"I don't want you around." Izzie sat in her little beat up Honda and cried. She laid her head on the steering wheel and cried her heart out. What would you do if the man you love suddenly told you he didn't want you around? Exactly. Izzie turned her head and stared out the window, her body shaking with sobs. She didn't understand. She was a good person. She was an excellent doctor if she did say so herself. She helped the sick, the poor, the helpless. Izzie did everything a good person should and yet why did this happen to her? A sudden thought hit her and it made her heart break more. Maybe it was her. Well of course it had to be her what else could it have been? Maybe she was too nice. Maybe she was too loving and caring and affectionate. Maybe she was too 'little miss goody to shoes'. Maybe that's why Dean Winchester didn't want her around anymore. Maybe he wanted a woman who could hold her own, didn't give a damn about anything or anyone, lived on the edge, and liked it rough. Maybe Dean wanted someone that wasn't her.
Maybe he lied all those times when he said she was perfect.
Izzie lifted her head and sniffled, her sobs vanished, but the tear stains and the red eyes still gave away what she had been doing for the past two hours. She stared into the rear view mirror and grimaced. She looked horrible, her face was splotchy and her hair was a mess. Thank god she wore waterproof makeup. Izzie slumped down and stared out the window once more, her gaze landing on the shabby motel, zoning in on room 40C. She should leave. She should start her car and press down on the gas pedal until she left Seattle. Where she would go? Anywhere but here. It was apparent Dean didn't, never, wanted her so what was the point in sticking around? The best thing was to get as far away from him as possible.
Sharp pain in her palms made her jump. She glanced down. Blood. She had dug her nails into her skin and now blood was oozing out. She wiped her hands on her jacket and realized why she was now bleeding. Hate. Hate was flowing in her veins. She looked in the rear view mirror again. She had a very pissed off expression on her face. Granted she was still splotchy and eyes red rimmed but underneath lied one very pissed off girl. She suddenly realized she hated herself for falling for Dean Winchester, for not listening to her friends when they warned her to stay away from him. She hated herself for foolishly believing they could have a happy ending. She hated him for making her feel like a fool, making her act and feel worthless and vulnerable. She swallowed and decided maybe she better head off now. Driving always calmed her down. She reached in her pockets for her keys and came back empty handed. Wide eyed she searched her small car only to find no sign of her keys which only meant... She looked back to room 40C. Her keys were lying on the little table by the door. She had been so upset by what Dean had said she had forgotten her keys. The only reason she was inside her car now was because she had left it unlocked. She let out a small sigh, her forehead creasing, and eyebrows furrowing. If it were anything else she would've said "screw it" and just left, but of course the thing she left was the thing she needed most. With a look of despair she climbed out of her car.
Dean sat up in one of the two single beds, leaning against the wooden headboard, white sheets covering his naked lower half, the noise of a hot brunette taking a shower in the bathroom, and cursed Izzie Stevens. He cursed her for existing. For being able to worm her way into his head. She was all he could think about. Even when he and that hot brunette Stephanie...Tiffany... what's her name were going at it like monkeys all he could think about was a certain, tall beautiful blonde. A certain tall beautiful blonde that changed his life.
She had been an innocent bystander to a vampire attack. Of course after Dean and his brother came rushing in, all knights in shining armor like, beheaded the vamp and burned it Izzie wanted to leave and go on her merry way, back to her apple pie life. He should have let her. But he was a womanizer and in his eyes she was just another woman to play. So he told a lie. Not the first and most definitely not the last. He said Izzie had to stay because the head vamp's followers could come after her for revenge. She was convinced and so was Sam. Sam would believe anything sometimes. But anyways Izzie stayed. And not only did she become his sex partner down the line, along the way she slowly but surely wormed her way into his heart.
Dean ignored it. He ignored the signs. He ignored the fact that when her skin brushed his he felt electric shocks, that when she said his name it drove him crazy, and when she looked at him with those big brown eyes... Dean ignored it. Told himself it was nothing because she was only a distraction, a nice piece of ass, a way to relieve his pain, nothing more. So he ignored when Izzie said his name in her sleep a smile on her face. He definitely ignored Izzie's expression when he hit on other girl's at the bars they would pass through. He definitely didn't feel guilt and his heart definitely didn't hurt. He felt nothing.
And when Izzie met a guy in said bar and suddenly started ignoring Dean, when she started looking at that douche with big brown eyes and when she said his name in her sleep, Dean definitely did not get jealous. He didn't get jealous. When that douche, Trevor his name was, would suddenly be all over Izzie when Dean walked in the room, he didn't feel like punching Trevor. But when two weeks, two slow agonizing weeks full of anger and jealousy went by, Dean realized something. He had fallen in love. Player Dean Winchester had fallen in love. And he didn't like the fact that the woman he had fallen for was all over another dude. A dude that was a douche. It wasn't cool. But then suddenly one day Izzie came home, red rimmed eyes, and said, "You were right, Dean. He was a douche." And Trevor and Izzie were no more.
Two hours later Dean decided to make his move. Yeah he might've been a dick for doing it right after she lost her boyfriend, but he didn't care. But when she was staring up at him with those brown eyes, he faltered. He lost his confidence and said the words that would follow him for the rest of his life. I don't want you around. The total opposite of what he wanted to come out of his mouth.
The full impact of what he had done hadn't hit him until her eyes started watering, her face crumbled, and the light in her eyes died. That's when he knew he had made a monumental mistake. Before he could backtrack, before he could somehow try to fix it, she left. And when it was apparent she wasn't coming back he went straight to the nearest bar and brought a hot brunette back to the motel room. He thought, more like hoped, maybe she could make him forget about the pain at least for one night. That didn't happen.
Izzie tried the doorknob to room 40C and frowned when it turned easily in her hand. Dean always locked it unless... Whenever he came to the motel room drunk he never locked the door sometimes he never even closed. Just stumbled inside and passed out. So an unlocked door could only mean... She pushed open the door and took a step inside, closing it behind her. Dean was the first thing she saw. Not passed out on the floor but sitting up in bed. His head jerked towards Izzie and upon seeing her stood up in shock, the sheet falling away and exposing his nakedness. Izzie's eyes widened and she turned red before looking at the floor. She heard him sputter and after a couple seconds of rustling, clear his throat. She hesitantly glanced over and saw he now had on his pink flamingo boxers.
They stared at each other awkwardly, both racking their minds for something to say. Just when things couldn't get worse Dean's bam-bam-thank-you-ma'am decided to make an appearance. Shit hit the fan.
Izzie cursed herself for blushing. Why should she? Seconds ago she hated this man and now she was blushing like a little schoolgirl because of him? What was wrong with her? Plus it's not like she hadn't seen him naked before. After she heard him clear his throat she took that as a sign that he was decent. She glanced over and almost smiled at his pink flamingo bottoms. Then her gaze met his. They stood there, feet apart, staring at each other. Until she heard a door open and a, "Dean baby I got a little present for you." The sound of footsteps coming to a halt then a, "Oh. Whose she?" Her world shattered. Again. How many times was Izzie Stevens going to suffer today? Did God hate her? She swallowed and then realized this could be the woman that was everything Izzie Stevens wasn't. The woman Dean desired.
She didn't want to glance over. She didn't want to see what woman was standing there in Dean's motel room. She knew. But she couldn't help it. So she looked over and her anger diminished. The sadness and self-pity returned. She could feel tears stinging her eyes. The woman was dressed in black lace lingerie. No doubt what she wanted. Izzie felt her heart sink.
She took a closer look. The woman had to be twenty-five, younger than her which stung. Maybe another reason why Dean told her to leave was because she was too old. Thirty isn't too old right? It's older than Dean but only by two years. Maybe he liked younger women. Well apparently by the looks of her. She looked even younger than twenty-five. She had long wavy brown hair, a flawless face, and a perfect body. Maybe that's what Dean wanted. Not a tall thin, too nice too affectionate woman. But a woman that was the perfect height, with perfect curves, and a stripper. She had to be. Which was worse for Izzie because strippers beat doctors. What sounded more desirable? A hot woman in a bra and thong molesting a pole or a pretty woman that deals with blood, guts, and drama all day? So much for being perfect and in love.
Izzie gave herself props though. She ignored the sobs building within her, blinked back the tears, and just let out a tiny, heartbroken, defeated sigh. She didn't even look at Dean as she turned around and headed for the door. She didn't want to see his face. She grabbed her keys off the table by the door and then yanked it open, one foot out when she heard in a choked voice that stopped her in her tracks, "I'm sorry, Izzie."
She stopped breathing. Her fingers tightened on the doorknob and she almost...almost turned back. But then she remembered there was a half naked woman in his room and she didn't. "I... I didn't mean for things to get like this Izzie... I'm so fucking sorry." She didn't know if he was sorry for her finding out about the brunette or sorry he had led led her on and broken her heart. Either way it didn't matter. She would never forgive him. Without so much as a bitter and final goodbye she walked out the door. She walked out of Dean Winchester's life.
She got in her Honda and started it, ignoring the familiar hot tears trailing down her cheeks, and sped off towards... she didn't know. Maybe a change in scenery would help her broken heart. She only knew she was getting far, far away from Dean Winchester.