I sat in my study, papers surrounding me. It was my newest ideas on mutation, how it worked, the probability of genes in each parental line. Basically, it was my latest attempt to rid Raven out of my thoughts, to almost deafen the voices blasting their suffering in my mind.
I heard a knock on my door, causing me to put my fingertips to my forehead and give a sigh. "Hank!" I called, listening to yet another knock.
He bounded down the stairs, his eyes searching for me and finding my pen scribbling on the paper. 'He's still trying to lose her,' he thought quietly before opening the door.
The unheard rain now dripped into my ears along with Hank's astonished voice. "Raven?"
"Is Charles here?" a soft voice asked, reaching me in a way that no human could; mainly because she wasn't human. But even the least humane part of her was more than humanity could ever think of giving me.
I moved my chair away from my desk, eventually reaching the ramp I owned in my study from after the incident. My chair's wheels climbed the ramp slowly, revealing her figure when I finally made it out of the room. "Raven…" I whispered, my eyes collecting the droplets that fell off of her.
"May I speak with him alone?" she asked, her attention on Hank to be sure he knew but still being gentle in the way she asked. He nodded and motioned to the stairs with his thumb, his awkward form following the path without another word.
Raven turned to me, her blonde hair melting into red, her white skin seemingly flipping over to uncover her true blue skin. She walked the rest of the way to me, her bright yellow eyes searching my blue ones. "I was thinking about what you said. About me coming home…" She swallowed heavily, her mind scattered with things to say.
As I exited her mind, I nodded, reaching for her hand. "You still can. The offer will always be open. Always," I repeated, just to know that she heard that she would never be turned away from me.
"Thank you," she replied quietly, her breathing shaking slightly. Her hand found mine, the small scales on the side of her thumb on the top of my hand.
"Is something wrong?" I observed her, the way she stood, and watched as her eyes brought a closure to any emotion she might have been feeling. "We've known each other since we were children. I may not know what you're thinking but I don't have to be in your mind to know that something is bothering you."
She sighed, frustration tainting it with a small touch. "What would it matter, Charles? It's not like we can fix things to the way they were." She looked away from me; she was determined to keep what was behind her flaxen gaze.
"Well, not in the beginning, but one day, through time, there's a chance." Her head turned back to me, the wall inside her slowly falling. "But that doesn't mean you have to shut me out," I added, my undeniable hope that I had in her showing through my words.
Her auroral eyes flickered to my study and she gave a silent nod to it as if it were a question. My reply was a small smile, giving her the answer she had been seeking. She dropped my hand, walking gracefully into the room and to the couch. I followed behind her, reminded of it being the same couch that I would read to her in, remember her in, drink to forget her in.
I finally made my way to the side of the couch, realization hitting me when I remembered my struggle without my treatment and without Hank. I was still lost in my own theories on how to move out of my chair when I heard her ask, "Will you read to me?"
I laughed softly, smiling as I somewhat quoted some of myself that found me easily ten years earlier. "I only have my thesis to read." I motioned to my desk, proceeding to lift myself from the chair and turning forcibly with the help of my palms. I gave a soft grunt, eventually landing on the couch.
Raven returned with my notes, admiration in her eyes. "I thought you were still taking your treatment?"
"No, no," I replied, shaking my head and leaving my arm on top of the cushion. She settled at my side, handing the papers to my empty, but expectant, hand. "I stopped in case someone came along. Someone who might need my help." My eyes fell to hers, her once fearful voice booming in my mind.
"Use your powers, Charles. Stop him," she had said, her wide eyes set on the gun pointing at her.
"He can't," Erik answered for me, sending her running away from me once again. I had screamed for her afterward, my anger against him causing my blood to boil. What right did he have to take her from me?
I was yanked from my thoughts as Raven's hand touched my cheek. Her blue skin began to disappear slowly with the flipping of scales, the blonde hair she had pictured for herself slowly taking her redlocks by a similar storm that raged on outside.
"Raven, what are you-?" I began, confused to why she wanted to be in disguise again.
"Just read to me," she requested again, her head moving to my shoulder as I began to read.
"As many of my lectures, I will be discussing mutation. But today, unlike my other lectures, it will be about mutation that is inevitable inside of you, inside of us." I felt as though I was in front of the crowd of students, both mutant and not, that had once consumed me.
Raven pulled a blanket over us, staying quiet as I explained blood types, hair types, and how it all tied in to the possibility of a powerful being that would be born. I also clarified how I came to be, how my parents were normal to the world but the genes inside them were perfect for what I could do.
Every so often, a chuckle would arise at my side. I finally shifted my gaze from my thesis to her, a chuckle in my own voice. "What on Earth is so funny?"
"Who are you going to say this to, Charles?" She smiled a kind but knowing smile.
"Well after things blow over, I was thinking of going back to before the missile crisis, to actually put my degree to use. I'm just so tired of being useless and surrounded by books I've already read," I admitted, sighing. I could feel the tension that grew in her back; she resented what I was saying with every fiber of her being.
"Why? It's not like you can turn back the clock," she said in a hushed-scolding tone.
"I'm useless here, Raven. I drink, I write things no one will ever read, I sleep sometimes, if I'm lucky! I just want purpose again, to have a place amongst everyone else."
"I know what it's like, but there's got to be anything better than crawling back to the human world. Almost anything. Don't you remember, Charles?"
"What is so wrong with it? People praise God that you, a mutant, saved the President's life. They know the difference now. They know the mutants like us." I emphasized "us" to let her know that I still thought of her as good, even with all the lives she had taken in vengance.
"Doesn't mean they'll stop killing us," Raven shot back, standing up and moving away from the couch. Anger rose in her, the fierce fire in her vibrant blue eyes appearing again.
"Trask's program lost all funding. He has nothing left to hurt us or kill us with."
"And private funding? What about that?" Her anger let her guard down, enabling me to give the effect that I was standing up. Her eyes followed my movements, her upper lip still turned up into a small snarl.
"Raven," I whispered, my projection moving towards her with a small step. "When will you learn that not everyone is like Trask and Stryker? That people can be good to those they don't understand?" My projection's thumb touched her chin, the index finger moving under her chin; and although the projection was touching her, giving the illusion of my hands, I felt warmth in my fingers.
"But they are," she whispered, her eyes fighting to find the real me.
"Not anymore. I swear to it." I let my projection fade away slowly, Raven taking the opportunity to step through it and blow its remains away.
"And if it still continues?"
"Then I won't stop you. I will try to convince you that violence will lead to nothing but destruction of everything. I will even to to convince you that you can show them a better path because you have it in you to do it. But I won't force you to stay or to not follow through with your plans." She sat down again, sighing in relief.
I flickered my gaze away, craving my liquor once again, the soothing comfort of a freshly washed glass in my grasp. I was promising to let her slip through my fingertips again, as she had so many times before. She must've seen the look in my eyes, the damage that reigned in my features.
"I won't leave," Raven announced softly but simply, turning my head to look at her. "I don't want to leave like I did before."
"I believe you, but I… When last I saw you, I almost thought you would come with me. Yet you turned away. I don't how to trust you again, despite the years between us. There was once a time when no one was closer than you and I. But then things changed. How do I know that it won't happen again?"
"Because you can go into my mind and-" she began, but was cut off by my lips pressing together.
"I've broken that promise four times now, Raven," I mentioned. I sighed, closing my eyes for a moment before opening them. "I won't do that until you tell me to. Then, and only then,will I read your mind."
Her sapphire eyes sparkled slightly, her belief in my promise full. It was as though I could see into her thoughts again without having to be in her mind. She smiled softly and reached behind beyond me, grabbing a slightly dusted thesis of before I had gained my degree.
"Isn't this?" Raven started, holding it for me to see. With the stroke my thumb across the title and a small smile in reminiscence, she opened it and began to read. She moved so that her back was against my side again, and my tilted body formed to hers as though we were a mold being completed. My cheek rested against her head as I listened, mouthing the words as her lips did.
The arm that rested on the top of the cushion moved so it was around her, my hand resting over hers. Slowly, her fingers spread, my own overtaking the spaces newly opened. There was a twinge of a smile that sketched itself into my mouth and by the way she read, I could tell she shared it.
She read on, the lightning flashing into the room from the window. And as she turned the page, I kissed the side of her head, like I had so many years ago, and closed my eyes. And bit by bit, her voice carried me to the first peaceful sleep that I had experienced in twelve years.