This is the first chapter of my S/T fanfic. It will be set on two different, interweaving time planes - one will tell the story from S/T's arrival in Dublin to their escape in 1920. The other will start with the birth of the Bransons' daughter till the end of S3. The second time plane will be obviously AU - Sybil will live. I will try to explore the Bransons from various angles. Hope that you'll enjoy. Reviews are very welcome :)
LIVES
I will arise and go now, and go to Innisfree,
And a small cabin build there, of clay and wattles made;
Nine bean rows will I have there, a hive for the honey bee,
And live alone in the bee loud glade.
And I shall have some peace there, for peace comes dropping slow,
Dropping from the veils of the morning to where the cricket sings;
There midnight's all a glimmer, and noon a purple glow,
And evening full of the linnet's wings.
I will arise and go now, for always night and day
I hear lake water lapping with low sounds by the shore;
While I stand on the roadway, or on the pavements grey,
I hear it in the deep heart's core.
- W.B. Yeats, "Lake Isle of Innisfree"
April 1919
The morning sun was already shining brightly when Sybil Crawley opened her eyes. She yawned loudly and stretched her legs under the sheets. While Sybil had become accustomed to waking up early for her shifts at the hospital, she had lately returned to her previous habits. Breakfast was definitely not served at Downton at an early hour, after all. I'll sleep a little more until Anna comes to wake me up, the young woman decided. She turned on her mattress in order to find a more comfortable position for more sleep. The former Nurse Crawley had to admit that she felt oddly exhausted today; her legs felt as if she had walked quite a distance.
A sudden realization hit her. She quickly opened her eyes again. The young woman's suspicions were immediately confirmed. Lady Sybil Crawley was no longer living at Downton. Since yesterday, Miss Sybil Crawley was living in Dublin.
Sybil still couldn't believe it. She had firmly began a new chapter in life. It wasn't just a start of a new life; it was a start of a new life with him. A joyful thrill spread throughout her body. It wasn't even a bit surprising that her desire for sleep had already evaporated. The youngest Crawley girl stretched her legs and then quickly went out of bed. She approached the window and drew the curtains open. The city of Dublin was already bustling with activity. How different it was to Downton, where everything always seemed to be in slow, cautious motion. More was always happening downstairs, of course; but even there everything was happening in accordance with a certain schedule, and each action needed to fit into a previously chosen frame; there was no room for creativity or improvisation. Only during the war had the frame got loosened a bit, but Sybil felt that she would soon learn that Downton's loosened frames couldn't even compare with Dublin's lack of them.
Breakfast was quite a stressful event for Sybil. After all, she was now living with her future mother-in-law whom she had met for the first time just a day before. Any young woman would have felt similarly uncomfortable in her place, and Sybil's situation was even more complicated. Sybil Crawley, the youngest daughter of the Earl of Grantham, wanted to marry a working class man from the family of Irish republicans. Sybil understood that Tom's family had valid reasons for being suspicious of her motives. She knew that the only way to deal with this situation was to make them know her real self, the self that did not allow to be reduced to a stereotypical picture. In a way, it was exactly what freedom meant for Sybil Crawley – the ability to escape rigid frames that you had to fit in. That was exactly what she and Tom had in common – they were both frame breakers.
Mrs. Branson did treat Sybil with reservation, but was at the same time perfectly polite. The young woman had to admit regretfully that if only her father had treated Tom in this way, she certainly wouldn't have had much to complain about.
"It was delicious," said Sybil tentatively after she had finished her meal.
"I'm glad that you liked it. You must have eaten more refined meals at home, I presume, " responded Mrs. Branson in a matter-of-fact tone.
"Refined, maybe. But that does not mean more tasty. I enjoy simplicity in all areas of life."
"Is this not just some diversity for a person who has everything?"
Mrs. Branson was a blunt woman, just like her son. Sybil sensed that she would often be tested in this way until the Irishwoman got a full portrait of her character. At least, despite reservations and maybe some prejudices, she's trying to get to know me, while my family still sees Tom only as a chauffeur, came a bitter realization.
Sybil awoke from her reverie only to see Mrs. Branson watching her cautiously with raised eyebrows. It was high time to respond. "I don't think so. I've been like this since I was a little girl, and if it was only a diversity, I would become bored of it now."
"Maybe it's a rebellion, then?" The older woman's question was once more straightforward and demanding a clear-cut answer. Mrs. Branson did not even attempt to hide her worries connected with his son's unlikely fiancée.
"I always see rebellion as something variable which changes in relation to circumstances. I don't see a constant trait of character as an expression of rebellion."
Mrs. Branson only nodded and rose from her chair in order to wash the dishes; an appeased small smile was now visible on her face. Sybil gave a sigh of relief – it seemed that she had passed at least that test favourably. Quickly, she also rose to her feet. "Maybe I can help you? I may not be the most experienced person when it comes to daily chores, but I really, really want to learn."
Mrs. Branson once more gave her only a small nod. It was one of the things in which she differed from Tom – she was a woman of few words. However, the faint smile on the Irish matriarch's face served as a message to Sybil that the youngest Crawley sister had just scored a few more points.
Tom finished work in the afternoon and immediately went to his mother's flat. He still couldn't believe that Sybil was there. Frankly, part of him expected to learn that it was all just a dream and that Sybil Crawley still lived at Downton Abbey. But no. Once he entered the kitchen, he saw her. She was busy laying the table, while his mother was stirring up the soup.
Tom didn't know how to behave. Neither did Sybil, who quickly noticed him and smiled broadly. It was still strange to be observed by other people, to be out of the hiding place that was a secluded garage. If they had been in the garage, he would have run to her and kissed her passionately, but he did not feel like doing this in front of his mother.
Mrs. Branson was however a very shrewd woman; she immediately sensed what was going on and turned her attention towards the nearest window. Tom quickly read his mother's signals and approached Sybil without further hesitation. He placed a soft kiss on her cheek and greeted her with a tender Good afternoon, love. Sybil, then, responded with a look so loving that the young man couldn't catch his breath for a moment, still not believing that they were going to be married soon.
The three of them finally sat to the table. It felt really strange - not long ago they ate their meals at two different tables, in two different worlds, even though those worlds were situated in the same building. Never mind that they had always, since their first meeting, been feeling that they were from exactly the same world. Thankfully, it was finally time for the external to be coincident with the internal.
It felt also a different kind of awkward for the young couple. They both realized that it would always be like that from this dinner onward - shortly they would be a family. Again, only formally – because they had been feeling like a family for a long time.
After dinner, Sybil and Tom decided to go on a walk together. Tom was determined to acquaint his fiancée with at least a few places in Dublin.
It was so strange yet again. They had started walking hand in hand together around Downton village after the announcement of their engagement, but whenever they had done so, they had been a sensation. As a result, they deeply craved for the experience of being treated as a normal couple. It wasn't that they were ashamed of their relationship, but they felt profound sadness that a cross-class relationship was still something that shocking to so many people. In a way, surprised reactions hurt their idealistic belief in social change, though they still didn't doubt that the desired change would come, and that one day they would be able to publically tell their story without anyone raising an eyebrow in disbelief.
The sun started to set down as Sybil and Tom turned from the main street and entered a small park. The young couple decided to rest for a while on the bench situated in the nearby greenery, which was quite hidden from any prying eyes.
"I love Dublin already," whispered Sybil as she relaxed into her fiancé's embrace.
"We arrived here only yesterday..."
"It doesn't matter. It's a charming city and here I'm starting my new life with you. That's enough to make me love it. Power of associations and all of that. You know, in other circumstances I wouldn't find garages to be exceptionally pleasant or romantic… but I actually do find them as such because of us."
Tom could only smile in response and reached for her hand. "I still can't believe that you're here. "
"Then I must make you believe it, " laughed Sybil and pressed her lips to his. After years of painful longing, both of them couldn't get enough of kissing each other. They were finally free to express all the love that they had been feeling for each other for so, so long. Every kiss seemed to be a compensation for each unsaid I love you and each repressed tender touch.
"Stop doing this in public where children can see you, " a shrill voice suddenly interrupted them.
Sybil and Tom jumped from each other and saw an elderly woman looking at them disapprovingly. By the woman's side, stood a little blonde girl in a green dress.
"Young folks these days do not know how to behave… such displays in public… it was unthinkable in my days, " the woman finished expressing her displeasure, took the girl's hand, and walked off.
"So, even here we're disapproved of, " remarked Sybil.
"But it's a normal kind of disapproval – the one stemming from the differences between the elderly and the youth. The conflict that has been present in the world since its beginning."
Sybil only nodded and directed her eyes towards the leaving pair – the woman was hurrying to be as far from the bench as possible, whereas the little girl… Sybil needed to catch her breath – the little girl turned around and smiled broadly. Her intense blue eyes showed something that Sybil and Tom received rarely – approval.
Next time: New Life 1920
Their life was to change irrevocably – not only because they were now parents, but also because they had to find a new place to live. They needed a new space that would be just theirs and they were impatient to create their own small world again.