Kate starts to walk towards the podium, her shirt lifting from her skin as the movement pulls Castle's hand away from its protective place, nestled in the small of her back. She steps up once, twice then a third time until she's raised higher than everyone else; the sun is bright, blinding almost, and she squints under the shadow of her Police cap, trying to focus. Pulling her speech from her trouser pocket she swallows, an attempt to steady herself. "I can do this." she thinks, flicking her gaze back to Castle.
He's there, with reassurance in spades; tall, upright, supportive, and he mouths back to her. "You've got this, Kate." She breathes again, and starts to speak.
"Roy Montgomery taught me what it meant to be a cop. He taught me that we are bound by our choices, but we are more than our mistakes. Captain Montgomery once said to me that for us, there is no victory. There are only battles. And in the end, the best you could hope for is to find a place to make your stand. And if you're very lucky you find someone willing to stand with you."
She pauses, turning her head to look at Castle again, feeling the knife of grief twisting once more in the pit of her stomach. Shards of support flash in his eyes; he's there, willing her to be strong, urging her to continue. He doesn't even have to physically place his hands on her to be holding her up, something she's intensely grateful for today, of all days. She takes another deep breath and continues.
"Our captain would want us to carry on the fight. And even if there is..."
Her words fade into the background as something catches Rick's eye; a bright, flicker of light, a reflection of sun on glass, and its origin processes in his mind as his eyes widen. He calls out her name, dives towards her, tackles her to the ground, but his movements aren't quite quick enough. He's just a millisecond too late and the bullet outsmarts him, sinking through layers; her starched uniform, her perfumed skin, making its way through layers of bone, fat and muscle before finally coming to a stop, embedded somewhere deep within her heart.
He lands on top of her, his eyes wide and tear-filled, his hands fumbling, voice shaky. He doesn't know what to do; should he stem the bleeding, should he move her, should he chase after the sniper? But her gaze is so wide, so full of fear that all he can do is scoop her closer; he cannot, will not leave her side. He snakes his one hand under her head and grips her waist with the other, his body covering hers protectively as he whispers to her.
"Kate… Shhh, Kate, please…"
He begs her not to surrender; not to give in. He pleads with her.
"Stay with me, Kate. Don't leave me, please. Stay with me, ok?"
She can't go. She can't. She's gasping for air, trying to hold on with every inch of her body, but the blood seeps down, through skin and fabric and out on to the grass and she can't anymore. If she's going to die, right here, she has to know. She has to.
"Kate, I love you…
I love you Kate."
Her body relaxes, her jaw unclenching, and the sunlight glints off the trail of a tear, snaking down from her closed eyelid and disappearing into her hairline. He calls her name again, a desperate "Kate!" that echoes off the gravestones surrounding them, but in that moment he knows she's gone and he stops resisting, letting Esposito pull his body off hers so Lanie can start to administer first aid.
As the blue-clothed bodies congregate around her, clouding his line of vision, he thinks, 'Shit, I should have done that.' He should have moved quicker. 'I should have done something.' Anything.
He sinks into Esposito, his breathing shallow, and he feels his heart break in two.