I wrote this when I was bored and decided to post it only after I've had a bad day. Why? Because you guys always cheer me up.
I do not own or claim to own CSI: Miami characters. This is fanmade and I make absolutely no profit off of this. I do this for my own amusement.
This is intended for mature audiences.
Warning: slash.
***
Frustration
"How Horatio managed to stuff so many incompetent morons into one lab is beyond me," Stetler growled to himself as he rode the elevator down to the second floor.
The fraternization and procedural rules everyone at MD-PD had to follow were incredibly simple, exactly what about them didn't the CSI lab understand? Calleigh and Eric were becoming a bit too distracted with each other during work hours. Ryan obviously hadn't dealt with his gambling problem. Natalia and Valera couldn't stop fighting.
"And 'H' can't even assert himself enough to be seen as an authority figure. Probably because he lets them call him 'H'. Really, people, is 'Horatio' too long for you? Is 'Lieutenant Caine' too complicated for your feeble little minds to-"
-Ding. Second Floor: CSI labs.
"Oh boy. Here we go".
Rick Stetler was met by the searing and accusing eyes of the investigators. Eric kissed Calleigh one last time before he shooed her off to ballistics. He glared at Stetler as the IAB Sergeant timidly walked into the brightly lit glass labs. Ryan stalked off into trace, trying to hide from Stetler. But Ryan wasn't priority, he wasn't the one breaking things.
He could see Valera and Natalia arguing in the DNA labs, knowing he had to get in there quick before it got physical.
"And what makes you think you're so high and mighty?" Natalia snapped.
"Probably because I actually trained and worked my ass off to get to this position! You practically got it as a birthday present!" Valera yelled back.
"I've had a very hard life! My late ex-husband broke my arm!"
"Good!"
"You are such a bitch! I LOVED him!"
"That's because you're a fucking idiot!" Valera shouted, waving her arms around and accidentally knocking Natalia's purse off the counter. The purse tumbled to the floor, spilling lipstick, mascara, compacts, foundation, eyeliner, and blush all over the DNA lab. "And what do you need all this makeup for? You're finding a murderer, not going to prom! I can't believe this!"
"Well I can't believe you call me a whore!"
Rick was about to break up the fight, but chose against it. This was getting interesting.
"Me? Just me? Natalia, everyone does. Because you are. You're just lucky that Calleigh doesn't listen to such things".
"How am I a whore?"
"Oh come ON, you're constantly flirting with Ryan and Eric. I saw you hitting on Kyle AND Horatio, now how is that not really fucking creepy? What about Frank? Did you ever hit on Frank?"
"Frank's married! What kind of moron do you take me for?"
"Oh, so you'd try to have your boss, his son, and the guy with the girlfriend who looks at firearms all day. Good thing they're not married! Really fucking brilliant".
"Do you know why Ryan won't go out with me anymore?"
"He probably just doesn't want herpes".
"Then what's his excuse for not wanting to date you?"
"You fucking bitch!" Valera yelled, pulling a can of bronzer out of Natalia's purse and chucking it at her head.
Natalia ducked just in time, the can spinning past her and into Rick's grasp. He cleared his throat, demanding their attention.
"Sergeant Stetler," Valera gasped, "I'm… I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to-"
Rick held up his hand, calling for silence.
"Look," he sighed, "I don't care if you two hate each other. But try to keep it outside of the lab".
"Yes sir," they both nodded sheepishly.
"And if I hear any word of sabotage, you two will both be suspended and I'll bring a real investigation down here".
"Yes sir," they nodded again.
"No more fighting," Rick ordered as he turned his heel and left the room.
Stetler walked back to the CSI lobby, the can of bronzer still in his hand. He had never seen one before. He looked it over, examining it. Eric walked up to Rick, wanting to deal with whatever the IAB sergeant had for him head on.
"Stetler," Eric sighed under a phony smile, "how can I help you".
"Delko, I think you know what I have to say," Rick answered, still playing around with the can of bronzer. "You and Calleigh: I'm fine with it, but keep it during your off-hours".
"I really don't see how this is any of your business".
"Well, you bring it into the lab and you make it my business. We can't have you distracted while you're working a case. Besides, people are beginning to see it as sexual harassment".
"'Sexual harassment'?" Eric echoed, "How the hell is this-"
"I'm just the messeng-"
"No! You listen to me, Stetler. What Calleigh and I have between us is perfectly-"
-Oh God, I let him get started, Rick thought, not at all paying attention to Eric.
Over Eric's shoulder, Rick could see Horatio smoothly moving around his office. The sun reflected off the glass walls and played on his breathtakingly gorgeous red hair. His Armani suit wrapped itself around his perfect body, clinging wantonly to his form. The first few buttons of his white silk shirt were undone, showing off a bit of chest.
If Eric would have stopped ranting for a second and looked over at Stetler he would have noticed that the IAB sergeant was slowly undressing his boss with his eyes. Rick shifted around uncomfortably, hoping that nobody had noticed the growing bulge in his pants. He drew a quick breath in through his teeth as Horatio bent over to pick up a file that he had dropped onto the floor. Stetler could only imagine what it must be like to run his hand over the sweet contours of Lieutenant Caine's –
"-Are you listening to me, Stetler?" Eric snapped, bringing Rick back to reality.
"I have made my statement clear, Delko," Rick sighed, still playing around with the can of bronzer. "What happens between you and Ms. Duquesne is a violation of the- oops".
Rick had accidentally sprayed the bronzer all over the front of Eric's white shirt. The print expert looked down at his ruined shirt, twitching slightly in anger and frustration.
"Sorry," Rick timidly apologized, putting the can down before he got himself into any more problems. He took a tissue out of his pocket and tried to wipe it away, only making the problem worse. "Oops," he repeated, slowly beginning to back away.
"You ruined by best shirt, Stetler!" Eric snapped, not sure how much longer he would be able to control his temper.
Valera was watching the whole thing play out through the glass walls of the DNA lab. Natalia went to the break room to calm down and Valera was left all alone. She waved extravagantly to get Rick's attention. He looked over, wondering what was going on. Valera clearly mouthed one word: "Run".
Without question, Rick followed her orders, bolting to the other end of the labs like a bat out of hell. Eric glared after him, upset that he didn't even get his adversary into a shoving match. He ran after Stetler, putting professionalism aside if just for a few moments. Rick shoved into the bathroom and rested his full weight against the door, keeping Eric out.
Ryan stood at the urinals on the opposite wall; he looked over his shoulder to see what all the commotion was about. Rick leaned against the door, looking over at Ryan as if to say "I meant to do that".
"Running away from Eric?" Ryan chuckled, turning his attention back to the task at hand.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Stetler lied, wondering how long Eric will keep shoving at the door.
"Yes you do," Ryan smirked, "You've been picking at him and Calleigh again, haven't you".
"Actually, Mr. Wolfe," Rick sighed, deciding to change the subject, "there's something I've been meaning to discuss with you".
"Now?" Ryan asked, looking over his shoulder again.
"Yes," Stetler grunted as Eric slammed against the door again.
"You can't be serious".
"Have you been gambling lately? Because I have heard that you have been having some trouble shaking your addiction".
"This isn't happening," Ryan whispered, rolling his eyes and resting his forehead against the tiles.
"I want to help you, Ryan. In fact, I am prepared to give you the name of a very good counselor who is willing to help you with your problem".
"This is harassment; you can't just corner me in here".
"I just want to help".
"This is fucking ridiculous".
***
Horatio couldn't focus on his work and it was driving him crazy. His mind has been in the gutter all day and he couldn't for the life of him figure out why. He was afraid he was going to overlook something because not enough blood was getting to his brain.
Cursing quietly, he decided that he would have to duck into the bathrooms and take care of himself. He figured that if he could get his libido to shut up just for a few minutes he might get some actual work done. He stalked off in the direction of the men's room, hoping that nobody would notice how tight his trousers have gotten.
"Eric, what the hell are you doing?" Horatio sighed as he watched the print expert throw himself against the bathroom door.
Eric backed away, embarrassed that his boss caught him acting out in such a childish manner.
"Stetler… he… my shirt… Calleigh…" Delko stammered.
"Get back to trace," Horatio groaned, "I'll take care of it".
***
"I'm just saying that you need to confront your addiction head on," Stetler babbled, hoping that Eric would be a good distance away from the door when he finally opened it.
"Will you shut up?!" Ryan yelled, still at the urinal and not able to get any business done because Rick wouldn't stop talking.
"Stetler, open this door," Horatio called from the lab, shoving slightly on the door.
Rick stepped aside, letting the redhead in.
"What's going on here?" Horatio ordered.
"He won't leave me alone!" Ryan cried helplessly from the urinals.
"Stetler, what the - Let Ryan- You don't -" the lieutenant stammered, "You know what? Take me to your office; I need to have a word with you".
"Couldn't we just go into your offi-"
"-NOW, STETLER!"
Rick led Horatio out of the labs, into the elevator, and through the opaque halls of IAB until he reached his corner office. The redhead walked over to the windows and closed the blinds. Rick nervously drummed his fingers against his desk. He was absolutely positive that Horatio was going to inflict some physical harm on him this time, like he had threatened to do so many times before.
"Horatio, let me explain," Rick started, "About your team, it's not persona-"
"-I'm not here to talk about my team, Rick," Horatio sighed; hardly believing that he was doing this.
"Then what is this about?"
The lieutenant walked over to the door and locked it. Stetler began to move in protest, knowing how violent Horatio could get if things aren't going his way. Horatio walked over to the IAB sergeant until Rick was backed into a wall and they were mere inches apart.
"I've seen the way you look at me whenever you pay my lab a visit," Horatio whispered.
"I have no idea what you're talking about".
"I know when you're lying, Rick. Cut it out".
"What do you see?"
"Rick," Horatio sighed, "you can barely take your eyes off me, off my hair, off my body… off my package".
Stetler was blushing furiously, he didn't know that Horatio caught him doing that. He worshiped the redhead's body, as far as Stetler was concerned, Horatio was formed by the right hand of God.
"You want me, don't you?" Horatio whispered against Rick's lips.
"No," Rick lied, hoping there wouldn't be any follow up questions.
The lieutenant closed the distance between their lips, holding Rick still as he did so. He sensuously bit at Rick's lower lip, begging for more. Stetler timidly opened his mouth and let Horatio swirl his tongue around in it. The experience and lack of air was making Rick quite dizzy, he tore himself away from Horatio before he lost his sense of balance. Horatio reached down and gave Rick's crotch a good grope, making him yelp.
"You liar," Horatio breathed, feeling Stetler's erection through the fabric.
"What's this about, Horatio?" Rick asked, his body getting quite flushed.
"Well, don't be too flattered, because it has nothing to do with you. But I'm in a state of mind that's not allowing me to get much work done. If you know what I mean," he whispered, digging his hardness into the other man's thigh and pulling a gasp out of the sergeant. "I'm willing to give you a onetime offer, take it or leave it".
Rick turned his face away, he didn't often think of Horatio actually feeling such things. He always thought the lieutenant was above the raw and untamable drives of lust.
"What do you need?" Rick finally asked.
"I just need you to suck me dry," he said bluntly.
A blush had taken over Stetler's cheeks; he turned his face away, embarrassed.
"Of course, I wasn't expecting you to do something for nothing. And I plan on taking care of that right now," Horatio answered, pulling off Rick's belt and lowering himself down to his knees.
Rick swore softly as he felt the redhead's fingers wrestle with his the button on his pants. Stetler threw off his tie and unfastened the top few buttons of his shirt. He pressed his body against the wall and threw back his head as he felt the tip of Horatio's finger run up the long and pulsating vein of his throbbing cock.
"Say you want me," the lieutenant breathed against Stetler's member, running a single fingertip over his balls.
"I want you," Rick gasped quietly, barely able to breathe as Horatio ran the finger back up and circled the tip a few times.
"I can't hear you, Rick," the redhead whispered with a smirk, smearing the pre-cum all over the tip of Rick's cock.
"I want you!" Rick half shouted, practically sobbing with the teasing that Horatio was giving him.
Without another word, Horatio leaned in and licked the pre-cum off. He felt Rick's fingers tangle in his hair as he started sucking on the other man. He placed his hands on Stetler's hips, keeping him from thrusting forward. Horatio kissed and licked and sucked on the IAB sergeant's heated flesh, wanting to make sure that Rick would give him something worthwhile in return.
After a few long moments, the lieutenant finally got enough courage to take as much of Rick's cock as he possibly could. He dipped back his head and carefully began to see exactly how much he could fit in his mouth.
"Oh fuck!" Stetler quietly repeated between gasps as he felt himself slip into Horatio's throat.
Concentrating and hoping that they wouldn't hurt each other, Horatio slowly let go of Rick's hips. He gagged slightly as Rick impulsively thrust forward, but was careful that Stetler wouldn't feel too much of his teeth. Tears spilled from the redhead's bright blue eyes, Rick definitely had more than he expected; he was having a difficult time breathing.
"Horatio!" Rick moaned as he came down the lieutenant's throat, thrusting erratically.
Stetler lovingly ran his fingers through Horatio's hair, stroking him as the other man swallowed everything down and licked him clean. The redhead stood up and trucked Rick back into his pants. He barely made any eye contact as he walked over to the couch, shifting around a bit to get comfortable before he opened his trousers.
"Lieutenant?" Rick whispered, approaching the other man.
"Please, Rick," Horatio sighed, "let's just get this over with".
Stetler knelt down between Horatio's legs as the redhead revealed his hard and leaking cock. Rick's lips were moist with want and anticipation. He leaned forward as he felt the other man's fingers lace into his hair.
Horatio relaxed into the couch, throwing his head back and covering his eyes with his free hand. He would really rather have someone else do this to him, but he was desperate, and Rick seemed willing enough.
When Horatio did this, Rick felt his heart sink a little. He knew that at the moment he was just a toy to the lieutenant, but he wanted to mean something more than that.
Rick gently laid soft kisses up the length of Horatio's shaft, pulling down his pants to give himself better access. Horatio took his hand away from his eyes and helplessly grasped for the slacks that had already been pulled from his body. Batting the lieutenant's hand away, Rick ran his tongue around Horatio's tip. He tilted his head and ran his lips up against the cock he had wanted to taste for so long as he lightly ran his fingers around the base, making Horatio swear softly.
He sensed Horatio's body tense up, Rick knew that he was already pretty close, but he didn't want it to end so soon. He gently squeezed the base of the redhead's cock, keeping him from cumming for just a moment longer. Quickly, Rick pulled Horatio's boxers off of his body.
"What the fuck are you doing?" Horatio gasped, his face flushed.
Before Horatio could protest any longer, Rick deep throated him. The lieutenant moaned in want, thrusting lightly up into Rick's mouth. Stetler slid a finger into his mouth, running it up against the other man's pulsating vein. Horatio bit back a moan. Then, without warning, Rick slipped the lubricated finger into the lieutenant's tight opening. Horatio bit back a louder moan.
"Rick?!" the redhead gasped, wanting to resist Stetler's advances but was too overwhelmed by the sensations to move.
Stetler kept going, lightly pumping the other man's puckered entrance as he continued to taste his essence. His body acting to its own will, Horatio pushed against Rick's finger, trying to take it deeper. This was just the encouragement Rick needed; he slipped in a second digit and began scissoring. Horatio bit down on his fist to keep from screaming as Rick stretched and suckled him.
Stetler pulled his aroused cock out of his trousers, knowing that Horatio may never forgive him for what he was about to do. In one swift motion, Stetler pulled his fingers out of the lieutenant, removed his cock from his mouth, spat into his palm, slicked himself up, and thrust his own member deep into Horatio's tight and clenching hole.
A muffled scream filled the room, Horatio rising almost completely off the couch. Rick's body tensed, suddenly very unsure of himself. The lieutenant panted, still biting down on his fist. Their chests heaving and their bodies beaded in sweat, Horatio and Rick's eyes finally met.
"Horatio?" Rick stammered, buried up to the hilt in Horatio's body and not knowing what to do next.
The lieutenant's heart was racing. His ears were ringing. All thought had stopped. Every fight he had ever had with Stetler had disappeared from his mind. Only sensation remained. Cautiously, he lowered his fist, freeing his mouth.
"Move please," he whispered.
Rick began to lightly thrust into Horatio, watching the other man moan in pleasure under him. He opened Horatio's white silk shirt and maneuvered him onto his back, stroking his soft red chest hair all the way.
Horatio was breathing in shallow gasps. He had never felt anything like this before. Every once in a while he would think about what it must be like, but never with Stetler. It was a little painful, but he had never been so hard in his life. He moaned and dug his nails into the couch cushions as he felt the pre-cum spill down his length.
"Rick!" Horatio gasped as the IAB sergeant hit his prostate "Oh fuck, Rick! Do that again!"
Rick smiled to himself as he drove at that exact point, over and over again; harder and harder. He watched the redhead writhe under him, begging for more. He pinned down Horatio's wrists, keeping him from touching himself. Horatio's body tensed up under Rick, he was going to cum if he was touched or not.
"Oh no you don't" Rick growled, squeezing the base of Horatio's cock again.
"No!" the redhead practically sobbed as he felt Rick pump his seed into him, "Oh God, just let me cum!"
"In a moment," Stetler gasped, thrusting into Horatio's body until his own cock was spent.
Stetler took one of Horatio's hands, balled it into a fist and brought it up to the redhead's lips. Reluctantly, Rick pulled out of Horatio's tight heat, wrapping his lips around the lieutenant's shaft once again.
The redhead bit down on his fist, keeping himself from screaming in ecstasy as he finally came down Rick's throat. Stetler let him thrust wildly into his mouth, loving the taste of his sweet essence.
After a long moment, things finally calmed down. Horatio came back down to earth, completely exhausted. Rick tucked himself back in before he re-dressed Horatio, lovingly adjusting his clothes. He lightly kissed and licked his way up Horatio's body until his tongue was sweeping over that of the other man's. Horatio let himself be pulled into a long and sensuous kiss, tasting himself in Rick's mouth.
Horatio looked sleepily up into the other man's eyes, not sure of exactly what just happened. Stetler pulled the lieutenant to his feet, and made him presentable. He was kissed deeply once again, the IAB sergeant holding him close and cuddling him lightly.
"You're welcome in my office any time," Stetler whispered, his soft chestnut brown eyes beaming down on the redhead, "but right now, you have to get back downstairs before people start getting suspicious".
Horatio nodded, leaning in and kissing Rick lovingly on the neck. "That was fucking amazing," he gasped, still a little flushed, "you know… I might need you again sometime".
"Anything you need, Horatio," Rick sighed with a glimmer of a smirk on his features "anything you need".