"What the heck" I scoffed I and just finished my book and it was around 11:00 and I was infuriated the book ended with the guy she loved ended up being the one who killed her mother and then he said "you're next" and killed her with a fork! It was awful this was a frekin' romantic comedy. Well then. I stood up from my bed and stretched up on my tepee toes and threw the retched book to the floor. I walked into my kitchen and herd a lot of banging and yelling "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" came the mans scream, I ran to my bedroom closet and pulled on my Chucks and Beatles sweatshirt then I practically ran down my front door, jumped the stairs, and headed for the ally next to my apartment. There I found a gang of skinny white guys dressed as gangsters taking turns beating this poor guy up. "Hey!" they all looked at me and the getting beat up guy fell to the ground like a lump of jelly. I felt bad like it was my fault that he just got beat up. "Hey little lady why don't you go wait over there so I can finish this ass hole"

"Well first I am not a little lady and second all of your gangster pants are falling down. Third you touch him again…" he cut me off "Ya and what will you do?"

"the only thing that effects cowards like you" and with this I pulled out my very broken blackberry and threatened to call the cops. They all were gone in a matter of 30 seconds. I went to the lobby of my apartment and asked for a wheel chair and the guy to come help me and to not ask questions.

"He's on my couch"

"what why? What if he's like a drug dealer?"

"Jenn chill out he got knocked out and now he's laying down"

"well as your best friend I have to protect you" I am on the phone with Jenn my best friend. I had to tell someone about the lump of jelly on my couch. "mmmagrreftablo" came the muffled voice on my couch

"I think he's eating the pillow I got you"

"I didn't like it either" I whispered

"what!"

"oh. Nothing but I gotta go he's waking up"

"okay bye"

"bye girly"

I moved to the couch and I herd huffy breathes and then "aaaaooooooemmmmmmgaaaaaaaa"

"wakey wakey eggs and bakey" I moved his feet back on to the couch and fixed his pillows "I'll make you something to eat" I moved to the kitchen and started on ramen noodles and tea. "I feel so English"

He started to get up but I didn't notice at first he made it to the front door before I turned around and caught him "Thank you miss but I won't be needing your services anymore" WOW! That was a strong British accent

"Um I don't think so… your back is bleeding and so is your face. Again."

"I'll walk to the hospital" he turned as if to leave