Once upon a time, there were two princes from two different kingdoms. Prince Vincent, of England and Prince Diederich of Germany. They were both two young handsome, unmarried princes. And remained so, for quite some time despite the many court ladies who would lavish over them and the many families who would offer up their young brides to the princes. They were best friends, but to everyone who wasn't an idiot, it was obvious that they were in fact, lovers, and had denied all the princesses, because well, they really weren't at all interested in women. They were powerful and rode horses and solved crimes and did what was normal princelike behavior, all under the guise of being roaming bachelors, and everything was going well for their relationship despite it being expressly forbidden by the court. That was until one day, Prince Diederich was sent on a quest.
"No, I don't want you to marry the princess!" Vincent protested, hurt that his lover had been sent on a quest.
"The king and queen sent me on this quest, I have no option to refuse, they'll become suspicious if I don't find a bride."
"But you have me."
"Vincent, please. It's not a hard quest and the princess will need me anyways. All I must do is venture to yonder mountain to find the tower protected by the dragon, slay the dragon and rescue the princess named Rachel from an awful fate that was bestowed upon her by an evil witch," Diederich explained.
"You know what dragon you can slay?"
"Vincent stop, I'm leaving at dawn," Diederich explained. And with that, their lovers quarrel was put to an end.
At dawn, the prince woke up to find Vincent and apologize for his rudeness, but he was nowhere to be found. Thinking that their relationship could be salvaged, not even as friends, Diederich took off on his mighty white horse to the tower on yonder mountain in a cloud of sadness and despair. Through the morning he and his horse rode through the bramble bushes and patches of thorn with the black mountain looming over them. When the prince had finally gotten to the tower, he had realized that the dragon was not lurking outside, but on the inside of tower, waiting to spring a trap! Prince Diederich drew his sword and prepared himself for an epic battle, walking through the castle door, expecting to not make it out without injury.
Inside of the castle, the prince took a mental inventory of the setting. He ventured further, seeing that there was a massive dragon inside of the castle! It was huge, the size of a small house, with teeth sticking out of it's mouth that must have been twelve inches long. The laviathan had bright red scales and it's nostrils let out smoke... as it slept like a little baby dragon on a pile of gold and treasure, completely unaware that prince Diederich had entered the castle. So he quietly stepped up the spiral staircase to the tower, his footsteps quiet but quick. The pace as which he scaled the winding upwards spiral made him dizzy. When he reached the chamber door to the princesses bedroom, he breathed a sigh of relief. He had made it through his quest. He opened the door and the princess had her back turned to him. The bedroom window was open and she was looking out into the landscape, the wind from the open window rustling around her long gray hair in the breeze.
"Good day, princess Rachel. I have come to rescue you from the dragon and take your marriage," he said politely.
"Well hello there beautiful," said the princess, who turned around and revealed herself to be none other than Prince Vincent, in a dress!
"What the hell, Vincent?!" Diederich exclaimed, shocked by this sudden turn of events.
"Marry me, my prince!" Vincent said, laughing at his lover's shock.
"Can I come out now?" said a small voice from inside of the bedroom closet, also laughing.
"Sure, thing, he's here," Vincent said. Out from he closet came the beautiful princess Rachel wearing Vincent's clothes, her blonde hair tied back and her blue eyes watering from tears of laughter.
"I'm sorry," Rachel apologized.
"Whats going on here?" Diederich asked.
"Well, Dee. When you told me that you were going to marry the princess I left my castle right away to get to her first. When I approached the dragon it got me in it's mouth and I screamed out for help," Vincent explained.
"Yes," Rachel said, "When he got down there, as my pet dragon was about to kill him but with his last breath Vincent was begging me to not marry you, because he loved you. So I told my sweet baby dragon to let him go," Rachel said.
"Wait, what?" Diederich asked.
"Well, I don't like men very much and I was always tired of my parents trying to sell me off like a common whore to you princes!" Rachel exclaimed, "I don't want to marry a man, I want to live on my own and be happy by myself. So I ran away to this castle and got a pet dragon to keep back all the nasty princes who wished to take me away from my happy home," Rachel said.
"So Rachel and I made a deal, I wouldn't tell anyone of her plot to kill all of the princes to come to take her body, so long as you and I get to share the castle and never have to deal with the outside world interfering again," Vincent said.
"You can be my watchdogs!" Rachel said with a smile.
"What do you say, Diederich, you want to marry this prince?" Vincent asked.
"Absolutely," Diederich replied and they shared a kiss.
"And so the princes lived happily ever after in their castle with their pet dragon and lots of dragon gold, the end," Rachel said.
"Mother why did you name the princes after Father and uncle Dee?" Ciel asked.
"Because I'm not very creative, sweetie. Go to sleep," Rachel told him.