and that he was going to pull his own ass out of this one somehow. But mainly she understood that they were going to be okay.

It was the first time Shikamaru saw Temari cry. God he truly must have made her so unhappy with all this, he registered with sadness. Because bringing Temari to tears...he used to think it was impossible. He was the crybaby not her. Never her.

They hugged tightly and cried, until the first rays of sunshine filtered the window.

---

The next three months of Temari's pregnancy were full of wonders in Shikamaru's opinion.

First of all, he started to medidate the baby issue every single day. Tsunade in one of the therapy sessions told him to think positively about the baby and all the things he could add to his and Temari's life. He came with a bunch of truly awesome stuff. Starting with the legacy of his clan, he was actually looking forward teaching his son all he knew about his clan. He also figured that he was going to teach him Sunagakure's culture along with Temari, in case he ended up being a Kazekage, he wanted his son to love Suna as much as his wife did. So, he went and told Kakashi that he wanted a vacation regime added to his employment contract. He wanted the time to take his son there, and create bonds in Suna. One month in winter, two weeks in summer. Kakashi looked at him as if he was crazy, but he couldn't really refuse. The Union really needed Shikamaru's genius.

He calmed Kakashi, telling him that in case of war or something similar they could forgone the vacations but only and if they were talking about the fifth shinobi world war. No less. Kakashi promptly threw an icha icha book to his head.

Other positive things he imagined doing with his son included the Nara forest, taking him to cloud watching, pulling some pranks and him making friends with the Ino/Cho sprog that were already in the way. Ino was in her fifth month of pregnancy and Karui already had a girl a month ago. It was funny actually when Choji so good naturedly told him that they had his back and they were also going to try have babies, that Karui was already pregnant and no one knew yet. So yeah, one third of the Ino/Shika/Cho new generation was already gracing their lives.

The baby was absolutely gorgeous as well, a tad bonny but beautiful, and it made him realise that babies weren't all that scary after all. They were attention seeker leeches though.

No no no. No negative thoughts.

This sometimes kept happening to him. But Tsunade told him to keep it positive no matter what and that's what he did.

Hinata's baby had been born some months ago, and he was the exact replica of Naruto. Seeing Boruto for the first time, made him wonder if Shikadai was going to be that much alike him, and the only feeling he got from that was pure unadulterated pride.

So yes, he was doing a lot better in the baby department.

He went around apologising to all his friends for his behaviour, it was all quite troublesome and embarrassing, but he pulled through it. The worst part was that none of them resented him, not even a little, they were just happy he seemed more lively and actually talking about the baby.

Calling him Shikadai helped a lot. Now his conversations sometimes went to him without him even noticing it. For example, if he got late to the office, because he fell asleep he would say "Sorry, Shikadai wanted pickles and donuts at three in the morning" and people would smile indulgently at him and let him be. Who would've thought that his baby boy was going to be such good excuse maker? Not that it wasn't true and Temari's cravings weren't crazy. Because they were. Fucking insane cravings, let me tell you.

Also the sex was absolutely mind blowing, Temari was randy as hell 24/7, so much that sometimes she would drop unannounced in his office promptly get him out of his pants, blow him until his toes curled and then bended herself abandondly on top of his desk for him to fuck her at pleasure.

And man, it was his pleasure indeed.

Naruto was one hundred percent right on that one.

He also apologised to his in laws, who very unceremoniously told him that next time, they were going to cause bodily harm. But he made peace with them by actually inviting them to the Nara forest to see the deer.

His mother though... His mother made him grovel like hell. He knew he deserved it, and he man up and did it, but man it was a drag. He went with her to the Nara cemetery, and she forced him to tell his father and then Asuma all of his behaviour. Shikamaru could swear he saw both his father's and mentor's spirits glaring at him. And ok, yes he felt like a petty shit piece of garbage, but he was getting better.

With Temari everything was pretty much the same, he always treated her with love and respect so there weren't much changes there. Except maybe now, they would talk about the baby and their expectations, and parenting approaches to certain issues that might come to be when Shikadai arrived. He put his foot down with the basinet in the bedroom thing though..

Temari, god bless his stubborn wife, wanted Shikadai to sleep with them until he was a tad older, so they would be able to reach him in case he needed anything during the night. He absolutely refused. His bedroom was his and Temari's. He was going to share his life, his house, his everything with his son, but their bedroom was theirs and theirs only. He reasoned with her, that it was important to maintain a private space for them, since keeping up with a good relationship between each other other would also mean a more estable and pacific home for their child.

Sometimes Shikamaru loved his brain.

The things he could pull out of it were amazing, because it certainly shut Temari up and accepted his reasoning. In favor of marital peace though, he told her that if one night every once in a while when Shikadai had a nightmare, he could sleep with them. But to not make it a routine.

At which Temari smiled, and proceded to show her appreciation by being extra vigorous on the couch.

All in all, things were picking up for Shikamaru.

Was he afraid?

Yes.

Was he manning up?

Yes.

Did he actually love Shikadai?

And here was the problem, after all the therapy, the grovelling, the wake up call and the overall troublesome months he had been having since the beginning of all this. He couldn't bring himself to actually truly feel love for Shikadai. He cared in the sense that he wanted him alive and happy, and also as a legacy of his own. But he cared of him still with a sense of detachment and he couldn't shake the feeling of him invading his life and eventually taking Temari away from him. That was his outmost and relentless fear and he hadn't been able to shake it off.

But then, life has its funny twists ain't it?

It started with the first contraction Temari had. They were already half expecting it since she was already in the nine month mark. They took everything they needed which was already prepared, because if there was something Shikamaru's brain was good at, it was at planning, and getting things ready was planing. So very relaxedly they went to the hospital, they reached it a little nervously and out of breath. Shikamaru's belly was literally quivering in fear, but again, he pulled through. Hours and hours of hand squishing, cursing, and actually a punch or two, the last punch actually managed to knock him out for a bit. Man, Temari, really was a strong Kunoichi. Until something very funny happened.

"Shikamaru do you want to hold your son?" Tsunade asked him gently. So he, with shaky legs and hands, taking a deep breath, he braced himself to his inevitable doom and took the little bundle of blankets and baby Shikadai that Tsunade gently put in his arms. Then he looked at his son, and his breath caught.

There.

The most fragile and small human being he had ever seen. And Shikamaru couldn't believe something so small was even possible. Baby Shikadai yawned, blinked and finally stared at him intently.

Shikamaru, felt his legs give up on him, thankfully Tsunade and Sakura helped him to a chair, where he continued to stare at the wonder in his arms.

Shikadai had the exact same eyes as his wife. The green of it a little blurred by the light blue typical of new borns but it was just there. Temari's eyes. The most beautiful eyes that he had ever seen, the most cherished feature his wife had, and had him enchanted since the chunnin exams all those years ago.

Abruptly, with a certainty that blowed his mind into putty pudding and clenched his heart in a wonderful way, Shikamaru realized that he loved him. Because there wasn't anything in this life or the next one, that could make him hate or be wary of something that possessed such eyes.

Because you see,

In the end,

In all of Shikamaru's genius,

In all the possible scenarios he pictured,

Did he ever imagined, falling in love with his son too.

---

Epilogue

Shikamaru was absolutely besotted.

His baby boy was in one word, perfect.

And he was so much alike him that sometimes it truly made him wonder what in the hell he was so worried about.

For starters the kid would sleep sixteen hours a day, through the night he wouldn't even make a sound. Which left him with enough time to ravish his wife at will at nights.

They would have dinner, play with the baby that had started to laugh, and man if it wasn't the most glorious sound he have ever heard. Then they would put him to bed, and he would take Temari to indulge in some adult fun.

His favourite pastime now was taking pictures of Shikadai and his wife, he also loved to see his son sleeping, to the point that he would forgone his own naps just to watch him sleep. His wife would laugh at him and tell him he was a creep. He didn't care really. Shikadai was his, and he was beautiful.

The tricky part started when Shikadai got older. Meaning, he started to get in trouble, typical toddler stuff that more times than not, had his wife annoyed at him at his absolute incapacity of actually saying no to the kid or to scold him. Such thing started to bug Temari to a point where she bluntly told him that she was not going to stand being the bad cop always, so he better start being more stern or he could kiss his nightly fun times with her goodbye.

Now, that had Shikamaru preoccupied.

On the one side he had the beautiful hazel cat eye like eyes of his son telling him "daddy please" and in the other he had beautiful hazel cat eye like eyes of his wife telling him "Shikamaru!". There was no way around it. He just couldn't deal with all the puppy dog eyes in his house that turned him in putty pudding and made him smile like a buffoon.

Thank god, his amazing brain, came up with a solution. And it was very simple, so now when his son came running at him and ask him some mischievous thing or other, he would say "Go ask your mother" which had his son pouting and his wife annoyed at him, to which he would tell her "what? I didn't say yes to him", and he would smile innocently at her, causing Temari to roll her eyes at him but leave it at that.

Sometimes, Shikamaru could literally see himself high five his brain.

He also loved how well behaved Shikadai was, it was like he was born to be a good kid. Like for example, if they took him out, he would never made a scene or make a ruckus out of stupid things, he was very much alike Temari personality wise, and he loved that about him. He was very bright and talented. And overall Shikamaru truly thought his son was perfect and could do no wrong.

He was proven otherwise when Shikadai turned twelve and Temari got pregnant again.

And, man, why in hell did this keep happening to him? What was it with all the unplanned pregnancy in his household? Like, really?

Shikamaru couldn't believe he was reliving this again. This time around though, remembering Tsunade's lessons he tried to maintain his thoughts at bay and always positive. Sure they were still young, thirty two is a nice age, right in the middle of young adult and adult adult. He was going to have a randy wife to satisfy and overall his whole experience with Shikadai taught him that he wouldn't lose Temari to their children, if anything they brought them even closer, if that was even possible.

The problems came, shockingly enough, from Shikadai.

When they told him his mother was pregnant he received the news subduedly and he even got as far as saying congratulations. Which should've been a warning to them to or least give them a deja vu but it went unnoticed.

Then they started to notice the gloom around his son, he would bang doors when he got annoyed, and yell out of nothing. The first time he threw a full on temper tantrum, Temari and he were so shocked and surprised by it, that they didn't fully understand what it was even happening until the main door of the house got banged forcefully and Shikadai had disappeared into the night.

"He is more like you than I expected" his wife told him.

And that's when it sank. His boy was jealous of the baby, he began to pay attention, and saw Shikadai more than once glaring at the bump in his mother's belly, and his attitude altogether was so rotten that he truly saw first hand how he must have looked to everybody when Temari was first pregnant. No wonder everybody tried to meddle.

His son's friends also tried to cheer him up, ChoCho to the point of dragging him to baby cloth shopping, Boruto and Himawari taught him fun sister and brother games, Inojin bought a full set of paintings, colours and papers. Sarada, practical sweet she was, bought diapers, milk bottles and dummies, and even that weird kid Mitsuky gifted his son with a blanket, one that had little snakes all over it, and it was plain creepy. All of which had Shikadai, enraged and gritting his teeth.

He fully on had another temper tantrum in the middle of the street, shoved all the gifts to his friends head and proceed to use the sand burial technique Gaara has taught him. Yep he destroyed all the gifts. Then he turned around no caring who was looking and disappeared into the woods.

This whole scene being watched by Shikamaru and Temari, who were stunned by their son outraged demeanour. They promptly went and apologised to all his friends for their son's behaviour. And man, wasn't it such a drag, always having a good perfect well behaved kid, they didn't know that you could actually feel embarrassed by your son's actions.

Everybody took it good naturedly though, Naruto, now the Hokage even tapped his back and told him "Like father like son, eh?" And continued by laughing out loud like the rest of his own friends.

Man, parenthood was such a drag. No matter that this was the first time he actually felt this way, but he was truly embarrassed by his attitude, specially because it reflected on his own past fears. His present fears, if he was honest. At least a little. He was also a little afraid of breaking the status quo with this new baby. It was just...what if the new baby behaved like his son was now, but like...24/7? He didn't think he could live with that.

But then Shikamaru looked at his still gorgeous wife, who looked a tad upset and hormonal, in the I am about to cry or kill someone kind of way, and Shikamaru sighed and realized he couldn't let this problem with their son fester anymore. Man, why was he such a mushy pudding when it came to those two?

Troublesome.

Truth was, the kid was behaving like an absolute brat. Not that he blamed him, if anything, he understood his son so completely. So, he finally decided he needed to talk with him.

He took his boy to the Nara forest to star watch. Shikadai was annoyed, and frowning, a permanent feature in his face these days.

"You are jealous" Shikamaru informed him making his son jump in his own mind reverie. His son also tended to get lost in his own brain, and his mind and heart didn't truly get along either. With a sense of paternal pride, he noticed that his son was just like him. And like Tsunade all those years ago, it was now his turn to pull him out of the mud. So, he proceded to tell him all the story. Everything that happened when he first learned that his wife was pregnant with his son, how he felt, what he thought and how it all made him feel. His son was silently listening to him. And Shikamaru loved moments like this, because he truly felt his son respected him and listened to him like no one else. Probably because their brains were wired the same way, and they were each other's truly only person in the whole world who could understand one hundred percent what it was all about.

Shikadai felt he was being invaded and that he now was going to lose his parents to the new baby. They weren't going to be the tripod but a full on table, and he didn't like that, he hated it. So Shikamaru went as far as telling him that he used to call him snotty brat to which Shikadai snorted and uttered "wet dippers" making Shikamaru laugh at his son's name for his own brother or sister.

"Come" He told his son, and ushered once more back into the house. When they entered they saw Temari making dinner, she turned around and smiled at them. That beautiful smile that kept making Shikamaru's legs weak. Even after all these years.

"Temari" Shikamaru said, and stared at his wife all serious business. "I think is time to discuss baby names" his wife was completely baffled by his request, she then looked at her son, who looked very much uncomfortable and still clearly annoyed.

"Yes of course" She replied, and she ordered them to get the table ready. Once they were all seated, Shikamaru started to design strategies of how to bring the topic. He needed his son to humanise the baby, so he was trying to come up with the best way to do that.

"It's a girl" Shikadai headlong said, and then proceded to yawn and look uninterested while picking at his food. They weren't fooled by it, but they were surprised at the certainty in Shikadai's voice when he said that.

"How do you know?" Temari, asked him gently, trying to pry their son out of his shell. Shikamaru comprehended then, that his wife was way more intelligent than his own mother. Not that he would in any way say something like that to her. Or his mother. But she knew when to be kinder and how to push his own son's buttons better than his mother did all those years ago to him. She had a way with Shikadai, and suddenly he became aware, that the key of the thing were once again his wife's eyes, and how his son, so much like himself, was absolutely putty when it came to them. Damn those eyes, they were definitely a Nara's weakness. Maybe he should go about and write that in the Nara's clan diary. Then he decided against it, knowing that such great weakness for his clan shouldn't be put on paper.

"I don't know," His son finally answered, unable to deny his mothers eyes. He sighed as if all the weight in the world rested in his shoulders "Its Chakra feels female, and also is a magnetic sand one"

His son last statement had him and his wife gapping at him. They knew their son was a very talented Shinobi, and they knew that thanks to his parenthood Shikadai blended villages techniques, but the capability of seer definitely weren't one of them.

Shikadai sighed again faking nonchalance and explained, "The sand eye jutsu combined with the shadow sensing jutsu". Well that was interesting, it could mean some rough form of a Byakugan then. He couldn't stop the smug paternal prideful smirk that was full on displayed in his face. Temari rolled his eyes at him and probed his son with her eyes. Wasn't it amazing how they could feel fear, joy, or weakness just by looking at Temari's eyes?

He could literally feel the need of his son to actually bolt and avoid those eyes like the plague. Temari had them in the palm of her hands, didn't she?

"Shikari" was all his son said, he thanked the food, put his plate on the kitchen sink and escaped to his room. No loud bang this time around thankfully.

His wife looked from the direction his son had disappeared to him and afterwards smiled happily at him. Man, wasn't she the most beautiful woman ever? He couldn't help himself, he moved around his chair to be closer to her. He then hugged her gently and kissed her. He rubbed his hand on her large belly while infusing some chakra in it. Temari hummed contently and he kissed her again.

Sometimes, Shikamaru was truly baffled at the fact that his family, perfect and harmonious as it was had so little to say to each other. To most people, like the Uzumakis, the silence would be too overwhelming, but for them...there was no word wasting. And now, in a very Nara household manner, they had a name for the little girl that was about to arrive to their lives.

It was perfect.

---

Shikamaru saw and felt his own son walls crumbling like paper, the minute he laid his eyes on his sister. Shikari was the exact replica of Temari, he didn't think she had anything Nara. She was beautiful just like his mother and as always, his very helpful mind came up with the ten thousand scenarios where a daughter as beautiful as his wife actually grew up.

Man, he felt like all the times he had said, what a drag in his life didn't even compare to this one.

This particular problem was truly the outmost drag thing than anything he had ever encounter in his life.

Having Shikari took some time to get used to. She was nothing like Shikadai. She was energetic and an attention leech. He had to admit that even all the love he had for her couldn't totally shake the fear and loneliness of feeling a little left out by his wife. He sighed a lot and was a little depressed if he had to be honest. But trying to be positive, he thought that at least he had thirteen years with her almost completely, since Shikadai was so well adjusted and attuned to them, this new addition was anything but.

It was attention, attention, attention 24/7.

Shikamaru was at his wits end.

The help surprisingly enough came from his own son, who told his tired and exhausted parents that they were going to install a Friday night rule in the household. In which they would go out on a date and he would take care of his baby sister. They looked at their son gapping at him, and Shikamaru had to admit that when he thought he couldn't love his son more, he came and pulled one like this, he couldn't be more proud of him. He looked at his wife hoping she would accept immediately.

Much to his chagrin, Temari, in a very mother hen fashion told Shikadai that the baby was too small, that Shikadai was a teenager and should go about having fun with his friends, and that Shikari was their responsibility. Shikamaru felt like running to the North Pole again. Then his son in a very mature way, told her that it was very important for them to maintain a healthy relationship with each other, and that included romance. That that would make their home more stable for him and Shikari and he would actually have parents not a pair of zombies instead.

Sometimes, Shikamaru loved how his son's brain worked.

Specially when it followed his own reasonings.

Temari caved in. And so he got to have his wife all by himself for a night a week. Shikadai also started to help more and more in the house and the baby. He would invite his friends who were also very besotted with baby Shikari and play while they took care of her. On Saturdays Shikadai would go out with his friends to do whatever the adolescent sprog did these days and all in all they managed to balance it all.

Shikamaru, couldn't be more thankful to his son. He was a treasure. And he was also thankful of him being his firstborn, because he didn't think that he would've survived with Shikari when he first became a father. His son was so helpful, because he truly understood him, and he was very grateful with life for giving him a son as mature and sympathetic as Shikadai.

Don't get him wrong. Shikari was the light of his eyes, but she meant trouble. Hell, she had given him trouble since day one.

Troublesome things follow Shikamaru. That's just how it was.

So, the peace in his household, only lasted a few years.

Shikadai was now fully grown up, he kept living in the house, Shikamaru didn't know if it was healthy to have a twenty eight year old son still living at his parents. But he was dependant on the kid, he admits it. His son was his world, along with his wife and daughter. And he knew he needed to nag him more firmly to get the hell out of the house. Shikadai was with Sarada now, so Shikamaru was hoping that his son finally got her pregnant so they would be obligated to get married and out and he wouldn't have to say anything.

And man, wasn't the last part just awful? He? Related to that creep Sasuke? It was a nightmare. Specially when his very helpful brain did the math for him and became aware of the fact that the night he had seen Sasuke and Sakura half naked was probably the night his future daughter in law was conceived, counting on the fact that she was born just six months after Shikadai. Ugh.

Troublesome.

The thing was, his son was amazing right? He worked in diplomatics like he and Temari. He was a very powerful Shinobi, much more so than himself, and he was very handsome and a gentleman. But his best feature was that he helped Shikamaru get Shikari's potential suitors the hell out. It was awesome. They were a team. His son and he. A team whose only true purpose was to preserve his little princess virginity. Taking care of such a task was absolutely exhausting if he were about to do it by his own he seriously doubted that he would manage. What with all the randy teenagers around and his daughter's gorgeous looks it was barely impossible.

Some years passed and shikamaru's problems with his troublesome children didn't end. First he did manage to marry off his son to Sarada, but they had been married five years and still no grandchildren. His wife told him that his son was like him and he was going to enjoy his wife as much as he could. But really? Are you kidding me? He was not getting younger, and he wanted to enjoy some grandchildren before he couldn't lift his ass from the tatami floor.

Then there was his daughter, who, in a truly feminist independent kind of way told them that she wanted to travel, get to know the world, experience things and whatnot. Shikamaru didn't want to wallow in the thoughts of what the hell was she talking about when she said experience. He obviously knew this was a lie. She was going to Suna, she wanted to be the next Kazegage and didn't know how to break it to her overprotective father and brother that she was going to live three days away from now on, hence maintaining the illusion for them of her coming back home.

Sometimes, Shikamaru hated how bright his children were.

Shikari was in love with Suna, and seeing how his uncles never got married she figured she wanted to succeed her uncle Gaara. She was very powerful, even more so that Gaara, in the sense that she used shadow techniques to increase her magnet sand control. She purposely forgot or chose to forget that Gaara actually had a successor. Shinki. Who was Gaara's adopted son. He didn't want to put his nose in that business, specially considering that there was going to be a politic battle over that. Shinki having the support of Suna, and Shikari having the blood of the Kazegage. He pitied Gaara really. Poor creepy innocent thing he was, in the middle of those too. Six months later though, he was informed along with his son that Shikari and Shinki were going to wed. To which father and son in a very Nara broody kind of way threw a temper tantrum of epic proportions and forbid it completely. For starters the creep had twelve years on her and also, they were cousins for fucks sake, wasn't it incestuos or something? His very attentive brain told him that Shinki was adopted and they weren't technically blood related.

Shikamaru thought that that was just semantics.

See?

Troublesome.

Said prohibition lasted until his daughter, actually grabbed her mother's Tessen and in a very Temari fashion, blowed them to the sky, all the while yelling that she was fucking in love and she was going to marry Shinki and fuck him into oblivion.

That night is what Shikamaru and Shikadai call the horrible unmentionable event.

Man, the images his daughter's statement brought to his head...it was just not on. At all.

Shikadai, bless him, waited until Shikari got married to get married himself, and soon, Shikamaru and Temari after almost thirty years, suddenly found themselves with an empty nest. Shikamaru worried himself a little wondering how it was going to be now. Having getting used to his troublesome children. He didn't need to be worried though, because he was still strong and youthful and he and his beautiful wife reacquaintance themselves with fucking in every available surface they could manage just like when they where newlyweds.

He was very proud of his decision of marrying at nineteen. Since now, he was still young to enjoy his wife like this.

Temari was perfect as always. She still retain that beauty that made his heart beat fast and his toes curl. She was strong, and stubborn, and harsh, and she loved him. She gave her life to him, so all in all Shikamaru was happy he could count with his wife to get his mind occupied and out of his troublesome children.

He did wonder if this road to parenthood ever ends though? The worries, the fear, the uncertainty...

One day he was told by a very depressed version of his son that he was going to be a grandfather, and that had him a little anxious. Would his son forget about him and Temari in favor of the new baby? Damn. His brain was truly awful. But it was just...his beloved son had a new family now, his own family. Where did Temari, Shikari and he get in that picture? But then, he held his granddaughter for the first time and patted a confused and overwhelmed Shikadai on the back. Lifted his gaze and saw Shikari, Suna's new Kazekage, hold Shikadai and congratulate him, he saw his wife talking quietly with Sarada with happy smiles on their faces. Kankuro, Gaara and Shinki in a corner, looking out of place and like the bunch of social awkward people they were. He sighed, then he looked once again at his granddaughter. She was beautiful.

She yawned, blinked, and stared at him.

Shikamaru gulped.

Those eyes...

Crap. Here we go again.