Author's Note: I thought the pray-off was disappointing so I decided to write a retelling of the chapter, but with a slightly more satisfying conclusion. With that said, feel free to look up on "Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles )" by proudhousewife, one of the greatest trollfics I have ever read. It's a shame that it didn't continue for at least another few chapters.
One night at the pray-off, Harry and Draco got down on their knees and raise their hands to the sky.
"I'll go first, because God loves me best," Draco declared confidently. With that, he shouted, "Dear Lord, if you agree with me that women are stupid and Potter is wrong, please strike him down where he kneels."
Unbeknownst to Draco, Harry secretly made a mental prayer to counter Draco's, thus resulting in a lightning to strike the spot right next to where Draco is. Angered at this, Draco then yell, "Why Lord? Why did you try to attack me? You love me right? You love me better than Harry!"
"Tell me, you didn't have a new favorite did you? I swear to god you better not god!" Draco continues to yell.
At that point, Harry thought about making his move that involves Draco getting struck down in where he stands, but then a sense of mercy begins to flow through his body like blood through the veins. Having thought better of it, Harry then raise his hands far higher than Draco's had been and soon, a bright flash of light envelops god's favorite and in place of Harry stands a forty meter silver titan in a tight outfit with lines that made it looked as if he's wearing a thong. Not only that, the titan's wearing a bracelet on his left wrist!
Shocked, Hermione runs behind Dean Thomas in fright.
Ron moans as he watches Hermione runs to hide behind a black kid.
"I was going to hide behind him." Ron moans.
Dean Thomas then said "Damn!" in a highly intelligent manner which is impressive because he's black. Not to mention, it should be noted that Dean Thomas had come a long way ever since his father made a mistake of wandering in St. Louis during the middle of the night while dressed up like one of the members of N.W.A. To make the matters worse, couple of police officers mistook his half-eaten bar of Snickers for an AK-47. After dozens of clips were emptied into his body, miraculously, the man survived though not for long as one of the cops then drags him to the curb and told him to bite down, after that...well, you know the rest of the story.
Shocked by the sight, Draco then screams.
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME LORD? YOU HAVE HIM THE HOLY POWER TO TRANSFORM INTO THIS? LOOK AT HIM, HE'S A FAG!"
"I THOUGHT YOU HATED FAGS! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"
Ultraman Jack then shakes his head before putting Draco out of his misery by stepping on him.
A second later, Harry suddenly wakes up and begins to look around to see Ginny fast asleep right next to him.
"What a weird dream." he thought.