Forever Burning.
A mute hope production.
Damon Salvatore/Lexi Branson
Alright; this is just a little drabble that has been playing over and over within my mind and won't leave. -.- If you dislike the ship Dexi then do not read. No negative reviews, because they'll just be ignored. Everyone else, enjoy. (:
I do not own the vampire diaries; if I did, Stefan wouldn't be so grumpy, and Damon would win. All the time. :D
PROLOGUE.
What happens to men that kill? Well, when you're an immortal, you don't really care what happens. But what happens if you kill for the wrong reasons? Does it play up and hurt you constantly? Does the victims face appear in your sleep? Do you constantly hear there last breath? It looked, as if for the first time in a long time; I was feeling guilt.
Guilt, had never been my thing. For as long as I can remember, I had been emotionless. Cruel and dangerous. I didn't want, need or ask for feelings. I didn't want to feel anything. After the thought of losing her. Then, finding out I had to wait over a hundred years to see her perfect face again. Time changes people. More than what is possible to the human eye. I, even though I disliked to admit, was a slow dying flower. I was corrupting with each second that passed. And one moment, it was all going to blow up in my face. Only a matter of time before my walls came in about me. Before I became a wreak. Just like my brother. The reason for my anger, annoyance and hate towards all things living and non. I, wanted to die. I wanted to join Katherine. And yes, if it wasn't for him; I wouldn't of found out about Katherine being stuck within the tomb. (Well, supposedly.) I wouldn't of known of the chance to see her again. I owed him that, but that was all. And quite frankly, I didn't care. I wanted nothing to do with my brother. I wanted his life, and his soul to be in pain. I didn't want to be breathing the same air as him. To me, Stefan was dead. And I mean, truly dead.
But, Stefan, nor Katherine was the reason for my sudden rush of guilt. Yes, I still had one thing to look forward too. Getting Katherine out of the tomb. To be happy again. And leave Stefan with his oh-so-needing girlfriend, Elena. But, did I deserve to be happy? After what I had done? I'd admit to anyone I disliked my brother. More than 'life' itself. But, perhaps I had taken it a bit too far? There was the small chance of it. Though, I had told myself over and over that it was part of the plan. To get the humans off our back. To 'show' them we too were human. Not that a little white lie could hurt anyone. But this? Killing his best friend? Making him lose the only person who understood him in the most darkest times. Alexia, or Lexi as she is called. Well, was called. She, had stuck by Stefan threw thick and thin. She had helped him at my request. And how did I repay her? By shoving a stake threw her heart.
But why now? Why was I feeling sick with myself. Usually, I could gaze into the mirror and feel great about myself. Now? The simple glance at the monster within causes my insides to twist. I didn't like this feeling. I didn't like any feelings. But this one, wouldn't leave. It was there, all the time. From the moment her breath had left her mouth. Asking me why. I would never forget the look on her face. The hurt, pain and sorrow all thriving within one true angel. I had killed many people before, and thought nothing of it. I had never felt anything like this after taking a life. Hell, if killing was a sport, I'd win the gold. But taking Lexi's life? Why was I feeling like this? Why was I disgusted with myself? Just plain down why? What made her so special to cause me to feel? But that was the thing. I knew why. I've always known why. I just never found it within myself to speak up. Katherine might have been the love of my life, but it didn't mean you couldn't love two people. Katherine, wasn't the first woman I had loved. She was the second. Nor, was she the first vampire I had loved. Lexi was. She would forever be. Lexi, saved me from death. Both her and I knew of my feelings to her. But that was the reason for my dislike to her. From the moment I set eyes on Lexi, back in 1863 when she saved me was when I fell in love with her. Ever wonder why I ran off- apart from wanting to get away from my brother-? It was to find her. Setting eyes on her, I was stunned. She, was helping my brother now. Katherine, was my best bet. I knew then, that Katherine would be the only one for me. Even if I wanted Lexi also. I, had killed the woman I adored. The woman I watched for over one hundred and forty five years. I had watched her. Admired her. And loved her each moment I had been free. Yes, my love for Katherine was stronger, but Lexi held something that I wished I had. She held respect, lust and beauty. She, was heaven. She knew all the right moves, and how to handle things. Lexi made me look like a wreak. Though I held myself with strength and respect, she brought out the worst in me. The one thing I thought was gone forever. My humanity. And now, just like Lexi; it was gone.
A/N;;
R&R? Tell me what you think, and if I should/Shouldn't carry on with this? Much thanks.