This is all AU. Been quite a while since I've written anything, so I hope you enjoy this. I will provide a translation of certain words at the end of each chapter.

Chapter 1

- Haustmánuður -

Cold. It was always so cold here. The Jötunheimr. One would have to be very foolish to not dress properly to survive this world. If the frigid temperatures did not claim thy's life, the fearsome Frost Giants would.

Within the numbing darkness and frozen mountains of black stone, there they would be hiding. Ever watching for those whom enter uninvited. Watching and patiently waiting to strike. The feared monsters of all the Nine Realms. The Jötun. Although, they are just like any other race that exist, believe it so or nay. For the wars have long since destroyed this plane, their families, structure, order and security remained untainted. Striving still while trying to restore itself to its days of glory. Appearing the opposite of their reputations of being nightmarish monsters, as spoken for nearly two millennia in fables one would tell a child before bed. The nightmare race. Cloaked in a nearly permanent night, here, the Jötun people thrive. As though none of it had ever happened. It's always dark. I dislike this darkness greatly.

I still do not know why, after falling into the void and living in nothing for so long, why doth I end up here? Awaking within the very world I sought to destroy in honor of my 'father'...

My own brothers.. I end up here in the Jötunheimr.

I need to write all of this down, perhaps to simply entertain myself, but it keeps things in order should mine eyes seek to read of details past.

This is my recounting of how I came here, given crown... The broken throne..

In the snow I awoke. The cold had already began it cruel pains on my body. Everything was stiff, moving was far more difficult then it should have been. A thin layer of ice covered my flesh and clothing. It didn't help that I was buried beneath it. So cold this place was. How long had I lain in the snow? Days, perhaps. Hours..? I'll never know at this point. I would assume it no longer mattered. For I was alive, within a place I had some familiarity of.

I was alive.

When I was finally on my feet, I then felt the true bitter nature of it all. Completely becoming conscious and alert. I've felt agonies of all kinds, but this was something I have yet to feel. Pained noises came from my paled frozen lips. The air was sharp, crisp to the point that breathing alone was a task. So cold. Doing my best to trudge through the dangerous lands of the darkness. Many times I fell, simply wanting to give up. But no. I wouldn't. I refused to die such a lowly, petty death as this. I would never let myself freeze to death.

Getting up for a number I couldn't remember, I pushed on. I shivered gravely as I moved. Wincing with every step as it pulled and pulled on my muscles. I was so alone. There was absolutely nothing around me aside from the winds and echoes of my weight on the snow. My only comforts was that of my own breaths that wanted to cease.

Why was I not dead..?! For a small time it made no sense to me. Anyone would be claimed by this climate by now and fall into the arms of Hel. But not me... Why? Why?!

Alone. So alone. I had no home to return too. None to mourn, none to love. Nothing. A raging sorrow filled my mind once again as the plaguing memories of the All Father looking down at me came again.

'No Loki...'

Oh how that saddened stare tore my heart out. It burned with fires so fierce with the single eye. A piercing stare of saddened disappointment. So why remain within my brother's towering shadow. I would never be seen as he was. Thor Odinson. I let go of Gungnir.

Or was I thrown... I cannot remember.

I could have done it. End the ever lasting risks of war against the Frost Giants. I could have... Conflicted my mind is still by this truth. More so on why I was never told to begin with. My true heritage. But it all made sense now. Fregga was the only one who bared me no ill will, and for that she will always stay out of my way. Always lied too. Truth is far more bitter and deadly then the lies themselves.

For I was not Asgardian, as I was led to believe all my youth within the safety of the Palace. No, I was in fact a monster as well. The long lost son of Laufey. I too was of the Jötunheimr. Frost Giant... Monster... Evil. The shamed runt offspring of Laufey, given the name Loki. Born a monster and raises as a god. If my own existence was not ironic then I fear I know not what would be. I've lost my train of thought...

Right. Detailing of my waking here. It's so cold here. The vast near barren lands of the darkened world felt as though they stretched on forever. Even though you can see the other realms in the skies in far distances, this place never seemed to end. Days it seemed that I trudged through it all. Perhaps went in circles, I slowly stopped caring for it. Stopped caring that I could no longer feel my hands, nor my feet, or even most of my body. I just did not care any longer. While my mind ran over the past events leading up to now, I saw only how I was wronged. What I meant to accomplish, I was wronged for it.

Madness, it was called. Was it? Was it madness... No, it was them whom lost their minds. I was attempting a glorious favor by doing this! Closing my eyes as i kept this now numbed walk going. Stumbling far too many times to count as my feet battled against the ice and snow. Then I fell.

I laid there, forced heaves for breaths as the snow welcomed me and cradled me. The shivering has long since faded from my body. I felt nothing. The freezing air did nothing. The snow I laid in did nothing. I would rest now.

Sleep sweetly. I was tired. The silence around me besides the winds blowing and the sounds of my own pathetic sounding breathings, I started to realize how peaceful it was. I welcomed this silence. But there, there was someone near. I could hear the many slow steps that crunched the snow itself. It was not someone, it was something. Too many heavy steps, to many steps for just one source of breathing.

Forcing my eyes open, there mine eyes beheld a frightening sight. A large snow beast stared down at me. Similar to one min bror vanquished the last time I was here. But 'twas far larger up close then anything. Had I been able to make an expression with my frozen face, it would have been a fearful one.

It's breath was far more foul then anything, even worse then Volstagg's and Thor's breath after a feasting. Snarling lowly, I accepted this as the last of me. I had no more strength to fight. Was either the cold to claim me, or this. Personally, I would choose this. I felt its hot, rancid breath on me, hot enough to begin melting the layer of ice that still covered my skin. I stared in defeated fear. This was my ending.

Shutting my eyes, I refused to stare into its mouth of jagged teeth that would at any second tear me apart. Would I feel it at this point? A snarling came again as I felt a strange lifting and warmth roll over my side. I looked. And I wish I hadn't. The beast had me in it's jaws. The warmth was my blood, simply hanging there as this beast began tearing to free my body from my armors to consume me. I wanted to fight, at lease making it a worthy death. But I could not even twitch a finger. I have no idea how much I bled before I started to feel a mild spasming beginning to take over.

This was my end. And far from glorious it was. Eaten without quarrel by a beast of this world. I heard many more feet rushing over. My blurred half open eyes gazed at the sky as the darkness seemed to get darker while I spasmed.

What was it I saw before darkness consumed me? Heads... Many heads. Hands maybe.. That's all I remember of waking here...

Haustmánuður (mid September – mid October, "autumn month")

Gungnir is the spear of Odin.