… "And he plans to put the whole world under a genjutsu using the moon as a focal point. He only needs..."
"That's stupid," Naruto said as he crossed his arms.
Gaara stopped and looked at him. "What do you mean?"
"I mean, it's a really stupid plan. What's he gonna do during the day?" It seemed like the most obvious thing in the world to him. He looked around. Everyone was looking at him like he'd started taking off his clothes and rubbing his body with snow. He frowned, his tone becoming defensive.
"What? Why are you all looking at me like that? Am I the only one who sees the flaw in this?"
"Naruto..." And Kakashi's voice was careful and almost gentle, like he was explaining something to a small child. "I'm sure that Madara has thought of this, and..."
"No, I don't think he has." He paused, furrowing his brow. "I mean, I'm not an expert in genjutsu, but they wear off after a while. Even Itachi's torture-time didn't last all that long, and that's like, one of the most powerful."
Sai smacked the back of his head. "Oww..." He glared. "What the hell was that for?"
Sai jabbed his thumb at Kakashi.
Naruto stared at his sensei blankly for a few seconds before perking up.
"Oh." Then his eyes widened. "Right. The whole, uh, torture genjutsu thing. Sorry, sensei, I didn't mean to trivialize that." He rubbed the back of his neck, sending a suspicious look at Sai. Since when does Sai know anything about how real people act?
"It's all right, Naruto." He turned back to Gaara. "Now, what else happened at this meeting?"
As Gaara started to speak, something else occurred to Naruto.
"Hell, what's he going to do on cloudy nights? Or if it rains at night? Or during the winter?" He snapped his fingers. "Oh! And what happens during an eclipse? Does that cancel everything? He didn't mention anything about that, did he?"
Gaara's eyebrow twitched. "No, Naruto."
"Hmm. Well, that was fairly short-sighted of him. Did they have astronomy back when Madara was young? Maybe he doesn't know about these things."
"Naruto," And Kakashi's voice sounded strained. "I think it would be best if we just stood quietly and let Gaara finish."
He waved his hand. "Fine. Fine. Whatever." He looked at Gaara expectantly.
"All right. Danzou also surprised us all. Apparently, he has access to..."
"And what if you're on a boat, and you look at the reflection of the moon in the water? Does that double the genjutsu, or something? I mean, if you're already under the genjutsu and you just keep looking at it, is it like looking into the sun? I wonder..."
But Naruto was cut short as sand bound his hands and feet and covered his mouth, causing him to fall into the snow. He struggled against the bonds, but the sand just constricted, making it difficult for him to breath.
"Mmmmphh." He managed to make that sound before looking straight at Gaara's face and stilling. He'd only seen that expression at the Chuunin exams, right as Gaara was getting ready to crush his opponents into a bloody splatter against the earth.
"No. More. Interruptions." He said it quietly, and from several feet away, but as far as Naruto was concerned, Gaara might as well have been shouting the words into his ear. He just nodded rapidly.
Gaara's face relaxed and he continued to talk. Everyone forgot that Naruto was lying on the ground, in the snow, with sand going up his nose every time he breathed in. His eyes narrowed.
Stupid Madara. Stupid moon. This is what I get for paying attention when Iruka explained how the solar system worked. Then he glared at everyone around him. I saved all their asses from Pain and this is how they repay me. Well, let Madara have his crummy moon plan. We'll see who's laughing during an eclipse. Feeling a sudden sensation of cold and wet along his legs and back, and noticing that his feet had gone numb, Naruto glumly thought it wouldn't be him.
This has probably already been done before, and occurred to a lot of people, but I re-read those chapters and had a sudden urge to point it out. If you've heard this before, I still hope it gave you at least a chuckle.