I ran into George's office high on coffee a month after the car accident. Fully recovered I now lived everyday like it was my last. George jumped seeing me run in handing him a paper. He glanced at it then he looked at me jumping around with energy.
"Ah Sara, how much coffee have you had?"
"I just drank my fourteenth cup, why."
"I think you should lay off awhile." He said, handing me back the paper. "It looks good."
"Thank's. I have Brass looking for the suspect right now." I said, fast.
He nodded watching me run out again. I ran to the garage seeing Sophia working on the car that we found with the victim in it. She watched me snatch some luminal from the table as I walked over spraying the back seat.
"No blood." I said "Well why wouldn't there be, he didn't die back here."
"Sara, you are driving me crazy!" Sophia said
I looked at her.
"What?"
"You have been talking to yourself all shift." She said, sighing.
"Sorry." I said
Rubbing her head she looked down again hearing me whispering to myself.
"Your doing it again."
"I am just going over the case."
"What is wrong with you?"
"Nothing." I said, walking over to the other side.
Grissom came in seeing us still working an hour later. Sophia walked over looking back at me then at him.
"You have to do something about Sara."
"What's wrong?"
"She is full of coffee and she keeps talking to herself."
Grissom looked over at me as I stood by a table looking at tire pieces. He walked over hearing me softly talking to myself.
"How's it going?" He asked
"Great, fine…well not fine….it's an ongoing process." I said
"Good." He said, watching my hands shake as I reached over to touch a piece of tire. "Your shaking."
I lifted my hand up looking at it then I dropped it working again.
"I'm fine."
His hand touched my back as he leaned in close to my ear.
"Honey, take it easy and try to get along with everyone."
"I am."
He kissed my head then walked out. I watched him go then I eyed Sophia as she walked past me to work on the car.
Brass rubbed his tired face as he walked over to the CSI part of the building. He went over the shift events shaking his head to get rid of them. Grissom walked out of his office seeing him walking over.
"I am all in." Brass said
"You look it."
"I've been up for forty eight hours." He said, as he rubbed his face again yawning.
"I think Sara will crash soon as well." Grissom said "I've never seen her so jittery."
"I have once, but coffee had nothing to do with it."
Brass walked by as Grissom watched him go. Inside he worried about my behavior wondering if the memory of the car accident was affecting me. We came home and I was still wound up. Grissom watched me walk over to the couch in the living room turning on the TV. My leg shook as I relaxed. Grissom walked over sitting down next to me after ordering take out. He touched my leg making it stop.
"Sara, you need to cut down on the coffee."
"I know."
"I mean it." He said, looking at me with his boss face.
"Okay." I said, annoyed.
I felt his hand leave my knee as he got up. Turning he looked back seeing my leg moving again. We ate and then had some soothing tea. He slept as I paced around the room feeling tense. An hour before shift he found me on the couch lying on my stomach sleeping. He leaned over moving my hair from my face causing me to move to my side facing the couch.
"Sara."
"Huh?" I said
"You need to get up."
I groaned moving lying back down again.
"I want to sleep."
"You have to pay the price for the coffee intake. Come on get up."
I slowly got up glaring at him as I put my hand through my hair. George walked in the break room seeing me sitting in a chair holding my head with my hand looking like death. He grabbed water from the fridge walking over to me.
"Sara, are you okay?"
"Fine." I said
"When is your break over with?" He asked, checking his watch.
"In a minute okay!" I said
"Get back to work."
I stood looking at him mad. He watched me leave muttering to myself as I walked down the hallway.
Sophia watched me walk in to the lab snapping on my gloves as I threw things around on the table beside her.
"What's with you?" She asked
"I don't want to talk about it!" I said
"Bad night?" She asked
I sighed looking at her.
"Sophia, what does I don't want to talk about it mean to you?"
She stared at me as I glared at her finally looking down at her work as I went to work. Brass looked up as I entered his office slumping down in a chair looking down.
"I feel like everyone is after me tonight."
"I heard you were on a war path." He said
Sighing, I rubbed my head closing my eyes.
"Headache?"
Nodding I opened my eyes seeing him reach into his desk drawer throwing an aspirin bottle with pills inside.
"Thank's." I said, taking out two then throwing them back.
He watched me stand to leave. I looked at him watching as he motioned me over to him taking my hand kissing it making me smile.
"Tell Grissom he needs to get you home to sleep or I will deal with him."
"I will."
"Okay."
Grissom leaned against the car waiting for me to come out to go home. I walked out seeing him.
"Ready?" He asked
"I guess."
He pulled me to him kissing me. His hand came to my cheek as he searched my eyes.
"Sara, I need to ask you something. Are you having trouble sleeping because of the car accident?"
I moved back looking at him weird.
"No, why would I?"
"I don't know, maybe you are afraid."
"No, I am fine."
"Then honey, why can't you sleep?"
I looked down sighing.
"You can tell me."
I looked at him.
"Grissom, nothing is wrong."
"Okay." He said, standing.
I went to the passenger side door getting in seeing him looking at me then start the car. Grissom moved in bed feeling my side was empty. He got up going out to the living room finding me sleeping at the computer desk. He looked at the screen seeing that I was looking up my family history. Brass's name was highlighted and underlined showing his family background. Grissom reached down touching my head. I jumped moving seeing him.
"Sara, come to bed."
"I was working on something." I said, rubbing my eyes.
"That can wait."
I surrendered to him going to bed. Nick and Greg were in the lab the next shift looking at some crime scene pictures as I walked in seeing them.
"Hey." I said
"Hey Sara, can you help a minute?" Nick asked
"What is it?"
"Can you look at these pictures and tell us what this is on the floor?" He asked
I walked over stopping seeing a grisly sight. My memories hit me like a ton of bricks as I saw a man on the couch lying dead with knife marks all over. Blood sprayed the walls and the floor. I backed away from them trying to breathe.
"Sara, you okay?" Greg asked
I shook my head running out of the room. Greg looked at Nick. I slid down outside the building where no one could see me as I held myself hyperventilating. Everything came back even the memory of my mother being taken away. Holding my head I tried to let go.
Greg walked around looking for me when he saw George.
"Hey, have you seen Sara?"
"No, why?"
"Nick asked her to look at some pictures and she just freaked out running out of the room."
"I'll look for her." George said, looking around as well.
My phone went off as I laid my head back against the wall with my eyes closed ignoring the phone. George looked at his phone dialing another number. Brass walked out knowing where I was. He walked over sitting down beside me.
"This is a nice spot you have here."
I looked down not speaking.
"Want to tell me why we are out here?"
I moved closer to him letting him put his arm over my shoulders.
"My mom killed….my dad."
"I didn't know that. I'm sorry."
"I was a little girl and when I saw those pictures it looked just like the scene at my house."
"That must have traumatized you."
"I didn't think I was, but I am."
He kissed my head as I laid my head on his shoulder.
"What if I kill Grissom?"
"You are not your mother, Sara. Something made her snap. I have seen you angry, but never that angry. The difference is you don't let that anger get out of control."
"I told him about my past and he said the same thing."
"Great men think alike." He said
I smiled touching his brown tie.
"You have my blood in you and that changes everything."
We both looked up seeing Grissom appear. He looked at us both as he held his phone in one hand.
"Hello Gil." Brass said
"Hello, is there a problem?"
"No, just bonding."
"I see. Could this bonding wait until shift is over?"
"I think everything is all right now." Brass said, as he stood helping me up. "Well I think I have some work to do."
He walked away leaving Grissom and I alone.
"What is going on?" He asked
"I had a panic attack."
"What brought it on?"
"It's fine now."
"Sara, I asked a question."
I sighed walking over to him.
"I saw some pictures that reminded me of the scene at my house."
"I see."
He watched me come closer kissing him.
"I don't want to push you away, but sometimes the memories pop up and it may seem like I am bothered by something I really work it out myself."
"Okay, I understand as long as you do not drink anymore."
"I won't."
He touched my cheek then took my hand leading me back to the building.
We slept in bed together finally able to relax. I moved to my other side laying my head and arm on his chest. He woke hearing me snore gently making him sigh as he tried to sleep.
He got up leaving me to sleep taking over his side as I laid across the bed tangled in the covers. When he came back in dressed carrying a cup of coffee he chuckled because I was half hanging off the bed. Sitting down gently he put the cup down letting the smell hit my nose. I slowly lifted my head sitting up with my head hanging down.
"Coffee?" He asked
"Mmm." I said, reaching out to feel for it. He gave the cup to me and I looked inside seeing a small amount at the bottom. He watched me look at him.
"You have to cut down."
"Grissom, I can't work without coffee. Go in there and fill his up." I said, handing him the cup.
"Sara, you agreed to cut down."
I groan giving him back the cup as I laid back on the bed.
"I hate you."
"No you don't." He said, standing going into the next room. I put my hand on my head looking up at the ceiling.
My hunger for coffee became my main obsession at work. I walked into the break room eyeing George standing beside the pot holding a full cup as he read an article from a magazine he was holding. I walked over looking back to the hallway then I inched my way over seeing the large paper cups to hold double the coffee. My mouth watered as I reached for the cup seeing George look at me.
"Break time already?"
"No, this is Sara is going to kill someone if she does not get some coffee in her." I said, pouring some out into the cup.
George laughed moving away. I put the cup to my nose smelling the wonderful scent inside. I sipped it winching then I blew on it taking a longer sip. Closing my eyes I felt the coffee move around inside. A clearing of a throat made me open my eyes seeing Grissom holding a folder looking at me with interest from the doorway.
I coughed putting the cup behind me as he walked over.
"I see you are enjoying yourself." He said
"Not really." I said, looking down.
"Is that your first cup tonight?"
"Yes."
"I have to go to a meeting with the sheriff."
I nodded looking at him watching as he smiled walking away. I grabbed my cup walking out quickly.
A week later I was sent out on a solo job driving to a house among look alike houses in a row the only difference was that one had police cars in front of it. I got out of the car getting my case walking up the sidewalk seeing Brass looking at me sad.
"There is a woman inside shot in the head."
"Okay." I said, walking ahead knowing he was following me. We went in seeing the woman at the bottom of some stairs in the entry way. She was looking with lifeless eyes to the right. I stopped gasping seeing that the woman looked just like me.
"Sometimes this stuff gets to real." Brass said, as he stood beside me looking down.
"She looks just like me."
He put his hand on my back.
"You okay?"
"Yeah, it's just…." I said
We stood there staring for a moment.
"I'll be outside." He said, leaving. I sighed, setting down my case getting out flashlight shining it on the woman looking at her. As David and his men took her away I walked around the upstairs looking a photos on the wall.
"You must have been really happy." I said, out loud.
Jumping I heard noise in the closet. Getting my gun out I carefully moved over to the door. My breathing was the only thing I heard. My hand went to the doorknob when it was flung open by a large man. I fell to the ground dropping my gun. He straddled me licking my shoulder as I clawed for my gun.
"You like the rough stuff?" I asked, as he breathed fast. I turned kneeing him and he got off me groaning. Getting away I grabbed my gun before he pushed me against the wall and we struggled for the gun. Brass walked to the clumps of people waiting to be questioned when a gunshot made him stop and run to the house with two other cops. He ran up the stairs gun in his hand quietly walking down the hallway. I stood shaking as the man laid on the ground shot in the shoulder. Brass came in looking at me then the man.
"He jumped out of the closet." I said, handing my gun to Brass. One of the cops leaned down touching the man neck.
"He's alive."
"Get him out of here." Brass said
I watched them take him out then I felt Brass hug me.
"It's okay." He said
I put my arms around him shaking still.
"Your all right."
I nodded tightening my hold on him. He moved back putting his hands on my cheeks looking at me.
"I'm okay." I said
He nodded pulling me back against him. Taking a shower at work was my first priority. I stood under the hot spray holding myself. The curtain came open scaring me as Grissom stood there.
"I heard what happened." He said
"Yeah, I figured you would." I said, looking down.
He continued to stand there as I looked over at him.
"Is that all you have to say?" He asked
"It's over, I am all right."
He nodded letting his eyes go down my body then up to my eyes.
"If you want to talk I will in my office."
"Thank's." I said
He closed the curtain leaving me alone to my thoughts. Dressing I worked on the case hearing that the man I shot was all right. After shift I made my way to my husband's office seeing him behind his desk on the phone. He talked as he watched me close the door sitting in a chair looking around then at him. Hanging up he threw his pen down on the desk sitting back in his chair looking at me.
"George want's you off the case."
"I knew he would."
"I heard that the victim looks like you."
I nodded looking to the side.
"David showed me and I have to say it was….."
"Weird?"
"No…more like troubling."
"Who knew I would have a twin." I said
"How do you feel about that?"
"I was creeped out at first."
"That is understandable."
I nodded looking at him. Standing I smiled leaning down holding my head with my hands.
"You are very cute today."
He moved up to the desk in his chair.
"You are changing the subject."
"I am trying." I said, giving him a sweet smile.
He smiled looking over hearing a knock.
"Come in." He said, watching me stand and slump again in a chair. Brass opened the door seeing us.
"The creep that attacked you is under arrest at the hospital."
"Good." I said
"Gil, are we still going to eat at that diner?"
"Yes, if you want."
"What is going on?" I asked
"I asked Gil to spend some quality father in law time with me after work."
"Captain Jim Brass is my father in law." Grissom said, sitting back sighing. "I can't get used to that."
"I'll meet you outside." Brass said
I stood watching him wink at me then leave. Grissom stood up clearing his desk then he came around handing me the car keys.
"Your making me go home alone?" I asked, giving him a pouty face.
"Sorry."
"I think I'll have take out." I said excitedly.
"I am afraid to ask, but morbid curiosity makes me want to. This take out isn't going to be from the Vegetarian Hut is it?"
"Maybe." I said, opening the door.
He groaned thinking of the smell of broccoli and Brussel sprouts that would make the house smell for a few days. I kissed him then I went home.
He walked out seeing Brass standing jiggling his keys waiting by his car. Once they sat down and ordered Brass started to speak.
"How did your meeting go?" He asked
"The sheriff wants the Stevenson case closed within the next forty eight hours."
"George will be mad at that."
"I told him when I came out. He was livid." Grissom said, sighing.
"I'll bet." Brass said
Grissom looked outside as some people walked by. Brass thanked the waitress as she set down a coffee for him and tea for Grissom.
"Are you happy being back Gil?"
Grissom looked at him thinking about the answer.
"Yes, I am. Are you happy?"
"There were a lot of years that I was not happy, but now having Sara in my life I think I am to."
Grissom smiled as Brass sipped his coffee. The front door opened to our house as Grissom came in smelling the food from the Vegetarian Hut. I ran over to him as he closed the door he turned feeling me push him against the door.
"Hello Doctor Grissom." I said, smiling.
"Hello." He said
"You need to give me the secret word to get past."
"Please?"
I laughed leaning over kissing him. He kissed me slowly then moved away.
"I taste alcohol in your mouth." He said
I backed away looking at him.
"Did you drink?"
"I had a beer."
"Just one?" He asked
"Yes, you really are not good at being seduced." I said, walking to the living room. He walked over seeing me sitting in a chair.
"Sara, why did you drink a beer?"
I glanced at him before standing going to the kitchen counter taking a folded letter out of an envelope handing it to him. He looked at it reading.
"It's from your mother." He said, looking at me.
I pointed to a spot he should read. He looked down then he looked at me.
"Brass wrote to her?"
"Yes." I said
"Did you know he would?"
"No."
Grissom read the rest of the letter then he gave it back to me.
"She has always been mad that I loved the man I thought was my father more than her. Now I have a real dad and she still is mad."
He reached out touching my arm.
"I am a grown woman and I still care what my mother thinks."
"Sara, you are a grown woman, but you're never to old to be hurt. You have to move on."
I nodded looking down. He lifted my head with his hand kissing me. I dropped the letter putting my arms around him feeling him pick me up then take me to the bedroom.
The lab hit a dry spell which drove me crazy. While the others worked on some theft scenes I was put on standby which meant standing around waiting. I decided to go to the police station and see Brass. As I rounded the corner I saw Ellie Brass standing by his office door looking nervously around.
"Ellie?" I said, watching as she turned seeing me.
"Your Sara aren't you?" She asked
"Yes."
"Dad told me about you." She said, looking me up and down.
"He must have gone somewhere. Do you want to grab a coffee?"
"You like him don't you?"
"What?"
"My dad, you like him."
"Yes I do."
She faced me holding her coat up to her chest.
"I grew up without him. When he did come home he drank."
"I'm sorry."
"Everyone feels sorry for me. Now you came around becoming his daughter. Where does that leave me?"
"Ellie, you're his daughter still."
She made a sound looking around.
"You know what? You can keep him all to yourself!" She shouted, walking away.
I watched her leave stopping as Brass appeared looking at her.
"Hello Ellie."
She looked at me then at him.
"Looks like you got the daughter you always wanted."
"What?" He asked, watching her run out. I walked over as he looked at me confused.
I followed him in his office sitting in a chair as he sat behind his desk.
"Maybe I can talk to her." I said
"No, just leave it. She always comes back wanting money."
He sighed, sitting back in his chair looking down.
"I got a letter from my mom." I said
He looked at me.
"She was mad."
"I bet she was. I should have told you I was going to do that." He said
"It's okay." I said
A knock came at the door as Catherine popped her head in.
"Jim, we need you now."
"What's going on?"
"A man in the parking lot is screaming."
Brass stood getting his gun walking out with her as I followed. He got two officers and walked to a side door. I heard the man as I neared the front entrance seeing Greg and Nick standing looking at him from the curb.
George walked over looking out beside me. He opened the door going out to talk to the man.
"No one will help me!" He cried, as he paced around the lot.
"I'll help you if I can." George said
The man looked over at George holding his head and seeing he had a machete.
"Help me!" He shouted
"I can but you have to tell me how." George said, seeing Brass and his men coming forward inch by inch holding their guns.
Grissom came over to where I was looking out.
"Sara, stay in here." He said, as he went out.
My heart started racing as I realized that there was a chance that both the men I loved could get hurt. I opened the door knowing that Grissom would be furious, but I had to try to help. I walked out seeing Greg and Nick looking back at me. Grissom had joined George who were trying to gain the man's attention.
"This is crazy." I said
"Yeah." Nick said
The man began shouting again as he raised his knife.
"Put the machete down!" Brass ordered
The man turned looking at them.
"Just put it down!"
"They told me to use it!" The man said
"I don't want to shoot you."
Grissom and George stayed as they were as the man turned looking at them.
"You are all animals!"
"Put it down!" Brass yelled again.
"I will kill you all!" He yelled, raising the machete running at George and Grissom. Shots rang out and the man screamed falling to the ground. I put my hand to my chest taking a breath as they all walked over carefully to the fallen man.
Grissom got his phone out calling someone. He walked over to where Greg and Nick stood seeing me standing beside them.
"You guys go back to work."
"Is he dead?" Greg asked
Grissom nodded looking back then he looked at me. I followed them inside knowing a lecture was coming. My hand shook as I lifted my cup of coffee to my lips in the break room.
I sat down seeing people walking around then I saw Grissom walking seeing me he turned coming in. I listened as he sighed looking down at me.
"I know." I said "I will listen next time and I love you to…..pookie."
"That is not going to work this time. There are so many things I want to say about not listening when I ask you to do something."
"I would love to hear them, but I think George wanted to see me." I said, standing.
"Sara, I am your husband and when I say stay I mean it. It's not to spoil your fun it's to keep you alive!"
"Okay." I said "I promise I will listen to you."
He looked at me still mad.
"We will talk more when we get home."
"I look forward to it."
He walked out as I sat down on the couch sighing. When we got home I went in and changed skipping food I went right to sleep as he ate then came to bed. When we woke up he kissed me and I knew we were okay again.
The cases started to heat up and I got one with George. We drove to the house getting the low down from Brass then went inside to inspect the scene. I walked carefully around to avoid stepping in the blood on the floor. There was a door that I thought led to the basement. Turning the knob I realized it was locked. George walked over as I knelt down picking the lock.
"Where did you learn that?" He asked, shining his light at the lock.
"I picked it up when I was ten." I said
I got it unlocked standing opening the door. George and I both shined lights in seeing something that made our hair stand up. Explosives, a lot of them.
"Ever been in an explosion?" I asked
"No." He said
"I have, it's not fun."
He got his phone out dialing. I looked up seeing a pipe bomb on the top shelf rolling a little.
"We need a bomb squad here as soon as possible."
I stared at that one pipe bomb as he turned off his phone looking inside.
"What is the plan?" I asked
"The plan is we get our butts out of here." He said
"Wait!" I said, as he took me by the arm.
"What?"
"That bomb is going to move when we do. If it falls we are finished."
"If we go slowly…."
"No, that won't work."
"Your not going to be a hero here are you?"
"You go on gently and I will follow."
"That makes no sense."
"Just go, I have a plan."
"I am not going without you."
"I got this."
"No, you don't." He said, pulling me away.
I looked shining my light at the closet seeing the pipe bomb moving. We got out the door running as we clutched our cases. Suddenly a wave of force hit us from the explosion picking us up throwing us down hard on the street as people screamed then nothing.
Sara!"
I heard someone shouting my name and coughing. A hand touched my neck as I arched my back coughing.
"Sara, can you hear me?"
I coughed lying on my side. Opening my eyes I saw Brass with a bloody cut on his head. He coughed as smoke was everywhere.
"Honey, are you okay? Is anything broken?" He asked
"No." I said, winching. "George?"
"He has a broken arm, but other than that he is fine." He said
I nodded watching him look over then at me. He helped me to sit up watching me winch.
"My side hurts." I said
He lifted my shirt then he looked around.
"I need an EMT!"
"Why?" I said, looking down seeing a blood stain spreading as a piece of wood was sticking out. "Oh."
The EMT's came with a stretcher putting me on it as they went back to the ambulance. Brass stood where he was watching as they put me inside closing the door. He got his phone out making a call.
I woke once again in the hospital in a bed looking around the room. My side had been bandaged as I felt the drugs working. I looked at the window to my left thinking about how I must be accident prone. The door opened as Brass came in with a basket of fruit and a large basket of some red flowers. I shook my head as he set them down on the table at the foot of the bed.
"Wow!" I said
"I thought you'd like them."
He walked over kissing my head as he smoothed my hair.
"You okay?"
"I think so."
"I think I age every time you are hurt."
"You don't look it."
He smiled lifting my hand.
"Grissom is in a meeting. He told me not to leave your side until he gets here."
I looked at him as he sat in a chair next to the bed still holding my hand. He looked around the room then he looked at me.
"You don't have to stay."
"Sara, your hurting my feelings. I want to stay."
"Sorry."
He took a breath as I moved my head feeling sleepy. I closed my eyes as he sat silently rubbing my fingers.
Grissom came in looking at me sleeping on the bed as Brass stood by the window looking out.
"How is she?" He asked
"Fine, the doctor's said she can go home tomorrow as long as she rest's." Brass said whispering.
The nurse came in giving me a new IV then she smiled at them leaving. I moved my head opening my eyes seeing that Brass was not there. Grissom walked over as Brass left kissing me.
"I am sorry for not being here."
"It's okay." I said, as he kissed my head.
He sighed looking at me as he let his finger go down my cheek.
"George said you were very brave."
"I was just doing my job."
"He is proud of you."
I smiled searching his face.
"So am I."
He kissed me again then he sat in the chair.
He took me home and with the help of the pills the pharmacy gave Grissom I was asleep all day and night. When he got home he tried to rouse me but I was dead to the world. When I did wake up my cell phone was ringing next to me. I slowly reached over grabbing it putting it to my ear as my face was in the pillow.
"Hello?" I said, muffled.
"Honey, are you awake?" Grissom asked, as he looked at a paper in the hallway.
"Mmmhmm." I said, moving my head to the side.
"I have some take out for you in the oven."
"Mmmhmm."
He sighed looking down the hallway.
"Can you talk to me in an intelligent way so I know you are all right?"
"What?"
He shook his head.
"Never mind, I will call later."
"Gris?"
"Yes, dear?"
"I am so happy we are together."
"That's the drugs talking. I am happy to. Bye."
He hung up looking at it a moment. I moved closing my eyes letting the phone fall to the floor. He came home early hearing the TV on.
"Sara?"
I came out of the kitchen looking sweaty and pale holding a pot.
"I was going to surprise you."
He walked over touching my head and cheeks.
"Sara, your supposed to be resting."
"I wanted to make you something."
He took the pot out of my hand's placing it on the counter then he took my hand leading me to the bedroom.
"I want you to lie down and I will make something." He said, pulling the blankets over my legs.
I put my hand to my face crying. He backed up in shock as I sobbed covering my face.
"Honey, what's wrong."
"I…I'm….such…a terrible….wife."
"No you're not." He said, sitting down touching my arms trying to look at me. I dropped my hands looking at him.
"Yes, I ….am!"
"No, you are perfect."
I shook my head looking down crying again. He smoothed my hair as I sniffed.
"You make me very happy." He said, as he touched my head again.
"You love me?" I asked, looking at him.
He leaned in kissing me then he touched my cheek.
"I couldn't love you anymore than I do."
I nodded sniffing. He got up getting a wash cloth wetting it before he sat down wiping my face. I laid back on the bed sniffing.
"Now I will make us something to eat and I want you to lay here and not move."
"Can I go lay on the couch?"
"Okay."
He helped me up and I went to the couch lying down. He fixed something and brought two dishes over to the couch. I sat up against some pillows as he handed me a plate. As I finished he took the plates to the kitchen loading the dishwasher then he came back with a glass of water and two pills for me to take.
"These again?" I said
"They are helping you heal." He said, handing them to me.
"By putting me in a coma?"
"Sara, I know you hate them, but for now they are helping the healing process."
I groaned putting them in my mouth drinking water. I handed him the water and he just sat there looking at me.
"What?"
"Open your mouth."
I opened it showing him inside.
"Tongue."
Lifting my tongue he saw the pills.
"Take them."
I sighed taking the water drinking then I showed him again. He nodded getting up to go to the kitchen. I laid back watching him lift my feet and sit down. He massaged my ankles as I looked over at the movie playing.
"I hate feeling loopy." I said
He nodded watching the TV. Soon I felt that feeling as the pills took effect. Grissom looked over at me seeing I was sleeping. He put a blanket over me turning off the TV. The next day I woke unable to move. Grissom had placed some juice and some crackers on a plate on the coffee table for me. I reached over getting the juice drinking some then I put it back looking at the crackers.
After a while I felt better getting up to do things around the house. A knock made me jump as I walked over seeing Brass standing outside holding a bag of something. I opened it seeing him smile lifting the bag.
"I brought food."
I let him come in smelling the aroma from the bag making me hungry. He set the bag on the counter taking out white containers.
"What is it?" I asked
"Chicken alfredo without chicken for you, and for me spaghetti and meatballs."
I opened mine seeing a large amount of noodles mixed in with alfredo sauce. He took out another container with breadsticks and salad.
"So how is your rest going?" He asked, as he pulled out a chair for me.
I carried my container over sitting down.
"I honestly don't know how people do it. I am dead to the world then when I wake up I am bored."
He nodded bringing over the other containers. I watched him go into the kitchen to get silverware and something to drink. He sat down eating.
"Well you are one of these people who like activity." He said, as he ate some meatball.
"That's true."
"When you have kids then it will change."
I looked at him.
"Kids? I don't think I could take that."
He smiled shaking his head looking down at his food.
"You would. Children change everything."
"I'm sorry, but the entire idea of babies makes me cringe."
"I thought that, and then Ellie came."
"Are you trying to telling me you want grandchildren?"
"Someday."
I watched him wink at me going back to his food. When Grissom came home I was sitting on the couch looking at my wedding ring.
He sat down beside me yawning.
"Hard day?" I asked
"You could say that." He said, leaning his head back as he closed his eyes.
I moved slowly to sit across him touching his face as he opened his eyes looking at me.
"Grissom, do you want children?"
"Children?"
"Yes."
"I don't know."
"Me either." I said
"Are you telling me that you are….?"
"No." I said, watching him take a long breath.
"I never thought of children."
"Dad brought it up today."
"Sara, if you want to have one we can think about it."
"I have and the truth is I like it being just us. Besides the prospect of maternity leave makes me sick."
"You wanted to know if I wanted one."
"Yes."
He leaned over kissing my neck gently as I closed my eyes.
"Let's keep that subject open for later."
"Okay."
"Now let's go to bed."
I returned to work a week later. The cases rolled in as if on a conveyer belt. None of us got much rest during the first three weeks I was there. One shift Sophia walked over to where I stood by the car waiting for George. She stood beside me smiling as she thought about something.
"So how are you?" I said
"Good, you?"
"Can't complain." I said
She nodded and we were silent again. George came out seeing us carrying his case.
"Well ladies I can promise this will be a night to remember." He said, walking past us to the car.
"How do you figure?" Sophia asked
"You will see. I had a hard time believing it to."
I shrugged my shoulders at Sophia as we got into the Tahoe. George parked outside a high school football stadium. We got out seeing the police walking around.
"Wait till you see this." Brass said, as we came towards him. He led us to the field and we stopped looking at four heads on poles and no bodies.
"Wow." I said
"Where are the bodies?" Sophia asked
"We don't know." Brass said
I walked over looking at the heads.
"What people won't do?" I said
"Oh there is more." Brass said, motioning us past the heads. We walked to an equipment building seeing the words.
How do you like this CSI?
My mouth fell open as George walked over to the words smeared in blood.
"Well I think we can say this person has a beef against us."
"Yeah in bold print." I said
I took pictures of the message on the wall after we recovered. Taking a long que-tip I wiped some blood on it looking at it. Walking over to the fence I looked over it shining a light around the long grass on the hillside. George walked over seeing me.
"Hey." He said, watching as I jumped dropping my flashlight. "Sorry."
"What do you need?"
"I just wanted to know how you are getting on here."
"Fine I think. I was looking down the hillside seeing if I could see anything."
He walked over shining his light over.
"It's worth a look."
We walked to the gate leading to the hillside. I took one area as George took the other. Flies buzzed around and I knew that a body was nearby.
"George!" I called, seeing his light shine in my direction. "I think I found one!"
He started over as I walked down. The hill suddenly dipped down and I screamed falling down it rolling all the way hitting a body.
"Sara, are you all right?" George called
"Yeah, there is a drop off!" I said, getting up wiping my pants off. I got my light seeing a body of a man lying on his back. As I got closer I saw that one of his eyes were gone.
"Does the body have its head?" He asked, trying to get down.
"Yes, but no eye."
He came to stand near me looking me over.
"You sure you're all right?"
"Yeah." I said
"This man looks like he was run over look at the tire marks." He said, pointing to the tracks across his shirt.
"His feet are blistered." I said, looking at the blisters on his feet.
"So this man was walking without shoes, he gets run over and loses an eye?"
"Sounds like a long bad day." I said
As we arrived back at the lab I could feel the bruises form. Sophia and George walked down the hallway talking as they carried evidence. I went to bathroom to look at my stomach area. I came out seeing my husband standing in a black suit talking with the sheriff. I stood there admiring his side view as he nodded talking. He said goodbye to the sheriff walking to his office shutting the door turning he was ambushed by me. I kissed him slowly putting my arms around his back moving them under his coat. Moving to his neck I kissed the spots I knew would drive him crazy.
"Sara, what are you doing?"
"I like you in this suit." I said, kissing him again. He pulled me back as I smiled looking at his dazed expression.
"I think you need to take a cold shower, dear."
"Come on, let me kiss the boss."
"No, you have to behave yourself."
I groaned trying to get him to let me go. He opened the door motioning me out. I went past him only to stop lean up and kiss him. He pulled me back again.
"No, Patience is a virtue."
"Not for me." I said
He closed the door and I walked away. He came home undoing his tie coming into the bedroom seeing me sleeping in bed. As he changed and got in I jumped up climbing over him kissing his lips. Moving back I looked down at him.
"You're late." I said
"Sorry dear."
"You changed." I said, disappointed.
"It's still me."
"I know it just turned me on seeing you in that suit."
"I think I can turn you on without the suit." He said
"Really, how?" I asked, smiling.
"You'll see."
I leaned down kissing him feeling him roll me over staying true to his word to turn me on. I rolled over the next day feeling his side was empty. Getting up I went to the bathroom then I walked out to the living room.
"Grissom?"
He came around the corner stopping as he saw me. I looked him up and down in his work clothes.
"You're going to be late." He said
"You're going to as well." I said, walking over kissing him. He kissed me opening his eyes lifting his arm to look at his watch. I moved back giving him a look as he lowered his arm.
"I should get to work." He said
I nodded watching him walk away. He stopped at the front door seeing me walk over to the kitchen counter. He looked at the door then walked over pulling me to him giving me a passionate kiss that took my breath away. I leaned against the counter when he walked back to the door leaving.
I walked to the building as shift was just beginning. George was coming out with his case seeing me.
"You're late."
"Sorry."
"Come with me." He said, racing to the Tahoe.
"What's going on?" I asked
"Headless bodies were found along the highway."
I got in watching him start the engine.
"What about Sophia?"
"She has to go to a meeting."
I jerked back as he backed up fast. We arrived seeing no police cars around. George stopped the car across from the spot the bodies should have been at.
"This doesn't feel right." I said
George got out his phone showing me the no service on his caller id. He looked over seeing something in the grass.
"There is something over there."
"I think we should go and call for backup." I said
He looked over at me.
"You have your gun?"
"No, it's in my locker at work."
He sighed checking his. He put it back opening the door.
"I am going to check it out then we can go."
"George, your breaking protocol."
"I am well aware that I am. Go out of the other side and try to see if you can get coverage."
I sighed watching him get out then I got out on my side looking at my phone. Walking around I heard something like a groan.
"George?" I called, walking around the car. He was gone. I swallowed walking over slowly seeing a flashlight on the ground. Looking around I turned seeing a man in black. I tried to run but he caught me putting a taser to my neck.
George moved moaning feeling the pain in his neck. He realized quickly that his hands were bound behind him and he was in a smelly trunk. The car was traveling as it hit bumps in the road. George could see some light coming from the hood. He moved closer but stopped when he felt someone else beside him in the same position.
Sara. It came to him. The gag in his over his mouth caused the biggest problem he moved his head over to mine poking his nose into my cheek. He made noise trying to rouse me finally giving up he sighed laying back down. I jumped awake feeling the pain in my head grow. I moved knowing already what was happening. When movement behind me caught my attention. I turned seeing George staring at me with wide eyes.
The car stopped as someone got out of the car. I looked at the hood waiting. Nothing happened as we waited. I looked back at George who motioned to the light shining in. Moving I peeked out seeing a barn with a light shining down. The man in black walked up to the large doors opening it he turned on the light inside. I noticed saws and other wood working tools along the walls. Turning to George I reached over with my teeth getting his gag off as he did the same for me.
"There is a barn with a saw he's in there." I said
"Can you see a lever to open the trunk hood?" He asked
I turned looking then I looked back at him.
"No."
I looked back through the hole seeing the man walking over with a knife. We froze as he opened the trunk looking at us.
"What are you going to do to us?" I asked
He reached down without a word pulling me out as he closed the trunk leaving George inside. I could hear him yelling my name as he pounded on the hood with his feet. The man walked me to the barn closing the door behind him. I shook seeing blood on everything even the saws.
He took me to a handmade box that was lying on the ground.
"Please I can't be put in that! I am claustrophobic!" I said
He threw me inside it and I screamed as he closed the lid on top of me. I moved around trying to breathe as he began to drag the box outside. I could hear something like a machine then something lifted the box up and drove somewhere dropping me. The box was dragged a little and with a thud was dropped somewhere. I screamed hearing dirt being thrown down and I knew I was going to be buried alive. I could only think that George was suffering the same fate. Closing my eyes I thought of Grissom wanting him to telepathically know that I was in danger. The air was getting thin.
With my almost last breathe I said a little prayer that someone would find me then I let the darkness take hold.
"Sara!" A voice shouted
George looked down as nick tried to open the box with a crowbar as he held a blanket over his body. Nick got the box open seeing me inside looking blue.
"I got her!" He yelled "She's not breathing!"
He lifted me out seeing George and Gregg drag me out. Nick climbed out helping Greg with CPR. George looked over seeing Brass and Grissom run over with Catherine looking down at me.
"Come on Sara!" Greg said, as he pushed on my stomach.
"Sara, don't you give up!" Nick said
Grissom looked at George who looked at him sadly.
"Sara!" Greg shouted, as I arched my back coughing.
They all let the breath go that they had been holding. Lying on my side I coughed feeling my hands being untied. I gasped trying to breathe as someone pulled me up in their arms smoothing my hair back. I opened my eyes hearing shouting for help as I looked at Grissom. My eyes closed and I laid my head against his chest.
A few weeks later I sat staring into space in the locker room. A locker closed startling me as I looked over seeing a person leave. Sitting on the bench I sighed looking down seeing my hands still shaking a bit. After talking to a counselor about the experience I felt better, but there were still signs that my experience was still with me.
I walked out looking around at people seeing that some glanced at me as I passed. George opened his door to his office for me to come in then he shut the door.
I sat down watching him sit at his desk.
"Okay Sara, your first day back. How are you doing?"
"Good."
He nodded looking me over.
"You have been given a good report from the counselor and I see no reason why you can't be out in the field."
"Great." I said
He signed a paper pushing to towards me to sign as well. I took the pen he handed out and signed. He watched me hand him the paper.
"Why are you shaking?" He asked
I looked down seeing my hand was shaking.
"It just does that now."
He nodded taking the paper.
"So what do you want me to do?"
"Well you can take it easy for now. If Nick calls for backup I will send you out."
"Okay."
I left his office walking around. Grissom was not in his office so I went to the break room to sit down and read a magazine. George came into the conference room seeing Grissom sitting down waiting for the sheriff and Ecklie to come in.
"Hi Gil." He said, as he sat down next to him.
"Hello, how's the shift going?"
"Great."
"Did Sara come in?"
"Yes, I just saw her. She seems like she is ready to go." He said, opening the file he brought.
"While she was off I heard nothing but complaining."
"I'll bet." George said, chuckling.
I stared at nothing in the break room as Brass walked by seeing me.
"Sara…..Sara!" He called
I blinked looking at him.
"Hey, you seemed miles away." He said, smiling as he stood by the door.
"I guess I was." I said "What are you doing?"
"I just got back from a scene."
"Nick's?" I asked, standing.
"No, Catherine's." He said
"Oh."
He reached for his radio listening to the voice talking.
"Ten-four." He said "I got to go."
"Bye." I said, watching him walk away. I sat down again looking at the wall across the room. For hours nothing happened Grissom saw me leaning against the wall near his office as he returned from a meeting. I stared at him with a frown as he unlocked his door.
He went in glancing at me keeping the door open. I walked over closing the door seeing him put papers on his desk. He walked over looking at me still frowning.
"I take it you had a bad shift."
"No, I'm just bored."
"You can help me with paperwork."
"What kind?"
"You can stamp papers."
"All right."
We got to work and for a while it was busy and then it slowed down. Grissom looked at papers as I sat back in a chair playing with one of his pens.
He looked over at me as he set the paper down in front of me then he sat back. I stamped it putting on the large pile at the corner of his desk.
He reached over taking my hand.
"I was thinking about something."
"What?" I asked
"Starting a family."
I looked at him with wide eyes.
"I know you said you are happy just being us, but I think we should start thinking about it."
"Okay con, I would be pregnant."
"Pro, you would be pregnant."
"Con, I would have to stop working."
"You would get more rest."
"Con, I would get fat ankles."
"I could massage them." He said, smiling faintly.
"Con, what if I lose the baby?"
"I would never let you."
I let go of his hand standing.
"Grissom, what if I hurt the baby?"
"Why would you hurt it?"
"You know why. My mother's genes are inside me."
"Sara, you will not hurt the baby." He said, taking my hand again.
I sat down again looking at the floor.
"I…can't breathe!"
He moved his seat closer holding my hands in his.
"Take a deep breath. Sara, it will be all right."
"I can't do it. I can't have a baby."
"You need to calm down."
I looked at him.
"Just think about it." He said
I slowly nodded. As Grissom slept after shift in bed as I paced in the living room. The entire idea of a baby was crazy. I knew I couldn't do it, but Grissom want's one. Getting dressed I went to Brass's house knocking on his door. He yawned walking in his robe to the door opening it seeing me.
"Sara?"
"Can I come in?" I asked
"Honey, you should be sleeping." He said, letting me in. "Is everything all right?"
"Yeah, I just couldn't sleep." I said, holding myself.
"Come have some warm milk." He said, leading me into his kitchen. He yawned again getting a pot pouring milk inside then placing it on the stove.
"I shouldn't have woke you."
"It's all right." He said "Tell me what is wrong."
"Grissom wants to have a baby." I said
"You don't?"
"No, I don't. He said to think about it, and I did." I said, pacing again.
"Honey, you need to stop worrying. If it happens then it happens."
"How can I have a baby? I am not maternal."
"That's what every woman says."
"I don't want to ruin this for Grissom, but I just can't."
He walked over pulling me to him.
"You have to tell Grissom. This is not just what he wants it is what you want as well."
"He will hate me."
"No he will not. I have known him a long time."
The milk was hot and he let go of me pouring it into a cup. I took it drinking some.
"Dad, I am really scared."
He sighed touching my cheek. Grissom looked around for me worried as I was missing. He got his phone out hearing the front door open as I came in.
"Where were you?" He asked, walking over. I closed the door looking at him.
"I went to dad's house."
"You could have called."
"Sorry."
"What's wrong?"
I walked over taking his hand.
"Grissom, I don't….want children ever."
He silently looked at me.
"If I did, it would be to make you happy and I just can't."
"I never wanted you to just make me happy. This is not my marriage it is ours."
"Your disappointed."
"No, I am not. It's okay."
I looked at him seeing that he was okay with it. I leaned up against him as he put his arms around me.
"I love you." He said
"Good."
He chuckled.
A week later I drove to work noticing something was not right. The building was surrounded by police cars and the officers were kneeling down with guns ready to shoot. I parked getting out walking over seeing a cop stopping me.
"What's happening?"
"Shot's fired in the building." He said
"Is any one injured?"
"We don't know."
I walked away looking at the building scared. Getting my cell out I called Grissom's phone.
"Come on Grissom." I said, hearing an ambulance siren coming. I hung up trying to get Brass. When no one answered I sighed scared as the ambulance went by me. I looked over seeing some people coming out with the police. Running over I saw Greg coming out walking around upset.
"Greg, what's going on?"
He came over hugging me.
"They shot….Grissom." He said
I moved back looking at him.
"Grissom?"
He nodded crying.
"Is he all right?" I asked, trying not to cry.
He shook his head sniffing. I almost fell if it hadn't been for him. A stretcher came out with someone on it. I ran over seeing it was one of the lab workers. Shaking I ran into the building seeing two men lying with guns in the hallway. Looking to the side I saw someone lying on the floor with a sheet over them. My heart stopped as I walked over slowly seeing the dress shoes.
"Sara!"
I turned seeing Brass running over pulling me to him.
"Where is Grissom?" I asked
He moved back touching my tear stained face.
"Honey."
"Where is he?"
"He was shot." He said, watching as I sobbed. He hugged me again. "He went to the hospital with a stomach wound."
"He…can't…die."
"I'll take you to the hospital."
Catherine ran over to us.
"I just got a call from the hospital. He didn't make it." She said
I looked at her as she looked at me.
"Grissom is….?"
"No, he is all right. I was talking about Henry from trace." She said, sadly. "They told me Grissom will be out of surgery soon."
"Let's go." He said, pulling me along.
Grissom laid in bed in the hospital. I stood beside his bed holding in sobs as I looked at him. Brass came in looking at Grissom. He walked over touching my arm as I moved putting my head against his shoulder letting the pain out. He hugged me trying to soothe my crying.
I sat later looking at my husband rubbing his hand as it rained outside. He looked peaceful as he laid there.
Grissom moved his head groaning opening his eyes blinking to focus. I stood looking outside not sleeping all night. He moaned making me look over.
"Grissom?" I said, walking over seeing him look at me.
"Sara?"
I smiled with tears in my eyes letting my head fall to his chest as he lifted his hand touching my head. A few weeks later I laid with Grissom on the couch. He was enjoying his time off and I was happy he had survived. The movie on the TV became exciting due to a car chase, but I was not interested. Instead I turned my head and looked at him as he laid beside me watching the movie. He looked down at me noticing my stare.
"Every time I look at you, you are staring at me." He said
"I just like looking at you." I said
"You look tired."
"I can't sleep thinking that you'll disappear."
"Sara, I won't disappear."
"You could."
"Stop worrying."
I nodded looking back at the TV. He looked at me touching my cheek.
"We live in a world where anything could happen. You could die, I could die. The trick is to love each other and be happy."
I looked back at him watching him lean down kissing me. He moved back as I pulled him back down for another. After that we held each other content from then on.
As the weeks went by I felt strange like something was not right inside. I didn't tell Grissom because he would only worry. Coming home early because I was throwing up at work I ran to the bathroom with a bag. My mind was going crazy as I paced waiting for the pregnancy test to be ready. The timer dinged as I took the test sitting on the toilet looking down.
"Oh no!" I said, seeing it was positive. Throwing it to the floor I held my head breathing in and out fast. My memories of us in bed and my blaming this on my slack behavior after he came home from the hospital made me sick.
Grissom came home late seeing me standing in the middle of the room looking at him. He closed the door watching me walk over slowly.
I lifted my hand showing him the pregnancy test. He dropped his things taking it as I looked at him. He looked at me in shock.
"What is this?"
"It's a pregnancy test."
He looked down again then at me.
"What am I looking at?"
"I…I'm pregnant."
His eyes got huge as I burst into tears. We both just looked at each other.
"You're pregnant?" He asked
I nodded sobbing.
"Sara." He said
"This….is…terrible!"
He pulled me to him kissing my head dropping the test on the floor. Later I slept against him as he stayed awake thinking about this event.
"A baby." He said
The next shift I looked like death from crying over and over. Brass entered the garage I was working in looking at me the same way Grissom did.
"Your pregnant?" He asked
I nodded slowly.
"Oh honey." He said, coming over hugging me.
"I hate this."
"Sara, this is wonderful news."
"No, it's not." I said
He moved back touching my cheek.
"Baby, it is good news."
I hugged him again still hating it.
Two months later I was showing. Not being able to drink coffee was making me irritable. George saw me walking down the hallway holding a paper.
"Sara." He said, motioning over to him.
I stopped walking over to him.
"I heard about your disagreement with Sophia."
"I apologized."
"This is the third time I have heard about a fight involving you and someone else."
"It's been a rough two months." I said
"Yes, I know, but…"
"Can I go?"
"Sara, are you going to be nice?"
"I have mood swings."
"Try to hold them in."
I sighed walking away. George watched me leave then he went into his office. Grissom watched me come into his office slamming the door.
"Can you fire someone?"
"No dear."
I paced angry.
"Sara, you are tense."
"It's this no coffee rule. I hate this. Who says the baby will be harmed if I drink one cup?"
"Medical doctors." He said, sitting back in his chair.
"Men have the life. I would love to be a man right now."
"I wouldn't."
"I am not going to make it!"
"Yes you will."
I looked down touching my stomach.
"This thing is inside me and I don't love it."
"Sara, you are making yourself upset. Stop and just relax." He said
I closed my eyes taking a long breath.
"I want you to wait up for me after shift and I will give you a bubble bath and a massage."
I nodded going to the door leaving. Grissom watched the door close as he sadly looked at it. He came home finding me in bed sleeping in one of his shirts. Easing into the bed he touched my belly leaning over kissing it.
As the months rolled on slowly I curiously would look at how my stomach jutted out more and more. Looking at myself in the mirror in the bedroom became an obsession. I would run my hands over the smooth skin feeling the baby move its fingers with mine. My opinion started to change over time and I began to realize that this was not a punishment, but a gift. Grissom could see my mood change and he relaxed knowing I was making peace with the baby.
In the hallway on my eighth month Brass put his hand on my baby bump feeling the baby kick. He smiled leaning over kissing my head. My maternity leave started and even though I was not happy about it I still took it as a sign to fix a bedroom into a nursery.
I got up on my ninth month feeling a pain. Grissom was up getting ready to leave when I came out holding onto the wall.
"Honey?" He said
"It's time." I said
We raced to the hospital and the baby just popped out with hardly any contractions. Brass walked over quickly seeing Grissom looking in where the babies were put in beds so the parents and relatives could see.
"Hey Gil."
Grissom looked at him smiling.
"Hello grandpa."
Brass poked him looking in at the many babies crying and sleeping.
"Which one is ours?"
"The one in the front." Grissom said, pointing.
Brass looked in seeing a sleeping baby tucked in a blanket.
"Boy or girl?"
"Boy."
"Great."
"Sara named him James Brass Grissom." Grissom said
Brass looked at him then he looked in at his name sake.
"That's…..wonderful." Brass said
"I think it's a good, strong name. Hopefully he will be just as courageous as his namesake."
Brass felt tears in his eyes as he looked in nodding.